Authors: Amelia Whitmore
The bus finally pulled up to my stop. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes before finally standing up and walking off the bus. I looked around for my mom, and after not seeing her, I sat on the bench. I sat there for forty-five minutes before realizing that she wasn't coming. I felt so angry that tears welled up in my eye when I called her.
"Hello?" I heard slurred over the line.
"Mom," I asked irritated.
"Ashley? You don't call me.” She pointed out.
"Yeah, well you forced me to move here and then don't even come to pick me up!" I yelled.
"I guess I forgot. Take a cab, I'll pay it here."
"Was that hard to remember to pick me up, mom?"
"I'm not in the mood, Ashley. Just grab a damn cab." She ended the call and I sucked my cheeks in and bit them, doing my best not to scream.
Putting my phone away I looked around for a cab. A few minutes later I was arriving at her place. I paid the cab myself because I knew she probably wouldn’t even have the money to do so.
Standing in front of the house I looked at it, feeling a hard grip in my heart. I hated being here, but for the next few weeks, I guess I would have to put up with it.
I rang the doorbell and she opened it, stinking of alcohol and god knows what else. She looked so much older than she really was. For a moment I felt sorry for her, but it only lasted one moment. She had brought this on herself. She had never done anything to fight her addictions. She simply loved them too much, more than she loved me or anybody else, for that matter.
"Good, you're here. Why don’t you make us something to eat? I'm starving." She greeted me and for a moment I even considered arguing with her, but I knew it was useless. I just entered the house and walked right into the guest room. I had been only a couple of times in this house, and I never felt welcome in it.
I called dad as soon as I got to the room, "Hi, dad."
"Ash, how are you? How was the trip?" He asked me and I could tell he was worried about me.
"It was fine. I'm already at moms. I just wanted to let you know." I sighed, running my fingers through my hair.
"This won't last much and you know it. You just hang in there and soon you'll be here with us."
"I know dad." He gave me a few more instructions on what to do; regarding the school he transferred me too. He knew my mother would probably not even bother doing it.
"I want you to call me every day."
"Dad, that's not necessary. I'll be fine." I assured him, but I couldn’t help feeling more lonely than ever. "Besides, Andy will be calling me every day."
"Hmm of course… you prefer a call from your boyfriend than from your old father." He faked a hurtful tone, but I knew he was teasing me.
When I ended the call, I spent some time putting away my clothes and stuff. When I was done with that, I went to the kitchen to see what I could find to eat. When I opened the door, I almost passed out. The place was filthy, and it struck me this was the reason my mother had forced me to move in with her. Not because she loved me, but because she didn’t know how to live alone, that she needed a free servant to help her.
For a moment I thought of turning my back to that awful mess, but I knew I couldn’t. For better or for worse, I would be living here for six weeks. I couldn’t simply ignore the mess and the dirt.
Rolling up my sleeves I started cleaning and putting some order into the kitchen, cursing fate for making me go through this. I was half way done when my phone buzzed.
"Ashley!! You told me you would call me as soon as you arrived." Lindsey's voice sounded on the other side. "I've been here worried sick…"
"You could have called me earlier…" I teased her.
"Well… you said you would call…" my friend ranted a little more.
"I'm alright. Already at my mother's, cleaning up the mess. Unlike her, I can't live buried in filth." I told her sarcastically.
"What's she doing?"
"I have no idea, nor do I care. I'll try to stay out of her way as much as I can. It will be the best way to survive the weeks here." I sighed and took a seat for a moment. "I already miss you guys so much…"
"We miss you too, girl." We chit chatted for a few more minutes before I ended the call and went back to the cleaning.
It took me a few hours to get the kitchen decent and another hour to make some pasta carbonara. When I had it done, I finally went looking for my mother. Just to find out she wasn’t in the house. Wasn’t that typical of her?
I sat at the table alone and ate my food. I had always hated to eat alone. When Andy called me, I couldn’t be happier. "Andy…"
"How are you? How was your meeting with your mother after all this time?" He asked me, and I was able to sense his concern for me.
"She acted as if she had seen me only a few hours before. She was never a loving mother and I don’t expect her to change, not anymore, anyway."
"Where is she now?"
"I have no idea. I cleaned up a little and cooked some pasta. When I went looking for her, she wasn’t anywhere to be found." My tone showed more pain and hurt than I wanted to and he sensed it immediately.
