Authors: Angela Verdenius
Stilling in the room, Dee stared at the double bed. Oh God, Ryder had made love to her. Taken her virginity. Taken her. God, just the memory…
Grabbing her handbag, she turned and almost ran down the stairs, hurrying to the garage to get her car out. She glimpsed Del sticking her head out of the back door of the dress shop, but she ignored her yell, driving out of the back lot and onto the road.
Dee knew exactly where she was going, no way in hell was anyone else going to know. Not bloody likely.
The open road was a relief, the farms looking so peaceful as she drove. Winding down the window, she let the fresh air fill the car, the window guard stopping the worst of the wind.
Turning on the CD player, she relaxed back in the seat as Gully’s Fall faded into the distance behind her. With the open road ahead of her and no one around, she could finally let her troubled thoughts free.
Or maybe she shouldn’t, because she just might run her arse up a tree.
Tapping the steering wheel, she concentrated on the song, thinking about her stock, wondering when Jezebel was due to drop her litter, wondering why Ryder had never told her about his cat, why Ryder had been so stroppy about her helping Jason, why he’d bedded her…how he’d bedded her, oh God, he was a sexual bastard. He did love to tease and touch, and as for sweet, slow lovin’, forget that crap, the man was a ravenous beast in the bed.
She went hot all over at the memory. Oh Lord, was he ever a sexual man. He’d pounded into her, thrown her up a sparking incline and shoved her out into an orgasm of which she’d only dreamed. She could practically feel the punishing pace he’d set, the strong thrusts, the way he’d held her thighs apart - holy heck, the memory of the sensation of his hard, muscled thighs sliding along her softer ones, his shaft so deep inside her, how thick and long he’d felt.
Shoving a stray strand of hair behind her ears, she moistened her lips. The ache between her thighs was more than just the loss of virginity. It was unused muscles being given a very thorough and decadent workout. Twice.
Reaching for the water bottle, she flicked the cap off and took several swallows.
Good grief, her nipples were poking against her blouse. She still had forty five minutes before she got to the other town so plenty of time to make those little buggers settle down and behave themselves.
She risked a quick glance down. Huh, they didn’t even show through the blouse, so it was obviously all in her imagination.
Now that she’d allowed her thoughts to wander into decadent and uncertain circles, she thought about the previous night. It had been heaven to fall asleep in Ryder’s arms. It had been a pleasant shock to find out that the man was a snuggler after sex. He’d slid to her side, rolled her onto hers, snuggled her bottom into his groin and cuddled up to her, tucking his face into the crook of her shoulder and neck, placing several kisses on her shoulder. She’d floated in a pleasant haze, then as awareness came she’d started to tense, waiting for him to say something. His soft snore hadn’t been what she’d been waiting for.
Even now she couldn’t stop the little grin. The man had fallen right to sleep. Snug against him, his heat and strength surrounding her, she’d drifted off to sleep in a delicious cocoon of contentment.
He might have fallen asleep quickly but he’d rallied during the night, waking her with soft kisses and caresses, her body weeping for him before she’d woken properly. The hard thrust of his shaft into her, the shift of her sheath as she adjusted to his invasion, had her sweeping along on a fast rising torrent of passion.
Ryder claimed her body, ravaged her mouth, invaded both with a skill that had her quickly shuddering in an orgasm. Rather than join her, he’d continued thrusting, changing his angle, hitting a spot deep inside her that had her writhing mindlessly.
His smile, half seen in the dim light from the landing, was wicked, his eyes catching the light to gleam reflectively down at her, giving him an almost other-worldly air.
If she’d been the fancying kind, she could have thought there was an incubus in her bed, the wickedness of his carnal desire propelling her into a second orgasm. And still he’d kept moving, hips pumping, catching her cry with his mouth, swallowing it hungrily as he rode her up the crest once more, this time shoving them both out into a shatter of hedonistic glory.
Absolutely shattered, she’d clung to him, and when he’d rolled onto his side she followed, tucking against him.
