Little Darlings (28 page)

‘Daddy, Daddy, my Daddy!' she cries.

Mum runs to the door too, we all do, but when we see the car at the front of the driveway we stop. There's Dad getting out, wearing that cowboy hat,
already holding out his arms to Sweetie – but there's someone else in the car.
He's brought Lizzi Big Mouth with him
.

Mum cries out, grabs Sweetie and Ace, pulls them inside and slams the front door shut. ‘How
dare
he bring her here again!' she says.

‘Mummy, please, let me go to see Daddy!' Sweetie says frantically.

‘No, absolutely
not
. I'm not having you kids contaminated by that little tramp,' says Mum, and she bolts the door.

It's ridiculous: there's Sweetie and Ace screaming to get out and Dad thumping on the door to get in. I'm shivering in the hallway, not sure what I want, just wishing we were a proper family again. I wouldn't even mind if we were all pretending, the way we do for a photo shoot.

It's so silly anyway, because Dad simply strides right round the house to the back door by the kitchen and Margaret lets him in right away. So here he is, coming back up the hallway, and Mum can't stop Sweetie and Ace running to him and giving him a huge hug, their arms and legs wrapped right round him like little monkeys. I hang back, but Dad looks over Sweetie's shoulders and says, ‘How about a hug from my big girl?' I burst into tears and rush to him too.

All this time Mum is screaming, ‘Get out, get out, I'm not having that girl in my house!'

‘Whose house?' says Dad. ‘
My
house, Suzy. Now get a grip – she's not coming in, not just now. Stop the silly noise, you're upsetting the kids.'

‘How dare you say that when you're the one who's broken their hearts, not coming to see them for a whole
week
.'

‘Well, I'm here now. Where's the nanny? I want their little cases packed. I'm having them for the weekend. You'd like that, wouldn't you, kids?'

‘No you don't! You can't just waltz in and whisk them off like this. I don't even know where you're staying.'

‘I'm at the Lane Hotel. I've got a suite. The kids will love it. Wait till you see the bathtub, Sweetie, it's just like a swimming pool!'

‘Is she staying there too, that little tramp?'

‘Stop calling her names, Suzy, it's pathetic. Yes, as a matter of fact she is staying there. So what?'

‘Then they're not going, I won't have it! What are you
playing
at, Danny? I'm your
wife
.'

‘Look, let's not go into this now. I'm trying to think of what's best for the children. I'm going to be renting a place soon, somewhere with a garden so the kids can run around – and we're
going to need to have serious talks about
this
house eventually.'

‘What? You're trying to steal the children away – and now you're taking the
house
?'

‘Let's just take this one step at a time. We'll get everything sorted fair and square. I'm perfectly willing to provide for you and the kids. I'll be truly generous, no worries, but you know I've lost a lot of money because of the recession. Things will pick up once I get the new album launched—'

‘There isn't going to
be
a new album! Your career's over, you wizened old fool. You're just a laughing stock now,' Mum shouts.

‘Right, that's it. I'm not hanging about to be insulted. Come on, kids. Never mind your stuff, we can always buy you new clothes. We're going.'

‘Oh no you're not! There's guys with cameras outside. What will it look like, you dragging three screaming kids away from their mother – you with your Mr Nice Guy Family Man image nowadays. What would your precious Rose-May say to that?'

‘Look, Suzy, grow up. What's the point of making this so ugly? See what you're doing to the kids? You'd better watch it. You've clearly had a drink or two – or ten. If you don't clean up your act you'll find I'll fight you for custody of the kids. I've got myself a very good lawyer. You'd better start
cooperating. The kids are coming with me now, and if you have hysterics in front of the paps you'll simply be helping my case. I'll bring them back tomorrow afternoon. Come on now, kids.'

He lifts Sweetie in one arm, Ace in the other, and starts walking.

‘Don't you go too, Sunset,' Mum says, hanging onto me.

I hover helplessly, not knowing what to do. My heart's pounding and I feel sick. Mum's asked me to stay, she needs me – but Sweetie and Ace need me too. Dad doesn't have a clue how to look after children. They won't be able to manage without me.

‘I'll have to go, Mum. Don't worry, I'll look after Sweetie and Ace,' I say. ‘I'm not taking sides, I love you both. Please don't be cross with me, Mum . . .'

