In His Eyes (7 page)

His heart stirred watching Ellene beside his daughter. Had life turned out differently, Caitlin could have been their child. He remembered how Ellene had talked about “one day when they had children.” She’d wanted a daughter for her and a son for him, as if they could divide their love and energy into two little beings. He knew what she meant, but the idea always made him smile.

“Not too much,” Ellene said.

Connor focused on the cookie making. Caitlin placed a small glob of dough in her hands, rolling it into a ball.

Ellene looked at him and grinned. “Her hands are so warm, she’s turning the dough into mush.”

He could see what she meant as Caitlin pulled her hands apart and the glob stuck to both palms.

“We’ll have to put flour on your hands,” Ellene said, showing more patience than Connor had ever seen her display.

Caitlin giggled as her gooey hands became white with flour. They tried again, and this time Caitlin dropped a round ball of dough onto the cookie sheet.

When they were finished, Ellene took a fork and showed Caitlin how to make crisscross marks on the dough. Connor had become so intrigued that he’d risen and stood over them, admiring the even marks etching each cookie.

“Good job,” he said, kissing Caitlin’s warm cheek.

She grinned and licked some dough from her fingers. “Want some? It’s good.”

“I’ll wait until it’s a cookie,” he said, chuckling at her offer.

By the time Ellene had cleaned the kitchen counter and placed the dirty dishes into the dishwasher, the scent of peanut butter cookies filled the room. The fragrance seemed to mesmerize them all. Ellene had forgotten her frustration at being stranded and had given him a smile when Caitlin stood close to the oven as if waiting for the door to open and the cookies to come floating out.

“Is it time yet?” she asked.

“Wait for the beep. I set the timer.” She chuckled as she pulled three glasses from the cabinet. “Warm cookies are nice with milk. Who wants some?”

Connor’s hand shot into the air as did Caitlin’s. Ellene lifted hers, too, then laughed at herself before pulling the gallon carton from the refrigerator.

When the glasses were filled, the buzzer sounded, and Ellene lifted the cookie sheets from the oven.

Caitlin licked her lips as she stood nearby watching the process.

“They have to cool a couple minutes before we can take them from the pan.”

“Why?” Caitlin asked.

“They’re still soft and they’ll fall apart. You don’t want to eat cookie crumbs do you?”

Caitlin licked her lips again and nodded.

Connor and Ellene laughed at the same time. The feeling of friendship and warmth—not only from the fresh-baked cookies but from their camaraderie—filled him with pleasure. Why couldn’t they always be this way?

Ellene grasped three pieces of paper towel and plopped two soft cookies onto each sheet, then handed one to Caitlin and one to him. They sat at the kitchen table and when Caitlin took her first bite, her face glowed.

Connor rubbed his belly. “Yummy. These are better than the ones in the store.”

“You don’t get home-baked cookies from your dad, do you?” he asked Caitlin.

Caitlin shook her head, crumbs dotting her lips. “But you give me other things. Ellene gives me cookies.”

His chest swelled, seeing his daughter so happy and normal, and his thanks went to Ellene for making them almost like a real family.

Real family.
The words snapped at him. Don’t fool yourself, Connor. This is no more real than your engagement years ago. At a moment’s notice, Ellene can walk out the door and leave you and Caitlin catching your breath. She did it once, and she can do it again.

E
llene woke with Pepper curled up against her chest, breathing into her face. She scooted the dog away from her, but the terrier wriggled back and licked her cheek.

She sat upright, lifting the dog and lowering him to the floor. She liked animals but getting that personal was a little uncomfortable.

She swung her legs over the mattress edge and ran her fingers through her tangled hair. She felt a mess without her own clothes, and she knew if this didn’t end soon, she’d have to go into town and find a few personal items. She was grateful Connor’s aunt had given her a toothbrush and loaned her a nightgown and a couple of knit tops.

How did she get herself into this mess? She shook her head, amazed that somehow fate had brought Connor and her back under the same roof—and stranded, to beat all.

