With a low growl, he claimed my lips, his strong hands sliding through my hair. He cupped my head as he drew me closer, deepening the kiss. Passion and heat swirled within me when his tongue parted my lips and stroked my own. I ached to wrap myself around him, holding him there indefinitely. Our lips finally parted, albeit reluctantly, leaving me breathless and greedy for more.
“Drive safe,” I said in a panting whisper, my pulse racing.
“I always do,” he answered, hands still cradling my head. He pulled me in for one final kiss: a single, delicious peck that left a lasting tingle over my swollen lips. With that, he was walking away, heading out into the frosty morning.
I stood in the foyer, my skin buzzing and panties soaked, unsure what to do with the rest of my day. A run was the first thing that came to mind. It had been three days since my last one, and I needed the fresh air as badly as I needed more of Logan’s touch.
By the time I was halfway up the stairs to dress in warmer clothes, the doorbell was ringing. I halted my step and waited to see if Jax would answer it, but another ring of the bell told me that wasn’t happening. It appeared I was alone, though I hadn’t heard him leave.
The bell continued almost incessantly until I reached the door and yanked it open in a huff of annoyance, expecting to find some punk friend of Jax’s.
Instead, there stood Hilary. Redness rimmed her fury-filled eyes, dark bags underneath them. She looked exhausted, but I knew that wasn’t all she was feeling when she stormed past me and blew out a sigh.
“Well,
hello
!” she bit out, unwrapping the thick black scarf from her neck.
I scrunched my brow, ignoring the barb in her tone. “Why aren’t you at school? It starts in, like…” I scanned the room for a clock.
Her eyes bulged. “Are you serious right now?”
To say I’d been avoiding her wasn’t entirely true—I was simply unconsciously avoiding everyone outside the West household. I’d seen Logan pack my phone before he brought me to his house, but I’d never felt like charging it. Instead, it sat in the small pocket inside my duffle. I knew there’d be consequences, but the peace I’d experienced the previous day was worth it.
So worth it.
Slowly, I brought my attention back to her, watching as she paced. A pang of guilt hit me when I took in the paleness of her usually bright complexion. Now I was the one at a loss of what to say, so it was best to settle in and let her get it out. I knew her well enough to know I was in for it, but was somewhat surprised to see she looked almost unsure of where to start her rant.
Hilary stalked toward me with slow, determined steps. “Do you know how many times I called you, huh? It’s been
three
days, and I haven’t heard a word from you!”
Yeah, I’m in trouble.
“I’m
sorry. I figured you’d know I was here, or—”
“Or what—assume you decided to skip town? Or worse, were hiding out somewhere alone, needing me?” Her voice and head both dropped with the last two words. She was hurting, and had the tables been turned I would’ve been going out of my mind as well.
“Damn it, Cassandra.” She looked up, glossy-eyed. “I’ve been so worried.”
“I’m sorry, really. I guess I figured you’d call Logan. Caleb has his number.”
She rolled her eyes. “That’s not the point. But yes, Caleb called Logan. I damn well insisted.”
Relieved I hadn’t caused too much anxiety for a pregnant woman, I replied, “So you knew I was safe.”
“I knew you were
alive
.” She threw her hands in the air, getting worked up again. “If not for Logan forcing Caleb to keep me away for a couple days, I’d have come busting through that door the second I heard.”
I smiled to myself. “Logan just wanted me to rest.”
“I know.” She relaxed, her shoulders sagging as she stood in front of me. “I was just hoping you’d do so after calling your best friend and telling her you’re all right.”
Before I could reply, her arms were around me. She dragged me in for a hug, her anger a thing of the past.
She pulled back, tears glistening in her eyes. “I’m sorry for freaking out. I can’t even imagine what you’re going through. Tell me what I can do—anything.”
“Honestly?”
She nodded.
“You can go to school. The last thing you need to be doing is missing a day of work—you’ll be missing plenty I’m sure once the morning sickness hits. You’ve never been good at handling yourself sick.” I smiled, relieved to see her shoulders deflate further.
“I can handle myself just fine,” she retorted, holding back a smile. “And I wouldn’t be late if I didn’t have to wait forever for Logan to leave. He’ll be lucky if Oliver makes it on time.”