But she turns away from me and won't say goodbye to any of us, not even Sweetie.

Then we're bundled into the back of the car and we hurtle out of the gates, Dad telling us to duck down. He laughs as he speeds away, waving his cowboy hat and then plonking it on Lizzi Big Mouth's head. She laughs with him and then looks round at us.

‘Hey, kids!' she says, waving her fingers in the air.

We stare at her. We don't wave back.

‘Who are you?' Sweetie asks indistinctly, her thumb in her mouth.

‘I'm Lizzi, sweetheart. I'm your dad's girlfriend,' she says.

‘I'm Sweetie, not sweetheart. And
I'm
Daddy's girlfriend,' says Sweetie.

Dad roars with laughter. Lizzi Big Mouth laughs too, her horrible lips wide open, as if she could swallow us up in one gulp.

‘You're my little sweetheart, Sweetie. Liz can be my
big
one,' says Dad.

‘What about Sunset?' says Sweetie. ‘
She's
your big girl, not
her
.'

‘Oi, little Miss Sulky Chops, I'm not
her
, I'm Lizzi,' she says. She pulls a face at Sweetie, then raises her eyebrows at me.

‘Hi, Sunset. You were very kind to my little niece – unlike
some
members of your family. Thanks for giving her that panda. It was sweet of you.'

I don't want her to feel I'm sweet. I don't reply. I hold Sweetie's hand and Ace's grubby paw in solidarity. Ace shuffles nearer to me.

‘I don't like her,' he whispers, not quietly enough.

I don't either
, I mouth.

‘I'm Tigerman and I'm going to
bite
her,' he says.
Then he looks down at himself, stricken. ‘I want my Tigerman costume!'

‘Oh, Dad, Ace needs his Tigerman outfit. He'll never settle without it. Can we go back for it?' I say.

‘Don't be silly, Sunset.'

‘But it'll only take five minutes—'

‘I'm not going through all that palaver with the paps and your mother screaming her head off. I've told you, we'll stop off somewhere and buy you all new clothes, OK? And stop taking that tone with Liz, all of you. I want you to be very, very nice to her, because she's a very, very nice girl, OK?'

Of course it isn't OK. She's not the slightest bit nice. She's stolen our dad and she doesn't seem to care. Ace starts crying and Sweetie starts fidgeting. I hope she's not going to wet herself again. I'm starting to feel horribly sick. One way or another it seems likely we're going to make a mess of Dad's upholstery.

He drives us to Harrods again, trying to turn it into a treat. At least we can all go to the bathroom. Lizzi Big Mouth comes into the ladies' with us. She doesn't try to supervise Ace or Sweetie. She just stares at herself in the mirror and applies another shiny dark coat of lipstick to her big mouth.

‘You wear too much lipstick,' says Sweetie.

‘That's your opinion but you're just a silly little girl,' says Big Mouth.

‘I'll tell Daddy you said that,' says Sweetie.

‘Tell away, darling. See if I care,' she says.

She's so sure of herself. She doesn't even flatter Dad when she's with him. She just shrugs when he asks her to help us find new clothes, and says, ‘
I
don't know what little kids like.
You
kit them out. It was your idea to have them with us for the weekend.'

Dad calls an assistant over quickly and Lizzi wanders off humming, messing around with the clothes on the rails, not the slightest bit interested.

Sweetie perks up now and starts to organize a new top and trousers and frilly nightie for herself, and then decides she simply
has
to have some little suede boots with heels. They don't make them as small as Sweetie's size but she wants them anyway, saying she'll stuff socks in the toes.

I know what I want too. It's easy: a new black T-shirt, black jeans and even new lacy mittens because the first ones are starting to tear. I'd like black pyjamas too but I can't find any. I have to make do with navy blue.

Ace is much more difficult to please. The assistant tries hard with him, offering him army khaki or bright scarlet, but he's not interested in
ordinary clothes. He wants a Tigerman costume and we can't find one anywhere. He starts crying and he won't stop.

‘For God's
sake
, Ace, what's the matter with you?' Dad shouts.

He picks out a T-shirt, shorts and pyjamas for Ace, not bothering to let him choose. Ace is in despair. I pick him up and he sobs into my neck. I have a sudden idea.

