Authors: Shauna Allen
Difficult and uncooperative? What the hell? “Uh, Mike, I’m not sure what pipe you’re smoking from, but I have no idea what you’re talking about!”
Kaboom!
Jed would’ve sworn there was a violent roll of thunder. But just as quickly as it rattled his desk, it was gone and he couldn’t be sure if it was just his imagination.
“There!” Mike pointed a meaty finger at the framed sketch of the woman behind his desk. “Who is that?”
Jed peered over his shoulder. “A woman under a cherry tree.”
“No!” Michael boomed. “
Who
is that?”
Jed didn’t know what to say. She’d been nameless and faceless since he’d drawn her all those weeks ago, too far away to identify. Too far away to hold.
“Who is she?” Michael asked again, gentler this time.
“I don’t know,” he finally said.
“Of course you do. It’s
her.
Your
one.
Your soulmate.” He crossed his arms and tilted his head. “Father gave you that drawing, you know.”
This whole conversation was just too ridiculous to begin to question it. Jed didn’t know where to start.
“
I
know who it is,” Michael continued. “
Father
knows who it is.
You
know who it is, if you’d just admit it.” He pointed to the girl. “Who. Is. She?”
Jed’s heart began to race. He’d pushed her away all this time because of his own fears. He didn’t want her to rip open his heart like Kierstan had. Because she could do infinitely more damage.
He shook his head. “I don’t know if I can.”
“Of course you can.” He turned his eyes heavenward for a brief moment. “You know there’s power in saying things out loud sometimes.” He leaned forward, his shimmery aura following him. “Come on, Jedediah. Speak the truth. It’ll set you free.”
Jed glanced again at the sketch. Of course he knew who she was. It had been her all along.
“Who is she?” Michael asked again.
Jed turned and looked him in the eye. Maybe the truth would set him free. If not, what more could it hurt? He swallowed. “It’s Kyle, okay? It’s Kyle. And it kills me a little more every day.”
Mike smiled. “No reason it should kill you, my friend. She is your soulmate. Don’t you understand?” His brow furrowed as he seemed to remember something. “Now, you can still screw it up, so you need to decide what you want to do.”
“What I want to do?”
Mike slapped the top of his thigh in frustration. “You’re telling me we got this far and you’re not going to go to her? She’s leaving in a few hours!” His mouth formed a tight ‘O’ like he’d just divulged something he wasn’t supposed to.
In a few hours? Jed jumped up and headed to the door before he had another thought. He stopped when he saw Mike grinning as he rose from his seat. “Wait a minute,” he said. “Are you telling me the truth? Is she really leaving?”
Mike straightened. The strange white light was gone now, thank goodness. “I’m telling the truth. Would I lie?”
They walked out into the main floor of the studio together. It was still quiet and empty. It would be a couple of hours yet until clients started to show up. Jed looked around at the place he’d built, the dream he’d nurtured. It was finally going to be his one hundred percent. He wasn’t sure how to feel about that. So much heartache was tied to the studio since its inception with Kierstan, he’d have to find a way to cleanse it. He needed a fresh start.
Who knew, maybe he could find one with Kyle? Was there such a thing as ‘The One’ from God? He’d like to think so. He looked up into Michael’s earnest gaze and was somehow convinced. All the ugly things of the past seemed inconsequential.
He rubbed the koi fish that was wrapped around his arm and thought about what it symbolized, what it covered up.
“Hey, Mike?”
“Yeah?”
He took a deep breath and decided to take the biggest freefall of his life. “Would you do me a big favor, man?”
Mike smiled as though he already knew what Jed was going to ask. “Anything.”
Jed flew in his new Mustang down the interstate and into the parking lot of Kyle’s condo. He felt as though he was coming out of a fog, but all he could think about was getting to her. Mike had assured him he’d handle everything at the studio, but he had to hurry.
He skidded into a space at a haphazard angle and jumped out. He gimped toward the stairs, again wishing his leg was back to full strength. But, he reasoned as he lumbered up the steps, he’d take a hundred more breaks if it kept Kyle safe from injury again.
He gave her door a brisk knock. When she didn’t answer quick enough, he banged again. “Kyle!” he shouted, afraid he’d already missed her.
He wondered if he could catch her at the airport. Would Mike know which flight she was on?
Just as he raised his fist to bang again, the door flew open. She stared at him with wide, startled eyes. “Jed? What are you doing?”
He dropped his fist as his eyes drank her in. Her hair framed her face in wisps of blond that were cute as hell and she was obviously already dressed for bed in boy shorts and a yellow tank top. No bra. He averted his eyes back to hers. She’d gotten new glasses.
