In Search of Lucy (23 page)

“Katie!” Lucy struggled to get the words out.
I have to get to Katie,
she thought to herself. In her hospital gown, she wandered down the hallway. Her bare feet skidded along the tile as her stride got progressively faster. “Where are you?” Lucy’s sense of urgency grew to the point that she was almost running, searching through each doorway she went by. Suddenly she felt the tile beneath her feet transform into carpet, and her surroundings had changed too.
Where am I?
Seconds later she recognized that she was back at Katie’s house. It seemed impossible. Then she heard a girl’s voice.

“Lucy. Come here.”

She tried to follow the familiar voice that sounded like it was coming from the back of the house. Heading down the hall, she tried to get a grasp on what was happening and why she felt so afraid.

“Lucy, look what I’ve done.” The girl sounded happy and proud.

Standing in the doorway now, staring at the little girl in the beautiful dress, she said, “Katie?” A wave of relief washed away the fear. It was so wonderful to see her sister again after all these years. She wanted to hold her and tell her that no matter what she would take care of her. This must be their second chance. To do it all over again, but this time they would stick together.

“No, Aunt Lucy, it’s me Carly. Come see the picture I painted.”

“Carly?” Slowly she walked into the room and toward the girl.
What is happening?
Lucy had been so focused on the girl that she hadn’t noticed the painting at first. Suddenly she had a bad feeling about it. She did not want to see what was painted on the other side of that canvas. It was coming back to her now. The dress. The painting. It was Linda. Just like before. Her mother was back in their lives, and now she would hurt Carly just like she’d hurt Lucy and Katie.

“It’s someone I love very much!” Carly smiled and sat up tall as Lucy came to stand by her side. She grabbed one of Lucy’s hands and pressed it against her cheek. “It’s you, Aunt Lucy. You saved my mommy, and I love you very much.” Her words faded quickly, but Lucy could still feel the soft skin against her hand, caressing it over and over.

“What?” Rita exchanged a puzzled look with Rick, who shrugged and waited for Katie to continue.

“I have to see my sister, right now. She needs me…she needs to hear my voice. And I need your help to get over there, Rita.”

“Listen, honey, I know you’re worried about Lucy, but the only place you’re going today is the intermediate care unit.”

Rick didn’t say a word, and Katie could tell that Rita was not taking her seriously. As Rita looked over Katie’s chart, she started pushing back her covers as if attempting to get out of bed. Her body ached and felt incredibly weak, so she hoped that Rita would not call her bluff. “You two aren’t getting this, are you?” She clasped a hand across Rick’s wrist like she was slapping on handcuffs. “Help me up.”

Rick released the resistance in his arm so she couldn’t get any leverage. “Babe, you can’t get up. Rita please, help me.”

“All right, missy,” Rita said. She headed over to the bed. “Just relax a minute and we’ll talk about this.”

Rick got up from the bed and let Rita take over. The two had become close over the years, and Rita had been such a blessing for them. There were so many times when Katie was in the hospital and needed someone, a mother, to talk to or simply just be there and hold her hand. Rita had done all that and more.

Katie collapsed back against the bed, thankful she didn’t have to get up. “Rita, how many stories have you told me about the healing power of love and family?” Rita nodded her head in agreement. “You always say it’s more than just medicine. Remember the time when you told Mr. Simmons’s granddaughter to go sing to him?”

“I do, but she wasn’t in ICU,” she said, looking down on Katie with a slight attitude. “You know what else I remember? How ’bout the time when you begged me to let Carly stay after hours to watch a movie with you and she spilled popcorn all over the floor? You are just trying to get my ass in trouble, aren’t you?” She didn’t wait for an answer, but instead turned to Rick. “And you, just standing there not saying a word.”

Rick knew from experience when not to argue with Katie. She rarely wanted or asked for anything, so when she did, Rick made it happen. He shrugged and then smiled at Katie, which meant he was on board. He walked closer to the bed and looked over at Rita. “Well, are you going to make this girl portable or what?”

Rolling her eyes to the sky, Rita let out a sigh and a “God help us.” Then, after some thought and debate on the best way to get Katie out the door and down one hallway, the three of them were on their way. Since Katie was able to sit up, Rick lifted her into a wheelchair while Rita removed the few monitors that she could, knowing it would only be for a short time.

Luckily it was still early, so the halls were pretty clear. On the way, they passed one nurse who stared, but she didn’t dare question them. Rita was a master at throwing her weight around there, and all it took was a look to let someone know to back off. At the door, she ordered Rick in with Katie while she stood guard outside.

After pushing the chair as close as possible, then helping Katie scoot even closer, Rick took a long, hard look at the woman who had saved his wife’s life. She looked so peaceful you’d have thought she was just taking a nap.

“You okay, babe?” Rick asked. He bent over and put his arm around Katie.

