LEAP OF FAITH (16 page)

Jack was only nineteen when he wrote his first novel. He was still in college and dating another aspiring novelist, Chloe Long. Every evening they plowed through their studies and then sat side by side typing half the night, dreaming of the day they would be published authors. He’d been so free to share his work back then, reading his story in bits and pieces to Chloe as it unfolded. When he asked to hear hers, she would giggle and tell him she was too embarrassed because it wasn’t as good as his. He was young and stupid and his ego was bolstered by her eagerness to read his novel. 

Two months shy of his twentieth birthday, he announced to Chloe that his novel was finished. He’d even completed the dreaded synopsis but was still working on the cover letter. All he had to do was get a couple of paychecks ahead so he could afford to have it printed up and mail it out. He was even foolish enough to tell her which publisher he had chosen to submit it to. He’d done his homework, researched publishers of murder-mysteries that were interested in the size of novel he’d written, and carefully chosen the one most likely to accept it. If everything worked out the way he had planned, his novel would be submitted one month before he turned twenty.

After scraping the money together and making copies of his novel, Jack packaged it up with high hopes and shipped it off. Three weeks later, he received a notice from the editor stating plagiarism was a serious offense and he should keep that in mind before attempting to submit work that wasn’t his own again. Jack was blown away, certain they had made some mistake. He’d immediately written a letter to the editor telling her so and had received a short, curt letter telling him that his story had been submitted one month prior by Miss Chloe Long. Jack was floored. Chloe had stolen his novel and submitted it under her own name!

Storming into her dorm room, he demanded an explanation, but she merely shrugged indifferently and told him he shouldn’t have been so trusting. He’d gotten what he deserved, Chloe mocked, and he should learn from his mistakes. The book had been published a year later, although it hadn’t done very well, and as far as he knew it was the only book ever published under the name Chloe Long. 

Jack had threatened to expose Chloe and take her to court but she had only laughed and reminded him that her father was a high powered attorney who would crush any chance Jack had at getting a second novel published. In the end he dropped it, but never again had he shared his work with anyone except his editor.

Jack password protected his novel and snapped the lid shut on his laptop. He’d been a fool to trust Chloe, but maybe he was being a bigger fool by not trusting Abby. She was a successful writer in her own right and there wasn’t a dishonest bone in her body. Just a little more time, he promised himself, and then he would decide what to do. Right now it was late and he was tired. He set the alarm for five o’clock and shuffled off to bed. 

***

Abby stared at the shadows dancing on the ceiling. How long had she been here? She remembered the glass shattering. Was it two days ago or three? Everything seemed to be one big blur. She’d gone to bed that night, every nerve and fiber in her body raw with pain. 
Oh, God, Jack didn’t love her
. She remembered waking up sometime late the next morning and noticed the sunlight was peeking through the curtains but had been so depressed that she’d rolled over and went back to sleep. Then what?

She lay there, too tired to move, too despondent to even want to. She thought she’d gotten up to use the restroom earlier but wasn’t sure. Abby tried to focus on something other than her own misery, but it was impossible. She simply hurt too much. She didn’t know how long she had slept in between bouts of wakefulness; sometimes it was light outside and sometimes it was dark. Her mouth felt as if it was stuffed with cotton; not surprising, considering she couldn’t recall the last time she’d roused herself to get a drink of water. 

She tried to force herself to sit up but her arms simply wouldn’t hold her. Maybe if she scooted to the edge of the bed and put her legs over the side, she could sit up. She moved her right leg, straining for several minutes to make the left leg follow suit and finally gave up. Abby spotted her cell phone on the floor, halfway between the bed and the picture window. This morning, or maybe it was yesterday, she had stretched her hand out toward the night table to get it but knocked it off instead and sent it flying across the floor. Even if her parents called and got no answer, they knew she often got so wrapped up in her work she didn’t pick up. It wouldn’t occur to them anything was wrong for at least a few more days, since she usually called them on the weekend. 

She wanted to cry, but didn’t think she had enough liquid in her body to work up a single tear. Then she thought of Jack and how she would never again feel his arms around her or taste his kisses. Abby squeezed her eyes shut again. What reason did she have for getting out of bed anyway? And she’d been wrong about not being able to shed another tear because she could feel the scorching heat of them as they seared a path down the sides of her cheeks. 