Sitting up, he’d leaned down to snag the throw rug lying across the end of the bed, lying down to draw it over them both, then his arm tightened around her, drawing her close, his other hand stroking down her hip as he nuzzled her hair and kissed the top of her head.
She was pretty sure she’d beaten him into sleep.
Taking a deep breath, Dee swallowed more water and looked out at the passing farms. Cows, sheep, crops. Blue skies, fields.
Being naked in Ryder’s arms was easy in the intimacy of the night, but when she’d awoken minutes before the alarm had peeled five thirty in the morning, the presence of him in her bed had made her momentarily freeze.
The cold light of day brought reality and as she’d peeked over her shoulder to find him lying on his back, one arm flung over his head, his other arm bent with his hand lying on his muscle-ribbed belly, she’d been horrified.
Maybe horrified was too strong, she corrected herself. Horrified, delighted, scared. Mostly scared.
Thank God he’d been asleep. Not knowing quite what to say or do, she’d turned the alarm off before it could peal and slid carefully from the bed. Luckily he didn’t wake and she took her clothes and hurried to the bathroom, having a fast shower before tip-toeing down the stairs to the shop.
Opening the front shop door had been a relief. God, she didn’t know what to think. How could she face him? What did she say when she did?
Oh yeah, she was definitely scared. He’d been horrified when he’d kissed her just days before, and now he’d bedded her.
Hang on
. She pondered that thought. If he was horrified, disgusted - the list could go on - why the hell had he bedded her? Sure, he’d been furious, been all dominant and crap, but hell, that was Ryder all over. Everyone knew he liked to be in charge. Which was a good reason why she loved to needle him, just to watch him bite, but there was a huge difference between telling her what to do - which he’d always done all their lives, just as she’d ignored it - and taking her to bed.
Tossing her onto the bed
. Her mouth went dry at just the thought. Fine, he’d tossed her onto the bed but she’d been a willing participant, hell yes. And there was no denying that Ryder had thoroughly enjoyed himself, no doubt at all. The man had practically pounded her into the mattress and then come back for seconds. That was not the actions of a man who was disgusted by the mere thought of kissing her.
Realising that the car had slowed, Dee glanced down at the speedometer.
Oops.
While she’d been contemplating her sexy problem, her foot had lifted off the accelerator a little. She had to pay more attention or she’d end up in an accident, and then she wouldn’t get to where she was heading and needed to be.
Taking a deep breath, she accelerated up to the speed limit again.
Blowing out a deep breath, she rolled her shoulders. Going back home to face him was something she both anticipated and dreaded, mostly because she didn’t know what the heck was going on in the man’s mind. Right now he was blowing hot and cold, and that was doing her head in. Ryder could do that most times, but not as effectively as he was currently doing.
She’d wondered if he’d hightail it out the back of the building, but no, she’d been serving old Vince when she’d felt Ryder’s gaze, and she’d unerringly turned her head to see him standing in the doorway of the kitchenette, his hair tousled, his eyes still a little sleepy, looking so damned sexy she wanted to kick poor old Vince’s arse out the door and pounce on Ryder. But Ryder had looked expressionlessly at her, then damn it, worry had crept in a little, she could see the frown creasing his forehead, the way he pursed those kissable lips, and she’d gone from wanting to kick Vince’s arse out the door to Ryder’s.
Reacting instinctively, she’d coolly looked him up and down, arched one eyebrow and turned back to Vince, smiling so widely at him that Vince had taken a wary step back, clutching his newspaper. Okay, maybe she had been showing more teeth than normal, but hey, the man of her dreams and fraying nerves was frowning at her from the doorway of her own kitchenette, and
that
was after two awesome sexual encounters during the night, which, she reminded herself a little angrily, he’d initiated. Both times. When she’d glanced back at the doorway, he was gone.