A flood of emotions filled her heart, while her eyes filled with tears. It wasn’t just sadness or fear. The reality of the whole situation finally hit her seeing Lucy lying there in the bed. “I guess I never realized before now how much Lucy has done for me.” She took hold of her sister’s hand. “Everything we’ve been through has been harder on her. Every tough situation she’s had to deal with was because of me.”

Whether that was entirely true or not, Rick didn’t interrupt. Katie was not talking to him. She was looking at Lucy. Talking to her.

“Lucy…I know you can hear me. And I know things have been really hard for you. But I’m here now. And I’ll be here for you, just like you always were for me. Just please don’t leave me. Not now.” Katie sat there quietly for a moment, softly rubbing Lucy’s hand over and over.

“I’m sorry, Katie, but you have to go now,” Rita said, opening the door.

“Can’t I have a few more minutes?” she pleaded.

“I’m afraid your time’s up, Mrs. Moore,” an older-looking doctor said, walking in behind Rita.

Rick and Katie both recognized him, but neither remembered his name. Taken by surprise, Rick stuttered and tried to say something that didn’t make them sound like they’d just gotten caught ditching. “Hi…uh…are you here to examine Lucy? My wife and I are really concerned about her.”

“I’m sure you are, Mr. Moore, but you’ll have to take your wife back to her room now. I’ll let you know as soon as I’m done here.” Rita disappeared from the room as the doctor stood near the door, arms folded.

Katie acted like she wasn’t even listening. She was still looking at Lucy and caressing her hand. Rick walked over to her and said quietly, “C’mon, babe.” He didn’t want to pull her away until he was sure that she was aware of what was happening, but Katie wouldn’t let go of Lucy’s hand.

“I love you, Lucy,” Katie said as Rick started to ease her back into the chair. But just as her hand began to slip away from Lucy’s, she thought she felt her move. “Wait…Rick, wait.”

Rick stopped and knelt beside Katie’s chair. “What’s wrong?”

“I felt something. I think she heard me and is waking up.” Gaining a better grip once again, Katie held Lucy’s hand and waited. “Oh my God, she squeezed my hand. I felt it.” She turned to see where the doctor was. “Doctor! Please come over here.”

A low moan filtered out of Lucy and became audible to both Rick and Katie, as the doctor came to the other side of the bed. Then she started to turn her head from side to side. Katie smiled at her husband excitedly. Lucy’s eyelids fluttered and opened halfway. Appearing in the doorway as magically as she’d disappeared, Rita walked in and joined the others. She read the doctor’s expression to mean that she should get them out of the way so he could properly examine Lucy.

“Well, Miss Katie, it looks like you did it.” She gave Katie a quick squeeze on the shoulders and then grabbed ahold of the wheelchair handles. “Now we need to let the doctors take over.”

Just as she was backing the chair away from the bed, Lucy began to speak and a faint sound came out. “Katie.” She managed a tiny grin and added, “I heard you.”

“Can you believe that?” Rick said back in Katie’s room. They were now being joined by George and Carly, who had just arrived there to visit Katie and hear about the whole story.

“That’s amazing,” George replied. “So it looks like everything’s going to work out just fine.”

“Well, the doctor is still examining her, but I just know she’s going to be fine.” Katie smiled and laughed, thinking of Rita. On the walk back to the room, she jokingly scolded Katie for making her break the rules. Then she let her off the hook by saying, “Don’t worry, I ain’t afraid of that old goat. I’ve been at this hospital way too long to let those arrogant doctors scare me.” Rita had often confided in Katie about how underappreciated nurses felt sometimes. She was a hardworking, dedicated professional, but there were times when Rita was the one in charge and the doctors complied.

Carly had been listening so intently to the details of Lucy’s situation and how everything unfolded. She was holding a large white paper that was thick like a poster board. “Mommy, when can I see Aunt Lucy? I have a present for her.”

“Soon, baby girl.”

Then Rick added, “I’m sure there are lots of people who want to visit with Aunt Lucy, so you’ll have to be patient.”

“But Daddy, I have to give her my present.” Dragging the paper by her side, she ran to her dad. “I worked on it all day yesterday with Papa. See?”

Rick took it in both hands, held it up, and examined it. “It’s very beautiful!” Even though it was obviously a painting of a woman, Rick didn’t want to assume who it was. Oftentimes—mainly when she was younger—Carly would get upset because her parents couldn’t quite make out what her artwork was supposed to be. “
She’s
very beautiful.”

“Doesn’t it look just like her?” Carly tilted her head to the side waiting for confirmation.

“It sure does,” Rick answered with a pang of guilt. He glanced at Katie for sympathy while George just shook his head and laughed.

“Papa thought it looked just like Lucy too.”

Rick laughed in relief, and then the others joined him and doted on their talented artist.

Lucy didn’t mind at all feeling like her room was Grand Central Station. After Rick and Katie left and the doctor checked her out, she was left to rest for a while until another nurse came back and worked on her some more. Then it was finally time for visitors.