Or was it fate?

Yesterday had seemed too comfortable. Her heart went out to Caitlin, and though she knew the child’s reaction to the forgotten cookies was over the top, she understood. Every broken promise felt as if someone were forsaking her—the same way she felt about her mother’s absence.

But Ellene didn’t want to get caught in the trap. Each moment her concern grew deeper for the child, and Connor was right. The little girl had latched onto her like paste to paper. As soon as the ferry service opened, Ellene knew she would be on her way home.

Home. She dug into her bag and pulled out her cell phone, then glanced at her watch, surprised at the time. For some reason, on the island, she slept more soundly, but she still woke early. Her father often went into the office early. She turned on her phone and dialed. He answered, as she’d hoped.

“Dad.”

“Ellene? What’s wrong?”

“I won’t be in today.”

She heard a pause, then his low grumble. “Why not?”

“I’m stranded.”

“Stranded?”

“On Harsens Island.”

“You’re kidding.”

She assured him she wasn’t and gave him the details. “I’ll get away as soon as the ferry service opens.”

“Don’t take chances sitting there in the cold.”

She was endangering herself more by staying at Connor’s. “I won’t.”

“Connor’s stranded there, too?”

“Connor, his aunt Phyllis and Connor’s daughter, Caitlin. Oh, and Pepper the terrier.”

Her father chuckled. “Are you getting along okay?”

“With Pepper or Connor?” She grinned at her question. “Pepper’s a bed hog.”

“Sounds like you’re fine. I’m pleased to hear you’ve forgiven Connor. It’s about time.”

She winced.

“Send my best to him and get back when you can. I’ll hold off your clients.”

“I’ll do as much as possible from the laptop.”

“Good girl. See you soon.”

“I hope,” she said.

After she hung up, she sat a moment, thinking of what her father had said.
It’s about time.
But she hadn’t forgiven him, and even if she could, she wouldn’t trust him.

Ellene knew she needed to safeguard her heart. If she spent time at Aunt Phyllis’s house, she could get some e-mail correspondence answered and do some figures on a couple of projects that were due when she got back.

An easier feeling spread over Ellene. She rose and headed for the shower. Warm water washed away her anxiety, and she felt more determined to stay
away from Connor. In the process, she’d be certain not to upset Caitlin when she left.

After dressing, Ellene headed into the kitchen and faltered in the doorway. Caitlin sat at the table, eating a piece of toast. “I came over to play,” she said.

“I can’t play today, Caitlin. I have work to do.”

The child’s lip stuck out for a moment, and then drew back in. “I’ll watch you.”

Ellene closed her eyes a moment to calm her thoughts. “Won’t your daddy miss you?”

She shook her head. “Aunt Phyllis is babysitting me while daddy runs some errands.”

Ellene glanced toward Connor’s aunt.

She turned from the stove. “He went to the hardware for batteries and candles. The electrical lines are icing over, and that can mean we may have some downed lines.”

Dandy. Now she’d be stranded with Connor in candlelight.
Heavenly Father, what is happening here?
“I hope it doesn’t come to that,” she said, trying to sound casual for Aunt Phyllis’s sake.

“We’ll survive.”

You may, but will I? “Speaking of errands,” Ellene said, “if the ferry doesn’t open soon, I’ll need to find a store to buy some clothes.”

“There’s a couple nice shops in town,” Phyllis said. “Stores open about ten, I think.”

“Have you heard anything new about the ferry?”

“Still closed. I called this morning.”

Ellene kept her mouth shut. She strode to the coffeemaker and grabbed a cup from the hook, then poured. The acrid scent told her the coffee had been made awhile ago, but she added milk and took a sip. Strong, but tolerable.

“Would you like some eggs?” Phyllis asked.

“No thanks. I’m not really hungry.”

Caitlin continued to watch her with wide eyes, apparently hoping she’d give in and entertain her.

“Where are the paper and crayons I bought you?”

