Indisputable (22 page)

“I’ll see you in class, Sweetheart.”  Her eyes
widen infinitesimally at the familiar endearment, but other than that, she
gives nothing away.  She gives me a small shake of her head, but otherwise
doesn’t make eye contact as she walks towards Trey.  My heart clenches,
but I know this isn’t going to be easy.  Hopefully with my endearment on
her mind, she won’t think about trying anything with my best friend. 

With one last nod to my friend, I step outside into
the snowy cold.  Winter hit hard and early this week, and the air is
frigid and icy.  A fresh blanket of snow covers the ground, and the air
feels like a blizzard is coming.  I walk carefully across the icy parking
lot, trying not to slip as I make my way to my car.  Once inside I crank
the heat, buckle up, and make the call I’ve been dreading for months.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Mom.  It’s me.”

“Oh, my God.  Oh, my boy,” the woman on the other
end of the line cries, and my chest burns with guilt. 

It’s time to start tying up these loose ends.

Tatum

“Come on, honey, my office is right this way.” 

My body jolts at the sound of Trey’s smooth voice,
reminding me why I came here in the first place.  It wasn’t to see
Jacoby.  I actually hadn’t considered the possibility that he came to work
out in the mornings before school.  I guess when I spent all my evenings
at work, I assumed he used that time to catch up on his own personal
life.  Now, I feel like a huge moron. 

Oh God, he’s probably wondering what I’m doing with
Trey.  I don’t blame him, considering I’ve kissed his best friend. 
Except the whole reason I’m here won’t leave Jacoby much room to talk if Trey
confirms my suspicions.  If I was less of a coward I would have questioned
Jacoby myself, but I’m not.  I might as well have Scaredy Cat stamped on
my forehead.   

I follow Trey through the gym, down a brightly lit
hall of white cinderblock walls and gray linoleum floors until he stops outside
a locked door.  He opens it, holding it wide and using his arm to gesture
me inside.  As I pass, he smiles gently at me.  I don’t know if that’s
a good sign, or a bad one, so I give him a tired smile of my own.

“Thanks,” I say quietly. 

The room looks like, well, an office.  Four
windowless cinderblock walls painted white, bare of any pictures or
paintings.  A small wooden desk pushed up against the wall to the right of
the door way.  The desk holds a laptop, charger, a cup of pens, and a
small, messy stack of papers.  Beside the desk sits a black three drawer
filing cabinet, and across from it, on the opposite wall, are two padded
chairs.

“Have a seat, hon, and tell me what’s going on.” 
Trey rests his butt against the edge of his desk and leans back to brace
himself on his hands, gripping the edge. 

If I was a different girl, in a different world, I
could totally flirt with his position.  Situate myself between his thick,
muscled thighs, rest my hands against his tight pecs.  I wonder if there’s
a girl out there with his heart.  He has an abundance of sweetness and
charm, and I want that for him.  He deserves to have a good woman who’ll
look out for him.

When I finally perch against the edge of my seat, Trey
says, “You look so tired,” in the gentlest voice I’ve ever heard.  Tears
prick the corners of my eyes.  If I was foolish enough, I’d think he
really cared. 

“I’m okay,” I lie.  I’m not even close.  Especially
not after this morning.

“Talk to me.  What’s up?”

I blow out a deep breath.  “Okay, so I promise I
wasn’t doing anything I shouldn’t have been.  I just need to know the
truth.”  My gaze drops to study Trey’s black and white Nike’s while I
await his answer. 

“So…what do you need to know?”  When he speaks,
my eyes flicker to meet his, and I’m mildly surprised to see a hint of
suspicion there, along with concern.  Oh crap, this isn’t going to be
good.

“Well, Jacoby and I haven’t really been on speaking
terms in a while.”  Trey nods without losing eye contact, so I take a deep
breath and continue.  “Um, I really wanted to talk to him.  We kind
of left things…uncertain.”  Shit, why does this have to be so hard? 
Why does it feel like the room is shrinking, and I’m sweating even though I’m
in jeans and a light hoodie? 

I cough to clear my suddenly parched throat.

“It’s okay.  You can talk to me.  Don’t be
nervous, just tell me what happened so I can help you.”

Seriously, I really, really hope he has a good woman,
because he’s a really, really nice guy.