“You waited for him to leave?”
“Yeah, I sat in your driveway next door. Didn’t want him standing over us, trying to convince me to leave.”
Where did
that
come from?
“He wouldn’t. He knows I’m feeling better—and don’t try to change the subject. How are you feeling? You’re already such a baby when you’re sick, and now you’re having one.” I laughed wholeheartedly, basking in the comfort I felt from teasing her. “It’s a good thing I got plenty of rest. It’s going to be a long nine months.”
“Funny.” Hilary turned her attention to the foyer, surveying the area before walking toward the living room. “Your man has some good taste.” She stared up at the massive painting of Oliver as a toddler playing with wooden blocks, which hung in the center of the room. “And a seriously cute kid.” She turned back to me. “You make the perfect addition.”
Addition?
“Meaning?”
She slouched down in the leather chair. “I’m just saying—you fit in here.”
“Hardly,” I scoffed. “This house is not me.”
“Maybe not yet, but I know you, and I was the one getting an earful the other day from a man crazy in love—a man that wasn’t going to let anything happen to you. It’s inevitable—before you know it, your painting will hang on one of these walls.” An abrupt giggle caught in her throat. “I’m guessing the first will be hanging in the bedroom: a scandalous nude.”
I rolled my eyes and sat across from her. Was this my future? My relationship with Logan was technically new, but with everything we’d been through, it felt like I’d known him forever. I couldn’t recall a time when he wasn’t in my life, and I didn’t want to. And Oliver…I didn’t want to confuse him.
My thoughts were interrupted.
“So has he…you know…” Her brows rose suggestively.
“No, I
don’t
know.”
What is she getting at now?
She released a disappointed breath. “Has he painted you? Caleb said models hire him. I mean, I think....I don't know.” Her brows pinched together, her features sympathetic and her words rushed as she tried to back pedal the subject. "Forget I said anything."
“No, he hasn’t painted me,” I said, ignoring the burn of jealousy. A grin covered my lips as I added, “Yet.”
She relaxed. “I don’t know why I even brought it up.” Crossing her leg over her knee, she tried to grab my attention again, which was fighting the pull to drown in thoughts of Logan surrounded by beautiful supermodels. He’d better not have kept those paintings.
Logan loves me, supermodel or not,
I reminded myself, brushing off my silliness.
“So how long are you staying here?”
I sat up in my seat. “Going home tomorrow. Do you want something to drink?”
“No, you’re right, I better get to school. I just needed to know you were okay.” She stood and fastened the top button of her coat—one she’d hidden in the back of her closet when her mother bought it a few years earlier, claiming it was too bulky. It was too early for her to have a bump, so why was she trying to cover up?
“Have you told Caleb yet?”
She shook her head. “I’ve only known a week. I need more time.” She pulled her gloves out of her pocket and focused on them instead of my inquisitive stare. “Call me when you get settled back home and I’ll come over. We can do a girls’ night.”
Oh no, she isn’t going to avoid this
. “You need time to what?”
She sighed, dropping her head. “I don’t know…to think. Let’s not worry about it right now. After everything you’ve been through, we shouldn’t even be talking about my issues.”
“No, I want to talk about it. Tell me, what is there to thin—”
My words fell away at the sudden, somber drop of her expression.
“I better go.” She tightened her scarf back around her neck and headed toward the door.
“Wait! Hilary, I’m serious, we need to talk about this. I know you’re nervous, but making a rash decision isn’t—”
“I can’t be a mom, all right!? Not yet, anyway. That’s what
you
always wanted.” Her shoulders fell as she blew out a breath of air. “Damn it, Cass, let’s not do this right now.”
“Sit down,” I ordered curtly. “If you want to know what you can do to help me, you can talk to me, because right now you’re all I’m concerned about.”
Slowly, she moved back to the sofa and sat. “There’s the Cassandra I’ve been missing,” she mumbled with a small smile.
“Talk,” I prompted, sitting beside her.
“You know I love Caleb and I always dreamed one day I’d make him mine, but beyond that…I never gave it any thought. Dumb, I know, but I just want to have some fun with him before we settle down with kids and responsibility.”