“Over there.” She gave a little toss of her head.

Ellene noticed the items on a chair seat where Caitlin’s coat hung on the back. “How about drawing a picture and coloring it while I do some work?”

Caitlin thought about the suggestion, then slid off the chair and brought back the pad of paper and crayons, settling as near as possible to Ellene.

While Caitlin concentrated on the drawing, Ellene opened the laptop and found an outlet to plug it into. She opened her software program and clicked a correspondence folder, then opened the first file and scanned the contents.

Ellene heard the scrape of a chair leg and glanced up. Aunt Phyllis sat adjacent to her, sipping a coffee and eyeing her as if she had something to say.

Ellene smiled and went back to her work, hoping to discourage conversation. Pepper dodged in and out of her legs, which was distracting enough.

“This is you,” Caitlin said, turning the letter-size notepad toward her so she could see the picture. The child had drawn a stick figure with squiggles of dark curls and big fuzzy slippers.

“Very nice. Thank you,” Ellene said, turning back to the computer.

“You can keep it.”

“Great. I’ll get it when I’m finished.”

“Speaking of finished,” Phyllis said, “what happened between you and Connor to break off your engagement?”

The question smacked Ellene between the eyes. She sat dumbfounded, trying to decide how to answer the question or how to avoid answering with Caitlin present.

“Things happen,” she said after a grand pause.

“What things? You two seemed like peas in a pod.”

“Maybe that was the problem. We were too close.”

Phyllis’s eyes narrowed. “You can’t be too close. The Bible says, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.’ One flesh is pretty close.”

Ellene felt stymied. She sensed no answer would make Connor’s aunt happy. “We argued, I guess. It was so long ago.”

“Any relationship is made up of differing opinions. Arguments are healthy. They keep a person on his toes, and they teach patience. Remember the Lord
says to be humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. I don’t think you worked hard enough.”

Worked hard enough? “I know relationships aren’t always perfect, but they should be close to perfect.”

Aunt Phyllis pursed her lips. “Relationships are difficult, but God said that it’s not good for man to be alone. He meant woman, too. Life’s too lonely without a partner.”

“I’ve done okay by myself.”

“You think so?”

Ellene felt her eyes widen. “I’m happy with my work. I do my job well.”

“The Lord expects the wife to work for her husband. She works late into the night and makes a good home for her family so her husband is respected.”

“What about the wife?”

“She’s loved.”

Ellene lowered her head like a child being punished. She didn’t like being attacked—not attacked exactly—she felt cornered. “It just wasn’t meant to be with Connor and me.”

“Don’t be so sure.”

Ellene glanced at Phyllis and then Caitlin. The child appeared focused on her drawing, to Ellene’s relief. “Why would you say that?”

“How do you think you got here?”

“I asked my father the same question. Connor asked for me. He said he trusted my work.”

“I don’t mean that. You’re stranded on the island. Why did that happen?”

Awareness prickled up Ellene’s arms. “The ice jammed.”

“Who jammed the ice?” She lifted her index finger and pointed toward the ceiling.

Ellene followed the direction of her finger and stared at the white paint above her head. God? Had God really done this to her?

Caitlin’s head had tilted upward toward the ceiling, too, as if expecting to see something there.

God, this isn’t funny.

Connor paced his cottage, amazed at the envy he felt. Caitlin practically lived at his aunt’s where Ellene had holed herself up, he knew, to avoid him. They had to talk. He hadn’t wanted to get into all the details of their breakup, but maybe admitting his weakness would strengthen their friendship. Right now, he’d be grateful for that.

The snow drifted down as he stepped outside, and the temperature had not let up. The ice jam was firmer than it had been. Ellene’s escape seemed thwarted at every turn.

When he knocked and opened his aunt’s door, Pepper shot from the house like a missile. Connor grabbed for the dog’s collar, missed and slipped to the ground as his ire rose. “You dumb dog,” he shouted.

Pepper skidded to a stop and bounded back, his tongue swiping at Connor’s face.

