Authors: Elaine Breson
“It wasn’t my favorite part of following you. Although, you look like you’ve picked up a few moves since we were together…and a few pounds. You should run more than you have been.”
Always a condescending bastard.
“You have no say over any of that anymore!” The switch in me was instantaneous. I was so furious that I didn’t care if he chopped me into little tiny pieces right now. I was
so
over him trying to have any say in my life anymore. He could say whatever he wanted about my weight and I didn’t care, but he was trying to control me again and that wasn’t happening. “Whatever you’re going to do, just do it Brent. What are you waiting for?!”
“Shut up!” he yelled. “This is happening the way I want it to, not the way you want it to. Got it? You’re all the fucking same. Whine and cry when you don’t get your way. Those other little bitches tried the same thing.” His pacing speed picked up and I knew I needed to tread carefully. I knew his breaking point, and I was close to reaching it.
Wait, what?
“What are you talking about? What little bitches?” Had there been more girlfriends or wives in his past that I didn’t know about?
“All those whores your boyfriend has been trying to protect. I’ll admit, I did pretty well at choosing girls that looked a lot like you. I figured if I couldn’t have you back yet, I’d settle for a close second. Pathetic. That’s what they were. Nothing but a bunch of sad, pathetic whores.” He walked over and knelt next to the bed. He rubbed his hand down my face and I pressed my eyes closed as tightly as I could. “You know no one could ever replace you, right baby?” His voice dripped with sweetness, it made me want to vomit.
Oh my God! How did I not see it before? He was the person responsible for stalking and raping all those women around town! Parker had been working on that case for months. But they caught the guy way back before Thanksgiving. How is that possible? I thought back to the news stories and newspaper articles I read. All of those girls did look like me in a way. How could I have been so stupid not to notice, or to think he was capable of something like this?
“That was you?” My voice came out a hoarse whisper. I could hear the revelation slide off of my own tongue. “What has happened to you?”
“YOU happened to me!” He stood up and screamed, pointing the knife towards me. “You left me! All I ever needed was you, and you left me!”
“You need some help Brent. I don’t know what is wrong with you that you can’t see what you did to me was wrong! Was I supposed to deal with you verbally and physically abusing me on a daily basis? I don’t understand what you want from me. I ended up in the fucking hospital when you made me fall down the stairs!”
“You fell! I didn’t push you.”
“You had your arm around my neck choking me. I really don’t think I’m the person to be blamed here.”
He was looking at me, but his face said he was conflicted. I saw anger, but there was some sort of anguish in his eyes. I knew he had a problem. People who were completely sane didn’t act like this and not understand what they were doing. I knew Brent, and knew that he hadn’t always been like this. I almost felt sorry for him. I didn’t know what was wrong with
me
to think that, but I did.
He walked over and kneeled next to the bed. “Can we start over?” he pleaded. “It doesn’t have to be like this. We can go back to what we were.” The anger left his face and all that was left was…hope, maybe? He practically head-butted me as he crashed his lips to mine. I moaned in distain, but he took it as the complete opposite. He ran his hand up my calf and I kicked it with my other foot, then I shook my lips loose from him.
“Stop it! We can’t, Brent. You need help. You and I can never go back to what we were. It’s not possible.”
He stood up and violently shook his head. “No, no, no, no, no! I won’t accept the fact that this is it. I didn’t do all of this for you, for you to turn around and tell me no! Everything I did, I did for you. You
belong
to me, do you understand that?!” He walked over to the bed and hovered over me. He put the knife about an inch from my throat as he breathed heavily through his gritted teeth. I thrashed my legs around hoping to kick him off of me but I couldn’t move a lot out of fear of causing myself to cut my own neck on the blade.
“He totally ruined you! You were mine until he came along. This is all his fault. You’re a whore just like the rest of them!”
At this point, I needed to buy myself some more time. I still wasn’t certain of what his plan was now that he had me tied here, but I obviously didn’t want to die this way. I had to find a way out.
“Okay, okay. I’m sorry. I’ll do whatever you want. You want me back? You can have me back,” I lied. “You don’t need to hurt me or anyone else. What do I need to do to get you to untie me? I’ll do whatever you want.”