“Muffet,” he managed past his dry throat.
She cocked a hip against the door. “You don’t get to call me that anymore.” She looked down. “Your cast is off.”
He nodded.
“That’s good.”
God, he wanted to hold her. To kiss her. “Yup. Still aches sometimes and it’s not as strong as it was. I’m working on it.”
“What can I do for you, Jed? Surely you didn’t come all this way for small talk?” She closed the door fractionally. “Because if you did, I’ve got to get some sleep. It’s late and I’ve got a four a.m. flight.”
He held the door open with his palm. “Wait.”
“Wait? Wait for what?”
He reached out his other hand and cupped her cheek, brushing her skin with his thumb. Her eyes fluttered closed and she turned her head ever so slightly into his hand, proving she was not immune to his touch.
She opened her eyes and pierced him with a questioning gaze.
“I need to talk to you, Kyle. It can’t wait.” He used the pad of his thumb to trace the line of her lower lip. “Can I come in? Please?”
She placed her hand gently over his and drew it from her cheek. She seemed to weigh the wisdom of her decision, but she finally nodded. “Fine. But you can’t stay long. I’m leaving for the airport in a few hours.”
He nodded and stepped inside behind her. He shut the door and followed her to the living room, where she tucked herself under a throw on the couch with a yawn. He glanced over to where her suitcases were neatly lined up in the hallway like little soldiers.
“Where are you off to?” he asked.
“Rome.”
He sat in the recliner opposite her and noticed the half-empty wine glass on the coffee table. “Rome? By yourself?” He could’ve kicked himself for asking, but it jumped out of his jealous mouth.
She studied him from under hooded eyes. “Yes, by myself. You sound like my mother. I’m a big girl, you know.”
He steepled his fingers. “I know you are.” God, he knew. Too well. “I’ve always wanted to go to Italy.”
This made her smile. A full-tilt, full-bore, head-on, million-watt smile. His heart melted.
“Me, too.”
He rubbed his neck. “Well, I’m happy for you. That’s really exciting.”
“Thank you.” She watched him fidget a moment longer. “So, as much as I’d love to talk about my trip with you, you said you needed to talk to me? It couldn’t wait?” She studied him expectantly.
“Right.” He stood. “You have anything to drink? You gonna finish that?” He pointed to the wine glass on the table.
She motioned for him to have at it. He chugged it down. Bad move. It didn’t mix well with the Jack Daniels and sudden case of nerves already heavy in his stomach. He made a face and sat back down.
“Jed?” she said, sounding impatient. “Just spit it out. I wanna go to bed!”
He leaned over, his forearms resting on his thighs. “I had this all planned out,” he started. “But I’ve lost everything I was gonna say, so I’ll just start talking and see what comes out if that’s okay.”
Her delicate brows drew together in confusion. “Fine.”
He nodded. “Fine.” He pinned her with a meaningful stare. “Kyle. The first thing you have to know is that I am
so
sorry.”
Her arms crossed protectively beneath her breasts. “Sorry for what?”
“For everything, sweetheart. For all the times I was rude and cranky. For pushing you away.” He glanced down at the floor. “For how I treated you when Charles was here that day.” He looked back up at her. “I shouldn’t have acted like that. I had no right. Especially since I had no claim on you.”
She visibly flinched. “Jed, I told you—”
“I know you told me how you felt about me,” he interrupted. “Please let me finish what I came here to say. I promise we’ll get to that later.”
She acted like she wanted to say more, but she nodded. “Fine. Please go ahead. You’ve spent months being remarkably silent about all this. I’d love to hear what you have to say to me now.”
Ah, temper, temper
, he thought. But he knew he couldn’t blame her. He forged ahead. “You’re right. You’re absolutely right.” He moved to sit next to her on the couch. “The whole ugly mess with Kierstan fucked with my head pretty good. Then my dad.” He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “But you gotta understand, just when I thought my life was on track, just when I had everything I’d ever wanted—”
“Who’s Sam?”
Her face was innocent. She had no idea she’d just reached in and twisted his heart. He looked down between his knees at the floor. “Sam was supposed to be my daughter.”
“Your daughter?” Her voice faltered. “You and Kierstan had a baby?”
He looked up and Kyle had turned white. He reached out, but she leaned away from his touch. “No. There was no baby.”
“I don’t understand.”
“I didn’t either for a long time.” He leaned back on the couch and tried to explain. “Kierstan and I had what I guess you’d call a fast and furious whirlwind relationship. It was hot and heavy and fun in the beginning.”