"Please be strong, Ashley. These weeks will fly by and soon you'll be back home with me."
"I know but already miss you so much." A lonely tear rolled down my cheek.
"I will call you so many times you won't have time to miss me, I promise. Besides, I'll go visit you as soon as I have some free time." He assured me, but I knew that would be hard to get. Football season was only halfway through and his free time was scarce.
"Yes, please do."
We chit chatted for a little while longer, before we ended the call.
I finished cleaning up the kitchen and returned to my bedroom. I had to present myself at school the next morning, so I decided to end the day early. I had no intention of taking my mother into consideration for anything. I would just live my life as if I was living alone. Dad had provided me with enough funds so I didn’t have to depend on my mother. That was all I needed.
A couple of hours later, while I was in my room, watching some TV, I heard my mother returning. By the sound of it, she wasn’t alone. Cautiously, I locked my bedroom door. I had some pretty nasty experiences with my mother's friends in the past, when I was just a kid. I had no intention of going through them again. Men could be real pigs.
The next morning I woke up with my alarm and after a quick bath and breakfast I was out to school. I didn’t even look for my mother. I assumed she would be busy.
At school, things were swift and easy and the classroom I was set in was quite nice, so that part wasn’t going to be that bad. I knew I wasn’t going to make many friends, but that didn’t bother me. I already had my friends waiting for me back home. So I was going to concentrate on my studies and make the best of this time.
When I returned home that afternoon my mother was there, waiting for me with a deep frown on her face. "Where have you been the whole day?" she asked me in a cold tone.
I walked by her, not paying much attention to her mood. "I was at school, where did you think I was?"
"School, I didn’t put you in any school." Her frown became deeper.
"I'm sure you didn’t. Dad and my school's director arranged all the details before I left home." I explained, not that I thought I owed her any explanation. I just wanted to get her off my back.
"They had no right to interfere." She ranted.
"Really, mom, and when were you going to take care of that? Did you even think of that?" I asked her, my hands resting on my hips as I faced her. I wasn’t going to let her make my life more miserable than it already was.
Of course, she didn’t answer. She just turned around and disappeared into her bedroom. I sighed and went to my room. My cell phone buzzed. It was Andy. He had been texting me all day, and that had helped me to get through the day. I missed him terribly, but the texts and the calls sure helped a lot. "Hey Andy."
"Hey, Ashley, how was school?" He asked and I could hear his concern in his tone.
"It was alright. I'm in a good group so that part will be fine." I sighed.
"How are things going with your mother?"
"Tense. I really don’t understand why she insisted on having me here. She's never around and it's not like she cares about me. She is furious today because dad arranged school for me, even when she hadn’t."
"You must feel so lonely, baby."
"I have you. And I love to have you beside me, even if it's by text or a call."
"These weeks will fly, you'll see. And soon I'll have you in my arms again. I'll be able to kiss you so deep and so hard you'll pass away, breathless." He said with so much passion in his voice, I chuckled, just so I didn’t cry.
"Oh… I would love that. I always feel so safe in your arms."
"That makes me happy. So, I'll be free this weekend. The game is on Friday and I already have the bus ticket for that night. I'll arrive in the morning and we'll be able to be together Saturday and Sunday."
"What??" I let out a small cry. "You're coming to see me?"
"Yes… I was going to make it a surprise. But I guess you need something to look forward, to keep you on the right track." He teased me, but I didn’t mind. I was too happy to mind anything.
"Oh, Andy, thank you so much. You've made this week to come so much bearable."
"I won't be able to go there every weekend, you know that. I'll try to go as often as I can." He warned me.
"I know. But I'm very happy you can come this first weekend." I sighed, pleased, and he chuckled.
We chatted for a little longer before we ended the call. I dedicated the rest of the day to work on my homework.
The rest of the week was pretty much the same. I would go to school. Come back to find the house empty or to find mom in a bad mood. Andy and Lindsey would call. I would prepare dinner and mom would eat with me if she was home. She went out almost every night and always returned with someone. It made me think about her reasons to force me to come back to live with her. It just didn’t make any sense.
But I had given up on trying understanding my mother a long time ago.
Saturday finally arrived and I left the house early in the morning to meet Andy at the bus station. When he came out of that bus my heart seemed ready to burst out of my chest. He ran to me and held me tight in his arms, swirling around a couple of times. It felt so good to be in his arms again.
