Kallen's Atonement (4 page)

Read Kallen's Atonement Online

Authors: Stephani Hecht

Tags: #Gay, #Shapeshifter, #GLBT, #Paranormal, #Erotic Romance, #Adult

“Sounds good to me. Why don’t you take a shower and shift? I have to go to work in a few, but we have time to have some coffee together if you like.”

Even though he was bone tired, that still sounded great to Kallen. He nodded, then rushed to his bedroom. The first thing he did was shift since his wounds were really beginning to sting. He only stayed in his Hyena form as long as necessary, hating to be reminded of what he really was.

He then showered and got into a pair of his most comfortable sweats and t-shirt. It wasn’t until he was pulling them on that he realized they were a pair of hand-me-downs that Gage had given him when Kallen had first come to the coalition.

Then Kallen went to stand in front of the mirror. He ran his fingers through his semi-long scraggly hair. It was the same style he’d worn most of his life and was popular among most Hyenas. He wondered what it would look like if it were shorter like that of most of the other Hawks.

Rummaging through the drawers, he finally came up with a pair of scissors that looked sharp enough to the job. He pulled them out and began to carefully cut at his hair. Since he’d cut several of his old pack mates’ hair, he wasn’t totally unqualified, but he’d just never had to do so neat a job of it before.

It took him a bit longer, but he finally managed, and once he was done, he couldn’t help but be impressed with the work. His hair was now short and neatly styled, the sides just barely touching his ears, while the back ended at his collar.

Eager to show off his handiwork, he rushed out to the kitchen. When Gage saw him, his mouth parted in shock.

“Do you like it?” Kallen asked.

“Are you kidding? You look fantastic. Who knew that such a great-looking guy was under all that hair? I’m going to have to beat the guys back with a stick.”

Kallen grinned, basking under his brother’s praise.

Chapter Four

Only Ash would want to have an everyday conversation while in the middle of a battle with not one, but two, casts of Ravens. And only Drake would have the sucky luck to be saddled with fighting next to him during said battle.

“So how is Operation Breakfast going?” Ash asked as he dodged a bullet.

They were currently at the shore of the Flint River, doing their best not to be driven into the water by the birds, all the while trying not to attract too much attention from the humans. No problem. Easy peasy. Cue sarcasm.

Drake dove to the ground just as a Raven swooped down, talons extended, its intent to take off his head. “Fine, as he’s gone out with me the past three mornings.”

Ash smiled even as he shot a Raven dead. “That’s great news. It must mean he likes you.”

Drake took a hit to the gut and fell backward. “Has he told you as much?” he gasped.

“Well, he told us he doesn’t hate you anymore, so that’s a start.” Ash hissed in pain when a Raven sliced his arm with its talons.

The bird that had kicked Drake jumped on top of him and began to tear at his chest with his claws. Drake gritted his teeth against the pain, lifted his gun, shoved it in the fucker’s mouth, then fired.

He winced as blood and gore splattered his face and upper body. Ugh! This was so not the look he was going for. This kind of décor was more Shane’s thing, not Drake’s.

Drake pushed the now dead Raven off him, then stood, trying to shake the worst of the guts off. Ash rushed, dragged him behind a dumpster for cover, than began to look over his wounds.

“Dude, your chest looks like hamburger.”

“Is that the medical term for torn to shit?”

“Yeah, pretty much?” Ash said with a shrug.

“Whatever it means, it hurts like hell.” Drake let out a moan.

“Can you shift?”

Drake tried only to find that he was in too much pain. It felt like somebody had taken white-hot lances to his chest and scrambled them around for shits and giggles. It hadn’t even hurt this bad when he’d broken both his legs.

“No, I’m afraid you’re going to be stuck dragging my sorry ass to the van.”

Ash made a tsking noise. “You always did have to make things hard on me.”

“That’s payback for having to listen to your mouth all the time.”

Ash paused a moment. “I guess you do have a point there.”

He motioned to two mated soldiers who were forever stuck with the nicknames Dumb and Ass. The pair fought their way over. Dumb having to decapitate a Raven to get through.

“What can we do for you?” Ass asked.

“I need to get Drake here to the van because he’s injured. Do you think you can cover us?”

“You got it,” Dumb said.

