Authors: Adrienne Torrisi
Mel squeezes my hand more tightly.
Nate’s mom runs onto the court to help.
Thank God she’s here.
I feel tears slide down my cheeks as they carry him off.
Why is this happening? I knew it.
I plead with Marcus to help him. Who cares about the stupid game? Nothing is worth this.
As soon as Jake is off the court, the game starts up again. The rest of the boys know they need to play no matter how concerned they are for Jake. We are only up by thirteen, and there are less than five minutes left.
I can’t take my eyes off Jake as I watch him disappear down the hall. Mel is still holding my hand, and once he’s out of sight, we both turn to one another.
“Go,” she says, gesturing in the direction they just took him.
She said one tiny word, but it speaks volumes. I’m not sure she will ever be able to forgive us, but this is as close to her blessing as we will ever get. Her eyes are filled with concern, love, and understanding. She is a bigger person than I will ever be, and I don’t think I can express in words how much this means to me.
This is everything I needed to allow myself to really feel what I think I have known since the first day I ever laid eyes on Jake when we were five and his family moved into the house behind ours. I will never forget feeling the flip of butterflies in my stomach for the very first time when I saw his messy hair and incredible eyes peering over the fence. But what sealed the deal for my heart was when he smiled at me, and I saw how sweet and vulnerable he was all at the same time. My heart knew instantly what it took years for my brain to figure out.
It feels like I’m running in slow motion; I can’t move fast enough. I don’t know where I’m going until a security guard points me in the direction of the medical facility.
When I turn the corner, my eyes land on him. He’s lying on a padded medical table in one of the exam rooms, wearing an oxygen mask.
“Dani!” Nate’s mom puts her arm out to stop me as I try to push into the room. “They are helping him, honey.” I can’t read her expression. Then again, she’s an expert at hiding if there is reason to be concerned.
“I need to see him,” I say, trying to peer past her.
She pulls me back. “They need a minute, honey.”
“Please,” I say, losing all control. I can barely catch my breath. All of the feelings I have pushed deep inside, that I have convinced myself didn’t exist or didn’t allow myself to feel, are bubbling over. I can’t pull myself together. I feel sanity slipping away.
The reality of losing Jake slams into me. I already know all too well what it feels like to lose someone you love.
I need to see him. I need to know he is okay.
“Dani, they are helping him. They need space to do that.” Nate’s mom pulls me farther back out into the hallway. She runs her hands over my hair with such motherly love and concern. It’s an unfamiliar feeling, foreign to me, and I automatically think she has an agenda, like my mom always does. I push those thoughts away and peel myself out of my comfort zone to accept her embrace as she wraps her arms around me.
We hear muffled cheers from the crowd. I’m not sure who scored, but I hope it was us.
“Can you wait here?” Her smile is filled with concern for me and for Jake. I know I need to let her go to help him; that’s why she’s here.
I’m up against the wall, trying to grip the cement bricks for support.
I nod because I don’t have the strength to say anything else.
“Is this Daniella?” one of the medics asks, popping his head through the doorway.
“Yes,” Nate’s mom speaks for me.
“He’s asking for her. He won’t let us work on him until she’s back here.”
Nate’s mom drops her head and shakes it as if she can’t win with either of us. She just got me to calm down and convinced me to stay out here.
I’m instantly filled with hope. If he’s asking for me, he must be okay. I quickly wipe my tear-streaked cheeks and try to pull myself together for him.
Jake is being restrained by two of the team trainers. He’s trying to sit up while they hold him down. I can tell he’s in pain
. God, I hate Jackson. Is a win really that important?
As soon as I enter the room, his eyes meet mine, and he calms down enough to allow them to regain control.
“Daniella,” he says my name breathlessly as he pulls the oxygen mask away from his nose and mouth. “Who’s winning?” I can tell he’s having trouble breathing,
but I can’t help
laughing at his question.
“I don’t know. I ran back here to be with you.”
He smiles a deep, satisfied smile laced with a tiny bit of cockiness and a tiny bit of shock. It’s a gorgeous smile that reveals his incredible dimples.
“Jake, we need you to lie back,”
the team doc says.
“I’ve gotta go out there. I can play. I just needed to catch my breath.” He tries to sit back up, removing the mask again.
“Let us decide that,” Nate’s mom says firmly as she steps in.
Knowing better than to argue with her, he finally gives in and lies back. He starts to breath in deeply, allowing the oxygen to help refill his lungs.
His eyes study me, and he pulls the mask away, trying to sit up again. “Were you crying?” His voice is filled with concern.
“No,” I answer quickly. He has enough to worry about.
Nate’s mom gives a small chuckle under her breath and smiles at me while she works on Jake.
He gives me questioning eyes while one of the medics places the oxygen mask back over his nose and mouth. They gently guide him to lie back, but his eyes never leave mine.
I want to grab his hand, touch him, let him know I’m here. However, there is no room for me; he’s surrounded by people checking him out to make sure there is no major re-injury. Instead, our eyes never leave each other. That is my one connection to him, and neither of us dares break it.
“Okay, Jake,” the team doc finally speaks. “I think you just had the wind knocked out of you. It doesn’t look like the ribs were displaced, and there’s no sign of further damage. It just hurt like a bitch because he slammed right into the break, but I guess my tape job held up.” He gives him a warm smile.
“You got lucky, but you really should sit out the rest of the game.”
Jake pulls his mask off, struggling to sit up until he finally does. “Come on, Doc; I need to play. There can’t be a lot of time left. Please,” he pleads. I don’t think I have ever heard this kind of desperation in his voice before.
