The pain in her voice made him flinch. “There were no letters, no pleas to ransom me and we were so newly married. Many men found that their wives and families would rather leave them to rot in a foreign prison than to bankrupt themselves.” He shook his head, seemingly lost in the horrible memories. “Many good men gave up all hope, allowing themselves to die when they realized the truth. I needed to know for myself.”
Reys got to his feet, towering over her much slighter frame. “I’m sorry for hurting you.” He sighed and rubbed his hand over his face. “I don’t even seem to be needed here anymore, although I have sent a missive to the king to inform him that the Lord of Hawkspoint is come home.” His laugh held no humor. “The castle is prosperous and well run. It hardly seems I was missed.”
“Father Edmond knew.” It wasn’t a question. The priest had sent a missive for the minstrel. Now she knew it was a letter from her husband to the king.
“I swore him to secrecy before I revealed my identity. I had to know for certain why no one ransomed me all those years.”
His pain and suffering overrode her anger, dissolving it into mist. Alicia reached out to him, wrapping her arms around his waist, unable to bear his torment. Her ire could not hold in the face of his hardships and anguish. “I missed you. Every day for all these long years, I have awaited your return. I have done my best, but I am tired of bearing the sole responsibility for all within the protection of Hawkspoint. Only the hope that you might one day return has sustained me.”
The reality of the situation was too much to bear. After years of waiting and wondering and praying, her husband was home. Burying her face against his chest, she wept unashamedly, her tears soaking his cloak.
“Alicia.” He said her name for the first time. Her tears turned into gut-wrenching sobs that were torn from the depths of her soul.
The door to the solar slammed open, bouncing off the stone wall behind it. William rushed in, sword drawn. “What goes on here?” he roared.
Alicia raised her head, trying to speak, but she could not stop crying. William wasn’t paying her any attention. His entire focus was on the man beside her.
“My lord?” William slowly lowered his sword back down to his side. He was pale, his eyes wide with disbelief. “My lord, is it really you?”
Reys nodded. “Yes, William.”
The captain fell to one knee and bowed his head. “God be praised.”
“I have much to thank you for.”
William raised his head and scowled at his lord. “You have nothing to thank me for. I have done my duty.” He stood, swiping the corner of his eyes with the back of his hand.
“You have done more than that.” Reys held out his hand and William came forward. The men embraced, slapping one another on the back. Alicia used the sleeve of her dress to wipe away her tears.
When they parted, William stared at Reys, sadness etched on his face. “Why?”
Alicia knew that Reys understood the question. It was the same one she’d asked. “I had to be sure,” Reys replied. “It has been years and much has changed.” He shrugged. “I am much changed and was not certain of my welcome here.”
A low cry of pain broke from her lips and Reys reached out, gathering her into his arms once again. “I am sorry, my sweet.” He glanced at William. “I ask for forgiveness. The past years have not been easy ones.”
“Nothing to forgive, my lord. You are here now and that is all that matters. Everyone will rejoice your homecoming.”
“We will keep that a secret for now and announce my return in the morning.” He kissed the top of her head. “I wish no interruptions this night.”
William chuckled. “I’ll see to it personally, my lord.” Turning, he left the room, shutting the door tight behind him.
Reys cupped her face in his hands, using his thumbs to brush aside the remnants of her tears. “Will you welcome me home, Alicia? Will you take me to your bed?”
Reaching up, she covered one of his hands with hers and brought it to her lips, kissing the center of his palm. Without a word, she wrapped her fingers around his and led him from the solar to the bedroom beyond. She stopped long enough to grab a candle from the table, carrying it in her free hand.
He followed her, his breathing getting louder and heavier with each step. Her heart was pounding and Alicia was having difficulty drawing a breath. She was afraid to let go of him. Afraid Reys might disappear if she did.
Stopping by the edge of the bed, she put the candle on the bedside table. She turned back to him and went to work on the ties of the black cloak he wore. She pushed the fabric away, letting it fall to the floor. Reys was thinner than he’d been, but that would change in the weeks to come. She would make certain of it.
Alicia reached for his tunic, but he stayed her hand. “Let me.” His hands went to the lacing of her dress. “I remember this dress.” His fingers smoothed over the faded fabric. “It is old and frayed. Have you nothing newer?”
She shook her head. “I didn’t want to spend any money. I’ve been hoarding every piece of silver in case it was needed for ransom.”
His fingers stilled. “You really could have raised the outrageous sum of money I named.”
She nodded. “It would have taken everything we had, but I could have done it. Would have done it.” She needed him to fully understand the depth of her love. “Anything to bring you back home again.”
A sound of pain escaped from Reys and he clamped his lips together. She saw the sheen of tears in his eyes and knew he didn’t want to break down in front of her. He was a proud man and he’d been through an ordeal she couldn’t even begin to imagine. Imprisoned for years. Tortured.
She couldn’t bear to think about it. He was home now and that was all that mattered. She’d spend the rest of her life letting him know how much he was loved and missed and needed.
“You kept me alive.” The words sounded as though they were ripped from him. His voice was ragged and low. “Thoughts of you waiting here for me.”
“Oh, Reys.” A tear slipped down her cheek and landed on his hand with a plop.
He lifted his hand and licked the salty drop. “Your tears are more precious than gold.” He returned to work on her lacings and had her dress open in seconds. Lifting the hem, he pulled it over her head and tossed it aside. She was wearing naught but a thin linen shift. His blue eyes had assumed a stormy look she remembered well.
Her breasts swelled in anticipation, her nipples puckering into tight nubs. She felt the familiar flood of cream between her thighs. She wanted her husband and she wanted him now.
Alicia went to work on his clothing, making quick work of his tunic and shirt. She paused when she saw the long, white puckered scars that marred his skin. “So much pain,” she murmured. Leaning forward, she kissed each one.
