Libertine's Wife (32 page)

She was healed from the birth and ready
to do battle with her husband.

Julian was away at his club and would
be gone most of the day. She knew he would talk her out of it.
Seeing him return bruised and bloodied from his altercation with
Garret weeks before made her decision. This could not go on any
longer. She had to try again to make her husband see
reason.

Arianne approached his residence on
trembling legs, knocking at the door. Julian’s footman loitered at
the curb in wait. Elliot opened the door and looked grave when he
saw her. The older man seemed distressed to see her
there.

“
Lady Ravensford, dear me,
this is not good at all,” the man said in a lowered tone. “His
Lordship left strict instructions to deny you admittance. I
apologize, but I have to ask you to leave, my lady.”

“
I understand, Elliot, but I
have to see him,” Arianne said firmly, her eyes filled with
defiance. “Do not worry; I will say I forced my way in.”

The butler looked the other way as she
entered, looking about for other servants. “He is in the study, my
lady,” he whispered and smiled encouragingly. “Good luck to
you.”

Arianne approached the door and opened
it without knocking. Garret looked up from his correspondence.
Those cold green eyes moved over her in contempt. Her eyes drank in
the sight of him.

“
Why are you hear, Arianne?”
Garret regarded her coldly, his green eyes like chips of ice as she
approached. “I thought I made it clear you are to stay
away.”

Arianne refused to listen to the voice
of caution. She slammed the door and approached his desk with nerve
she was hardly feeling. “I came here to try to reason with you,
Garret,” she told him, her blue eyes filled with determination.
“You cannot keep my children from me!”

“
I believe I have that
right, my lady,” Garret said with a hostile gleam in his gaze.
“Your present living situation gives me that right. Had you not run
to your lover, I might have not resorted to this.”

“
Where did you expect me to
go?” Arianne asked and shook her head. “You wanted me out, and so I
went. You refused to speak to me and sent back all my letters. It
is my hope you will hear me out.”

“
Hear more of your lies, you
mean?” Garret rolled his eyes and laughed mockingly. He rose from
behind his desk. “Do you never get tired of all this deceit,
Arianne? One would think you an actress with all the damned drama
you bring with you.”

She flinched at his mocking laughter as
he approached, looking at her new ensemble from head to toe with
disdain. “I deserve that,” she allowed and gazed up at him with
sorrow in her eyes. “I never thought I would care for you as I do.
I never thought to ever see you again. I didn’t know what to do
when you came for us! Please believe me that I felt trapped. I
didn’t know how to tell you the truth. I didn’t want to lose
you.”

Garret listened intently, his eyes
sliding over her insultingly. “Oh, but you did know what to do, my
dear. You opened your legs to me quite eagerly, as I recall. You
tried very hard to convince me that you changed, did you not? It
was only a damned lie! All of it! And while you kept me happy at
home, you pandered to Vale for the funds to pay for your brother’s
silence! Don’t bother denying what you did for the money! I can
only imagine what five thousand pounds was worth if I was Vale.
Even once, did you think to end it and tell me, before your son was
nearly killed?”

“
Nothing happened between
us, I swear it! I tried to tell you the truth, Garret, you must
believe me,” Arianne said, her heart in her eyes. “I was scared I’d
lose you!”

Garret reached out and touched her
cheek, his eyes harder then granite. “You cannot lose what you
never had, my dear.”

Arianne’s eyes filled with tears. “You
don’t mean that! You care for me! I know you do! You are angry and
do this to hurt me! Please, let me make all up to you! Don’t send
me away!”

Garret’s eyes filled with a cruel light
in them. “You wish to make it up to me, do you?”

“
I’ll do anything you say,
Garret!” Arianne cried plaintively, tears falling freely. “Just
don’t send me away! I need to see my children!”

“
You know what I want. Go up
to my room and get into my bed. Prove to me how sorry you are.” His
expression was as detached as his words.

“
Please, not like this,
Garret,” Arianne begged, her eyes filled with unease.

