In Deeper (16 page)

Drake cracked a smile. “I’ll pencil it in.” He quickly sobered, and his face resumed its normal serious mien. “I didn’t tell Celeste I wasn’t able to stop the picture from getting out. Wanted her to feel better first before she gets the bad news.”

“It’s not like we can hide it from her. I’ll warn her.”

Silence fell between the brothers until Drake cleared his throat. “I appreciate what you’ve done for her. Celeste’s life hasn’t been an easy one, and I’m glad she has someone by her side.”

The heart-to-heart was out of character for Drake. Emma had softened Micah’s brother, made him more apt to share his feelings. Micah wasn’t sure which version of Drake he preferred, but he was uncomfortable discussing his feelings for Celeste with a man who’d once dated her. “She needed help. I’m here to give it to her. Nothing more.”

“You’re not pulling the wool over my eyes.” Drake backed away. A smile lightened his normally harsh features. “Make sure she stays in bed. That should be an easy enough task for you.”

Micah groaned. “Dude. Really?”

“Just saying,” Drake answered with raised hands and an amused expression. “Tie her to the bed if you have to.”

Micah rolled his eyes. He wasn’t even going to broach that subject with his brother. Shoving through the door, he found Celeste waiting on the opposite side. Her eyes were huge golden pools dominating her wan face. “Don’t make me stay here. I have to work.”

Before today he’d never realized how much of a workaholic she’d become. A true match for Drake. He’d never been lazy, but it was unfathomable that she’d risk her life to save her career. “Sorry, Celeste. The alpha has spoken.”

It was simple enough to blame his brother for disappointing Celeste. Her shoulders slumped, and she moved away from him, dejection evident in every line of her slim body. She perched on the edge of the bed, refusing to glance at him.

A sigh escaped him. He didn’t want to upset her. He’d spent so many years attempting to get under her skin. Accomplishing it now was a slap in the face. He closed the door behind him and went to her. He knelt before her and placed his hands on her knees. Her skin was cool beneath his palms, an improvement over the raging fever she’d had earlier.

“Are you OK?”

She lifted her head and pinned him with a desolate gaze. “No. I don’t want to be imprisoned here while some bastard sabotages my company. I’m not a weak female who allows the menfolk to protect her. That person isn’t me. You know it isn’t.”

He lifted one hand and cupped her cheek. “I know. You’re strong. Fearless. I admire your determination, even though it makes me furious sometimes. No one thinks you’re weak, Celeste. You’re a strong woman and an even stronger wolf. It’s not weakness to let us help you.”

“Why?” She shook her head, as if shaking aside bad thoughts. “I understand Drake’s concern for me, but why are you doing all of this? The sex is great of course, but you’ve put your life on pause for me. Why would you do that?”

“Because the sex is phenomenal.” He’d thought she would smile, but she turned her face away. He silently cursed, struggling for a way to put into words how much she meant to him without giving everything away. “Because when I’m with you, I feel whole.”

She turned back to him. “You didn’t before?”

“No.” He held her gaze, hoping she read the truth in his eyes. “What were we arguing about that night? During Drake’s wedding?”

She shook her head. “I don’t remember. You stepped on the hem of my gown, I believe.”

He recalled the beautiful gold dress she’d worn, created by a designer whose name he couldn’t pronounce, and she’d never been more stunning. A golden goddess come to life, unattainable, erotic, and gorgeous. “I barely remember how we got to the room, but once I had you in my arms, there was no going back. I should’ve run, left you in that hotel room and buried my feelings, but I didn’t.”

She pulled his hand away from her cheek. “You always talk about leaving me. One day, I’ll believe you’re serious. Do you really want that?”

“It would be for the best.”

“For whom?” Anger brought color into her cheeks. “I want to be with you. I think you want to be with me too. What holds you back?”

The reason that used to fall so easily from his lips stopped somewhere between his subconscious and his tongue. Drake knew about them. He wasn’t standing in their way, not anymore. So why was he so scared to admit he cared for her?

He pictured sharing his life with her. The shadow of her relationship with his brother would always be there, mocking him with the belief that he’d never be good enough for her.

