London Harmony: Squid Hugs (7 page)

She was a happy sort.  I grinned at her and Jen hugged onto my arm as I led us away.  Patty looped an arm in Jen's and asked, “You must tell me where you found those darling shoes.”

I rolled my eyes with a grin while they discussed all things shoe.

After we had returned, things got into full swing.  It was excruciatingly boring, listening to the speeches of their featured speakers.  Jen caught me playing an exciting round of tic-tac-toe on my napkin with my spoon, and slapped my hand.  I stuck my tongue out at her and tried to pay attention to the various stuffed suits as they went on about all the successes their teams have had.

Then finally, they started announcing the various awards.  I liked that part, I'm all for acknowledging people who put in the extra effort to excel at their jobs.  So I hammed it up a bit and applauded loudly for each.

One roguish looking man who looked like he worked out was awarded for his work on a cutting edge chemotherapy drug.  When he passed by our table in his tailor-fitted suit, he gave Jen a wink as he straightened his tie.  She watched him go past as she looked him up and down.  Then she turned to Patty and I and said with a smirk, “Nice arse.”

I gave a smile I wasn't feeling.  I mean sure, the man had a nice butt and would have had me drooling if I hadn't been so infatuated with Jennifer.  But it reminded me that it could never be.  This guy was just her type.  A well-dressed professional, gorgeous, and male.  I wondered if I were more like that, would Jen notice me?  I've changed my style once before, maybe I could do it again?

Then my obsession started getting excited when Grant announced, “The final award is for Outstanding Salesperson of the Year.”

He smiled as he looked over the crowd.

“This individual has repeatedly gone above and beyond all expectations in landing new accounts and servicing her existing accounts in her sales region, creating record sales and growth.  We are constantly told by our clients that they are impressed by her professionalism and in-depth knowledge of each product we offer.”

Grant turned his focus to Josie's table and announced, “She is a rising star here at Parker Pharmaceutical.  Everyone give a hand to our Outstanding Salesperson of the Year, Josephine Harrison!”

We stood and applauded and I gave a shrill whistle as an embarrassed looking Josie went up to accept the plexiglass award that was shaped like a flame.  She shook Grant's hand and the man stepped away from the mic a step and motioned her toward it.

She eloquently stated, “Bloody hell, I don't know what to say.  Thank you?”

We applauded her again as she did a silly sneak off the stage as Grant announced the end of the ceremony and wished everyone a good night.  He reminded everyone to not drive home, if they had been partaking of alcoholic beverages as he had, and to call a taxi instead.

I grinned as everyone went into motion.  You could tell the people who were just there for the free meal as they almost ran for the doors as others started circulating and hobnobbed with others, saying goodnight.  It would be havoc at the valet and Jen and I were happy to wait at our table until the herd thinned a bit.  Besides, we wanted a chat with the Outstanding Salesperson of the Year.

It wasn't long before she made her way to us and we stood and congratulated her.  She seemed really proud of the award that had her name engraved in the plexiglass.  And she should be.  The company was huge and she outworked and outsold the rest.  I admired people who excelled in their jobs.

Again he boyfriend was absent.  I prompted, “So where is this mysterious Jeff?”

She gave us a sour look and said, “One last pass at the open bar I'm afraid.”

We gave her sympathetic looks, and right on cue, a man in his late twenties came walking up, drink glass in hand, and obviously putting in an effort not to sway as he walked.  He wore black slacks, a nice white dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up, and an almost pencil thin charcoal grey tie.  His dark hair was styled immaculately and his chiseled chin was clean shaven.  Josie did good.

Josie looped an arm in his and started introductions.  “Jeff, this is my cousin, Jennifer Harrison, and our friend, Zilrita Marx.  Ladies, this is Jeffery Finnegan.”

He narrowed his eyes and looked down at her and asked in a drunken slur, “This is your cousin?  I thought you said he was some crossdresser queen.  The freak is almost bearable to look...”

My hand shot out in a fist and connected firmly with the asshole's nose.  I was enraged and seeing red.  All I wanted to do was to knock the guy's teeth in for his disparaging remarks about Jen.

My blow had barely even moved him but he dropped his glass on the floor to grasp his bleeding nose.  He slurred out, “Bloody hell you bint.”