Drake let out another groan. He didn’t know how the two had gotten the nicknames. No doubt from Carson, the coalition’s resident smartass. But at that moment, Drake had never been so happy to see two felines in his entire life.

“Can you walk?” Ash asked Drake.

The wimpy side of Drake wanted to say hell no, but the proud side of himself nodded. “Yeah, but I’ll need some help.”

Ash responded, “No problem. I’ll be there for you the entire way. I promise I’ll only let you go if you get too heavy.”

When Drake shot him a dirty look, Ash said, “Kidding.”

Ash helped Drake to his feet. Drake bit his bottom lip in an effort to hold back his cry of pain. He’d be damned if he gave the Ravens the satisfaction of knowing that they’d gotten to him.

Finally, Drake was on his feet, although he was far from steady. He had to lean heavily on Ash for support.

Ash threw an arm around Drake’s shoulders and said, “Okay, let’s make a run for it.”

As soon as they darted out into the opening, the Ravens were on them. If it weren’t for Dumb and Ass laying down cover-fire, Drake and Ash wouldn’t have made it five feet. As it was, Ash was having to use his free hand to shoot at any Ravens who got too close.

For a second, Drake didn’t think they were going to make it. Then out of nowhere, Logan appeared. He grabbed the other side of Drake and helped drag him toward the van.

“Why is it always you who is getting hurt,” Logan said with a grin on his face.

“Because unlike you, I don’t run screaming like a girl at the first sign of Ravens,” Drake teased, his words coming out in pants due to the pain.

Logan raised his gun and shot a Raven in the face. “You know me. I always love to play the damsel in distress. That way, Jacyn can kiss my boo-boos better.”

“I wonder if that would work with Kallen?” Drake mused.

“I seriously doubt it,” Ash drawled.

By the time they got to the van, they had so many Ravens on their asses that they opened the doors and all but threw Drake inside, then jumped in after him. Drake let out a moan as pain shot through his body.

As soon as he recovered, Ash got on his knees and began to administer first aid.

“Damn, this hurts like hell,” Drake complained again.

Ash applied some strips to stop the bleeding. “Look at it this way. At least you will have an excuse to see Kallen again. From the looks of these wounds, you’ll be in the infirmary a minimum of a few days. That will give him all kinds of time to get Florence Nightingale on your ass.”

Drake mulled that one over. Okay, so maybe getting injured wasn’t totally a bad thing. What did they say about every cloud having a silver lining?

“Ha! Knowing him, he’ll probably put a dagger in the wounds and twist it around.”

“I thought you said he was beginning to tolerate you,” Ash said, still working.

“Yeah, but that’s still a long way from liking me.”

The rest of the ride seemed to take forever, and Drake swore that the driver purposefully hit every bump and pothole in the road on the way there. By the time they arrived, he was in so much pain that even the drugs Ash had given him weren’t taking the edge off anymore.

They put Drake on a gurney and rushed him into the infirmary. Drake soon found himself surrounded by hospital staff, one of which was Kallen.

To Drake’s extreme surprise, Kallen looked genuinely concerned. His bottom lip even quivered a bit as he moved around, getting blood samples and starting an IV.

“We need to get him into the OR, STAT,” Doc Featherstone barked.

Drake wanted to say something to Kallen. To reassure him that everything would be okay. But somebody had put something in his IV and Drake felt himself falling asleep. He tried to fight it, but it was useless. His last sight was of Kallen, gazing down with a concerned look in his amber eyes.

* * * *

Kallen stared down at the blood on his hands. While the sight of it usually didn’t bother him, knowing that it was Drake’s made Kallen want to vomit.

He let out a quivering breath as he tore off the offending gloves, tossed them into a nearby bin, then went over to scrub his hands. He didn’t stop until his skin was red and raw. Even then, he still couldn’t get the visual of Drake’s blood out of his mind.

Kallen rested his head against the wall. Why was this affecting him so much? He didn’t like Drake—right? The Tiger meant nothing to him, so he shouldn’t be this worked up over him.

Kallen bumped his head several times against the wall, as if he were trying to beat some sense into himself. Oh, who was he kidding? He cared for Drake, a lot more than he was willing to admit even to himself.

