Lies Beneath the Surface (Buried Secrets #2) (37 page)

I stare up at the ceiling trying to steady my breathing as the nightmare replays over and over in my mind. I’ve woke up a couple of times, but all I can remember is screaming uncontrollably before drifting back off to dream again. Sleep is easier. I’m safe, protected there by piercing blue eyes that comfort me and keep the nightmares at bay. It took me a few minutes to recognize my surroundings when I woke up and I nearly screamed out again in fear. But seeing Luke Ashton slumped over in the chair next to my bed instantly hushed the anxiety that was working its way up my chest. I grip the edge of the bed, trying to shift my body and flaming heat sweeps across my abdomen. I moan softly, then bite down on my lip to hush my cry, hoping I don’t wake Luke.

His head snaps up quickly, and sleep laden blue eyes pierce mine with a fierce intensity. He scrubs his hand over his face waking himself up before approaching my bed. I stare up at Luke in shocked disbelief. "Hey, sweetheart." He whispers softly. "Try not to move too much. I'll be right back with a nurse." He backs away slowly, his wild blue eyes never leaving mine as he steps from the room.

Luke returns almost instantly with a middle aged man in tow. The man introduces himself as Dr. Hensley and begins to ask routine questions as he checks the monitors. I was out much longer than I realized; over thirty two hours. Dr. Hensley tells me he sedated me twice because when I woke up terror stricken, screaming and crying the nurses couldn’t control me. He said that sleep would be the best cure for the shock and it would allow my body to rest.

Luk
e sits, then stands, then paces the floor before finally resting himself against the wall. Dr. Hensley presses the stethoscope to my side and I cry out in pain, gripping the sheet tightly in my fist. Luke grumbles low in his throat, taking a step towards me before thinking twice and stepping back in his place. Feeling his eyes on me I peek up through my lashes and suddenly feel naked and exposed as he watches Dr. Hensley’s every move. I want to hide under the covers, become invisible to his piercing glare.

"Stop staring, it's rude," I
snap at him. He arches his eyebrow in surprise but his glare never wavers. In fact, he watches me closer with a smirk splayed across his face. If his goal is to make me feel uncomfortable- mission frickin' accomplished.

"Well it appears you're s
punky nature has returned." The doctor chuckles. "The bruising is getting lighter. We’ll order an x-ray to check your lungs. How do you feel, Mrs. Moore?"

"Terrible, if I'm being completely honest with you." Inhaling slowly through gritted teeth; talking, hell breathing hurts like a damn bitch.

“That’s to be expected. I’ll have the nurse remove the catheter; that will ease some discomfort. Right now if you feel like walking, that will help work out the soreness and it will also help your lung heal up quicker. Otherwise, stay elevated when you’re resting. Be sure to use the spirometer also. You’re other injuries will heal on their own.”

“When can I go home?”

"A few more days. We'll keep you in intensive care tonight and with better progress we may be able to move you to a regular room tomorrow. Do you have any questions?" I open my mouth to speak then close it quickly before answering, my lips pursing together. Casting my eyes down I shake my head. "Very well then. If you need anything please use the red call button. I'll have the nurse order a meal; best way to regain your energy is by nourishing your body." The doctor tips his head towards me then shakes Luke's hand before exiting the room.

Taking two wide st
rides towards me, Luke pulls a phone from his pocket and begins to fiddle with it as he sits down.

"Luke?" He hums low in his throat
in response to me, but keeps his eyes trained on his phone. "Why are you here?" His eyes snap up meeting mine and I wince seeing the pain that flashes in his eyes. The most beautiful ocean blue irises I've ever saw peer back at me sadly and a twinge of guilt pangs me for insulting him.

"Where should I be, sweetheart?"

"I - I dunno. I just wasn't expecting you to be here. Hell, I wasn't expecting to be here." I stammer around my words.

"You probably wouldn't be if I hadn't got to you when I did."

"How? I only remember calling Colton then everything after that is fuzzy."