“You’re going to make a wonderful mother.” I placed my hands on hers and squeezed gently. “Look at me. I’ll be here—anything you need, I’ll be here to help, so please don’t do what you’re thinking of doing.”
“I would never. I thought about it, but I can’t.” Her gaze fell to her stomach, where she placed her hand. “It’s a little Caleb in there.” A smile touched her lips as she looked up, but it was brief. Her next words flew out in one rapid breath. “Adoption is the only way. I have to wait till I’m beginning to show, then leave. I have family up north I can visit till the birth, then—”
“Whoa whoa whoa! Hold up!” I shot out. Was she serious? “You can’t just disappear for six months and expect no one to ask questions—for Caleb not to ask. This isn’t 1950! Are you insane? This is the real world. You have a job, and…” I shook my head, flabbergasted we were having such an outlandish conversation. She couldn’t leave. She couldn’t just give up the baby without telling Caleb. That wasn’t even legal.
I stood, needing space to comprehend.
“You’re my friend, Cassandra—my best friend. I need you to keep this secret.”
“What?” I breathed out. She was serious.
Holy crap! How do I talk her out of this?
“I talked to my aunt in Toronto. She said she knows the landlord of a small loft apartment on her block, and the rent is cheap. I’ll get a job there, and before you know it I’ll be back. Everything will be normal again.”
My head was spinning, tears burning my eyes. “Hilary.” I had so many words to say, but no way to get them out. I was shocked silent. All I could muster was a lifeless, “Don’t.”
“I have to.”
“No, you
have
to talk to Caleb. Let him be there for you.”
“Right, like you let Logan be there for you?”
That hit low and hard.
“That was different.”
“Really? ’Cause I remember seeing you hurt and scared, a guy who loved you and wanted nothing but to work his ass off for your forgiveness, and you treating him like shit!”
My mouth fell open. “What? That was…he hurt me.”
“And he apologized again and again! Do you know how many nights he showed up at Caleb’s drunk out of his mind, with worry and regret over what he did to you? He would just sit there on Caleb’s couch staring at nothing in the dark until he passed out.”
Logan.
I wanted to hold him and comfort him more than ever, even though we’d already moved on from the past together.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I whispered, sadness overwhelming me.
“I couldn’t. You were so angry, and I understood that. You had a right to be. But Logan…he took everything you threw at him, and I stood by you each and every time. All I want is for you to do the same.”
“But Caleb hasn’t done a thing wrong.”
“I know, but I’m terrified of losing him, and of being a shit mother. I don’t want this. Not now. So please, either stand beside me and help, or stay out of it and keep your mouth shut. You owe me at least that much.”
The door was slamming behind her before I was able to speak.
What the hell just happened?
“I believe you just got put in your place.”
I turned and glared at Jax, who was wearing a smug grin.
“Didn’t think you were still here,” I said, irritated at too many things.
“Well, I am, and your friend…is she always that bitchy, or is it a pregnant thing?”
“She’s not… wait, you heard? Jax, you can’t tell anyone. Do you understand? Not even Logan.”
His eyes gleamed. “So you’re saying this is a secret?”
“Obviously.”
“A secret you’re keeping from my dear big brother.” He clicked his tongue in mock disapproval. “I’m not sure he’d appreciate me lying to him. I mean, he’s given me a place to stay, money in my pocket…” He let his words hang.
“What do you want?” I sighed, gathering my hair and twisting it in the back out of my way.
“Your help.”
“With?”
“Natasha.”
“Why? You hate her.”
“I do, but for the moment I need to appease her.”
“So let me see if I understand correctly: She has something on you, so you’re attempting to blackmail me?” I wanted to laugh at the ridiculousness.
“That about sums it up. I knew there was more than one reason Logan fell for you.”
With a disgusted grunt, I crossed my arms. “I’m not helping you with anything.” I brushed past him to exit the room, making my way toward the stairs.
“Just ask Logan to be nicer to her. That’s all I’m asking.”
“No. Why don’t
you
be nice to her?”
“I am!”
I reared back, gaping at him. “That was you being
nice
yesterday?”
“Sure was.” He flashed a cocky grin that spurred my irritation and had me moving again—faster.