***

Jack checked his watch. Eleven o’clock in the morning and Abby’s curtains were still drawn; it was the third day in a row. Maybe she had taken to getting up early before the sun even rose and saw no reason to open them. He knew she wasn’t staying up late anymore because her lights had been off when he checked at ten o’clock two nights ago. Last night he’d stepped outside shortly after sunset and her lights were already out so at least she was getting plenty of rest. 

He started to go back inside but something was nagging at him. He hadn’t caught so much as a glimpse of Abby in the past few days, not even the top of her pretty head while she worked. Had she taken her jeep and left the mountain? If she left when he was out walking in the woods, he might not have heard the engine. The thought that she’d taken off without him knowing made his stomach twist into knots.

He could go down and see if the jeep was still there. If he circled around the front of the house, she might not even see him. No, his stubborn pride wouldn’t allow him to let her think he was giving in. Jack paced back and forth impatiently, glancing down at her cabin every few minutes. He needed an excuse to see her or he’d drive himself crazy with worry until he knew for sure she was okay. He considered telling her he was going into town and asking if she needed anything, but it was too transparent.

One good excuse, that’s all I need
. Jack stopped pacing as an idea began to take shape. It would make her mad as hell, but it was the best reason in the world. Hadn’t Sam Travis paid him to watch over his daughter? And how could he accomplish that if he didn’t check in on her regularly? Jack smiled as he barreled down the stairs and headed for the path to Abby’s cabin.

He rapped on the sliding glass windows and peered inside but she either didn’t hear him or had chosen to ignore him. Undeterred, he opened the doors just wide enough to slip through. The cabin smelled stale. It was obvious she hadn’t been opening the windows to let the air in, which seemed extremely odd because Abby loved working with the fresh scent of the forest breezing through the cabin. He wandered into the kitchen, his stomach lurching at the sight of shattered glass on the floor. 

“Abby?” he called out in a voice that shook with fear. 

He hollered her name, louder this time, as he raced through the cabin toward her bedroom. Jack’s heart did a wild flip when he charged through the doorway and discovered Abby safely in bed, fast asleep. He started to back out but something about the way she was sprawled across the bed bothered him. She was lying on her stomach with one arm dangling over the side of the mattress and the other arm stretched out beside her. He’d never seen her sleep like that before. As he drew closer, Jack was unnerved to see her hair was a tangled mess and covering most of her face.   

“Abby…are you okay?” A foolish question that Jack berated himself for as he hurried around the side of the bed.    

With trembling fingers, he gently brushed the unruly stands of hair from her face, choking back an anguished cry when he saw how deathly ill she looked. Her skin was so pale it was almost translucent and her face so thin it looked skeletal. Her lips were cracked and dry and he could hear a harsh wheezing sound as she struggled for air.

“Oh God, baby,” he cried, “what have you done to yourself?”

Her eyelids lifted slowly as if she barely had the strength to open them. “Jack…” she mouthed, and then closed her eyes again.

He sprinted to the kitchen and poured a glass of ice water. One glance at the full bottle of iron pills sitting on the counter told him she had neglected to take them. Jack raced back to the bedroom, easing one arm under her shoulders and gently lifting her just high enough to drink from the glass he held to her parched lips. 

“Take a sip, honey.”

Abby’s mouth opened slightly when he tipped the glass. She drank about a quarter of the water before letting her head roll back, her eyes locking with his. 

“We need to get some food in you, and more water. I’ll make you better, honey, I swear to God I will.” She looked so frail, it terrified him to think what might have happened if he’d waited any longer to check on her. “You should have called me. You know I would have taken care of you. Why, Abby? Why didn’t you call me?” 

He followed her eyes towards the window and spied the cell phone on the floor. How long had she been lying here, helpless and unable to call for help? And the whole time she was wasting into nothing, he was only seconds away, stubbornly holding out for what?  

“I’m so sorry,” he choked. Jack cradled Abby in his arms as he carried her to the sofa. He held her for several minutes before lowering her onto the cushions and pressing a soft kiss to her lips. 

“I’ll be right back,” he promised. “I’m just going to heat up some soup.”  

She didn’t respond, but her eyes were still focused on his face so at least she was aware he was there to take care of her. He hurried to the kitchen and poured a can of chicken soup in a pan and then shook out an iron pill, grinding it into powder and sprinkling it into the broth. If she wasn’t responsive after he fed her, Jack decided he would take her to the hospital. 

Oh God, what had he done to her?

Guilt washed over him in relentless waves as he poured the warm soup into a bowl and carried it to the coffee table. He scooped her up and settled on the sofa with Abby on his lap, patiently feeding her a teaspoon at a time while he repeated how much he loved and needed her. When she finished the last spoonful, Jack gathered her in his arms and held her close. 