He heaved in a big breath and looked over to the empty spot where Drake’s cot had been just moments before. Now all that was there were dirty bandages and pools of blood. Left with nothing to do, Kallen went over and began to clean them up.

He was halfway through when Ash came up to help him. They worked in silence for a few moments before Ash asked, “Hey, you okay?”

“I don’t know,” Kallen replied honestly. “I know I shouldn’t be this upset since we just started to get close, but a part of me worries that if he dies…”

He trailed off, unable to finish the rest of the sentence. Ash reached out and grabbed his hand. “It’s going to be okay.”

Kallen gazed up at his friend. “Can you promise that?”

When Ash didn’t say anything, Kallen gave a rueful smile. “I didn’t think so. I saw his wounds, too. I know how bad they are. The Raven could have easily nicked a major artery or organ. He may not make it. All I can think about is all the times I was mean to him and pushed him away, just because I was stupid and afraid of getting hurt. All he was trying to do was be nice to me, and I couldn’t accept that.”

“He understood, Kallen.”

Kallen shook his head. “He shouldn’t have to. Once again, I fucked things up. It seems I excel at that kind of thing.”

Ash reached out and gave Kallen’s shoulder a firm shake. “You have to stop being so hard on yourself.”

Suddenly, it all became so clear to Kallen. The way he could protect Drake and prove his worth to the cast and the coalition. “I want you to start training me to be a field medic.”

Ash looked at Kallen as if he’d grown a second head or something. “Are you crazy? There is no way Doc is going to release you to go out into the field.”

“He won’t have a choice. They are screaming for more field medics. Plus, I’m nothing but a glorified orderly here. Out there, I could actually do some good.”

The more Kallen thought about it, the better he thought the idea was. He already knew how to shoot and fight thanks to his former pack training. So he was already halfway there. He knew his basic EMT. So it wouldn’t take long to train him at all. He could be field ready in a couple weeks tops.

Ash still paused a moment. “You’d have to get Mitchell to okay it.”

“I’m sure he would. He knows more than anybody how bad they need field medics, plus it would help cement my place in the coalition.”

“You do have a point there,” Ash conceded. “And they could pair you with me for a while until you got used to being out there on your own.”

“You go chat to the doc about it, while I go talk to Mitchell,” Kallen said, already heading for the door.

“Wait? Why do I have to talk the doc about it?”

Kallen gave a knowing smile. “Because he’ll never tell you no to anything.”

Kallen went running to Mitchell’s office and caught the Jaguar just as he was about to leave.

Mitchell stopped, his hand on the door, a frown on his face. “Has something gone wrong with Drake? Is his surgery doing okay?”

“I don’t know. The last time I checked, it was still touch and go. That’s not what I came here to talk to you about,” Kallen said.

“Then what did you need? Has somebody been bothering you?”

If Mitchell only knew, but Kallen had made a point to never come tattling to any of the leaders about his problems. They already had enough to worry about without him adding his hurt feelings on top of it. So he’d kept all the abuse to himself.

“No, it’s nothing like that. I was just wondering if maybe you would possibly think about transferring me out into the field. I have battle training, and I’m already trained as a medic.”

Mitchell’s frown deepened. “You know it will be a lot more dangerous out there, especially for you. The enemy will target you as a traitor.”

“I know, but this is something I feel I need to do,” Kallen replied earnestly.

He held his breath, hoping that Mitchell would see things his way. Now that Kallen had come up with this idea, he wanted it more than anything. So much so that he could almost taste it.

“Why is that?” Mitchell asked.

“It’s the only way that I can truly, finally atone for what I did to the coalition. Only then will I feel like we are starting out on a clean slate.”

Mitchell took his hand off the handle and shoved them in his front pockets. “But you have already done so much for the coalition.”

Kallen shook his head. “No, it’s not nearly enough.”

“Are you kidding? You work double, sometimes triple, shifts in the infirmary.”

“But I don’t go out there and put my life on the line like Ash or Drake or many of the others. I should be, too. I’m a good soldier. I just haven’t had a chance to show you yet. Give me a chance to prove it to you. I promise not to let you down.”

Mitchell thought it over for a few minutes before he let out a sigh. “Fine, you can have some training sessions with Vapor. If he says you’re up for it, I’ll put you in the field.”

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