“Get away from me, you mutt.”

Laughter billowed from the house, and Connor looked up and saw Caitlin watching him while holding open the storm door. Before he could rise, she was joined by his aunt and Ellene.

His fall had served one positive purpose. Ellene grinned at him as he struggled to rise on the slippery ground. Pepper was still nearby, so Connor captured him and hooked the chain in the yard on his collar before going inside.

“You need to get a fence around this place, Aunt Phyllis, if you’re going to keep that dog. He’ll be out on the road and gone before you know it.” That idea didn’t sound bad to Connor, but he knew his aunt would be in a tizzy, and he had to weigh one evil against the other.

Aunt Phyllis ignored his plea as she studied the thermostat. “I turned this down to conserve oil, but it’s too cold in here. I’m afraid the oil will run out, and I don’t want the pipes to freeze.”

After he’d checked the meter a few days earlier, Connor had figured her oil supply wouldn’t last, and he suspected they would have to pool resources. He prayed he had enough oil to keep his cottage warm until the channel opened.

“Let me check,” he said. “Caitlin held the door wide open. Maybe it’s just a chill from outside.”

“I don’t think so,” she said, “I turned it down really low.”

“I’ll look,” he said, reaching for the door handle and stepping outside.

As he headed for the tank, the terrier skipped around his feet until he ran out of chain. When Connor eyed the meter, it read very low. He eyed the mutt, realizing that not only Aunt Phyllis and Ellene would now be his house guests, but the irritating dog.

It wasn’t that he didn’t like animals. He did. He liked dogs—just not ones who licked his face and who tried to make an escape every time a door opened.

“Bad news,” he said, stepping inside. “Time to consolidate. You’ll have to move over to my place, and we’ll leave this very low and have to pray your pipes don’t freeze.”

He sidled a look at Ellene and saw her tense expression. Now, he’d never have a chance to talk unless he could get her away without Caitlin or his aunt around. The possibility seemed dubious.

“Sounds like a good idea,” his aunt said. “We’ll get our things and be over. I’m stiff as a board with this cold.”

She wasn’t the only thing stiff as a board, he noted as he looked at Ellene’s rigid stance. It had dawned on him she was trying with every ounce of strength to stay aloof, but he saw in her eyes, she was losing ground. Maybe God had found a way to intercede.
Connor longed to hear her admit she was at fault for their breakup and not him.

Remorse struck Connor without warning. He’d talked with her about Caitlin’s admiration of her and the possible effect. Could she be protecting Caitlin as much as herself? The question wavered in his thoughts.

Connor left and headed to the house. He’d have to work out sleeping arrangements. He could give Ellene his bed, let Aunt Phyllis sleep with Caitlin, and he’d have the sofa. Connor pictured his lengthy frame scrunched on the sofa, and for the first time since the storm, he hoped the ferry service reopened soon.

Ellene put away the dinner dishes and occasionally glanced at Caitlin, whose nose was pressed against the windowpane.

“It’s still snowing,” Caitlin said, her voice beginning to sound whiny. Ellene had come to know that tone and longed to find a better way for the child to express her wants.

Ellene weighed what she knew. Anticipating Caitlin’s desires might be a boon to solving the problem. If Caitlin realized people understood her wishes, the child might learn that she only needed to express what she wanted without whining.

“Does that mean you’d like to play in the snow?”

Caitlin did a slow turn. “To make a snowman.”

“It’s too cold,” Connor said, reaching for the TV remote to change the station.

Ellene gave Caitlin a wink and wandered to Connor’s side. She sat on the sofa arm to get his attention. It worked.

“It is cold,” he repeated.

Ellene lowered her voice. “I know, but she’s been so good and cooped up for the past few days. She needs to burn some energy. I’ll go out with her.”

Connor’s eyebrows raised. “You?”

“Me, if I can find something for my feet.” She turned toward Aunt Phyllis and raised her voice. “What size are your boots?”

“Mine?”