Libertine's Wife (14 page)

“
He might learn I am back in
London and approach me. What then?” She saw his expression darken
and regretted asking. “I cannot control what he does.”

“
Let us hope he has the
sense to stay away from you. He won’t like what I’ll do if I get a
hold of him.” Garret’s heartless green eyes reminded her he had
little forgiveness for Eustace.

Arianne dropped the matter, not wanting
to fight, seeing he wouldn’t budge. Despite her disgust at her
brother’s disgrace, he was still her only family.

Their parents died when she was barely
five. Eustace was sixteen then. From that moment on, he cared for
her, taking the place of both parents. Until he got in with Edmund
St. Ives, he’d been a devoted brother. She had to remind herself of
that.

Making excuses for him seemed pointless
now, seeing he had very little remorse over tricking her husband in
such a foul way to get money out of him. Eustace never seemed to
see how despicable his actions were anymore. It was but a reminder
that the brother she once loved and respected was as lost as Garret
claimed.

Garret saw her torn expression. “Don’t
even think to try and contact him. I will not have that man in my
life. You press me on this; you go back to my estate without our
son this time.”

Arianne could see he meant what he
said. Anger coursed through her. What could Eustace do now? There
was little influence she could use to get Garret to help him. She
saw no harm in seeing him, making sure he was alright. Her husband
forbid it; setting her up for failure. “You would hold our son over
my head to get your way in this?” She stared at him in stunned
anger. “How can you be so unforgiving?”

“
It surprises me that I
should have to resort to such measures after the way the man
treated you, Arianne.” Garret looked at her with a trace of the old
anger she’d once been on the receiving end of. “It’s as much for
your own good as his. Don’t think I won’t thrash the man as I’ve
threatened to. I meant what I said. He’ll not use my wife again to
line his pockets. You don’t see him as he is, even after everything
he’s done.”

“
He can’t help himself,
Garret. He’s sick—”

He cut her off with a sarcastic laugh.
“Oh yes, I can see how helpless he was in drugging me and selling
off his own sister. He thought nothing of you. I haven’t
forgotten.”

“
Then I hope he doesn’t seek
me out. I can’t be so unforgiving.”

Garret stared at her as if she sprouted
two heads. “What does it take for you to see the man would say or
do anything for one more turn of a card? Do you have to lose
everything too?”

Arianne refused to answer him. She
looked out the window of the coach and pondered that question. In
the back of her mind, she already knew the answer. Recalling the
man Eustace once was would be her downfall.

“
I won’t seek him out,” she
grudgingly agreed and looked away from his penetrating green
gaze.

“
If he approaches you;
you’re to turn him away, Arianne,” her husband warned.

“
As you wish,” she demurred,
but some part of her had to know how her brother fared. She knew
Eustace wasn’t worth her being abandoned again. Pangs of unease
assailed her the closer they got to London.

Wondering what thoughts filled her
husband’s head tormented her too. She allowed her insecurities eat
at her now, unraveling the happy feelings at once. Common sense
told her she was acting like a fool.

Garret merely fulfilled his social
obligations by presenting his wife to society. By Season’s end, she
and Jaime would be sent back to Ravensford Hall, she was sure. She
refused to give into the clamor within her. Whatever chance they
could have was made impossible because of her desperate act long
ago.

They arrived at the residence near the
dinner hour. She stared up at the huge manor with trepidation,
recalling the last time she was here. The memories made her falter,
recalling that scandalous morning as if it was just
yesterday.

Garret saw her hesitation as he helped
her down from the coach. The butler held the door aloft as they
entered. He spoke with the man privately and returned to take his
son, smiling down at her.

“
Mrs. Phelps will have a
bath sent up to you and a tray,” he offered, clearly intending to
spend time with his son.

Mrs. Phelps arrived and her cheerful
face dispelled her sudden feelings of gloom. The housekeeper
remembered her. She made no mention of the ruckus the day her and
Eustace left years before. The woman wore no judgment on her face.
She led her away, chattering all the while.

Arianne was glad she didn’t have the
same room as the one she was given the last time she was here. Her
private apartments were formerly Garret’s mothers. The room was
lovely and large, with a bathing chamber, dressing room, and a
sitting room.

The bed was a myriad of pastels, the
furnishings all edged with gilt. Spacious and boasting an
incredible view, she could not argue her accommodations, only her
husband’s edict of her contacting Eustace.

While she bathed, she reasoned she
couldn’t jeopardize seeking out her brother and being sent packing.
The thought of going back to that monstrous house alone filled her
with horror. No, she wouldn’t seek out her brother and go against
her husband. She could count on his finding her.

Eustace had a nose for money, rather,
other people’s money. She had little doubt her brother would learn
she was in London. Perhaps she could meet with him and be assured
of his health and safety, no more?

The fact Garret came back for her and
their child after years of silence should have warned her. She
risked all to assure herself Eustace was alright. She should have
felt outrage to think of how her brother used her then. She tried
to muster such feelings and felt only pity. For whatever reason,
she couldn’t find it within herself to hate him. What was worse
than what she did?

A tormented sigh escaped her. She
squeezed her eyes shut. Another stab of guilt made her sit forward
in her bath, alarmed by the need to confess all to her husband.
Each moment that passed moved that opportunity further
away.

She squashed such feelings, pushing
them away. They persisted and taunted her. Somehow she hadn’t
thought the matter through years before. She never believed he
would ever come back for her. Now she faced the consequences with a
churning within her heart.