Reys unbound her hair and sifted his fingers through the long, thick mass. He briefly clenched his fists in it, holding her close. “I know they’re not pretty to look at.”
“I don’t care about that.” Alicia raised her head long enough to scowl at him. “All I care is that you’re home.”
He sighed and gave a rumble of pleasure as her nimble fingers made quick work of the ties of his chausses. Reys pulled away long enough to discard his boots and the rest of his clothing. Naked, he faced her.
Moonlight trickled in from the window. Coupled with the firelight from the room beyond and the candle on the table, it was more than enough light for her to see him. He was lean, but it was all muscle, sculpted and hard. Scars of various sizes covered his arms and legs.
Alicia swallowed back her anger and tears. They would not change what had happened. “Turn around.” She had to see all of him, know what he’d suffered.
Reys turned slowly, giving her his back. She bit her lip to keep from crying out. It was a mass of scar tissue. It was a wonder he’d survived such brutal beatings. He was naked for her, she could do no less for him. Slipping the linen shift from her body, she padded over to him and wrapped her arms around him, pillowing her breasts against his back.
He sighed and she sensed his relief. “I love you Reys of Hawkspoint. Nothing will ever change that.”
He turned back around and lifted her into his arms. Carrying her to the bed, he knelt on the mattress, lowering her to the center.
Reys didn’t want to speak, didn’t want to do or say anything that might disrupt this perfect moment. He’d dreamed of it so many times he wasn’t wholly certain it was real. Through months of fever and delirium it was thoughts of Alicia that had saved his soul and healed his body.
He knew she didn’t think she was beautiful. That had always surprised him. From the first moment he’d laid eyes on her, he’d been drawn to her. It wasn’t only her lush curves, but her gentle personality. There was an innate kindness that radiated from her, extending to all those around her. How her rough and uncouth sire had produced such an angel was nothing short of a miracle.
But the longer he’d rotted in prison, the more he’d doubted his memories. Was Alicia as perfect as she’d seemed? Was she happy he was gone? Had she remarried? That last thought had tortured him endlessly.
When he’d finally been ransomed and made the long trek back to England, he’d known he’d had to find out or his doubts would haunt him forever. He’d devised the scheme to disguise himself as a minstrel. Traveling musicians were always welcome as they entertained and carried news of the world beyond.
He’d wept when he’d stood on the hills beyond the castle and seen Hawkspoint for the first time in many years. There was a time when he doubted he’d ever see it again. When he’d composed himself, he finished the journey. Living in the castle and seeing it through the eyes of a stranger had been a revelation.
Hawkspoint was a thriving, prosperous keep and the land surrounding it was well cared for. The people were happy and well fed. No lord could ask for more. Instead of making him happy, it had filled him with bitterness. They didn’t need him. Hadn’t missed him at all. The doubts had grown louder. Perhaps his wife hadn’t bothered to even search for him.
He’d watched for days, strumming his psaltery each evening. Alicia had sat at the head of the table each night. She ate little and sat alone, except for one evening when the priest had joined her. There was no man by her side, for which he’d been grateful. He’d talked to the people of Hawkspoint. They were tight-lipped when he’d questioned them about the lord of the castle. And no one would talk about the lady except to say how much she was beloved and admired by all.
Finally, he’d gone to Father Edmond, swearing the man to secrecy. The priest had wept and praised God. Then he’d berated Reys for not being honest with Alicia. It was Father Edmond who’d told him if he wanted answers he needed to speak with his wife. The priest would not betray Alicia’s confidence any more than he would betray Reys’s. Reys had sent his missive to the king, taking several days to ponder the priest’s words.
But his time had run out. Suspicious of him, Alicia had summoned him to her solar. Reys had taken advantage of the situation to push for answers. All his doubts were unfounded. Alicia had remained true of heart, searching for him. Her words had lightened the burdened he’d carried, her tears of joy washing away much of the bitterness and pain.
“Reys.” She touched his face gently. “What is wrong?”
He shook of his melancholy thoughts. The past was done. The future was spread before him. His wife was naked and waiting. “Nothing. There is nothing wrong. For the first time in many years, everything is right.”
Leaning down, he kissed her.
Chapter Three
Alicia hated the shadows that lurked in Reys’s eyes. He’d left her moments before. Not physically, but in spirit. He was back now and she planned to do everything she could to keep his dark memories at bay. She knew he would never truly be free of them. For good and bad, they had shaped the man he’d become.
Firelight danced over his face as he leaned down and touched his lips to hers. Sighing, she released all her doubts and concerns. There would be much to deal with in the days and months ahead, but for now, her husband was home. Her prayers had been answered.
Looping her arms around his neck, she held on tight. Reys lowered his body over hers until they were touching from shoulder to knee. She felt the scars on his chest abrade her skin and wanted to weep. And she would. In private. Not now. Not with her husband kissing her. Now was the time for pleasure, for reconnection, for reunion.
His shaft was thick and hard, pressing against her mound. He flexed his hips, rubbing his erection against her as he continued to kiss her. Heat surrounded her, warming her from the inside out, reminding her of how cold she’d been without him these long years.
Their tongues touched, tentatively at first. Reys groaned and deepened the kiss. Tongues twined, breath mingled as he ate at her mouth, devouring her as though he couldn’t get enough of her.
He broke off the kiss, pressing his forehead against hers. “I have dreamed of this moment, but I find my memory faulty. You taste like the rarest of spices mixed with honey.”
Alicia smiled and kissed his chin, loving the feel of his lightly bristled jaw against her lips. Reys always made her feel beautiful. He had since the first moment they’d met. “Oh, Reys.” She wanted to say so much more, but the words caught in her throat.