Life Is Short But Wide (26 page)

“How lonely must I be?”

When he turned the motor on in his fancy new truck, he thought he might go to one of the new chi-chi clubs, but he thought of Wanda. He didn’t want to see her and remind himself of the twenty-something years he had lost with her. So he went home to his books and the television. “Well, at least I am safe. Can’t catch nothing sleeping by yourself.”

But, on the way to his home, his car, somehow, turned a few corners and stopped in front of a woman’s house. A woman he knew to be clean, fresh, almost honest, and mature; but she begged too much. He relaxed his body anyway, for a little while. He drove home thinking, “God, I know you see me, but I’m still not in love. That wasn’t love, God.”

He prayed and talked to God through the years.

Cloud had worked on Bertha’s house when the laborers had worked on Myine’s house. He had plenty of material left over to work with, so the house was looking better as time went by, and it was more comfortable. A few more shelves were added to the kitchen, more needed cabinets throughout the little house. Bertha and Juliet made curtains, tablecloths, face and hand towels for their own use.

Bertha was not working except on really good paying, little jobs. Her body was worn, and many ailments held her back from doing what she knew had to be done. She didn’t see a doctor often; there just was no money for that. She didn’t complain; she kept her pains to herself.

Myine was steady in her college work; she had to be, because she had lost so many years. She
had passed all the necessary tests, and now she was keeping up with the class for the past few years.

Money was stretched, and in short supply, but everyone managed on the garden they all worked in and nurtured. The fruit trees gave abundantly with Cloud’s care. He knew about all those things, and since he wanted to be around Juliet, he was always working at something.

Bertha liked Cloud, but didn’t want Juliet to think of being with him or anyone. “You ain’t strong like other girls, Juliet. First thing ya do is have a baby, and that would kill both a’ us.”
Juliet had been having her menstrual period ever since she was nine or ten years old. We tributed it to her broken body-, it has never stopped! Even now.

Juliet loved Cloud. She didn’t fuss with her mother, she just let time go by, telling herself, “We always together anyway.” But she did want to marry her man. She thought Cloud was handsome. “Somebody else could get him from me.”

TeeTee and Dolly, Tonya’s daughters, came by to eat, now and then, and to try to borrow a little money from Myine. Bertha told her, “First time you give them something, they ain’t never gonna stop beggin ya, they be here everday!” But Myine knew that; she spent any extra money on Lola. Usually she spent it on books for her classes.

Once, Dolly thought if she told Myine she was not going to let Lola stay with Myine any longer without Dolly being there, that Myine would let Dolly come back, too. “I can’t keep leavin my chile. I miss her too much. I need to be round her. Lets us both raise her up.” But the answer was a steady “No. You’re late. She is raised.”

Then Dolly pretended to be taking Lola away. Actually, Dolly
liked to died at the thought of all her time, and little money, having to be spent on her Lola. One day after Dolly took Lola away, Dolly came right back to leave Lola with whoever was there at the time. Bertha was there. Dolly said, as she rushed in, “Mz. Bertha, I got a little bizness to take care of is all. I’ll be right back; honest!” She didn’t come back for several weeks, and then just to eat a meal. Finally all the play ended and in the end Myine had Lola to finish raising alone.

That was alright with Bertha and Juliet; they had always helped with Lola, so Myine could go to school with a free mind. When Lola was with Juliet, she was well behaved, even doing her homework for school, and helped in little jobs in the house.

Around that time Myine got her certificate and started her little classes for children. She did pretty good, too. Then … they heard from Tante again. Tante was sending her daughter, Monee, to Wideland to have a baby that was not by the rich man Tante wanted her daughter to marry. The father was someone Monee loved, but that was not what Tante wanted for her daughter. She wanted that money.

When Monee’s daughter was born, Tante called Monee to come home right away, back to France without the baby. And, Tante said, she would send some money from time to time. But Tante reminded them, “Remember, I left a large sum of money, when I visited you, to save for our family estate. My daughter is part of the estate.” Monee had named the darling new little baby Poem.

Myine, with Bertha helping what little she could, and Juliet, just carried right on; didn’t miss but one or two steps. They would go on that way for several years. Everybody maybe didn’t prosper, but they weathered the storms.