I nod and lace my fingers together to keep from
fidgeting.  Otherwise I’m going to tear the paper in my hands to
shreds.  “Okay, so this morning I wanted to talk to him, so I drove over
to his place.  And when I pulled up, this tall, blonde woman was getting
into her car.  I don’t think she saw me, because she just drove away, but
I’m positive she came from his house.  Anyway, I went to the door to see
if he was home, even though it really sucked to see another woman leaving his
place.”

My fingers tremble as I wipe away the wetness
gathering in the corner of my eye. 

“So, I open the screen door to knock, and this paper
falls to the ground.  I’m stupid and shouldn’t have looked at it, but
really, what would you do?” I finish, my voice shaking on the last few
words.  I’d give anything to feel unaffected if he’s seeing somebody else,
but give me a break, it freaking hurts. 

“Can I see the note?” Trey asks gently as he moves to
stand in front of me.  I don’t answer; instead I lift the paper between
us.  Trey grasps the note between his thumb and pointer finger, but
instead of taking it, he gives it a gentle shake to get my attention.  My
wet gaze finds his soft one, and I let out a small hiccup.

“Honey, listen to me.  I’m going to read this,
see if I can get the gist of what’s going on, but you do not need to cry. 
I know Jacoby, and that man is crazy over you.  This is all going to work
out, okay?” 

If he saw the model-esque blonde leaving Jacoby’s this
morning, I seriously doubt he’d be saying this to me.  But what do I
know?  They’ve been friends a lot longer than I’ve been in this screwy
picture.  Nodding my head, I release the paper and turn slightly in my
chair to study the blank wall while chewing on my thumbnail. 

When had I let my life get more complicated?  I
swore to myself after the drama from last year I would keep my head down and
finish school quietly.  I wanted nothing more than to get my degree and
save enough money to leave this town.  I feel like I failed myself. 
It’s not like I had set ridiculously high goals for myself, but by allowing
Jacoby into my life, it’s like I opened Pandora’s Box.

He made me feel things I never have before and didn’t
think I would until I was long gone from this town and living a normal
life.  My goals were always to save enough money and go to college. 
Make something of myself.  Maybe go to nursing school or become a
Paramedic.  I always thought somewhere in my late twenties or early
thirties I’d become serious about finding someone to settle down with.  I
was never deluded with images of prince charming or soulmates.  I just
wanted someone who made me laugh and made me happy.  Sure, he’d have
flaws, but as long as he loved me, I’d be doing okay.  

But even the greatest of cynics can’t deny there was
something serendipitous about our late night encounter on the side of an empty
highway.  From the moment I met him, Jacoby brought out emotions in me I
never knew existed.  He melted the cage surrounding my heart and brought
the greatest relief, even more powerful than my blade.  I haven’t hurt
myself in weeks.  He gave me the control I craved by giving me
freedom.  Freedom from fear, freedom from judgment, freedom to be
loved.   

In doing so, even if he’s already moved on, he’s given
me the freedom to fight for him.  For us. 

In coming here today, I knew there was a chance Trey
would confirm my suspicion.  But I also knew deep in my heart, I’d fight
for Jacoby either way.  Skinny, blonde bitch be damned.

“Fucking Melissa,” Trey swears harshly, pulling me
from my thoughts of a bitch smack down. 

“I’m sorry?”  Who’s Melissa?  The note
wasn’t signed.  I don’t take her familiarity as a good sign, and my hands
tremble in my lap.

“This is from Melissa.  She’s, uh, an ex.”

“His ex?”

Trey sighs, rubbing a hand over his short cropped
brown hair.  “How much do you know of Jacoby’s past?”

My cheeks flame at his question.  “Um, actually
not a lot.  I know he’s only lived here a couple years, but I don’t know
why.  We haven’t talked about him much.”  Now I feel stupid. 
What kind of person falls for a man they barely know?  Right, a desperate
one.  At this point, I feel like I should just keep my head buried in the
sand where it’s apparently been for the past two months.

“You two are a piece of work, you know that?” Trey
snaps sounding exasperated.  I feel myself becoming defensive at his tone,
and my spine straightens.

“It’s not like we haven’t had a lot of shit going
on.  So instead of being a jerk, you mind filling me in on what you know
so I can get to class?” 

Trey shakes his head.  “You know I can’t give you
anything Jacoby hasn’t given you himself.  I’m not that kind of
friend.”  I open my mouth to protest, but he holds up a large hand in my
face.  Suddenly, I have the urge to bite him for shoving his hand in my
face.  Bastard.