“
You wish to make amends,
don’t you? Do what I say. Show me how sorry you are.”

Arianne closed her eyes, fighting the
urge to cry. He watched her leave the study and head up to his
bedchamber. He followed her. She opened the door and went inside.
He entered and closed the door, locking it behind him. His face was
unmoved by her tears.

“
Tell me all will be as it
once was?” Arianne sobbed as she began to undress, her eyes never
leaving his, her anguished eyes looking for some sign he
cared.

Garret’s hands went to his shirt
buttons, a cold smile curving his lips. “We shall see how well you
prove your feelings for me, my sweet.”

Arianne threw all caution aside as she
removed her clothing. Once she was bared to his gaze, he
approached. She shivered from the look of lust in his eyes as he
pulled off his shirt and tossed it aside. He pushed her towards the
bed.

“
Give me no cause to doubt
your feelings for me, Arianne.” His hands went to his fastenings,
yanking them open to reveal his throbbing erection.

Arianne got into his bed and stifled
another sob as he joined her. He looked down at her without
expression. “You know what to do, don’t you, Arianne?” Garret
rolled to his back. “Pleasure me into forgetting what you’ve done.
Make me forget.”

Arianne gave herself up to the
desperation she felt, ignoring the warnings going off as she
proceeded to lavish every sinful trick upon him he’d ever taught
her. When she sat upon him and took him inside her, eyes closed and
moving upon him, she failed to see he was still as detached as
before. He watched her without any softening in his
expression.

For an eternity she adored his flesh,
her hands and mouth making him moan aloud. When Garret finally
rolled her beneath him and took her passionately, her heart wept
with joy. She engaged him, her hands sliding into his hair, soft
cries leaving her lips as a torrent of desire rained upon her. She
was ecstatic, thinking he forgave her at last. She gave herself up
to her husband’s ardor, her heart singing to be back in his
arms.

She slept for a time. When she woke, he
was missing in the place beside her. She sat up, seeing him
standing fully dressed at the window of his bedchamber, his back to
her.

“
Garret?” Arianne asked and
he turned to her. She flinched from the stony cast to his
expression. “Come back to bed, my love.”

Garret chuckled as he approached the
bed, his eyes filled with scorn. He reached inside his vest and
withdrew a wad of pound notes, tossing them on the sheet in her
lap. “I believe you earned that, Arianne.” His green eyes flicked
over her in disgust. “Take it like the good little whore you are
and get out of my house! Do you think I’ll ever be able to look at
you again without thinking what a fool I was to trust you? Now go!
Go back to Vale! He forgives you everything, does he not? Go work
your wiles on him, because you’ll get nothing else from
me!”

“
But….but…I thought…you…
wanted to make amends,” Arianne said in numb disbelief, staring at
him in confusion. “Garret, please, don’t do this! Can we not try
again?”

Garret glared down at her and laughed
cruelly. “I enjoyed the trying all day, my lady. You impressed me
with your considerable charms, if not your intent. I have asked
Helms to seek a divorce. Now do you a favor and get dressed and get
out, before I toss you out!”

Arianne was heartsick as she watched
him slam out of his room. Sobs of raw agony emanated from her lips.
She rose unsteadily and sought her clothes, her mind refusing to
accept what he’d done to her. He’d made her degrade herself with no
intention of taking her back. She cried in desolate grief as she
dressed, her hands shaking as she righted her gown. She felt
nothing inside as she slid on her shoes.

Arianne stared at her repaired image in
the mirror and recoiled. The eyes that met hers were blank and
filled with emptiness. She lost him, her children, her pride, and
her resolve to live with it anymore. Everything she held dear
dissolved in front of her eyes.

She heard a carriage out front and went
to the window. Her heart lurched at the sight of the nannies taking
her children out for a drive. Her eyes devoured the boys before she
stepped away from the window.