Then without notice Monee came to get her baby, little Poem. She had married the man Tante wanted her to marry, and she was taking Poem back pretending it was Myine’s child and they would be helping the poor side of Tante’s family.

You see, so much was happening to all these people that you can’t tell it out straight! So I’m doin the best I know how. Ain’t people something, chile? Now, let me get back to Herman, Myine, Juliet, and Cloud.

Herman usually stopped by Juliet’s and Bertha’s house every few days to sit and talk. He liked Cloud; Cloud always seemed to be busy. But he knew Cloud did not make very much money from the odd jobs he found to do. From his own experience, he knew Cloud needed a steady income.

He began to bring carborators and other automotive parts from his job to teach Cloud how to clean them. Soon there was a steady supply. “These parts sit around for ages waiting for someone in the shop to work on them. I can get you a little money if you decide to do the work.”

Cloud did good work, quick and steady. Herman supplied the cleaning solvents and gas to do the cleaning. He paid Cloud well, from his own pocket until the owner of the shop noted the difference in the “junk,” with the old parts looking
clean and ready for use; he agreed to pay for the jobs, by the piece. Herman agreed, and made arrangements with Cloud.

Cloud built a nine-by-nine concrete platform behind Bertha’s house to keep the parts on, so he wouldn’t “mess up the yard!” as Bertha said. He even built a small storeroom to keep the solvents in for safety. It wasn’t long before he was buying his own supplies. He grew to love Herman like a blood brother.

Cloud was able to save a good amount of money over time. Bertha welcomed the money Juliet was extremely happy to give her. Juliet was proud of her Cloud. “My man,” she called him.

But every day, Bertha was becoming more obviously ill. She seemed to be shrinking, more wrinkled, dry, and weak. They had to physically stop her from trying to drag herself to the few jobs she had that she wanted to keep. “Mama, that money is not as important as you are. We going to send you to a doctor! At last!”

Juliet had the money from Cloud for the doctor. They called on Herman to drive Bertha. Juliet now had an electric wheelchair, and she went with Bertha after Herman and Cloud helped her get in the truck.

Herman was glad Juliet was coming with them; he knew the prognosis would not be a good one, and he did not want to be the bearer of bad news. He also knew that Cloud wanted to marry Juliet, and Juliet was getting old her own self. She would not marry Cloud while Bertha was alive. “It is stupid,” Herman thought, “but what are you going to do with some people? That woman has a life she is not living because of her mother.” He also knew Cloud and Juliet were already lovers.

A few days later, when everyone knew Bertha’s time was any time at all, Herman talked to Bertha. “Why don’t you sit out here
by your garden, and tell that young man Cloud to help you, to do your planting? He can dig, and you can talk as you sit out here in the sun amongst your trees. All this fresh air will give you a good night’s sleep!”

Bertha answered, “I got to work!”

Herman answered back, “You don’t pay any rent; you plant what you eat. Anything else you need, I’ll give it to you.”

“I got to take care this here child!” Bertha seemed stubborn, but she was trying to find some way to still be useful.

Now, Herman was stubborn. “Juliet is no child. She is about as old as Tante is. I bet she is almost fifty years old, if not more. She needs to be married while she can, and you let her husband take care of her.”

“Who gonna marry her? You, Mr. Herman?”

“You know Cloud loves her, Bertha.”

“Cloud is a Indian. He ain’t gonna be able to take care Juliet.”

“He already does, Bertha.”

Bertha waved him away. “I want her to marry a good Negro man. A colored man. A Black man; whatsomever they calls em these days.”

“It isn’t about what you want, Bertha. What does she want?”

Bertha sighed, saying, “She don’t know what she want. She too young, and foolish.”

“Juliet hasn’t been foolish since she was born. You are the foolish one, Bertha. You know you like Cloud, and you know you and Myine are getting older. Who is going to take care of Juliet when you die?”

But Bertha ambled away on her old arthritic legs, saying, “You betta get on way from me, talking all that foolishment.”

Juliet would not marry Cloud until her mother gave her permission and blessings.
(She was already blessed, she had that man!)

Herman went on about his own business, or he would work on the little rooms Rose and Irene had used as a classroom. He liked to be there; he felt at home there. Myine was there, but he dared not say anything to her.