Drake was everything he wasn’t, good, strong, honorable. What did he have to offer Celeste? Nothing but great sex and a few laughs. Was it enough for her?

He got to his feet slowly, like an old man realizing that his body isn’t that of a teenager anymore. “One day you’ll wake up and realize you deserve better. I have nothing to offer you, Celeste. Nothing. I won’t be the man who holds you back.”

“What are you talking about?” She tried to stand, but exhaustion seemed to weigh her down and she remained sitting. “You’re not the wastrel you seem to think you are. You have a successful music career. You’re undeniably attractive, and you didn’t hesitate to play the hero for me. You didn’t have to help me, but you did. No questions asked. You stepped in and helped me when any other person would’ve run the opposite direction. I haven’t always been nice to you. Lord knows I haven’t. But you risked your tour to rush home and be with me. So don’t tell me you have nothing to offer me, because in my mind you have everything I want.”

Her words practically knocked him on his ass. Words he’d never thought she would say, about him no less, made him feel like less of a loser and more of a man. “The comparisons to Drake won’t stop, Celeste. If we go public, people will know that you were once with him and wonder if you settled for second best.”

She finally succeeded in getting to her feet. Every inch of her body seemed to vibrate. Her eyes elongated, her emotions pushing her closer to shifting. She advanced on him, her finger lifted and pointed at the center of his chest. “You were never my second choice. How many times do I have to tell you that? It’s always been you, Micah. I don’t look at you and see your brother. I see you, the man you tried to hide from me. Guess what? It didn’t work. I saw through your act and straight to the goodness that’s inside you. You’re not second best, and if anyone believes that, then they’re a fool. Stop finding every reason under the sun not to be with me, and just be with me!”

He captured her finger between his hands, holding her prisoner by one small piece of her body. “All my life I did everything to stop the comparisons. I was never good enough, never fast or smart enough, to catch Drake. He’s two years older, but it may as well be a decade. He was the one who captured the heart of our family, the Society, even yours. I won’t lie and say I can easily forget he had you first, but if you’re willing to try, I can too.”

Her eyes glistened with moisture, but no tears fell. “I can’t be with someone who refuses to see himself like I do. I can’t keep waiting for the other shoe to drop, for you to wake up and decide you can’t get over my relationship with Drake. I’ve told you that part of my life is over. If you can’t accept it, then I have nothing left to offer you.”

“Celeste.” His voice croaked on her name. He’d reached the point of no return. “I…”

She pulled her hand free and held it palm out to him. “No. I’m not going to waste my time with someone who’s not sure if he wants to be with me.”

He reached for her, but she slipped out of his grasp. “Just leave.”

It was the last thing he wanted to do. He wanted to stay with her, make sure the effects of the poison wore off like the doctor promised, but her drawn face made him realize he had to go, had to leave her to heal in solitude.

He lowered his hands and stepped away from her. “I’ll have Drake check on you. Call if you need anything.”

He left the room, leaving her behind, and knowing that he’d somehow managed to lose the one thing he’d always wanted.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

Six hours after she’d sent Micah away, two hours since Drake had last checked on her, Celeste reached a decision. She couldn’t stay at the beach house. Not while someone threatened her company. The Randolphs would never let her out of their sight. Every minute she wasted brought her closer to being their prisoner. She had to leave now, tonight, while they still believed her too weak to attempt an escape.

Sliding out of bed, she stood, wobbling on unsteady feet. She felt like she was walking on pins and needles. She’d never been one to laze about in bed, and the hours she’d spent resting made her sluggish and cotton-mouthed. Or maybe it was the medicine she’d been pumped full of, the ones designed to combat the cyanide in her system.

Who? Who would want to poison her? It didn’t make sense. Each of her employees she considered a friend. Shouldn’t she have seen the signs? How did someone get close enough to poison her? Questions filled her mind as she dressed in a pair of designer jeans Micah had fetched from her house and one of Micah’s borrowed T-shirts. The shirt was too long, nearly to her knees, but it smelled like him. She brought the hem to her nose and sniffed. The clean, spicy scent reminded her of lying in his arms at night, and a wave of fresh pain washed over her.

