Authors: Kim Hunter
He rubs slowly around the curves of my peachy behind. Again he stops to get more cream. When he applies it this time, his hands venture a little higher and now he is officially massaging cream on either side of my G-String.
This can not be happening. He's massaging my butt—right now!
And why am I letting him do it?
I know why. Because it's sending my hormones on a one way trip into space, that's why. I'm airborne.
Oh, oh, oh!
I'm officially out of my mind.
I'm now putting all of my mental energy into not letting him know how excited I am.
“OK,” he says, “I think you're ready to bake now.”
He places the cream between our chairs and lies down. I wait for him to say something.
I wait.
Nothing.
He's playing it cool, but we both know what just happened was definitely not normal.
Finally, I can't take the silence anymore. I turn to face him, but he's not looking at me. He's lying on his back soaking up the sun. “So,” I say, “I suppose you want me to put some cream on you now?”
What was I thinking earlier? Oh, I'm such a
fool!
I don't even look at Dylan at dinner. Our parents are back and on their first bottle of wine already. They're staying in tonight, that means I'm going out.
As soon as possible I leave the table and head down to the beach.
“
What's with her?” I hear my mother say as I exit.
What's with me? I'll tell you what: I am out of control. I have NO control.
I think I do.
I tell myself I do.
But my recent history is telling a different story.
This is not like me. This is not normal.
So far Dylan has not only seen me completely naked, I also let him massage suncream all over my butt!
Seriously, like a fool, I just laid there poking my peach in the air as if to say:
Here's my goods, big boy, cream away!
I-can't-believe-it!
Oh, no, no, no!
I even creamed up his back afterwards, like the fool I am!
I kick the sand as I walk down the beach. The sun is just starting to set. It's a long beach. I've already walked one length and I'm on my way back now. In the distance I see him.
Little Dylan Morris, my tormentor!
Oh, you sexy little man, what are you doing to me? He was walking in my direction but now he's stopped. He's waiting for me.
“
Hey, you all right?” he asks.
I think of ten snappy things to say, but in the end I just reply, “Yeah, fine.” But I'm not fine.
“Sorry I took off so quickly yesterday,” he says.
After I rubbed cream on his back, instead of pulling my bikini off me, he ran off. I waited for 20 minutes, like an idiot, at the pool—but he never returned! I don't know what happened, but it made me mad. I got up and walked the length of the beach. When I got back our parents were back, too. I didn't talk to Dylan the whole evening, either.
“Why should I care?” I'm trying to be Miss Cool. What a joke! Even I don't believe it. I give in and try to find out what really happened. “What did you go to do, anyway?” I say.
“
Oh,” he says, “Nothing. I just—nothing, really.”
Nothing?
I roll my eyes. Dylan Morris, you silly little boy!
“
I've always had a crush on you,” he says, changing the subject. “Ever since I was eight.” He turns to the side and laughs. “It's terrible, I know. But I've spent most of my life waiting for our joint family vacations each year, just to be able to spend some time with you.”
“
Really?” I ask. I mean, I know what boys are like. They
like
girls. Any girl will do. But to hold a eight year crush on someone is something else. “I've alway thought you were a goof ball,” I say. I'm also smiling now. Funny, I feel a little better already.
“
Yeah, well, I am a goof ball, I guess.”
“
Were
.”
“
What?” he asks.
“
You were a goof ball. But not anymore.”
“
So what am I now?”
I huff and shoot my eyes up to the sky.
“Now,” I say, pointing at him, “You're a problem.”
He looks at me confused. I walk past him and head back to the resort. I expect him to stop me and ask me what I mean. That's why I said it, after all! But he doesn't say anything. What's with guys? Don't they understand
anything?
Signals, Dylan! Focus, you sexy tormentor!
But he doesn't get it.
Now what do I do?
I can't turn back around. I'll just look stupid. I walk slowly.
Come on, dummy! Ask me to come back!
I think.
I glance back and see that he's walking, alright, but in the opposite direction. Now I'm twice as frustrated as I was when I started my walk. I decide to forget him and remind myself he is just little Dylan Morris.
I return to the resort and sit down on one of the lounges. The sun has already set, but I still wish someone were here to rub cream on my back.
I don't see Dylan for the rest of the evening. After two bottles of wine our parents decide to go out after all. I'm back on babysitting duties. Dylan doesn't join me, so it's just up to me.
The two kids decide on another Disney film. My eyes are watching the film, but my thoughts are playing a different film. It stars a sausage monster and a tube of suncream. No matter what I do, I can't turn it off. So I give up and watch it. My home made picture in my mind is making thing awfully hot inside me. The Force inside me screams,
It's hot in here!
And I agree. It is hot in here.
Did I tell you I am out of control?
Out-of-control.
At breakfast Dylan smiles at me. It's the first time I've seen him since the beach yesterday and I notice how happy I am to see him. Why? Don't ask me that! How do I know?
I sit next to him.
“
Enjoy the walk yesterday?” I ask.
“
Very pleasant, thanks,” he responds.
“
You know,” his mom looks at us sitting next to one another and points, “you two would make a great couple.”
We both go red.