"You might've called Colton first but I don't think you got a hold of him because he was underground when that all happened, Savannah. You called me, yelled help then all I heard was the most agonizing screams," his head falls to his palms and he grumbles before scrubbing his hands over his face. "You're safe now, sweetheart."

Pulling in a ragged breath, I twist the sheet between my fingers nervously. "Did you save us, Luke?” He leans closer and presses a feather lite kiss to back of my hand.  A streak of light peeks through the room from the bright hallway.

Looking into my eyes
Luke mutters, "Not soon enough." He pulls away and his usual ocean blue irises are dark, almost as if there’s a thunder storm brewing in his eyes. Pure raw emotion is all I see in his eyes, so much that it terrifies me and I don’t know why. He steps away from the bed, and leans down to give Carly a hug as Colton wheels her into the room. Without looking back he leaves the room with his shoulders slumped. 

“I’m so glad to see your eyes opened, Savannah. I’ve been so worried about you.
” Carly says linking our hands together. Colton gives me a smirk and takes Luke’s place in the chair next to my bed.

“You. You look like shit, Carly.” I snicker then wince as
deep heat blankets my side. “Damn it hurts to breath.”

“You’re in really bad shape, Sis. Lucky to be here. If Luke hadn’t got to us when he did, it’s hard telling what would have happened with us.
Why did you call him and not nine-one-one?”

“
I was trying to call Colton, he needed to get to you and the baby. I don’t even remember calling Luke. Everything is still pretty fuzzy. I don’t even know what day it is.” Suddenly I remember, I have no idea who has my kids. Panic rises up in my chest and my heart thuds loudly in my ears. “Damn it, where are Brailee and Braden? Oh God, please tell me Josh doesn’t have my babies!” I shriek and try to will my legs to move to get up. Colton stands up quickly, ready to take action in case I do have the energy to move, but I don’t.

“Savannah, calm down. They’re with Heidi Jo and Momma. They’re safe.”

I release a pent up breath of air and moan from the burning sensation in my chest. Relaxing back against the bed I ask, “What about Josh? What happens now?” I was lucky enough to get away within a hair of my life this time. I don’t want to have to look over my shoulder every day worried that he’s lurking in the shadows.

“
You don’t have to worry about Josh, Savannah. Once the police got statements from the EMT and emergency room physicians he was arrested. With all the charges he has between Black Pike, Simon Energy then this, he won’t see the light of day for a long while.”

“
Bastard better thank God the cops got to him before I did, that’s for damn sure.” Carly shoots daggers at Colton and he shrugs, “Don’t give me that look, darlin’. Death would be too gracious for that son of a bitch; he deserves to suffer.”

“I’m sorry, Colton.” I whisper, hanging my head low in shame.

“What the hell you got to be sorry ‘bout, Savannah?”

“I put Carly in harms way.”

“Savannah, don’t you dare put the blame on your shoulders. I told Carly months ago that she needed to tell you about the real connection with Drew Varney. But she knew something was up with you, and she didn’t know if you could handle it. I’d put a stop to Josh myself, but Carly begged me not to. She tried to protect you, Savannah. None of this shit is your fault. Or Carly’s.” Colton’s furious and I can’t blame him.

“He’s right, Savannah. I want you to move into Daddy’s house. Colton and Luke can move you and the kids in before they release you from the hospital
, so when you go home you don’t have all the memories and nightmares haunting you. It will be a fresh step towards a new life.”

“I’ll think about it. Colton, do you mind going to get the kids. I really need to see them.”

“I’ll go.” Luke says as he enters the room. “Colton needs to be with Carly. I’ll be back shortly.” He nods to me before turning on his heels and leaving.

While I wait for Luke to return with Brailee and Braden,
Carly fills me in on the
Lifetime Movie in the making
that is my life, trying to catch me up to speed on all that I’ve been oblivious too. From the destruction at Black Ridge, to her battle with Drew and the trust company that Daddy secretly left Josh when he died. The most unbelievable and painful part of it all is that everything could have been prevented had Daddy not been so dishonest. He buried his secrets so deep he didn’t expect anyone would find them. Not only did he have a second family, a bastard son that we knew nothing about, but he had been in business with Josh and Drew for years with Black Pike.

