It's Just Lola (48 page)

“Anyway, Pop
Wulf
isn
’
t my real father, and who knows when he’ll be home next.  We don’t want to wait.”

“Estela, baby,” Lola switched to Spanish.  It was too hard to speak English when she was upset.  “You need to wait.  You need to think this through.  Marriage is forever.”

“I
have
thought it through.  I’ve been thinking about it for months and months.”  Estelle played her trump card.
 
“We can’t wait, Mama.  I might be pregnant.”
 
Lola
clutched the edge of the table for support
as the room began to tilt
.  Her mouth opened and closed
,
but no sound came from her throat.  “Don’t worry, Mama. 
We
’
re in love and we’
ll be fine.
”
 
Estelle
put her arm around
Lola
, kissing her quickly on the cheek.  “Now we have to go and tell his parents.  I’m so happy!”
  Lola
heard quick steps moving away.

~ ~ ~

Life goes on somehow and we adjust, thought Lola as she
her bus passed
the house where Estelle and Leonard lived.  A block later the bus reached her stop and she began the walk up the hill to her house.  At least she’s close, and we can see each other
often
.  Her thoughts turned to the things she had to do once she reached the house. 

“Mama!  Mama!”  Charlotte was running toward her and shouting in panic.  “Joe just
set the house on fire
!”

Lola had a split second urge to turn around and run back to the bus.  What now?  She began to run as fast as her fashionable shoes would let her. 
Joe
hadn
’
t been happy about
having to stay home after school and
watch his sisters, but she thought he was doing it fairly well. 

Joe appeared
in the doorway
and yelled
at Charlotte.
 
“I didn
’
t
set fire to
the house.  Why can’t you mind your own business?”

Lola slowed to a fast walk. 
S
he didn’t
see
any evidence of fire.  T
he
n
a wisp of smoke drift
ed
out of the kitchen window and
she
started running again.
 
As they
reached the front door, they heard a muffled explosion.

“In the kitchen!
”
shouted
Charlotte
. 
Joe
’s
scowl
disappeared in his shock
. 
They all
ran
to the kitchen.
  The air was filled with smoke and the smell was
terrible
.

“
Ay! Dios Mío!  ¿Qué pasó?
”  Lola
was so upset she
reverted to Spanish.  “What happened?”

“It was just a can of beans,” said Joe.

“Beans?  You
set fire to
beans?”

“No, th
e fire
was the paper on the can.”

“You should
’
ve—“ said Charlotte
, but
her mother stopped her with a look.

“I was hungry and I knew you’d get all upset if I dirtied a pot and you came home to a dirty kitchen
.
I
figured if I
heat
ed
it in the can
,
I’d only dirty a spoon.”  As Joe talked
the smoke cleared
,
and
Lola surveyed the kitchen.  The ceiling had beans embedded in the plaster; sauce was dripping down in sluggish drops that landed with soft disgusting plops; there were reddish brown splatters on the cupboards; there was bean sludge on the walls, the floor, the table, the chairs.  Lola felt that she was inhaling bean miasma with every breath.

“All this from one can of beans?”
Lola
asked.  She felt Nellie press against her, trying to see
what was happening
.  She knew Harry would be right behind her.
  She closed her eyes and
took a deep breath.  Oh, God, he didn’t want her to come home to a dirty kitchen
—
and this was the result. 

“Nellie, it’s your job to keep Harry out of this room.  Charlotte, help
Joe
move the table
so he can clean the ceiling.
You
start cleaning at that corner.  I’ll change and be right back.” 

Hours later the exhausted family was sitting down for a late supper when Joe grumbled, “If I hadn’t been stuck babysitting this
never
would
’
ve happened.”

“If you
’d
paid attention in school you
’
d know things expand when they get hot,” said Charlotte smugly. 

Joe glared at her.
“You’re the most...”  He was still searching for the right word when something plopped into his stew
, splashing gravy in
his face
. 

“
You m
issed a spot,” said Charlotte.

~ ~ ~

Two days later Lola was again met by Charlotte running toward her at top speed.  An unfamiliar car was parked in front of the house.

“Mama, there
’
s a
truant officer
waiting to talk about Joe!”

“Is
n’t
Joe
home
?”

“No.  He wasn’t home when Nellie and I came home, so I got Harry and waited.  I don’t know where
he
is.”

Lola’s heart lurched.  What had happened to Joe?  “What’s a truant officer?”

“
W
hen somebody plays hooky the teachers say it
’
s truancy.  I guess it’s the same thing.”

“Plays hooky?” asked Lola.  “It
’s about
a
game
?”  Her breath came easier. 

“Playing hooky is
n’t a game.  It’s
what Joe and Johnny Fannelli do when they don’t go to school.”  Lola had more questions, but they had reached the house.  Lola’s hand shook as she reached for the doorknob.

