Infinite Risk (31 page)

His eyes swept me from top to bottom, obviously wondering why I'd thought so little of myself. “I'm glad you're not in that place anymore.”

Nodding, I added, “That said, there have been a few times when I've thought certain girls are really pretty and even wondered—”

“So … you
are
bi?”

I shook my head. “I think … I could probably be attracted to anyone, under the right circumstances and if our personalities are a good fit.”

The Harbinger came to mind. He usually presented as male, but he'd indicated that he could be female during one conversation. Since he didn't have mortal limits, he could be whatever he wanted or something entirely new. Yet my feelings wouldn't change, no matter what he looked like. It was the crazy, chaotic, yet tender heart that moved me.

My feelings … what
are
they?
I shied away from examining them, as it didn't matter. He'd gone, leaving me to face what lay ahead alone.

“Ah, that's pan. It's cool you realized it. But you're not the person I thought you were.”

It's mutual.
This was
not
the conversation I expected from Jake, who was deeper than I'd realized. When I first met him, I saw only a jock, but he definitely had layers.

“You too,” I said. “How come you're not at some pricey prep school?”

“My father thinks they're a waste of money. He's self-made, and he got where he is without paying for a fancy education. He says it's up to me to capitalize on opportunities and to learn what I need to master life on my own, if necessary.”

“Wow. He sounds hard-core.”

Jake sighed as we turned down the street the school was on. “Exhausting, more like. He's always traveling for work, and I get e-mail bulletins with sudden work assignments at the weirdest times. Like, he'll be in Dubai and decide I have to check on our properties in Phoenix, and never mind the time difference or the fact that I have school.”

“That sounds awful.”

“Most people only see the house and the car. Don't get me wrong, it's better to have money than not, but my life's definitely not my own.”

“What about your mom?” Honestly, I expected to hear that he was on stepmother number four, and she was only five years older than him.

“She travels with my dad, mostly. I had nannies when I was younger, but last year I convinced them I didn't need constant supervision.”

“Huh. Well, I bet a lot of people at school would like to swap lives so they can try your problems for a while.”

He smiled at that. “Sometimes I'd take that deal.”

The driver pulled up the semicircle in front of the school office, and Jake got out without waiting for the door to be opened. I didn't expect so many students to be out front, but since it was a bright morning, another happy smile from Dwyer, everyone was sprawled on the cement, faces turned to the sky like blossoming sunflowers. It also meant tons of witnesses to report on the fact that I'd arrived with Jake. The whispering started straightaway.

“Looks like your plan is working.” He plucked my grubby backpack from my shoulder and carried it inside along with his.

Hurrying after him, I tried to repo my stuff, but he didn't stop until he reached my locker. “I don't need a porter.”

“It's just one of the many services I provide.”

“Great line.” When I turned, Wade Tennant stood nearby. “I have a bone to pick with you, dude. I saw her first. I even sent her a damn rose on Valentine's. So I should've been first on deck. So why are
you
with her?”

“Because I have free will and get to choose?”

But Wade ignored me. I might be a butterfly on a pin for all the notice he took. Instead, he glared at Jake, like any of this made sense. God, would it kill him
not
to add my notch to his bedpost? If we were last people on earth, I'd choose a boulder instead of him as my life partner because at least it would be a good listener. But this bullshit was exactly what I wanted to avoid and part of why I'd offered to help Jake. Wade had a real entitlement problem, as I shouldn't need a guy's stamp on me to be left alone. My own
hell no
should be sufficient, and it pissed me off that it wasn't. Since Wade was a senior, he seemed to think Jake should just give way.

Like I'm not even a person.

“I'm not a moon rock,” I said loudly. “It doesn't matter who saw me first. There can be no dibsing on me, you get that? Now piss off.”

My voice attracted the attention of the passing counselor, whose eyes narrowed when he realized it was the grieving student. “Is everything all right, Chelsea?”

That name gave me a jolt since I'd gotten used to Nine. “Fine. Jake was about to walk me to class.”

Now I sound like Tanya.

But Jake took the cue I lobbed and escorted me without complaint. “That was … weird. I've only known Wade a few months, but I've never seen him so single-minded. Usually he's fairly laid-back, part of his charm.”

Wedderburn.
A little shimmer of horror went through me. He'd driven Tanya to be uncharacteristically cruel and then to kill herself, so maybe he was twisting Wade's normal conquering instincts into something more sinister. Maybe I was overreacting, but it was hard not to hear the winter king whisper,
I'll have you raped and killed.

Concerned, Jake touched my shoulder. “Don't let him get to you.”

Easier said than done, maybe.
But I'd be vigilant.

So I spent the day dodging Wade and stuck with the crowd as we left school in the afternoon. In his basketball clothes, Jake walked me out, ever the attentive fake boyfriend. He paused on the front steps, smiling down at me.

“This is as far as I can take you.”

“Look out!” someone yelled from the parking lot.

Jake reacted with an athlete's reflexes and yanked me away, back toward the building, and where we had been standing, two huge cement blocks smashed to the ground. My breath wheezed in my lungs, starting another wave of phantom pain. He didn't let go of me, probably because I shook so hard, gritting my teeth against the anguish, that I would've fallen down. Fortunately, he took the episode for sheer terror, so he rubbed my back and told me I was okay.

“What the hell are they doing on the roof?” A teacher whose name I didn't know sent someone to check it out.

Kian arrived a few seconds later, his face pale. “Are you all right? What happened?”

Jake filled him in while I tried not to bite my tongue. My fingers glowed gold again, so I hid them in Jake's practice shirt, tangling in the fabric like I couldn't get close enough to him. He was big and protective for sure, and I wished I could thank him for taking the focus off my near incapacitation. From what I gathered, strong emotions made things worse. So fear, anger, passion—all of that needed to stop. I'd last longer if I remained calm.