Totally awake and feeling somewhat refreshed, she smiled and listened to each person’s story of worry and hope. It made her laugh how Anne talked up the drama and gave her the play-by-play of last night’s ordeal in the waiting room. She told her how Benny had been waiting by his phone for Anne to give him some news.

“I really appreciate you all hanging in there for me,” Lucy said quietly.

“What are you talking about, Lucy? We love you. Don’t you know that?” Anne put her hand on Lucy’s and gave her an endearing smile.

For the first time, Lucy really took in that smile. She had seen it a hundred times but never really accepted it as something offered to her in friendship. She just figured that was the way Anne was. And she was right. But that particular smile was also Anne’s way of telling Lucy she was her friend no matter what. “I guess I’m finally starting to realize that now. You have been so great to me, and I’ve just been a pain in the ass.”

“True,” Ann laughed. “But that’s what friends are for. Soon it will be my turn to be a pain.”

“And I’m going to be there for you, just like you’ve been there for me.”

The girls hugged, and then Anne tried to lighten the mood by giving her the scoop on a good-looking intern she had been flirting with that morning. She wondered if that was Anne’s plan all along, to keep Lucy in a good mood for the person who would come next to visit. For a few minutes after Anne left, Linda popped her head in the doorway.

“I know I’m probably the last person you want to see right now.”

“It’s okay, come in.” Lucy knew it was inevitable and just wanted to get it over with. She wasn’t about to get upset now.

Linda walked in timidly and sat in a chair teetering on the edge of it. She was holding a large manila envelope and set it down on a small table next to the bed. “I’m not here to upset you, Lucy. I just want to say a few things and then I’ll leave. In fact…” Linda looked away to avoid eye contact, “…you don’t have to see me ever again.”

Okay, so what was Lucy supposed to say to that one? So she just waited.

“Lucy, the only reason I came was to make sure you and your sister were okay. You probably won’t believe me, but I’m trying to turn things around for myself. I know I can’t do anything for you, make anything up to you, until I get help.” Linda looked straight at her daughter now. “I just wanted to tell you that before I go.”

Linda appeared relieved that Lucy let her say her piece. Before she left, she told Lucy she was staying with a friend in San Diego and had entered an AA program there. She promised to be in touch and left her information even though she knew she wouldn’t hear from Lucy anytime soon.

When Lucy hinted at being exhausted, Linda headed for the door.

“Wait,” Lucy said, stopping her just short of the door. “You forgot your envelope.” She pointed at it still resting on the table, even though she was starting to feel weak and just wanted her to leave.

Linda smiled and replied, “That’s for you, sweetheart.”

“What is it?”

“Answers,” was all she said.

Seeing her mother left her drained and wanting to rest, but she fought the urge to fall asleep. She couldn’t help but wonder if this time Linda really would turn her life around. Did it really matter at that point?
Yes, it did,
she thought to herself. Linda was at least trying to heal herself. And Katie—she was trying to heal herself. Everyone around her seemed to be living life and moving forward while she had been stuck in the past. There was no one forcing her to stay there. Nobody was keeping her from moving on—nobody but herself.

“My God!” she said aloud to herself. “I’m alive and I need to start living.” She couldn’t believe that it took risking her life to realize how important it actually was to her. There were so many people surrounding her…supporting her…and loving her. It would take some time, but Lucy was certain that no matter what she would find her own purpose again. But until then, she would rely on those around her to get her through, day by day.

Lucy’s last visitor of the day was the one she most wanted to see. The one she had been waiting for. Where had he been, and why hadn’t he come in yet? She faded in and out of sleep, anticipating his arrival. Her body had an eerie pain that was somehow comforting. It represented a new bond she would share with her sister, and the start of her new life. A few times she would drift off, and then snap awake to the sound of what she thought was someone in the room. She found herself staring over at the envelope Linda had left. Although she was curious, it was not a major concern for her. Another time she fell asleep and awoke to a hazy vision of a nurse doing something at her bedside. Whatever it was it didn’t matter, and she went back to sleep. The next time she opened her eyes, she felt weight on the bed and something stroked her cheek.

“Hello there, beautiful.” Kyle was smiling down on Lucy, inches from her face. He looked different than she remembered. He had a pretty good five-o’clock shadow, and his hair was disheveled. Definitely not the image that Kyle had previously portrayed to her. She liked it though. It seemed so real, so natural.

“Hi.” She touched him to see if he was real. Maybe this whole thing was just a dream. “Where were you?”

“You gave everyone such a scare, and they were so worried. I thought they needed to see you first.”

“That was nice of you, but weren’t you worried?”

“Not really. I knew you’d be fine. Plus, I figured you’d want to save the best for last.”

There was the Kyle she remembered, bursting with confidence. “Yes, I did.” In her heart she knew he was right. Kyle was the best. He was the best thing that had ever happened to her, and she had only the best things to look forward to. Because that is what she would do from now on—look forward.