KARTER (17 page)

KARTER.
I finished reading the article on the front page of the Local/State section. Another driver killed due to alcohol consumption. Each and every one is disappointing in a different way. I stared at the page and wondered how many would truly be prevented if people simply either didn’t drink or drank more responsibly.

I don’t know that any one death is more important or holds any more value than another in the eyes of God, but this particular death, to me, provided an odd feeling of comfort. I sighed and turned the page to the obituaries.

As I scanned the obituaries, Jak walked toward the kitchen. Before I could get up, he was behind me, hugging me from behind. As he embraced me and kissed along my neck, he looked over my shoulder and down at the newspaper. He found it half morbid I read the obituaries every day, and had expressed it often. Some days, he asked if there was anyone important or interesting who had died. As I relaxed into his strong arms, his finger scanned the page of the paper. If I didn’t know better, I would have sworn it stopped for a split second beside one of the names. I sighed and looked down.

His hand was gone.

Having already seen the article on the preceding page, I didn’t need to read any more. I focused on the name.

Shelley Peterson, 39, Potwin Kansas

He stood up, cleared his throat, and walked to the window. He stood shirtless and stared through the glass and up toward the sky for a long moment. I poured a cup of coffee and walked his direction. A new abstract painting of the open road was half complete on the easel. I hoped Jak would let me put in his apartment when I was finished. I placed the coffee on the desk in front of the window and lowered myself onto the stool. As I waited for Jak to drink his coffee, I sat and stared out the window and into the blue sky. As he continued to peer out the window, he cleared his throat.

“Anyone interesting pass away today?” he asked.

I shook my head and slid the coffee cup toward him, “Nope.”

I stood from the stool and stepped his direction. Jak had been staying overnight more and more recently. We had both reached a point where it was difficult to sleep alone. When we were finally married and able to be together every night, my life would truly be complete.

He had trimmed his beard into a goatee of sorts, without the mustache. Although Jak was without a doubt the
man
, he wasn’t
the man
. The mustache had to go. With his new haircut and a late summer tan from riding, Jak was perfectly gorgeous. As he reached out to hug me, I smiled and rested my head against his shoulder. Today we were going on a poker run. One of the stops was the bar in Potwin. Although I had been worried about going back to my home town, now I felt as if I could do so without much concern.

I decided if we encountered someone who knew me, I would deal with it at the time. I was done hiding from the truth. In some respects, I hoped someone
would
see me. I’d simply tell Jak the truth. Now, more than ever, I felt my past didn’t matter so much. We all have a past. What we are willing to do and who we are willing to be from this day forward is truly what matters.

As Jak held me in his arms, I exhaled and slowly lifted my feet from the floor. As he felt my weight against his arms, he lifted me and let my legs dangle from the floor. As he held me tightly to his naked chest, he kissed me softly. Feeling as if I was truly in heaven, I closed my eyes and said a small prayer.

God,

I know they say you work in mysterious ways, so it comes as no surprise I can’t often understand this crazy world we live in. Thanks for Jak, and for everything else you have graced me with.

Keep us safe today, and watch over everyone else we ride with. I know it’s tough for you to understand, but I didn’t really care one way or another about her. I imagine you’ll have to sort her out and send her somewhere, so see if there’s a place in heaven for her. She probably belongs in hell, but even though she was an evil woman, I’m sure she had her reasons. I won’t make the funeral, but you know why.

I never cared much for her.

I suppose it’s tough for you to understand, but it’s my choice. I choose to love those who love me in return.

And I know that’s why you gave me Jak.

Pound it.

Karter out.

EPILOGUE

I looked toward the doors as the music played. As they opened, she emerged into the aisle. It was the first time I had seen her in the wedding dress. She redefined beauty, just as Oscar had said.

As they walked the aisle, my breathing became labored. I knew if I were required to speak now, I’d be incapable. Overcome with emotion and joy, I simply wanted to watch my bride walk down the aisle.