He finally put me down and kissed me just like he said he would, deep and passionately, stealing my breath away. It felt as if we were meeting after a century and not just a week.
"God, I missed you." He whispered in my ear, as he nuzzled my neck.
"I missed you too." I assured him.
We left the bus station and headed to the motel I had found him. It was near my mother's house so he would be as close as possible. I had warned my mother Andy was coming to visit me and that was an ugly scene.
"Who is this Andy?" She asked me in a scornful tone.
"He's my boyfriend." I tried to remain as calmed as possible.
"Don't you think you're too young to have a boyfriend?"
"I'll be eighteen in a month. So no, I don’t."
"Is this what your father has been teaching you?" She ranted.
"I don’t think you’re the person to talk about this, don’t you think mom?" My tone was so cold that she shut up for a few moments.
"I don’t want him in my house."
"Don't worry. I don’t want him near you either."
"What's that supposed to mean?" She was frowning now.
"Figure it out yourself. I'll spend the weekend with him. So you won't be seeing much of me."
"You're not sleeping with him. If you're not home to sleep I'll call the police." She threatened me.
I pursed my lips and frowned. I knew she was capable of doing it. Good thing I never intended to sleep with Andy at the motel. "I'll sleep here, don’t worry."
That said, I went to my room and closed the door.
This morning when I left, she was still sleeping. I was able to leave the house in peace. We reached the motel and Andy checked in and put away is bag. His room was quite nice and cozy. I was glad I picked it.
Watching Ashley disappear with the bus was probably one of the hardest things I've been through in my life. She had become so important to me in so little time that it still astonished me. It was a rough week for me, focusing on my game and not letting it be affected by my feelings. I had promised her I wouldn’t and I was going to do my best to keep my promise.
The trip over to go see her felt endless and when I finally had her in my arms, I felt like the happiest man on earth. I kissed her like there was no tomorrow, loving her so close to me.
Ashley took me to a nice motel near her house. After that, we went to a small cafeteria to have breakfast. I was starving and she was pleased to take me to a nice cafeteria where we ordered pancakes with fruit and cream, along with orange juice and coffee.
I spent the time we were there eating and listening to her as she told me all she had been through that week we've been separated. I just loved hearing her talk, feeling her so close to me. When we were done she took me for a walk around town, showing me her house and her school.
"I'm not inviting you to my house." She warned me.
"Why not, is there a problem?"
"I had a fight with my mother last night over your visit. Besides, I don’t want you to meet her. She's not important in my life and I rather keep you away from her as much as possible."
I could see this situation tensed her, so I didn’t insist. I had no desire in meeting a woman that had made Ashley's life a living hell when she was just a child.
For lunch, we bought some bread, cheese, roast beef, tomatoes and apple juice; and we went to a park for a picnic. It was a bit cold but the sun was up, and we wanted to be alone, out in the open, not locked up in a room or in a restaurant surrounded by strangers. We needed to feed our souls with each other's presence so that we could cope with the weeks we had ahead of us.
"Have you seen Lindsey?" Ashley asked me. I was sitting under a tree and she was lying on the grass, with her head over my lap. We had just finished eating.
"Oh, yes… she comes every other day to check on me, while I'm training. She says someone has to keep an eye on me." I told her, amused.
Ashley laughed. "Oh, yes, that's so like Lindsey. Does her presence bother you?"
"Of course not, I know she's your best friend and I understand her concern."
"Good."
The rest of the weekend went by too fast for my taste. We spent all the time we could together. When the moment of saying goodbye arrived, my heart ached too much.
"I'll try to come back as soon as possible." I promised, holding her tight in my arms.
"I know you will."
"But you can be sure I'll be here on Sunday, after Thanksgiving. Maybe we'll be able to go back home together on Monday, your birthday."
"That sounds like a perfect plan to me." She hid her head on my chest and sighed. "It's only for a few weeks. I'll make it."
"Of course, you will. You're the strongest woman I know." She chuckled amused and I kissed her. Moments later, the last call for my bus was heard all over the bus station. "I have to go. I'll call you as soon as I get home. Take care of yourself and don’t go falling in love with another guy." I warned her, in a teasing tone.
She punched me in my stomach and gave me one last kiss before we said goodbye.