“Goddamn it, Ryder,” she said aloud. “Why the hell did you shag me if it worries you so much?” Grabbing the water bottle, she gulped down a mouthful before dropping it back into the console between the seats. “And Goddamn, why did I let you?” She paused. “Oh right. Hot for the paramedic. Great.” Lifting her free hand, she thumped her forehead several times. “Stupid stupid
stupid
!”
Then she sniffed.
Shit, now her eyes were wet. She was bloody crying a little. Cripes, she was going to be a nervous wreck by the time she got to town. No way was she waltzing into the chemist with red-rimmed eyes and a blotchy face from bawling her eyes out.
“Jesus, Dee.” She took refuge in annoyance. “Get a grip. He’s just a man. He’s just Ryder. He’s a bit of a dick, too. Bloody man. Shag your brains out, give you the best night of your life, made your dreams come true then looked troubled by it all. Well Ryder, you did it, not me!” She glanced at her reflection in the rear-view mirror and pulled a face. “Okay, we both did it, but if he had doubts he shouldn’t have bloody started it.”
Deciding to shove the irritating man from her thoughts, she twisted up the volume of the CD player, losing herself in the thumping music. It lasted for all of two minutes before she had to turn it down.
Even the bloody CD was one of Ryder’s that he’d left in her car. The bloody man was everywhere and that was
literally
everywhere. His music in her ears, his taste in her mouth, his scent on her skin, the sensation of his skin against her like it had happened seconds ago, he was burned into her memory and his seed was inside her. No protection, she hadn’t thought of it, he sure as hell hadn’t, and now she was on her way to the chemist in another town because no way in hell was she fronting up the Gully’s Fall chemist, where the employees were her school friends, and ask for the morning-after pill.
All because of Ryder. And her. She had brains, she could have reminded him, but hey, she’d been having her brains shagged out, so she figured she had an excuse.
Regardless of who was at fault - and she was a firm believer in that it took two to tango, so they were both at fault - the only responsible recourse she had was to ensure no accidental pregnancy happened, and next time… Dee bit her lip. Well, there wouldn’t be a next time. If he was so troubled after a night with her, then that was it. She was done. No more mooning over Ryder Montague.
She sniffled almost the whole way to town, having spasmodic moments of feeling determinedly resolute mixed in-between moroseness.
Jesus, years of loving Ryder that culminated in hot, steamy sex should have had her beaming from ear to ear. Instead, she was dabbing the tears from the corners of her eyes with the back of her wrist.
“You,” she said sternly, “are such a loser.”
An hour later she sat at the small table outside the takeaway shop, a tall glass of iced chocolate in front of her. Milk, chocolate, lashings of cream, ice cream, and curls of shaved chocolate on top, it was a decadent dream. It was also calorie-laden, fat-laden, and buggered if she cared. Right now, she needed it.
Fingering the little box she’d just pulled from the paper bag, she turned it over and over in her hand. For several seconds she allowed herself the luxury of a day dream - she, Ryder, a couple of kids, all living happily ever after - then she ripped the top of the box off, popped out the pill and swallowed it with a harsh suck on the straw, washing the morning-after pill down with a wash of cold milk and chocolate.
Done. It’s done
.
Taking a deep breath, she crumpled the packet up in her hand and shoved it into the paper bag, then sat and stared at nothing in particular, sipping on the iced chocolate while the minutes ticked past.
By the time she was back in the car heading home it was twelve thirty. When she finally drew into the garage in the back lot behind the shops, Del was standing by her back door, arms folded and a scowl on her face.
“What the hell?” she demanded as soon as Dee started across the lot. “Where the hell did you go?”
“To a place called ‘Mind Your Business’. Ever hear of it?” Dee slid her key into the back door, unlocking and pushing it open.
No sooner had she walked in than Del crowded behind her, almost shoving her inside. “Why didn’t you answer your mobile?”
“I didn’t hear it ring.” She walked into the closed shop, moving to the counter and getting the EFTPOS balance.
Her mobile was dumped on the counter, narrowly missing her fingers. “Because you obviously left it behind, genius!”