“Hold up, spitfire.  What I can tell you is
Melissa is out of her damn mind with this note.  She was in the picture
before you came along, and Jacoby cut her loose.  You have nothing to
worry about.”

“You mean to tell me she wasn’t ‘keeping his bed warm’
as she so lovingly put it the last two weeks?” I argue, dramatic air quotes and
all.  Sometimes, my immaturity really shines through.

Trey leans down, putting his hands on the armrests of
the chair, caging me in and getting in my face.  So close, I can see his
bright blue eyes have turned icy.  “No.  I’d swear on my soul that he
is d-o-n-e,
done
with that chick.  He has been since you walked
into his life, and he hasn’t even looked at another woman since.”

Whoa.

Holy shit.

“What am I doing, Trey,” I whisper.  “What are we
doing?”  He leans back without breaking eye contact and crosses his arms
over his huge chest.

“You’re avoiding the truth.  About yourselves,
about each other, about your relationship.  I’m just waiting for you both
to wake the fuck up and take a look around.  I don’t know how much more
it’ll take before you two see what’s right under your goddamned noses.”

“What are you talking about?”

Trey sighs, running his hand across his mouth. 
“I’m talking about how I’ve never known two people so obviously made for each
other except the two of you.  Quit trying to fight your battles alone and
learn to fight them together.”

“How can you say that?  You hardly know me.”

“Yeah, you’re right.  I don’t really know
you.  I’ve spent one night with you, but I’m a perceptive guy.  I
see
you, honey.  And Jacoby talks to me.  We’re tight as brothers. 
I don’t have to spend more time around the two of you to know what I know.”

I close my eyes tightly, trying to regulate my
breathing when it hits me what he’s saying.  A part of me feels like I
should feel betrayed but the more logical part of me feels relieved. 
Relieved I don’t have to relive my shameful story once again with the best
friend of the man I’m falling for.  Relieved that for once I have an
unattached person I’d trust to give me an objective, honest opinion.

“He told you, didn’t he?  You know about me?”

Trey takes a step closer and grabs my hand firmly
between his two.  “Yes, honey.  I know.  What you need to know
that it doesn’t change my opinion of you.  I’m awed by your strength and
bravery for everything you’ve been through.  And I know Jacoby is, too.”

Tears tickle my eyelashes, and I close my eyes again
to push them away.  His words touch me deeply, and I feel incredibly lucky
he’s been brought into my life.  “Thank you,” I whisper.  “I should
get going, but truly, thank you.”  With his grip still on my hand, Trey
pulls me from the chair and wraps me in a tight, protective hug. 

“No need to thank me.  That willpower lives
inside of
you
.  Don’t forget it.  Now get out of here and go
make things right between the two of you.  I’m sick of him moping around
like a little bitch.”

After the morning I’ve had, hell the last two weeks, I
didn’t think I’d be able to laugh for a very long time.  But there you go,
with a few choice words Trey proves me wrong.  I let out a soft giggle,
and he smiles at me with something close to pride in his gaze.  It’s in
this moment that I realize if I can save things between Jacoby and me, I’ll
also be gaining a loyal, protective friend in Trey.  For the first time in
weeks, my world looks just a little bit brighter.  

***

The building is the same, the smell of paper and
rubber and cleaning products inside it familiar; everything about the place
I’ve spent the last three and a half years furthering my education is
unchanged.  But somehow knowing I’m wandering down these halls in order to
reclaim the other half of my heart makes everything seem different.  For
the first time since I stepped foot inside these walls four years ago, it
doesn’t feel so lonely.  It might be because I’ve finally found the
control I’ve craved my entire life, and it doesn’t come from a sharp metal
blade.  It might be that I’m finally ready to fight like hell for
something I want more than my next breath.  Or maybe it’s the simple fact
that I know he’s here.  That alone has the vise grip of loneliness
loosening its hold.

My feet carry me down the familiar halls, and my heart
beats faster with each step.  I follow the stairs up to the second floor,
and as I round the landing, those steps falter.  I come to a complete halt
as my eyes come to rest on Jacoby standing outside his classroom.  He’s leaning
against the doorway with his hands tucked into the pockets of his gray slacks,
his chocolate eyes pinned to the spot where I stopped as though he were waiting
for me.