‘Dad, can we go to the toy department?'

‘The
toy
department? You kids, you're always after something. Aren't you getting a bit old for toys, Sunset?'

‘It's not for me, Dad. I've thought of something we could get Ace. I promise it's only little, not at all expensive.'

‘Ace doesn't deserve anything – he's acting like a spoiled brat,' says Dad, but he gives in.

Lizzi huffs and sighs when he says we're going to the toy department, but she acts like she loves it when we get there. She and Dad muck around with the teddies, making them bob about and talk to each other. It is seriously embarrassing, but I ignore them and search hard, holding Sweetie's hand and lumbering Ace along on my hip. Then I find what I'm looking for: face paints!

‘Here you are, Ace, this will do the trick!' I say.

He stops grizzling to peer at the tin. ‘That's make-up!' he says. ‘That's not for boys.'

‘No, no, it's magic sticks of paint for your face. I'm going to paint you. I'm going to use the orange stick and the black stick, with maybe the pink stick for the nose – and guess who you'll be?'

Ace shuffles uncertainly. ‘I don't know.'

‘Of
course
you know. You'll be Tigerman!' I look at Sweetie. ‘And I'll paint you too, with blue shadow for your eyes and red lipstick, and you'll be a fairy-tale princess.'

I take them back to Dad, both smiling. I want him to say, ‘Thank you so much for calming them down, Sunset. You're so good with your brother and sister. What would I do without you?' But surprise surprise, he just smiles back at us and buys the face paints, saying mildly, ‘What do you want them for?'

So I start to tell him, and he nods a bit, but I know he's not really listening, and then he's distracted anyway because two silly grannies start squealing and blushing like schoolgirls, begging him for his autograph. Big Mouth laughs at them, raising her eyebrows at us. She's more interested in the face paints.

‘Oh, cool! I love face paints! I used to run the face-paint stall at my school fête. I love doing it.
Wait till we get back to the hotel, you three, and I'll make you all up.'

‘They're
my
face paints. I want to do it,' I say childishly.

She shrugs. ‘OK. No probs. You do it, Sunset.'

So when we get to Dad's hotel suite (which is
huge
, like an apartment, with so many flowers and ornaments and fancy bits I'm terrified Ace will knock them all over), I have a go at painting Ace's face like a tiger. It's much more difficult than I thought. I can't get the stripes to go right and he doesn't look fierce enough.

‘You're Tigerman now, Ace. Oh goodness, I'm scared of you!' I say nevertheless, but he scowls at himself in the mirror, not convinced.

I try with Sweetie too, but the colours are too strong and she doesn't look like a fairy princess at all. She looks like a pantomime dame. Her chin quivers when she sees herself.

‘Maybe it was a silly idea,' I mutter. ‘I'll wash it all off.'

‘Have a wash in my big bath,' says Dad.

It's an enormous bath made of blue marble. The water comes out of the silver dolphin taps already blue too! There are all sorts of soaps and shampoos and bubblebaths. I wish I could lie back in the bath all by myself and pretend to be a movie star, but
I'm stuck with Sweetie and Ace. I don't even take all my clothes off to get in the bath because I'm worried Dad or Big Mouth will come in. Sweetie and Ace strip off and splash around and pretend to swim and cheer up considerably. I'm anxious when a lot of the face paint is wiped off on the snowy white towels, but Big Mouth Liz shrugs again when she sees.

‘We'll get housekeeping to bring us more,' she says.

She's eyeing up her face in the mirror, putting on more lipstick. I bet she gets that all over the towels too.

‘Could you do my face so it looks
properly
like a princess?' Sweetie asks her.

I'm taken aback by her betrayal. Liz paints her a
beautiful
princess face, with little blue and lilac flowers on her cheeks, silver stars round her eyes, and a tiny blue butterfly shimmering on her forehead. Sweetie is delighted, running around in just a towel to show Dad. He bows to her and acts as if he's blinded by her beauty. Then it's Ace's turn. Big Mouth turns him into a magnificent Tigerman. She can do all the stripes the right way. She can even manage whiskers, and she makes him look comically fierce. I remember how she held Ace in her arms at the premiere of
Milky Star
. It's only a
few weeks ago but it seems like years now, so much has happened since.