Wearing only a pullover and panties made it impossible to miss the fact she had lost
a good fifteen pounds, which spiked the guilt meter up a few more notches. He glanced down when he felt her hand slowly work its way up his chest to rest over his heart and could have cried at the effort it must have taken.

He held her for a long time, stroking her hair, caressing her face, telling her he loved her. She finally closed her eyes and slept but Jack didn’t move. He didn’t want to let her out of his arms ever again. When she woke a few hours later, he gave her more water. 

“I’m going to help you bathe, honey. I think you’ll feel a lot better afterwards, okay?” 

She nodded and offered a weak smile. Jack left her only long enough to start the bath water then carried her to the bedroom and undressed her.

“It’s almost like that first night, remember? You were weak as a kitten and I had to take care of you.” He leaned down and lifted her off the bed, pressing a kiss to her lips. “I’ll make you better again, Abby, and then we’ll have a nice long talk.” 

Jack carried her to the tub and lowered her into the water. He took his time, gently running the soapy sponge over her emaciated body. Her eyes never left his face the entire time and though she didn’t respond, Jack continued to talk. It kept his mind off the agonizing thought that she could very well have died if he hadn’t found her when he did.

When he finished shampooing her hair, he wrapped a towel around her head and lifted her out of the water. It was quite some feat; holding her up with one arm and drying her with the other, but he managed it with only a minor soaking to his own clothes. Jack grabbed a spare blanket from the linen closet and wrapped it around Abby and
returned
her
returned her
to the sofa.

“I’m going to change the bedding, then I’ll be back for you.”

After stripping the linen and blankets, he remade the bed and went back for Abby, coaxing her into drinking more water before taking her to the bedroom and tucking her into bed. Abby’s eyes widened in panic when he stood up, but he quickly soothed her troubled mind by taking her hand and lifting her slender fingers to his lips.  

“I’m not leaving you ever again,” he promised. 

Even the few minutes it took to shut off the lights, undress, and crawl into bed with her seemed an eternity. Jack pulled her into his arms, tucking her as close to his body as he could. Her head was on his shoulder and her hand moved slowly back and forth across his chest. He kissed her forehead and stroked her hair until her hand went still and he knew she was asleep. Only then did he close his eyes. 

With Abby back in his arms where she belonged, he could finally sleep too.

Abby snuggled closer to the delicious warmth that seemed to have seeped beneath her skin and into her heart. She was having a beautiful dream about Jack, one she didn’t want to wake from.
Jack
. The familiar sting of tears accompanied a dull ache in her chest. She’d lost him. He was never coming back, never going to hold her or kiss her or…

“Good morning, beautiful,” Jack’s deep voice penetrated the pool of misery Abby was drowning in.

The events of the past several days come flooding back as she slowly tilted her head back and opened her eyes. Jack’s smile was like a beacon in the night, drawing her to him as if she had no will of her own. She didn’t wait for him to kiss her, the longing inside was too powerful to ignore, the need to prove he was real too strong. Curling her fingers around the back of his neck, Abby’s lips parted as she drew his head down and took what she so desperately needed. For the first time in over two weeks, the numbing pain left her. She had no strength to speak, but she didn’t need words to tell Jack how much she loved him. 

Jack’s heart tripped when Abby initiated the kiss. It was the first real response he’d gotten from her in the four days since finding her lying so still and lifeless in bed. He pulled her closer, kissing her tenderly, delighting when a soft, muted purr caught in her throat. 

That first day, he’d let her sleep for several hours before waking her so she could eat another bowl of soup. Over the course of the next few days, he gradually introduced more substantial fare to her diet. She still hadn’t spoken, but he could tell her strength was returning and he’d fallen into a routine of taking Abby out on the deck after meals where he would stretch out on the lounge chair with her in his arms.

At first he simply held her without making any attempt to get her talk, content to bask in the pleasure of having her tucked safely in his arms. But when the second day passed and then third without Abby uttering a single word, something deep inside him snapped.  He missed the sound of her voice and melodious laughter, but more than anything he longed to hear Abby repeat the words he’d spoken so often during those quiet hours together;
I love you
. It had come so easy and each time he said it, a large chunk of the wall he’d spent so many years building around his heart crumbled into oblivion.

Jack was so consumed with taking care of Abby that it took him a while to realize he hadn’t even thought about his novel or the looming deadline. What difference did it make if he had his work all to himself or whether his novel hit number one? Without Abby, none of it meant anything anyway. How could he share the triumph of a having bestselling novel with her if he never shared the diligence and hard work that went into creating it?