Why had she sent him away? Because she’d had to. If she hadn’t, she never would’ve been able to leave. She would’ve never been able to tear herself away from the bed if he’d remained. The disappointment and hurt in his gaze had torn into her heart. She hadn’t wanted to hurt him, but she’d meant what she said. She wouldn’t risk her own happiness waiting for him to figure out what he wanted.

All she had with her were heels. She’d never be able to run in those. Wishing for a pair of sneakers, she crept barefoot across the room and eased open the door. A quick glance into the hallway assured her that everyone was asleep. There were no lights on except for the dim glow of track lighting above the stairs at the end of the hall.

She headed toward the stairs, careful to not make any sound. Her muscles felt stiff, weak from the enforced bed rest and medicine. She made it down the stairs and tiptoed to the front door. The alarm system was lit up with green LED numbers. She typed in the code Drake had given her a few days before and waited for the arm to disable.

The symbol of a lock remained. Frowning, she punched in the code once more. There was no beep to signal it had disarmed. Goddamn it, they’d changed the codes and didn’t tell her. She was familiar with the pattern Drake normally used, and she typed in the next logical choice. The lock symbol didn’t change.

She bit back a growl and slammed her hand down on the blinking panel. An alarm screeched, echoing through the tiled lobby and setting off a whistle sharp enough to wake the dead.

“Shit,” she muttered and yanked on the front door. She’d forgotten the dead bolt in her panic, and the wood creaked with the force she applied. Quickly shoving the door closed, she undid the bolt and reopened it.

Dew dampened her feet as she set off toward the driveway. She’d thought to have a chance to hot-wire one of Drake’s classic cars, but a new plan was in order. She couldn’t run the entire way to her home in Savannah, not in her current condition, but hopefully she could get far enough away to hide until morning.

Gravel scratched the bottom of her feet as she ran down the driveway and turned left onto the road. Her breath ratcheted in and out of her lungs. Exhaustion weighed her down, making it hard to run. She’d never get anywhere like this. Mourning the loss of her favorite pair of jeans, she willed the shift to come over her. There was no time to stop. Her limbs lengthened as she ran, until she dropped down on her hands, the wolf taking over her entire body.

It was easier to run in animal form. Powerful hind legs pushed her forward, allowing her to dart in and out of the sparse traffic easily as she left the private road and padded across the highway. There was still the matter of the bridge connecting the island to the mainland, but she just had to hope it was late enough that no one would notice a lone wolf. And that none of the cars hit her.

A whiff of something in the air, clean and tangy with a hint of spice, alerted her. She brought her head around and peered behind her. There was a bend in the road, so she wasn’t sure but then… Yes. Micah was following her. He was still in human form, and obviously he hadn’t yet gone to bed. He was dressed in the shirt and jeans he’d had on before.

She yelped and pushed herself harder. Faster, she had to go faster. If Micah shifted, there was no way she’d outrun him. She was weak and not nearly in as good a shape. The asphalt retained the heat of the day, warming the pads of her feet as she set off at a dead run. Her sides bellowed out with exertion. She had to hide, but her white coat would give her away. Unless she was on the beach.

She darted in front of a car. Brakes squealed, and she braced for the impact, but the car veered at the last minute, coming close enough for the heat of the engine to warm her skin. She crossed a shallow ditch and scrambled up a dune. Her paws sank into the sand, making it difficult to run.

She heard an anguished growl behind her and knew without checking that Micah had shifted. She careened across the sand, doing her best to reach the compacted area near the shore. If she reached it, she’d gain enough traction to hopefully outrun him.

Warm water encircled her ankles, and she pushed harder, praying endurance and strength training would see her through the escape. Moonlight warred with a haze of fog. She saw it all through a green lens. The more she ran, the more determined she was to make it. Her muscles burned with exertion. Sand abraded the pads of her feet, and the spray of salt water burned her eyes. Yet she kept pushing.

She ran for miles, until she reached the most rural part of the island. Trees lined the side of the beach, blocking her from the few scattered houses in the area. The woods were in her sight, the perfect place to hide, and she increased her pace. Before she could turn to the left and head for the line of trees, a body slammed into hers.