My dad looks at her and laughs. “Rachel, they're just kids,” he says.
Seriously, my dad does think I'm still a kid. I don't know what he thinks of my boobs, but as far as I know, kids don't carry around a rack like I now have. Honestly, what does he think? How on earth can he think I'm still a kid?
“I'm a lesbian, anyway,” I say.
Everyone laughs at my joke except my dad. He doesn't want me to be straight
or
gay. Just a kid. That's all he wants me to be
forever.
After breakfast I stick around Dylan until we're alone.
“I want to talk to you about something,” I say.
He looks intrigued. “About what?”
“Nothing,” I say.
“
Changed your mind already?”
“
No, I want to talk to you about—” I bulge my eyes out to try make it obvious, “nothing.”
Now the penny drops.
“Oh, about what I said yesterday?”
“
Yeah, about
that.
”
He leans closer to me and whispers in my ear, “It's really embarrassing, but if you want to know I'll tell you, but not here. Let's go for a walk.”
Well, well, well. Now isn't this mysterious!
We tell our parents we're going for a walk on the beach to look for treasure. They think that's cute. They actually thought we were serious.
Idiots!
“
OK, now, tell me what this 'nothing' really is?
He breathes in deeply and tilts his head to the sky, exhaling.
“I can't tell you. It's too embarrassing.”
“
Come on, spill it,” I say.
He's standing in front of me now staring out at the sea. I move up next to him. I don't know what to expect, but it all feels very romantic.
“I ran to the shop to buy condoms,” he blurts out.
So much for the romance! Nice move, sausage monster!
“What!” I cry out. “You mean you ran to the shop that's 15 minutes away?”
“
I told you, I'm an idiot. I don't know what happened. But there was the cream, and that bikini you were wearing, and—I massaged your—”
“
Back,” I say, finishing his sentence for him.
He looks at me. “Not just your back.”
We both cringe.
“
And then you offered to rub cream into my back, and I had a brain freeze. All I could think of was things were moving pretty fast and we had the apartment to ourselves but I had no condoms.”
Now I look at him shocked. Oh, yeah, like I'm little miss innocent.
“What did you think you needed a condom for?” I say, acting all high and mighty now.
“
I just figured that's where we were headed. I mean,” he shrugs his shoulders at me and says, “Where else was there to go after I creamed your ass?”
Oh, that's enough!
“Hey,” I say, “You're just little Dylan Morris! I don't want to sleep with you. That's—disgusting!”
I turn and begin to walk off. I don't know what I'm doing. Do I like him or not? Do I want him or not? Is he sexy or not? What is going on with my body? I can't even read my own crazy signals. No wonder Dylan doesn't understand them either.
It's our final evening together, and our parents are already getting sentimental. We have a big meal together and then Dylan's mom says, “We should take a bottle of wine and enjoy the sunset on the beach together!”
This brings cheers from everyone except Dylan and I. We're both frustrated.
The two kids are already trying to pull the parents out of the apartment.
“
I'll clean up and join you later,” I say.
“
Dylan, you help, too,” his mom says. “You haven't lifted a finger this whole holiday.”
Dylan nods.
“We'll be just down next to the path. Be sure to join us—and bring another bottle of white from the fridge with you,” she looks at my mom and laughs. “We'll probably be a little dry by then.”
Stupid winos!
“Sure, mom,” Dylan says.
My little sister is pulling at my dad's pants to get him out of the door. She loves the beach. They all pile out of the apartment in a flurry and suddenly it's just me and Dylan.
He smiles at me as he picks up the plates and then walks off to the kitchen.
That smile. Oh, no. It has some kind of power over me. I'm being sucked into that black hole of desire again.
“You know, I'd trade it all in for one kiss,” he says. He's still not looking at me.
“
What?” I ask.
Now he turns to me.
“One kiss. It's what I've always dreamed about. This vacation I've seen you naked, and I've touched your naked body, but that's not what I've dreamed about doing all these years. It's always been about one kiss.”
He smiles at me again.
That smile!
“
Oh, a kiss,” I say, “I didn't realize you needed a condom to kiss!”
He laughs. “All right, I plead guilty! I'm a total goof ball!”
He walks back over to me and he takes hold of my hand. Just like that. I don't stop him.
“
Yesterday, you said I was a problem. I'm sorry about that. I never want to be a problem to you. You mean too much to me.”
I'm melting right now. Me, melting!
“I didn't mean it in a bad way,” I say. “You're a problem because—” I look away, “I'm so attracted to you I can't seem to control myself.”
This is crazy! My body is covered in goose bumps. My heart is about to fall out of my body. And it is HOT inside me.
“When we first met, I remember thinking you were beautiful,” he says. “We were just kids, but I remember that day like it was yesterday. Every year, you just became more beautiful.” He looks into my eyes, “You're personality. You're humor. The way you talk, walk, laugh, and hang with others. Everything about you is beautiful. But this year, something's changed inside us both.”
I want him! Want, want, want!
I try to remain calm. I can do this.
Oh, I can't help myself. The Force is taking over already.
“I don't want you to be a problem anymore,” I say to him. “I just want you.”
He smiles again, and I'm drowning in it!