That’s when Jack finally understood what Abby meant when she said that loving her wasn’t enough; he needed to trust her too. Proving it hadn’t been nearly as difficult as he had anticipated, and he was surprised to discover that once he started talking about Chloe Long and how bitter he had become after what she’d done, the words came tumbling out with liberating ease. He’d been crushed, not only because of Chloe’s betrayal but because his first novel had been published without his name on it. He explained how carefully he hoarded his work after that, cautiously password protecting his computer and never keeping a copy of his novel anywhere except in a lock box at the bank. 

Everyone was suspect, including the postal service, which was why Julia always met with him to collect his manuscript. If she couldn’t pick it up, he delivered it himself. Chloe Long had done one hell of a job annihilating his trust in everyone. Since the day he discovered she betrayed him, Jack never let anyone in the same room where he was working on his manuscript. And with the exception of Julia, who had taken a trek up the mountain on one occasion, no one had stepped foot in Jack’s cabin for ten years.

Abby hadn’t even tried to speak, though her eyes told him everything he needed to know. They were sad when he told her the story, loving when he told her how much he needed her, and there was a sparkle in them when he told her about the second novel he’d gotten published less than a year after Chloe had stolen the first one. She loved him still, and that was all he needed for now. 

But telling her about Chloe wasn’t enough. After breakfast the previous morning, Jack had taken her outside and proceeded to tell her about his current novel. He didn’t stop with the chapters he’d actually written either. By the time he finished, Abby’s eyes were glistening with tears because he had outlined each subsequent chapter and how it would end. He’d hugged her to him for a long time afterwards and nearly cried himself when her arms curled his neck.

And now, at last, she was coming back to him. Jack lifted his head and looked into her eyes. A soft smile curved her lips and he thought it was the most beautiful smile he had ever seen. His heart soared when felt her legs part for him, her moist heat provoking an immediate response. It seemed as if a lifetime had passed since he’d made love to her. 

Jack moved over her, gently easing himself inside Abby’s exquisite warmth. Her body trembled beneath him as he began to move his hips, slowly at first because he was afraid of hurting her. In the end, the taste of her mouth, the heat of her body, the grinding of her hips into his was too much and Jack lost all self control. In that, he was not alone; there was nothing submissive about Abby’s response as her hips rose to meet his, matching each fierce stroke with a fury of her own. It had been too long for both of them and the need to fuse their bodies became a desperate, single-minded need that demanded immediate gratification. 

The depth of emotion Jack felt for this incredible woman was immeasurable. He’d never thought of himself as the type to
need
someone else to make his life complete, but loving Abby had changed that. He needed her in a way that was as terrifying as it was exhilarating because it left him vulnerable and wholly at her mercy. She was everything to him, and as Jack climaxed with a violent shudder, he couldn’t imagine anything giving him more pleasure than sharing the intimacy of making love to her. There was one exception, he discovered a few moments later when Abby nuzzled her cheek against his with a breathless sigh and whispered in his ear,
I love you
.

***

“I can feed myself now,” Abby insisted as Jack lifted the fork to her mouth.

“I know,” he smiled, “but I like taking care of you. Now hush and take a bite.”

Cradled in the protective fold of his arm, she opened her mouth and obediently took the food he offered. Jack had been by her side constantly for five days now and was still treating her with such tender care it made Abby’s heart melt every time she thought about it. He made sure she ate small, frequent meals and plied her with liquids, intermingled with long talks and making love. She was becoming far too dependent on him taking care of her and was trying to wean herself away, but Jack would have none of it.

“You need to work on your novel,” she reminded him when he held another morsel of food to her lips.

“It can wait,” he shrugged indifferently.

“You don’t need to feel guilty, Jack,” she said quietly.

“I do feel guilty,” he admitted, “but that’s not why I’m doing it.” He put the fork down and held her eyes with his. “I love you, Abby. You mean more to me than anything in the world and I almost lost you because I couldn’t see that. You’ve regained a lot of your strength but you’re still not completely well and I’m going to take care of you until you are.”

“Why didn’t you just tell me about Chloe Long before? I still wouldn’t have liked it, but at least I would have understood why you guarded your work so fiercely. I would have given you the time you asked for, Jack.”

“It was a leap of faith I wasn’t ready to take yet. Even giving away that much required trust and I had spent too many years convincing myself no one was worth trusting again.”

“I would never do anything to hurt you.”