~ ~ ~

Arianne wore her best gown when she
arrived at the dining room. Her husband was once more waiting, only
on her son this time. Garret was seated at Jaime’s side feeding him
from a child’s chair. Her heart lurched to see him dote on the
little boy, looking up and smiling at her with real
affection.

“
I saw no need to let him
eat alone with his nurse. I hope you don’t mind his joining us.”
Garret came to slide her chair in for her and returned to his task.
“He’s a spirited dinner companion. We have already established his
hatred of peas.”

She smiled brightly to see the peas
littering the polished floor. “Anything green seems to offend him
the same. I gave up trying.”

Garret spooned his son up some carrots
and nodded, grinning as Jaime took them eagerly. “Yes, it might be
the color. Can’t say I blame the boy. Are you rested from the
trip?” he inquired as he continued to feed their son.

She murmured her answer, watching him
feed her son with something akin to fascination. Jaime dutifully
ate most of what his father gave him without a fuss. Arianne waited
until the servants finished serving her to broach the question that
troubled her every since he arrived at the estate that morning to
collect her.

She had to know what his intentions
were. If this move was temporary, she would know it from the onset.
“Garret, why did you bring us here? I can’t imagine you caring
about society matters.”

He paused in ladling up more vegetables
for Jaime and looked at her, making her heart lurch. She saw the
desire there, the longing, and the loneliness in his expression,
all at once. She could see he felt the same as she had these last
years.

“
You are my wife, Arianne,”
Garret said quietly, before he looked back at their son. “There
appears to be no point in fighting that fact anymore. We have a
child to consider. I thought we would try to get past the way we
began and start over. It is my hope you will stay on, you and the
boy.”

Hope flared within her to hear his
encouraging words. It was then she resolved to live with her guilt.
“You wish to have a real marriage?” Her mouth went dry, thinking of
his coming to her bed, annoyed by the lustful train of her own
thoughts.

Garret met her look with sudden heat in
his emerald gaze. “I wish it to be real in every way. Does that
distress you, my dear?”

“
No, I’m just surprised. You
made your feelings of me rather clear the last time we spoke.” She
reached for her water glass, aware those eyes slid over her with
alarming slowness. “I never thought you would ever
return.”

“
Let us just say, I’ve had
much time to reflect upon the past. I decided to act upon my
impulses.” The huskiness of his deep voice made the pulse in her
neck throb unbearably under his warm regard. “I would assume you
are willing to be my wife in every way? I seem to recall we had no
difficulty in that capacity. We owe it to ourselves and the boy to
try.”

She was stunned. She could only gape at
his words, recalling how angry he was the last time she saw him.
That man was gone. This one gave her hope for the future. “As you
said, we should make the best of matters, for Jaime’s
sake.”

That seemed to offend him. He raised an
arched mahogany eyebrow. “I never make the best of anything,
Arianne. I want you here. Is that enough to reassure
you?”

Arianne was tongue-tied by his
response. She was aware she was fidgeting as she set her fork
aside. A maid arrived and took Jaime back up to the nursery,
leaving them alone together. Garret ate and his eyes seemed to
stray back to her, leaving her little doubt the direction of his
thoughts. The longing within her was fierce, disturbing in its
intensity. She could hardly wait for him to come to her, her foot
tapping under the table as dessert was served.

Garret had much more control over his
own desires. He ate his dessert with such slowness, she grew
irritated. She stared as his lips parted and ate the delicious
sorbet. Her eyes clung to his lower lip, feeling molten blood
pumping through her veins.

“
You don’t care for the
dessert?” He had a knowing smile about his lips, seeing her dilated
gaze fixated on his spoon.

“
No, no, I’m no longer
hungry.” Her voice was slightly breathless as she watched him eat
more of his dessert. She was disgusted to think of jumping on the
table. She stifled a laugh at the thought of yanking the spoon away
from him, demanding he ravish her right there and now.

“
What is so amusing?” His
green eyes smoldered.

“
Nothing at all,” She tore
her gaze away from his lips only to make the mistake of glancing at
his hands, remembering how they felt upon her body.

“
Do you wish to retire now,
my dear?” He set down his spoon.

She jumped up, making the dishes
clatter. “Yes, I would like to retire.”

“
I shall see you in the
morning then.”

“
Goodnight then, my
lord.”

Garret rose and approached her, making
her swallow hard. He towered over her, making her feel overwhelmed
at once. He took her by surprise and only pulled out her chair for
her. Arianne was disappointed he didn’t snatch her into his arms
and drag her to his bed.

She pouted as she made her way back to
her room, cursing herself for not asking him to join her. It
appeared her husband waited for an invitation. Her tongue stuck in
her throat to say such things aloud. As a result, she would spend
another night alone.

Hours later, she tossed and turned in
her bed, unable to sleep. The tension within her was taut, the ache
of need within her strong. Her confusion over her husband not
pressing her to come to his bed irritated her after three years of
chastity.

A sudden thought made her sit up in
bed. Did he even desire her in that way anymore? Was the telltale
heat in his eyes just her imagination? Her thoughts were in
turmoil. She tossed aside her comforter. She got up, pacing before
the banked fire in the small hearth.

A sound in the hall made her eye the
door hopefully. The footfalls outside passed by and disappeared. A
desolate feeling filled her to know he wouldn’t come to her. The
mantle clock assured her it was quite late. No, her husband went to
his own bed this night. Sighing in disappointment, she returned to
her bed. She found sleep at last.

~ ~ ~

Garret lay awake for hours.
He refused to press her for more this first night back in
London.
We must go
slowly
, he thought in dismay, his rigid
cock mocking his desire to ease back into his marriage
bed.