“Y
ou just let them take him away?” roared
Wulf
.  Lola nodded.  Maybe
Wulf
was right.  Maybe she should have refused to let him go.  Now that
Wulf
was here, it didn’t sound as logical as before.

“The officer sounded so sure that it was the right thing to do.  He said Joe was lucky to have this chance.  If he didn’t go, the shopkeeper would press charges and Joe would have a criminal record.  If I didn’t let them take him to the school for truant boys, the officer said he
’
d end up in jail.”

“That’s right, Pop.  He did say that, and it was true, too.”  Charlotte spoke up to defend her mother.

“How do you know?”
Wulf
turned toward her.

“Mrs. Fannelli yelled at them when they came for Johnny.  She wouldn’t let them in the house; she said she knew her rights and they had no papers and no right to take Johnny.  They went away, but two days later the cops came and took Johnny.  I guess they had the papers.”  Charlotte shrugged.

“How does she know?” asked
Wulf
in a calmer tone, turning back to his wife.  Lola
shrugged
.

“I know because I watch, and I listen, and I learn,” said Charlotte with
almost
comical
melodrama
.  “I figure things out.”

“Do you know where he is?”

“T
hey gave me an address
, but h
e hasn’t answered my letters.”

“Tomorrow I’ll go and see if they allow visitors and when.” 
Lola felt a weight of responsibility lift from her shoulders.
  It was wonderful to have
Wulf
home
to pick up the reins of male responsibility.  Wulf had his faults, but shirking his duties wasn’t one of them. 
She barely had time to manage the household around her work schedule.

The next day when Lola came home from work,
Wulf
told her he
’
d seen Joe.  He took him paper, envelopes, pen, and stamps.  Joe promised to write once a week.  He laughed as he told Lola that he thought Joe had inherited his temper.  Lola didn
’
t see the joke.  The only part of
Wulf
that worried her was his temper. 

Lola climbed the hill from the bus stop with the happy anticipation of spending an evening with her husband.  When she walked through the door her smile evaporated
as she saw the rage on
Wulf
’s
face. 

“What’s wrong?” she asked.

“Nothing.”  She knew better than to ask again.

It was not until the children were asleep that
Wulf
spoke again.

“You lied to me,” he said in a flat, icy tone.  His eyes held no more warmth than his voice.  Lola swallowed convulsively.  She
’
d never seen this kind of anger from him.  His usual anger was hot, quick, and explosive.  This came out like a glacier—slow and inexorable.  Guilt weighed her down and filled her stomach with stones.  Guilt over what?  She searched her mind for a lie. 

“I didn’t—“ 
Wulf
threw a piece of paper in her lap.  She
felt weak
as she recognized
her
accounting of the stocks and the money she had received from Charlie. 

“You lied.  You said the money you gave me was all he left you.  You let your children do without things like new shoes; you deprive your family of things
they need
; you leave your children alone or in the care of strangers while you work; you begrudge me the odd bottle of whiskey because you say the money should go for food.  And all the time you had a secret fortune tucked away
.
  What kind of selfish miser are you?”
  Wulf seemed to tower over her.

“You don’t understand.”  Lola’s guilt got even heavier.  

“No, I don’t understand.  I’ll never understand hoarding money while those you care for do without.  I don’t understand lying to your husband, either.”

Lola chose her words carefully.  “I told the truth.  I said that what I brought out of the bank was all the money he left us.  What you see on that paper isn
’
t real money.”

“Not real money?  What is it?  Fake money?  Counterfeit money?”

“Do you know what stocks are?”  When
Wulf
shook his
head,
she continued.  “I didn’t know either.  This was something beyond our experience.  Neither one of us had the knowledge to handle these resources.  The bank manager told me the papers had increased in value in the time it took the British Embassy to get me the letter they needed. 

“At first I didn’t tell you about it because I knew that we
’
d do something foolish out of our combined ignorance.” 
She willed him to believe her
.
 
“One of the things I always loved about you is your generosity.  Maggie told me you gave them the money to get the house, and you gave her money every time you got paid, even though you could easily have stayed on the ship and not spent any money on a house.  I loved that about you.”  How should she say what she needed to say next?  She decided not to lie to him.  Not now, not ever.

“I needed time to think.  I didn’t trust the banker, and I needed to talk to someone who could help me understand what he was telling me.  By the time I thought about Charlie, you
’
d already shipped out.  Then I thought you were dead.”  Lola shuddered as she remembered.  She would never tell him she suspected he might have abandoned them.  There was a limit to truth. 

“I went to Charlie and he agreed with the banker.  I shouldn
’
t sell the stocks.  I signed them over to him to manage.  He
didn’t give us much, but it
helped us survive
.  He
promise
d
to sell
when the time was right and we could live on the proceeds.  How do you think we lived that year?”

