Read Locket full of Secrets Online
Authors: Dana Burkey
“No,” I said in a mix of shock and confusion. “You couldn’t have been shot. You carried me into the Embassy.”
“I knew I needed to get you to safety, so I kept going,” he explained. “I wasn’t conscious much longer after you passed out in the lobby.”
I replayed the scene in my mind. It was blurry, but I could remember the guards yelling and talking to Steven. I remembered the blinding pain in my leg and trying to talk without much success. Then I remembered the blood. It was on Steven, covering most of his shirt. I had assumed it was from my leg when he was carrying me. But there was so much of it. Could it have been from a bullet wound?
“Where were you hit?” I asked, praying it was a graze or somewhere easy to fix, like his arm.
“The bullet went through my chest. It hit my left lung on the way through,” he explained evenly. “It grazed one of my ribs, but thankfully was a few centimeters from hitting my heart.”
“Olena never told me,” I whispered, suddenly weighed down with emotions. “Why didn’t she tell me?”
“I asked her not to.” Steven shrugged. “I wanted to give you time. I assumed you were in the hospital or just getting home, so I asked her not to say anything to you about it. I knew when I got out of the hospital I could tell you myself, and by then you would have had a chance to process it all a little more.”
“So you waited all this time to tell me?” I found myself hurt that Steven and Olena did not tell me sooner. I was suddenly worried, thinking of Steven sitting in a hospital alone, with no parents or family members to comfort him.
“I came as soon as I could, honestly.” Steven glanced at the table, suddenly refusing to make eye contact with me. After all we had been through I knew he was hiding something.
“What do you mean?” When he refused to look at me I reached out and took his hand. “Steven, please.”
“Gevorg,” he said, finally looking at me.
“What?” I asked, not sure I had heard him.
“I’m not Steven,” he said with a sigh. “Steven was who I had to be after the men chasing us thought I died. Steven had to lie to you even when he didn’t want to. But I’m not him anymore. I’m Gevorg, or Gev. Anything but Steven.”
“Okay,” I tried again. “What do you mean you came as soon as you could, Gev?”
It felt weird to say his real name, but I watched a smile play on his lips. He clearly had been waiting for this moment for a while. With a deep breath, he reluctantly answered me.
“I was in the hospital in Kiev for almost a month after I was shot,” he said finally. “My lung had collapsed, and the doctors were having a hard time stabilizing it. They wanted to send me to Moscow for better care, but also needed to keep me in Kiev until Olena was found. By the time they found her and moved me, the damage was pretty severe. My lung had developed an infection, so I was back in danger for almost a month before I was back on the road to recovery. Even once I left the hospital my doctors wouldn’t let me fly. They said the change in cabin pressure would cause my lung to collapse again if I tried to come see you too soon. I was only cleared three weeks ago.”
My grip on his hand became tighter and tighter with each sentence he spoke. I could feel tears streaming down my cheeks again, but did not bother to wipe them away. For so long I was mad at him, angry that he would lie to me and that he didn’t even care to talk to me. I had asked Olena about him once, but she only told me that he was living in Moscow. I assumed he was moving on with his life, and that hurt more than I wanted it to. Now I knew the truth. He had almost died while making sure I got to safety.
“But you talked to the agents,” I said, trying to make sense of it all. “They said you told them everything.”
“I had to write it all down,” he explained. “I sat and wrote every second I could, only taking a break when the pain was too much and I had to be drugged again. I was so scared if I didn’t tell them everything it would mean you would be in more trouble, and everything would be for nothing.”
As Kathy returned to check my coffee cup, and likely make sure I was doing okay, I released my grip on Gev’s hand. My emotions were all over the board, and I was not sure how to recover from it all. On one hand, I wanted to go back to having someone I could talk to and truly understood all I had been through since my first reunion with Olena. On the other hand, there were a mountain of lies that our “relationship” had been built on.
“So what, I just forgive you now?” I asked once Kathy had walked away from our table.
“I wish,” Gev said with a little laugh. “I feel like nothing about us is that simple.”
“Well, what were you hoping for when you came here?” I held my hands firmly in my lap to prevent from taking hold of his once again.
“I want to start over,” he said, looking deep into my eyes. “I can’t ask you to forgive me for what happened. I just hope that if I can let you get to know the real me, over time you will be able to understand why I did what I did.”