Arianne left the house quietly, not
looking back, no hope in her heart. His intention to seek a divorce
echoed in her mind. She would never see her children again, she
knew with a sinking heart. The ride back was painful, her heart
bleeding every block that passed. She ran to her room when the
coach arrived back at Julian’s residence.

She slammed the door and locked it
behind her, her sobs finally breaking against the door as she slid
to the floor. She didn’t know how long she lay there. Her tears
seemed without end. The emptiness within her widened and opened
like a chasm, engulfing her, dragging her down. She didn’t try to
fight it any longer. She allowed herself to fall.

~ ~ ~

Julian watched Arianne sink into a deep
depression that tore at his heart. She took to her rooms, refused
to eat, and lay abed with her curtains drawn, refusing to come out.
He put up with it for weeks. Finally, he could take it no more. He
rattled the doorknob one morning when the maid found her dinner
tray untouched from the night before.

Soon he was pounding on the door. She
didn’t answer. He demanded the key from the housekeeper. After
several minutes, the woman found the key on her ring. He called to
her as he opened the door.

Julian went in and felt uneasy. His
eyes strained to adjust to the dark. He stalked to the drapes,
flinging them back to let sunlight into the room. He turned and
gasped at the sight he saw in her bed. The housekeeper screamed and
backed away, her hand over her mouth.

The bed was soaked with blood. Arianne
lay as still as death, facedown amid the blankets and sheets,
unmoving and as pale as death. Julian recoiled from the smell of
blood as he approached. He sat at her bedside and placed a shaking
hand at the side her neck to feel for a pulse. It was there,
throbbing barely.

“
Send for a doctor
immediately!” Julian began ripping strips from the sheets. The
woman jumped to do his bidding, running as fast as her legs could
carry her.

Julian found the knife on the floor and
with a shaking hand cut strips out of the sheets. He gazed at the
bloody gashes she made in her wrists with a sorrowful cry. He began
binding the wounds, muttering aloud in worry. She was bleeding
profusely. He tied her wrists tightly, praying all the
while.

Julian dragged her inert body into his
arms. He sobbed as he rocked her on the bed. His hand trembled as
it stroked her long, blood-matted hair, murmuring to her, eyes
closed in agonized dread.

~ ~ ~

Garret rubbed his jaw, still thinking
of his wife’s visit weeks before. After he examined what he’d done
more closely, he could hardly stomach looking at himself in the
mirror anymore. The day he’d thrown her out of his house the last
time made him cringe. A part of him wanted to accept her back that
day, believe all she said. After she sought to make amends the way
he demanded, he allowed his anger to push her away once
more.

Garret was possessed by his jealousy
she betrayed him with her former lover, tortured by thoughts of
them together. The doubts assailed him those moments she slept,
thinking of all she’d done.

Garret couldn’t forgive her. He tried
during her brief nap. He kept coming back to all the lies. The
fragile hope slipped away before she opened her eyes that day. His
treatment of her was appalling. He was ashamed of it. Tossing money
at her to degrade her, threatening to divorce her, all just a means
to send her away and keep her as far from him as he
could.

Garret thought of his sons. He tried to
feel differently for Jaime now and couldn’t. That was when he knew
it didn’t matter to him who fathered the child anymore. He loved
him the same. Even if he couldn’t take Arianne back as his wife, he
couldn’t deny her the children she adored.

Garret got up and went into the foyer
before he changed his mind in this. He was about to send for a
footman to run over a message to her. He paused to see an old note
that arrived from Vale’s residence on the bureau by the
door.

He tore open the missive dated two
weeks prior. His eyes closed and he wadded the note in his fist,
overwhelmed with the news it gave. He leaned against the wall to
steady himself. A sharp pain was felt in his chest at the
news.

Overwrought in her grief over losing
her children, his wife attempted to take her own life. He flinched
to recall it was not long after the day she came to him begging him
to take her back. The grave tone of the words implored him to come.
The servants were so used to his not taking messages from his wife;
they discarded them on the tray at the door.