I looked into the front row. My mother sat crying softly. She hadn’t attended my first wedding, and I was grateful. Seeing her joy now was worth a lifetime of waiting. She raised her handkerchief to her mouth as they stopped at the bottom of the aisle, not further than fifteen feet from where I stood. 

“On this day, the 6
th
of June, before our Lord Christ, who gives this woman to be married to this man?” the preacher asked.

“I do, sir. Oscar Brown, sir,” Oscar exclaimed with authority.

Oscar wore a black tuxedo with a tailed jacket. The tail from the jacket almost reached the floor. He looked magnificent. Although he had initially requested he be able to wear his Marine uniform, he decided against it when he learned I wanted no ties to the military in my wedding. The past was truly now the past. Our lives were both beginning from scratch so to speak.

Karter had chosen the date of the wedding. June 6
th
. I had something very precious taken from me on this date as a child. This had been a day I had spent a lifetime associating with loss. It would now forever remain a day to celebrate love and the union of two people deeply in love. My mother, as I, could not have been happier. Secretly, she wanted Karter to allow her to pick the day, and reserved this day in her mind as hopeful.

The fact Karter chose it on her own caused my mother and I both to believe there was involvement from God above.

As the preacher spoke, I looked at Karter adoringly.

“Dearly beloved, we are gathered together here in the house of the Lord, and in the face of this company, to join together this man and this woman in holy matrimony, which is commended to be honorable among all men reverently, discreetly, advisedly and solemnly. Into this holy estate these two persons present now come to be joined. If any person can show just cause why they may not be joined together, let them speak now or forever hold their peace,” he paused and exchanged glances between us.

“Marriage is the union of husband and wife in heart, body and mind. It is intended for their mutual joy, and for the help and comfort given on another in prosperity and adversity. But more importantly, it is a means through which a stable and loving environment may be attained. Through marriage, Jak Kennedy and Karter Wilson make a commitment together to face their disappointments – embrace their dreams – realize their hopes – and accept each other’s failures. Jak and Karter will promise one another to aspire to these ideals throughout their lives together – through mutual understanding, openness, and sensitivity to each other.”

“We are here today before God; because marriage is one of his most sacred wishes. We gather to witness the joining in marriage of Jak and Karter. This occasion marks the celebration of love and commitment with which this man and this woman begin their life together. And now, through me, he joins you together in one of the holiest bonds.”

He smiled and lifted his bible to his chest. This was the part we both decided we liked the most.

“This is a beginning and a continuation of Jak and Karter’s growth as individuals. With mutual care, respect, responsibility and knowledge comes the affirmation of each one’s own life happiness, growth and freedom. With respect for individual boundaries comes the freedom to love unconditionally. This relationship stands for love, loyalty, honesty and trust, but most of all for their friendship. These two fortunate souls have never known friendship; only the deepest of love, from the first day they met and her feet were lifted from the floor,” he grinned and nodded his head.

I smiled at Karter. God, I loved her. Only a few more minutes, and I could call her my wife.

“Do you, Jak, Take Karter to be your constant friend, faithful partner, and love from this day forward? In the presence of God, your family and friends, I ask you to provide your solemn vow to be her faithful riding partner and loyal friend in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, and in joy as well as in sorrow. What say you, Jak?”

“I do,” I said proudly.

“Do you, Karter, Take Jak to be your constant friend, faithful partner, and love from this day forward? In the presence of God, your family and friends, I ask you to provide your solemn vow to be his faithful riding partner and loyal friend in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, and in joy as well as in sorrow. What say you, Karter?”

“I do,” she responded.

He nodded his head. Oscar and my mother carried the rings to the preacher.

We placed our rings on each other’s fingers.

“By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife. After you lift Karter from the floor and her legs dangle, you may kiss the bride,” he grinned.

For the first time, I lifted her into my arms and kissed Karter as my beautiful wife.

And her legs dangled six inches from the floor.