Black Pike
has been in the news for the last year or so. The company is claimed to be responsible for pumping coal slurry into the ground that eventually seeped into water wells tainting the water supply which has caused a number of illnesses and property damage. They apparently thought they were clever hiding behind an anonymous trust, but Carly’s attorney Michele was able to uncover the company’s ownership. Unfortunately for Josh, since Daddy was kind enough to leave Black Pike in his power, all damages will fall onto him.

Damn, I really must have had my head buried deep in the sand all this time. I’m so stupid to have
lived in a fairytale world, more worried that my damn mask might fall off and reveal the lies I hid, rather than seeing my life for all that it was-one big fat lie. Our lives have been shaken and rattled because of deceit. Daddy always taught Carly and me to stay strong, love hard and be proud of everything we do. I have no idea how he managed to teach us those three things when he wasn’t strong enough to be honest with himself about the lies he kept. He didn’t love us enough to protect us. And he was so ashamed of his own son that he hid his identity. Who does that?

The nurse comes in to make her rounds, so Carly and Colton tell me they’ll come back later to check in on me.
The nurse removes the catheter, checks my vitals then walks me through the hallway before helping me settle back in my room.

I lay my head back against the
fluffy pillow and close my eyes as exhaustion sets in. My mind is a jumbled cluster of thoughts and I just want to push it all aside. The physical pain pales in comparison to the soul crushing heartache that I feel. I feel raw and empty.

The door swings open wide and Brailee and Braden bursts into the room, with tears streaming down their smiling faces. “Momma!” They scream as they rush towards my bed.
I wrap my arm around my babies and hold them tight kissing all over their faces. It hurts so bad to move, for them to pull and tug on me, but having my babies in my arms, knowing their safe pushes the pain to the back of my mind. Looking up I see Luke in the corner by the door watching us with a small smile on his face. I smile back at him, wipe the tears from my face and mouth “thank you.”

RECOVERY

re•cov•ery noun \ri
-ˈkə
-
və
-
rē
,
-ˈkə
v-
rē
\

: the act or process of becoming healthy after an illness or injury : the act or process of recovering

: the act or process of returning to a normal state after a period of difficulty

: the return of something that has been lost, stolen, etc.

How do you recover from a lifetime of pain? 

I’ve heard people say they are broken when the going gets tough, giving up on life. But for me, the going got tough, the tough chickened out and blew this Popsicle stand like there was no tomorrow, leaving behind a weakened, defenseless woman. 

So here I am recovering not just from taking the beating of my life, being left behind by my bastard husband for dead. I’m also recovering from the lifetime of heartache and pain I’ve endured; recovering from the lies I was told for far too
long. I’m recovering from ten years of my life stolen by a devious bastard, whose intent was to bend me, break me, and shatter me. He fully completed his mission, but he didn’t count on the fact that although I transformed into a lifeless shell, that somewhere deep inside there was still a glint of courage, a small sliver of strength left in my frail body.

After spending
six days in the hospital, I was finally released. Luke and the kids picked me up from the hospital and after an impromptu stop for ice cream, he brought us to Daddy’s house where Colton is unpacking the rest of the boxes from my old house. Carly is still on bed rest, so she sits perched on a barstool with her legs crossed beneath her butt barking out orders like she’s the damn Queen of England. It fits her bossy ass, what can I say?

Calling my childhood home
home
again after all these years feels strange. I feel like everything I’ve ever known to be truth has been in fact a lie and all those lies began here. Everyone notices my uneasiness and slips on the kid gloves, handling me with care. Colton insists on ordering pizza for dinner, so I wouldn’t try to cook. Carly insists on baking cookies with the kids after they bathed. Luke insists on staying. I literally laughed in his face, because I thought he was kidding. He had spent six nights in the hospital watching my every move. Was he not sick of me by now?