“You’re lying.” He reached into the back of his waistband and pulled out a gun.
I gasped. “No, I’m not ly-lying,” I stuttered. “We can be back together again. We can go back to the way things were! We can forget all about Parker and move on. Isn’t that what you want?” Tears started streaming down my face as he pointed the gun at the empty spot at the foot of the bed. “Please don’t do this,” I begged.
“It’s too late now. We can’t go back.” The gun started shaking in his hand and he stared at it blankly. “This is the only way we can be together…forever.”
He pointed the gun up at me and put his finger closer to the trigger. Was this really how this was going to end? The person I had spent so long trying to get away from was going to end my life? This wasn’t fair. I closed my eyes as tears poured from them. I waited for the shot, thoughts of the people that I loved and that loved me flashed through my mind. Parker was going to find me here, dead.
“I love you,” I whispered in a sobbing breath.
I heard the sound, but it was faint.
CRACK!
CRACK!
Thirty
The rhythmic sound of beeping brought me out unconsciousness enough to make my eyes flutter. As the beeping got louder, I mustered up enough energy to open them. I blinked slowly and tried to decipher my surroundings.
A hospital?
I was in the hospital. I moved my hand but it was heavy and didn’t budge. I looked down and realized Parker was sitting in a chair next to me, head on the bed and hands covering mine. He must’ve felt me move and lifted his head.
“Oh Thank God, you’re awake,” His voice was groggy.
“Yeah, sort of,” I mumbled. “How did I get here?”
“When I got to your room, you opened your eyes for just a second but you passed out the very next second. Scared the shit out of me. The ambulance brought you here, but that was like three hours ago. You’ve only been in this room for a half hour or so. They were running a bunch of tests and stuff.”
I looked out the window and noticed it was still dark. “What time is it?” I looked back at Parker and his eyes were red. He sat there, still in his clothes from the party, and I could tell he had been awake all night. When I tried to sit up to talk to him, the pain shot through me again and I remembered Brent throwing me into the dresser.
Parker noticed and stood to help me sit up. “It’s almost 5:00 in the morning.”
“Am I okay?” I hoped the pain shooting through me wasn’t an indication of something serious.
“Yeah, I think so. The nurse said she thought you had a bruised rib. The doctor wouldn’t tell me anything though, because I’m not your spouse or family member. He said he needed to come back in and talk to you when you woke up.” He leaned over and pressed the call button on the keypad attached to my bed.
“What can I help you with?” the female voice asked over the small speaker.
“She’s awake now. Can you send the doctor in?” As much as the situation sucked, watching him worry about me filled my heart. I would’ve been a nervous wreck if the roles were reversed. There weren’t enough words to describe the love and thankfulness in my heart.
“Sure thing. I’ll page him and let him know.” The speaker clicked as the nurse hung up.
I sat and silently worried about what it was the doctor needed to tell me. “What happened last night?” I asked as I squeezed his hand.
Parker stood up and hiked one leg up to sit on the bed next to me without letting go of my hand. “What do you remember?”
“Um, bits and pieces.” I squinted my eyes when I felt a sudden pounding from a headache. “Brent was there, and he tied me to the chair. I tried to scream, but no one heard me. He took me back upstairs…” I tried piecing everything back together but was having a hell of a time. Finally it all flashed back. “He was standing there with the gun! Is that what happened? He shot me?” I started carefully yet frantically feeling all over my body for wounds.
Parker grabbed my hands and laid them back down on my lap. “No, no, no. You’re fine. You weren’t shot. You probably heard my gun. I shot him when I came in.”
“You shot him? Is he-“
“He’s dead.” Parker said with finality.
Those two words should’ve flooded me with an abundance of emotions. The man I once loved was dead, and man I now loved was responsible for killing him. Instead, I was filled with nothing but relief. Not only was I okay, but Parker was okay too. Even though I was in pain, I threw my arms around Parker’s neck and squeezed. The tears fell despite my attempt to hold them in.