It catches the team doc by surprise, too, and he looks to Nate’s mom, who pulls the oxygen mask off completely. “Take a deep breath, Jake.”
He obeys. He already seems a hundred times better.
My heart begins to steady with relief.
“Give us one more,” Doc says, placing his stethoscope on Jake’s back. He looks to Nate’s mom with a smile, and they both nod.
“I’m not sure how, but you sound good to us,” Nate’s mom says.
“And since there’s not much time left, let’s do it.” The team doc slaps him on the shoulder.
I don’t think I have ever seen a smile filled with such pure joy grace Jake’s face. It eases whatever concerns I have.
“I just need a second,” he says to the room, and everyone is nice enough to clear out into the hallway. Then he grabs my hand and interlaces his fingers with mine. He knows there is limited time left in the game, so I’m shocked he’s doing this.
“Dani, I’ve gotta go do something.” He smiles and gestures toward the court with his head. “But I need to tell you what I should have told you years ago and then weeks ago and then minutes ago, but I’m telling you now. I know you said you need time, but I need you to know that I love you. And if nothing else, when I went down on the court, I realized I didn’t want you to be by my side; I
needed
you to be here. It made me realize what is truly important.
“I know now that my love for you doesn’t take away my love for Marcus. It doesn’t change how much he meant to me, how much he will always mean to me. But I can’t hide it anymore. I love you. I have always loved you. I will always love you. I’m going to go win this game … and then I’m going to show you just how much you mean to me like I should have done the first day I met you.”
“Well, we were five.” I give him a smile that I hope he reads as ‘I feel the same way.’
He returns my smile with a small laugh as he brushes his thumb across my cheek then places a loose strand of hair behind my ear. It’s as if time is frozen until I realize it isn’t. He needs to get back out there.
“Go. Win. I’ll be here,” I say with a quick squeeze of his hand before I drop it then watch as he runs back to the court.
I run behind to follow him. His parents are waiting at the doorway, and they sigh with relief as soon he reemerges. The girls on the squad have the same relieved look when their eyes land on me. The crowd goes wild as soon as they see him, the roar deafening. Jake is already in his play-to-win zone, and he barely has a reaction.
I anxiously glance at the scoreboard as I rejoin the girls on the sideline mid-cheer. There’s one minute left, and it’s a three-point game.
Before I know it, Jake is back on the court.
The Jaguars have the ball, and there is no Jackson in sight. He had to leave the court since he was ejected from the game.
Their player shoots and scores, and now it’s a one-point game.
Cam takes the ball back down the court. He passes to Jake, and I hold my breath without even realizing I’m doing it. Jake makes a move, and the other team fouls him, so he gets to take two free throws.
He’s at the line. The Jaguar fans are slamming their feet down on the ground and shouting out to distract him. Jake is used to it, though. In fact, he thrives on it.
His first shot is beautiful, and it goes right in. We are back up by two.
He bounces the ball twice then takes his second shot.
Swish
. We are up by three.
The Jaguars quickly take the ball back down, but by some divine force, Dax blocks their shot and steals the ball. He throws a long pass to Nate, who is running back to our side of the court, and Nate passes to Vizzi.
There are forty seconds left in the game, so we can run the clock down before we have to take a shot. The boys know this, and I see them having a conversation with looks and head nods as they quickly pass the ball to one another. Their non-verbal communication comes from years of playing together. Vizzi is right there with them, channeling Marcus. Without Jackson, our boys are faster than the other team, and we are playing them like a fiddle.
Jake gives the signal when the shot clock is at five, and they are off.
Cam gets the ball and passes to Nate, who is lined up to take a perfect three-pointer. He shoots, and the ball soars through the air. It looks like it’s going in. It rolls around the rim as if it’s toying with all of our emotions, and then it drops through the net.
Our side of the crowd goes nuts.
We are up by six with ten seconds left.
Our boys relax for one second as the Jaguars take the ball down. It’s obvious they aren’t ready to give up yet. They take a three pointer and nail it. Their side erupts, but there are only five seconds left on the clock.
Cam takes the ball back down to our side. He quickly passes to Jake, and as soon as the ball is in his hand, he knows he has this; I see it all over his face.
The Jaguars are all over him, and they foul him again, desperately trying to buy themselves time, but too bad for them our best player has the ball.
It’s a three-point game, and Jake is literally standing on the line to end it once and for all. If he misses, they could have a shot. If he makes them both, we win.
The Jaguar fans are so loud I can barely hear the thoughts in my head, but a peace washes over Jake’s face. He’s unfazed.
Marcus is with him. It’s as if they are both taking these shots together.
He bounces the ball twice like he always does, and then the ball flies through the air …
Swish
. One point.
He bounces the ball twice again. I have seen him do this a million times, but this time is different. It’s as if he knows this is it, the last shot he will ever take in high school. And it’s a perfect shot, perfect form, it flies right through the basket.
Swish
.
Our side of the crowd explodes. The Jaguars get the ball back with one second left on the clock and heave a Hail Mary almost the entire length of the court, but it’s not even close to going in, and even if it did, it wouldn’t matter. The Jaguars know it as they hang their heads down with defeat.
The buzzer erupts when the clock hits zero.
We won.
We won!
The rest of the team and the crowd swarm the court. I lose sight of Jake, but I know he’s in the middle of it, and I hope he’s taking it all in.
Everyone is hugging, screaming, crying. We are all overcome with emotions. We have been through so much these last few weeks, and this is the turning point for all of us.
I see Luke and Marcus’s mom and dad hugging the coach. The players are all including them in the celebration. For a small second, it’s as if Marcus is out there with them.