When Carly,
Colton and Heidi Jo leave, I say goodbye to Luke, pushing him out the front door behind them. I’m not trying to be mean, but after a week without my kids I need time alone with them. Time to explain the changes that are taking place in our lives.

We all pile
up in the bed with a plate full of cookies and glasses of chocolate milk. The twins are young, but not seeing Josh for a week while I was in the hospital was enough to open up their line of questioning. I debated for days on what to tell them, but I quickly realized that our lives had been ripped apart because of lies, and I can’t continue that vicious cycle regardless of how painful the truth might be. Once they finish their snacks, I set the plates and glasses on the nightstand before gathering my strength to crush their littler hearts.

“Babies, there is no easy way to tell you two what needs to be said. First, I want you both to know that Mommy and Daddy love you two with everything in our
hearts.” Brailee and Braden nod their heads. “Daddy won’t be coming home for a very long while. We’re gonna live here, and we’ll pick up the pieces and put our lives back together.”

“Where’s Daddy? Where’s he gonna live?
” Braden asks, and my heart cracks for my sweet little boy. He clings to Josh’s side every chance he gets and knowing that he won’t have his Daddy to teach him to grow into a man is bittersweet. I’m glad that he won’t have the types of influences that Josh would teach him, but nonetheless every little boy needs a man in their life.

“Little man,
I don’t know where Daddy is gonna live, but he won’t be with us. Momma’s gonna take good care of you though.” I don’t lie, because I have no idea what prison Josh will be living at and I really don’t care.

“Will we still get to see Uncle Drew? He can take care of us while Daddy’s away?” Brailee asks.

“No baby. We can’t see Uncle Drew. I’m sorry.” The twins immediately fall apart and each tear that falls from their sweet little eyes rips my heart a little more. I know their hearts hurt as much as mine, but I have to do what’s best to keep my babies safe. I hold them both until their cries soften and they fall asleep.

Around two AM
I get out of bed to take some pain medicine. Sleep is fighting me so hard tonight. After checking the locks on the front door, I trudge back down the hall towards my bedroom. When I hear the chains on the porch swing rattle, I stop and listen closer, holding my breath. The springs squeak, followed by more chain rattling. Panic creeps up my back and I slowly make my way to the bedroom to get my phone. I don’t want to call nine-one-one since it might just be a stray dog, or my imagination. I don’t want to call Colton because he has a pregnant wife at home to care for. Picking up my phone I walk back into the hallway and listen closely. The porch swing rattles again and I quickly dial Luke’s number pressing send.

“Sweetheart, what’s wrong?”
He asks answering on the first ring.

“The porch swing is rattling. I’m scared.”

“What?” He chuckles.

“It sounds like someone is on the porch swing, Luke.”

“Sweetheart, open the front door.”

“What? Are you crazy? I’m scared. I know it’s late but can’t you come over and double check the house for me, please?”
I whine. Luke sighs and I’m sure he thinks I’m crazy now.

“Sweetheart, listen to me.
Walk to the front door and open it. Can you do that, Savannah?” I whimper into the phone. “Savannah, scoot.”

I slowly scoot
as he requested towards the front door. “I swear if I get axed by my psycho bastard brother or one of his hit men, I’m hauntin’ your ass, Luke.” I whisper and Luke laughs into the phone again. My chest heaves nervously as I unlock the front door and twist the door knob.

“Savannah, ya gonna open the door?”
Luke asks and his voice echoes. I pull the door open and slowly peek out the crack. Luke smiles at me from the porch swing, his dark brown hair a disheveled mess.

“Told ya I’d stay, swee
theart.” He says reaching his arm out to me. I shuffle my feet slowly across the wooden planks and sit beside Luke on the porch swing. He tucks me under his arm and kisses my forehead. My eyes flutter closed and a tears slips down my cheek. “Don’t cry, sweetheart. I didn’t mean to scare ya. You wouldn’t have been scared had you not been so damn stubborn and just let me sleep on the couch.” Slowly pushing off with the balls of his feet, the swing sways back and forth.

“I didn’t know it was you.” I mutter against his chest.