“I was so worried. He said he made sure you couldn’t save me, and all those other girls, and he was going to kill us both, I think.” I was rambling, but it all made so much sense now. “Wait, how did you know to come find me?”
“When I got the call from work while we were at Beth’s, it was because another girl was raped. I was taking her statement, asking her everything that happened, and she told me that the guy who raped her was pacing and checking his watch like he had to be somewhere else. She thought it was weird, but then he called her Sadie. You obviously don’t have a common name, so I put it all together and drove to your house as fast as humanly possible.”
I put my head down and started to cry. “Oh my gosh, Parker. All those girls…they’re all my fault! He was trying to find someone to replace me, and they all got hurt because of it.”
Parker grabbed my face in his hands and pulled it up. “This is
not
your fault, do you understand me? He was fucking crazy. Don’t you dare blame yourself for this.” I knew he was right, but damn it, I felt too guilty to believe it.
Parker looked down at our joined hands and let out an audible sigh. “I’ve never been so scared,” he admitted. “I don’t know what I would’ve done…”
“I’m okay,” I interrupted. “You saved my life, Parker. Don’t worry about what could’ve happened. Look at what you did.”
He looked up and his eyes were glossy. “I love you. You know that right? No matter what
ever
happens, I love you. From here until forever, we will get through everything as long as it’s together.”
I grabbed my neck and realized my necklace was gone.
“Where’s my necklace?” I was slightly panicked.
“Oh, it’s over here. There’s a bag with your stuff in it.” He picked the bag up off of the rolling bedside table and handed it to me. I grabbed my necklace first and put it on, grabbing onto the charm like I had gotten so accustomed to doing.
“Where are my pants?” I pulled the shirt out but that was the only thing in there.
“Um, I’m not sure. I didn’t really pay attention to anything in the bag. You had pants on when I found you and we brought you here though.” He looked as confused as I did. We sat there in silence for a few seconds before I heard a knock at the door.
“Come in,” I said hoarsely, reluctantly breaking eye contact with Parker.
An older gentleman, probably fifty or so, walked in with a clipboard in his hand. He had speckled gray hair and looked every bit the serious doctor part. Parker didn’t budge from the bed as the doctor walked over to stand next to me.
“How are you feeling?” he asked while closing the clipboard.
“Um, a little sore here,” I pointed above my stomach, “and I have a headache.”
“Yeah, you’re going to be a little sore for a couple of weeks,” he explained. “Your CT scan showed that you have two bruised ribs.”
“Must’ve been from hitting the dresser,” I remembered. I sat up a little taller.
“Don’t worry, if you’re still in pain, we can get you some more medication to manage that.”
I nodded, waiting for more.
“We do need to keep you until at least tomorrow to monitor your bleeding though. You bled quite a bit before the ambulance got you here. I’m sorry to have to tell you this, but you are having a miscarriage.”
I looked at Parker, but my eyes filled with tears so quickly that I couldn’t even make out anything more than the outline of him. I felt his hand squeeze mine more tightly.
“I was –“ I squeaked and cleared my throat. “I was pregnant?”
“Yes, about…eight weeks,” he answered by looking at the chart. “Were you not aware that you were pregnant?”
The room was spinning. It wasn’t possible.
Was it?
I reluctantly shook my head no. “Are you sure? I mean, I haven’t been feeling well, but my doctor said I couldn’t get…are you sure?” I repeated.
“Unfortunately, yes. There was a fairly large amount of blood loss by the time you got here. We did an ultrasound to confirm.”
I started to cry. Well, sob. I buried my face into Parker’s shoulder and cried…and cried. I didn’t know that many tears were possible.
“If you have any questions, just call the nurse and they will page me. If not, I’ll just send someone in to give you some more pain meds and I’ll be back to check on you in a few hours. The nurse will come in to talk to you about a follow-up.” I faintly heard Parker say thank you over my crying and the doctor left.
“Hey.” Parker pulled back and held my face in his hands again. He wiped the tears from my soaked cheeks with his thumbs. “Don’t cry. It’s gonna be okay.” I really wanted to believe that.