The principal came out a few minutes later. By then I'd settled enough to give my version of events. He listened with a worried frown.
Probably afraid I'll sue.

“I'm truly sorry, Miss Brooks. I'll personally oversee the investigation and ferret out the responsible culprits. If this was meant as a prank, it is spectacularly unfunny.”

“It's okay. Jake has fast hands.”

“That's what she said,” a guy called from behind us.

The principal fixed a stern look on him and then turned back to me. “I'll be happy to chat with your parents and give them my personal assurance regarding your safety.”

Oh, shit.

“They're pretty busy,” I mumbled.

“I'm sure they'll make time when they learn how serious this could've been.”

Time for some scare tactics.
I lowered my voice. “Actually I wasn't planning on telling them. Having two attorneys in the family sucks sometimes. They tend to be … litigious.”

The wheels started turning in the principal's head, and I could see him mentally listing potential lawsuits. “Well, if you think that's best. But my office door remains open anytime.”

Jake waited until the crowd dispersed somewhat before calling me on my bullshit. “I thought you'd hadn't seen them in a while.”

To borrow a word from Selena … “Duh. Don't you need to get to practice?”

“I'll be late. Coach will make me run twenty laps. Big deal.”

“Are you sure?” If my muscles didn't feel like cooked spaghetti, I probably would dismiss him. This was getting a little too close to a real relationship.

“Definitely. People would think I was an asshole if I abandoned you that fast.”

Right. And we're trying to fix his reputation.

Just beyond, the janitor piled broken cement fragments into a rusty wheelbarrow. From his expression, he'd like to go upside the head of whoever created the mess. Since there was no blood, people lost interest and went about their business. Jake wrapped an arm around my shoulders and led me to a bench just inside the front doors.

“Thanks,” I said.

“No problem. Let me get you a coffee from the vending machine. How do you take it?'

“I didn't know we had one.” I'd seen the soda ones, of course.

“It's in the teacher's lounge, but there won't be anyone in there right now. Teachers are either bugging out for the day or in the clubs they sponsor.”

“Then light and sweet please.” The sugar might help, even if I didn't taste it.

“Be right back.”

True to his word, he appeared with a small cup of hot liquid that might well be horrible. I drank it all while he sat beside me. I got up and threw it away, enjoying the energy rush. “Seriously, I'm fine now. Go be an athletic star.”

“Okay.” He dropped a casual kiss on my forehead, and while I wasn't in love with him, it was easy to pretend he actually cared—that this wasn't part of the show.

“That was crazy,” Kian said.

For maybe the first time ever, I hadn't noticed him hovering nearby.
Does that mean I'm getting over him?
Now he stepped away from the wall and came toward me, radiating muted concern. I nodded as we headed to the bus stop together.
The universe is officially trying to kill me.
Did that mean it wasn't safe for me to ride public transportation? But that accident would've only injured me, so I guessed I didn't have to worry about massive disasters. That would be like nuking a roach from space.

As we reached the stop, he said, “Word is, there was no construction going on today, so it must've been students.”

“How do you know?”

“While you were making Jeffers stand down, I asked around. Did you piss someone off?”

Wryly, I shrugged. “Hard to say, but all signs point to yes.”

“This isn't funny, Nine. If you know who it is, speak up. You nearly died today.” He scowled until the bus came, refusing to talk to me.

I followed him on board and sat next to him, despite the backpack he put in my way. “Don't be mad. I really don't know. Maybe it was people who think dropping rocks off overpasses is fun.”

“Idiots,” he muttered.

There was no way I could tell the truth.
Nobody did it. The world is trying to murder me.
Just picturing how that conversation would go made me shake my head. Kian caught the movement in his peripheral vision, and he touched my arm, his demeanor softening.

“Sorry. I'm not upset with you. Honestly, I'm pissed that someone tried to hurt you and I can't do anything about it.”

I leaned my head against his shoulder, friend-style. “It's enough that you want to.”

“Sure, and Jake gets to be your hero.”

On some level, it seemed like Jake and me bothered him more than Colin had.
I wonder why.
So I asked.

Kian sighed. “I wish I knew.”

“You don't like Jake?” That probably wasn't the reason, but I chose not to encourage any sparks of latent attraction. Obviously, we were good together, but not in this world.

It can't happen,
I told him silently.
Sorry.
But part of me exulted over the fact that on some level, he sensed that maybe we
should
be together. That had to be hellaciously confusing.

“It's not that. Never mind. I'm probably just being sensitive.”

That's part of what of what I loved about you. Time to change the subject.

“I didn't see Vonna today. Is she okay?”

“Sore throat. She messaged me this morning. Would it be weird to show up with lozenges and soothing tea?”

Somehow I'd become his relationship coach.
I can live with that.
Considering, I shook my head. “But text first. I know you want to surprise her, but she might prefer not to see you if she's feeling puny. People are cranky when they're sick, so your good intentions might get lost.”

“Good idea,” he said, already typing on his phone. He let me read over his shoulder as the chat happened, and it was incredibly cute.

Kian:
Missed U today. Feeling any better?

Vonna:
A little. Miss U 2. Will try to make it tmrw.

Kian:
Want a care package later?

Vonna:
Ur sweet. Y, if U want.

At that point, I stopped reading. Apparently, she was okay seeing him now. Maybe it wasn't a big deal to her, but it seemed like one to me. This was such a contrast to the time we rode the bus together and listened to his music, sharing his earbuds. Once he finished, he showed me a picture he'd taken of Vonna when she wasn't looking. The camera on his phone was shitty compared the ones I'd left behind, and selfies weren't a thing yet.

“Isn't she pretty?”

“Definitely,” I said.