“Savannah, listen to me.” He says tilting my face so that I’m forced to look at him. “I’ve watched you suffer enough. He can’t hurt you now. I know you’ll be safe as long as I’m close by.”

“Luke, you can’t just sleep on the porch swing. I’ll be fine, really. Go on home.”
I yawn, the rocking motion of the swing nearly lulling me to sleep.

“Hell no. I’m stayin’
right here.” He brushes my hair down my back. “Havin’ a hard time sleepin’ tonight?”

“Uh huh,” I hu
m as my eyes grow heavy. Luke continues to rock the swing back and forth.

“Sleep, sweetheart.”

I made it through a marriage to Josh Moore, but I promise you the divorce just might be the death of me. Carly introduced me to her attorney, Michele Runyon and she is working to have the divorce finalized as quickly as possible. The paperwork is never ending. I don’t know half the assets we share, or what accounts he has where. Josh handled everything. Luckily, my name ain’t attached to Josh’s company, Black Pike. I told Michele he could have everything, I just want to wash my hands of what life we shared together and never look back.

Daddy left me a thick bank account
that I’ll use to take care of the kids until I’m comfortable enough with leaving them to return to work at the hospital. Although I know it’s blood money, I’d rather use it to support my kids than to spend one damn dime of anything Josh Moore has. Or had, rather. Michele tells me that since Black Pike is under a class action law suit and there is enough evidence of criminal intent on the company’s part, most all of his assets will be seized until a ruling is made in the case. Michele promises me that the divorce should be swift and I’ll be able to move forward with my life quickly.

Brailee is adjusting well to living here, Braden on the other hand is having a hard time with Josh’s absence.
He’s a Daddy’s boy and although Josh traveled a lot, the kids still talked to him nightly before bed; something they haven’t done in three weeks. I’ve tried everything I can think of to make the transition easier on him. He does fine through the day, but wakes up almost every night crying for Josh. I wake up to his screams and cuddle him closer to me to hush his cries, then sob quietly to myself. It hurts so bad that Braden wants the one person who caused our family all this pain. But my baby boy just don’t understand the painstaking reality.

Luke slept on the front
porch the first week we lived here before I finally ran him home. After falling asleep next to him on the porch swing that first night, I was confused when I woke up the next morning in my bed with the front door locked. I searched all through the house for Luke before checking the last place I expected him to be; still on the front porch. Any other man would have passed out on the couch, ignoring my disapproval. But Luke ain’t like any other man I’ve ever met. He’s compassionate and thoughtful; two qualities that I’m truly not used to experiencing.

The following six nights were much like the first. After calming Braden dow
n from his nightmares, I’d tip toe out to the porch swing and sit with Luke until sleep found me. We rarely spoke a word those seven nights. Each morning I woke up in my bed with the front door locked and a huge man sleeping on my porch swing. It was almost comical seeing his large body scrunched up in the small five foot long porch swing, his arm bent over his face to shield the blinding sun from his eyes each morning. Why a man would suffer like that, sleeping on a porch swing through the hot summer nights is beyond me. I cooked breakfast for him a few times and he played in the yard with the kids like it was an everyday adventure that he looked forward to. It was nice having someone watching over us, because I truly feel safe when he’s close. But I don’t want to depend on a man as a safety net. I’ll find my strength soon enough, like everything else it will just take time.

Explaining
how I felt to Luke was hard. The last night he spent on the porch swing I found my way out here after getting Braden back to sleep. I sat down beside him and with one inhale of his woodsy scent I melted against him. He kissed the top of my head and sweetly muttered,
“goodnight sweetheart,”
as he rocked the swing back and forth. Realizing what was happening I quickly sat up and fought through chest wracking sobs as I laid it all on the line. How he understood anything I said as my voice cracked with each word is beyond me. I told him that I appreciated everything he had done for me, but I needed time to learn to stand on my own two feet; I don’t need to depend on a man. I told him that just because I don’t want him sleeping on my front porch, doesn’t mean that I don’t want him around at all. He understood but I won’t deny that my heart splintered seeing anguish wash over his baby blues.