“I thought the bosun…”

“The bosun, God bless him, would never
’
ve kicked us out, but think about it.  He couldn’t afford the house without you
--
even before there were so many extra mouths to feed and growing children to clothe.  Maggie knew I was getting money from my brother-in-law.  Without it we would
’
ve all been hungry.”

“You should
’
ve told me.”

“When you came back, I was in shock at what I considered your resurrection.  Then the time had passed.  What could I say then?”

“You could
’
ve said what you’re saying now.  I can’t believe you hid it all these years.  Good God, woman, we’ve been here for more than three years!”

“Yes, and we wouldn
’
t be here yet if I
’
d sold those things when I got them.  You
’
d be here and your wife and children would still be in Peru, trying to scrape together enough money for passage.”

“You said you got the money for the tickets from Charlie.  That means you lied again
.
  It was the money you had hidden all the time.”

“No.  Charlie refused to sell the stocks before the time was right.  I told you the truth.  He loaned me the money for our passage—and we used the rest for the house.  When he thinks the time is right
,
he
’
ll sell them and repay his loan.”

“But it belongs to us.  He can’t refuse to sell them
.
” 
Wulf
was nearly shouting.
“Why didn’t you tell him to sell them when you were sewing those miserable silk ties for nine cents a dozen?  You worked day and night and still didn’t have the money to buy a washing machine until you got your job making hats.  Why’d you do that when you had a
fortune
?  You should’ve made him sell.”

Lola was relieved that
Wulf
was getting caught up in the story and his anger was changing into the hot tempered anger she knew would cool.  The new anger was directed at Charlie for the moment. 
S
he shook her head. 
“
I
begged
him to sell, but he refused. 
The worst part is
that
he
can
refuse to sell them. 
H
e ha
s
legal control over the stocks.”

“So he
’
s cheating you out of a fortune
.
” 
Wulf
jumped out of his chair, unable to sit still.  “He’s cheating you and the children—and you
’
re letting him
.
  You didn’t even tell me?  You just sewed those damned ties
.
”

Lola ran to
Wulf
and threw her arms around him, sobbing into his chest.  He did love her.  His anger was about her having to work so hard.
 
“Don’t be angry,
Wulf
.  I made a mistake.”  He put his arms around her and all was right with the world again. 

~ ~ ~

Lola missed Estelle and Joe.  She worried about Joe all alone in that school.  She hated having to put so much responsibility on Charlotte to keep the young ones until she got home.  Poor Charlotte was only ten, and Harry was a handful now.  What else could she do?  Life was hard.

One day Charlotte came home from a visit to Estelle with her eyes wide.  “Mama, Danicci came home while I was there, and he got mad because his dinner wasn’t ready.  He had a bag of rolls, and he threw them at Estelle as hard as he could
.
  He hit her right in the stomach!”

Lola threw down the dish towel she had in her hand and ran out the door.  She could barely see from her anger.  She rushed in the door of Estelle and Leonard’s little apartment and marched up to confront a surprised Danicci.
 

“You listen to me,” she said, shaking her finger in his face.  “If you ever hurt my daughter or my grandchild you put in her belly, you’d better learn to sleep with your eyes open because I’ll come after you and slit your throat like a pig.  Understand?”  She turned and left, leaving Estelle and her husband staring after her. 

When she reached her own
home,
her knees felt weak and her hands were shaking.
  She couldn’t believe what she had just done.  She had threatened a man’s life—and worse, she had meant every word. 

~ ~ ~

A new family moved in
next door
, and the people were friendly.  It was a relief for Lola to know that there was someone other than old Mrs. Snyder for Charlotte to turn to in case of emergency.  The garage where Tom parked his car during the day was right across the street from the millinery shop where Lola worked.  He offered to drive Lola to and from work each day.  At first Lola declined but he insisted.  It would save her at least an hour a day.  Saving bus fare and an hour a day was just too good to refuse. 
T
he grocery bill was smaller without a teenage boy in the house
, and b
etween extra grocery money and the saved bus fare, she actually began to save for a car of their own.

One gloomy day
Tom pulled into the driveway next door
and
Lola
sat
in the car
,
let
ting
him finish
a joke he had heard at work
.  They were both laughing when they got out of the car.  Still laughing to herself, Lola crossed the distance between the
ir drive and
her own house
,
enter
ing
through the kitchen door.

“
Wulf
, y
ou’re home!”  She ran to him with her arms outstretched.  She stumbled when he stepped back before she reached him.

“How could you?”  His face twisted in an expression of disgust.

“How could I what?”

“How could you come to me seconds after leaving the arms of your lover?”

“My lover?” She look
ed
at him in disbelief.  “You mean our new neighbor, Tom?  He works near the millinery shop.  It saves me bus fare, not to mention the walk to and from the bus in bad weather.  He drives that way and is nice enough to let me ride with him.  That’s all there is.”  Lola was getting more and more upset with every sentence.

“I saw you laughing together
, a
nd you came in looking like a woman who
’
d just
—
”