Kyle groaned and he glanced over. “Do you wanna hear the rest?”
She nodded though she didn’t look like she meant it.
“So, one day, she comes to me and tells me she’s pregnant. I’m surprised, but happy.” He closed his eyes briefly and recalled how it felt to be told he was going to be a father. How he’d stupidly hoped the baby would have Kierstan’s green eyes. “Anyway,” he continued, “being my father’s son I asked her to marry me right away.”
“Naturally,” Kyle deadpanned. “Mr. Flows-With-The-Current-Gentry.”
He smiled. She was thawing a bit. “That’s me. Well, she said ‘yes.’ We planned a little wedding. We bought Gentry’s together as a joint venture and decided on the 60-40 split simply because all the start-up money was mine.” He rolled his eyes. “But I didn’t think a thing of it because she was going to be my wife. We were going to be a family. What’s a little thing like a business compared to all that, right?”
“Right.”
Sometime during his spiel, Kyle had reached over and grabbed his hand. The warmth was reassuring.
Okay, so now here came the painful parts. The ones he’d been holding back. He took a deep breath and looked her in the face. “She’d told me the baby was a girl and we named her Samantha. Then I found out that Kierstan was cheating on me with one of our tattoo artists named Trevor.”
“Oh, Jed!”
He swallowed. “She told me it was my fault that she cheated. I worked too much. Didn’t pay her enough attention.” He gave a half-laugh. “We all know what kind of attention Kierstan needs.”
“That’s bullshit, Jed.”
He adored her for saying so. “Maybe. But deep down I believed her at the time. I did work way too much. All the time, really. Building a business takes a lot of work, especially in the beginning. So I blamed myself for running her straight into another man’s arms. But that didn’t stop me from beating the shit out of Trevor when I found out.”
“Good for you.”
“Yeah, well, to make matters worse, when I was kicking his ass from here to Sunday, he let me know that my beautiful whore of a fiancée had also lied about being pregnant. There was no baby. I lost my lady, my daughter, my family, in one fell swoop.” And it had devastated him. He hadn’t realized until that moment with Trevor how much he’d wanted that child and he grieved her loss as though she’d died. And she’d never even existed.
“You lost your baby and your father almost at the same time.” Kyle squeezed his hand. “I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be. It’s not your fault. I’ve learned to deal with both losses.” And he had. Somewhere along the line, he’d figured out that his father hadn’t hurt his mother on purpose. Life and death were just part of the deal. He’d loved her completely and honestly and was just continuing to do so from another plane of existence. He didn’t know how he knew that, he just did.
Jed shot Kyle a self-depreciating half-smile. “But you wanna know the real kick in the ass of it all? As a way of showing my commitment to Kierstan, I’d already had Trevor tattoo her name and face on my arm. Here,” he pointed to where the koi fish was. “My little
fuck up.
”
“Ah.” She leaned over and placed a kiss to the fish’s fin. “This is much prettier anyway.”
His blood rushed at her touch, but he wasn’t quite finished. Now that he’d started this, he’d see that she knew it all, so she could take him or leave him with total honesty.
“Thank you. I think so, too.” He scooted over, tugging her until she sat in the crook of his arm, and readjusted the blanket across both their laps. He laid his head on hers and let the fingers of his draped arm toy with the top of her shoulder.
She yawned and leaned into him. He could tell she was fading fast.
He kissed the crown of her head. “You know,” he said, “ever since I had to cover up Kierstan’s tattoo, I’ve never done another portrait tattoo for a client and I’ve sworn I’d never get another one.”
“Hmmm,” she murmured, her breathing getting even as she relaxed against his side.
“Because, you see, in order for me to put something like that on my body again, I decided it would have to be tantamount to a promise between me and God that it was forever.”
He felt her lips through his shirt as she smiled against him. “Like sealed in blood?”
“Like soulmates.”
She got very still and he didn’t know if she was still listening. “So, you’d be declaring your undying love or proposing marriage or something?” she asked.
He waited until she looked up at him. “Something like that. But more like giving away my heart and soul.”
She turned and tucked her head back into his shoulder. “That’s a big deal, Jed. Guess you’d better think long and hard before you go getting any more tattoos, huh?” she tried to joke, but he heard her voice waver.
“Guess I better.” He gave her a minute to realize the ball was about to be in her court, then tipped her chin up and looked deep into her eyes. “Kyle, you told me once that you were in love with me. I need to know if it’s still true.”