“I know that now. It just took a while to get it through my thick head.” Jack caressed her cheek with the back of his fingers. “You’re finally gaining some weight. Your cheekbones aren’t as prominent and your color is coming back.”

“If you keep feeding me like you have been, I’m going to look like a blimp.”

Jack laughed and kissed her. “Honey, you could put on another twenty pounds and still be too thin. I’m going to make sure you don’t neglect yourself again.”

“I didn’t mean for it to happen. I was just so lonely without you, nothing seemed to matter.”

“I should have checked on you earlier,” he said grimly. “If I had, you wouldn’t have gotten so sick.”

“Why
did
you finally come to see me? 

He hesitated for a moment, but it was time to come clean with everything. Taking a deep breath, Jack held her a little tighter in case she decided to throttle him. 

“I’d been watching you, learning your new routine. I knew you what time you usually opened your bedroom curtains every morning, but when they remained closed for three days in a row, I started to worry.”

"I watched you too,” she confessed. “After it got dark, I hid in the shadows of the deck and waited for you to come out to your balcony.”

“You did a good job. I never even suspected you were outside.”

“So you got worried when you didn’t see me. Is that when you decided to check on me?”

“No,” he replied with heavy remorse, “I still wasn’t ready to give in so I tried to come up with an excuse to see you. Then I remembered something. I knew it would make you angry, but it didn’t matter as long as I got to see you and knew you were okay.”

Abby caught the anxious tone in his voice and the troubled look in his eyes. “You’re worried about telling me, aren’t you?”

“I don’t want you to think it has anything to do with why I’m with you.”

“Jack, just tell me!”

He paused for a moment and then said it in a rush, “Your dad asked me to watch over you.”

A smile tugged at the corner of her mouth. “And he offered to pay you for doing it.” She said it more as a statement than a question, but Jack nodded guiltily. Abby laughed and kissed him full on the lips. “I expected him to do that,” she told him. “He just worries when I’m this far from home and would have made himself sick if he didn’t have someone else keeping a watchful eye.”

“The night he came to get you, I tried to tell him I wouldn’t accept the money but he was too concerned about your brother to listen.”

“I’m glad you didn’t get to tell him. He needs to know I’m safe. If you had rejected his offer, he probably would have tried to convince me to come home.”  

“So you’re not angry?”

“Is that the reason you’re with me?”

“Of course not!”

Abby put her arms around his neck. “Then what is there to be angry about?”

“God, I love you,” Jack said thickly.

She gave him a sexy smile. “Prove it.”

A low growl rumbled deep in his chest as Jack lowered her back onto the cushions of the sofa. Then he proceeded to show her just how much he loved her.

***

Jack tugged on Abby’s hand as he led her up the path to his cabin. “You don’t have to do this, Jack,” she said.

He stopped in the middle of the path and whipped her into his arms. “Yes, I do, honey. I want to, I need to.” He looked down at her upturned face and felt a rush of love so powerful he could barely
breath
breathe
. “God, you’re so incredibly beautiful.” 

He gave her a quick, hard kiss and then grabbed her hand and continued up the path. He hadn’t typed a word for over a week now and it was time to get back to his novel. Abby was feeling the itch to get back to work too, so Jack decided today was the day.

While she was in the shower earlier that morning, Jack took her laptop and the notebook she used to jot down notes in and carried them up to his cabin. He’d placed them on the coffee table in front of his sofa and then set his own laptop and research notes on the table beside hers. 

When he’d gone into town for groceries the day before, he bought a meat and cheese tray so they would have something to snack on when they stopped for a break. He wanted everything to be perfect and had even changed the bedding so the sheets would be fresh and clean when he made love to her there for the first time. Glancing around with a satisfied smile after doing a quick cleaning job on the rest of the rooms, Jack had hurried down the path so he could get Abby out of her cabin before she noticed her laptop was missing.

She was laughing at his eagerness to get her to his cabin and deliberately dragging her heels to prolong his agony. When they finally reached the top of the path, Jack stopped and gave her a long, lingering kiss.

She smiled up at him. “What was that for?” 

“For loving me. For letting me love you.”

“Jack…you make me so happy.”

“I hope I always make you happy, sweetheart.” 

He kissed her again before urging her up the stairs and pushing the sliding glass doors open, allowing Abby into his home for the first time. She stepped inside and glanced around, immediately spotting the laptops sitting side by side. With tears glistening in her eyes, she threw her arms around his neck. He held her for several minutes, almost as overcome with emotion as she was.