“Start over?” I repeated, unsure it was that simple.
“Yeah,” he nodded. “I didn’t buy a ticket back to Moscow yet, so it’s up to you how long I stay. I can drive right back to the airport now if you want. But, if you will let me, I want to show you the real me. And show you that when I kissed you or held you or told you I cared about you, it was always true. I never lied about how I felt about you, including what I said in the lobby at the embassy.”
The confusion clearly showed on my face. I once again tried to remember everything about the moments before I lost consciousness. Straining, the only phrase I could remember him telling me was that he was sorry. Reading my expression, Gev leaned in closer to me, his voice just above a whisper.
“I love you, Claire,” he said in a serious tone. “I should have said it to you sooner, and should never have lied to you for so long. But even now, after all we have been through it’s still true. I love you.”
Taking a deep breath I closed my eyes and pressed my lips together. A few months ago I had said those same words to Gev. No, not to Gev, to Steven. But so much had happened since then. I would have loved to hear him say those words back on that day in Chernobyl. It would have been, in a way, less complicated then. Now, however, it was harder to respond one way or the other.
“Okay,” I finally managed, opening my eyes to look at Gev. “Let’s start over.”
“Is it really you?” I asked into the receiver as I lowered myself onto the couch to get comfortable.
“Very funny,” came the serious reply. I knew an eye roll likely accompanied it. “Are you watching?”
“Planning to,” I assured her, before covering the phone and calling out into the house. “Olena’s on the phone!”
“Oh yes, you have a few minutes,” Olena seemed to realize. “And you are recording it as well?”
“We have it set to record on the TV, and even have a VHS set up to go just in case.” This was the fifth time Olena has asked me this same question, the last requests in her e-mails.
“Good, that is good,” she said, sounding more nervous than I had ever heard her.
Before I could assure her it was going to be okay and that there was nothing to worry about, the phone was taken out of my hand.
“Hey!” I frowned, turning to give a dirty look.
“
Pryvit miy dvoyuridnyy brat,” Gev said into the phone, greeting Olena how he always did. He blew me a quick kiss in apology before turning and heading for the kitchen.
With a shake of my head I turned back to face the TV and made sure it was on the right channel.
After that first meeting with Gev in Perkins, my life changed instantly. After “visiting” me for a few months, Gev made his stay in Ohio permanent. He attended school locally, graduating with a history degree before getting a job at a private school. Teaching European history was a perfect fit for him, despite the fact he never really planned it. I, on the other hand, abandoned my dream of traditional college and instead obtained a cosmetology license. It allowed me to move on with my life without years of school, while still giving me something to take my mind off of everything that Olena was facing.
Once the news got out about the photos, things in Ukraine seemed to erupt overnight. The photos we uncovered showed men moving and storing weapons in reactor five. Once identified, three of the men were arrested for questioning. The other two had died in and after the accident. These first arrests and trials lead to the uncovering of hidden bank accounts, filled with money paid in secret. It led to tapes of conversations between leaders people had trusted and followed after the events in Chernobyl. Then, it finally led to the uncovering of the nuclear weapons that were in the photos. It was the biggest news story in all of Europe, and Olena was in the front row for it all.
Wanting to make a real difference, Olena chose to stay in Kiev, working with Hodwell and the other agents assigned to the case. She gave insight and information that proved to be invaluable, as well as putting a face to the story for so many working to find the truth. Olena e-mailed often, called when she could, and even visited a few times, but it was never the same as I thought it would be. I imagined her and I living together, or having dinner parties and going on vacation together. It was not easy at first, but with Gev’s help I made new plans. I began to accept that Olena needed to be in the Ukraine to finish all Uri had started when he took those photos so long ago.
Now, the documentary that shook the Cannes Film Festival was about to shake the world. Gev and I did not take part in the actual film, our names little more than a footnote in history. The movie about to play on national television was not about us though. It was about Olena and the people of Chernobyl getting the answers that were hidden for so long.
“
YA podzvonyu tobi, koly tse na,” Gev assured Olena as he sat down on the couch next to me. Apparently promising her we would call when the movie was over appeased her for now.
“Do skoroho,” I added, leaning in so I could be heard as well.