I was growling something incoherent at him as I tried to swing again, but Jen was in front of me holding my arms, locking slightly amused eyes with me.  I tried to get around her but she pleaded with her eyes as she said, “Come on Zil, he's not worth it.  Let's just go.”

I growled toward the man then exhaled and tried to pull myself together.  I had never hit anyone in my life.  I would have been ashamed of myself if he hadn't denigrated my Jen.  I heard Josie behind us, snapping at the man as Jen led me through a staring and murmuring crowd, “That's it, we're through you tosser.  I'll find my own way home.”

Jennifer now had an arm around my shoulders as I took shuddering breaths, the adrenaline pumping through my veins bleeding off.  She was softly saying, “That's right, slow, deep breaths Zil.”

I was whispering over and over, “I'm sorry.”

Then Josie was on my other side and I looked over at her sheepishly and repeated, “I'm sorry.”

She rolled her eyes and said with a humor tinged voice, “What for?  The man was a wanker and deserved what he got.  I only wish it had been me to bloody his nose like that.”  Then she smirked. “Looks like I'm on the market again.”

I shook my head at her and promised, “I didn't mean to make a scene.”

She tilted her head and waved it off, saying, “Oh please Zil.  That was nothing compared to the scenes people make at the Christmas parties, and Jeff deserved it.”

Then she reached past me and laid a hand on Jen's arm, and said in earnest, “I'm so sorry about Jeff.  That wasn't at all what I had said.”

Jen just nodded and looked between us and said, “It was nothing compared to what I have endured my whole life.”  Then she smirked at me and said in a conspiratorial tone, “Though I didn't have Rocky here as a protector back then.”

We chuckled and I looked down at my hand and flexed it, and hissing out, “Ow.  I think I broke my thumb.”

Josie looked at my hand then hers and she made a fist.  Then she asked in confusion, “Your thumb?  Are you sure you're making a fist right?”

Then she changed her fist to put her thumb inside her fist instead of outside and she blurted an explosive chirp of laughter, “Good Lord Zil, you hit like a girl.”

I blushed and defended myself weakly, “Hey, it isn't like I go around punching people every day.”  Then I sobered and looked over into Jen's eyes and searched them as I asked, “Are you ok, Jen?”

She smiled at me with something unreadable in her expression and said softly and teasingly, “Yes Rocky.  I'm fine.  I'm worried about you.”  She took my hand and I winced as she looked at the swollen knuckle on my thumb, then said, “Let's get you to the hospital.”

I nodded as I took out my valet ticket then looked back to the banquet hall and said, “Wait, my parasol.”

Josie turned around, started back in, and called back over her shoulder, “I'm on the mission, be back in a flash.”  She rejoined us a minute later spinning the parasol on her shoulder.  We all exchanged grins then she closed it and handed it to me and I winced in pain.  Now that all the adrenaline was gone, my thumb really hurt.  It almost brought me to tears, but I forced them back.  Just what I needed, looking like a baby after I just embarrassed both women.

Josie offered to drive but I asked with the patient look of a mother at her, “Did you drink tonight?”

She sighed and nodded. “Two glasses of wine.”

Then I shrugged. “Then I'll be doing the driving, thank you very much.”

Jen almost protested but I cocked an eyebrow at little miss three glasses of wine.  She grinned and wisely kept her distractively tempting trap shut.

We continued the embarrassing night with the emergency room doctors telling me it was just a nasty sprain.  They put a little splint on it and wrapped it to reduce the swelling.  Then I got a prescription for some painkillers; which Josie proudly informed me she had sold the hospital pharmacy; and told to ice it when I got home.  Jennifer watched me intently the whole night and looked relieved when they said I'd live and would keep my thumb.

Josie kept apologizing to me for wanker-boy even though I was the one who didn't keep my cool.  I had never had such a primal reaction to anything in my life.  She was also assuring Jennifer that Jeff had twisted her words.

Jen assured her with a hand on her shoulder, “I know sweetie.”

Josie admitted, “I love you like a sister.”

And they hugged.

Mmmm, hugz.  I asked, “Grawl?”

And Jen, who speaks fluent Zilrita, opened an arm and included me into the hug.  I felt much better about the fiasco I had made of the night after that.

I dropped both ladies off at Jen's loft apartment above the coach house, Josie didn't feel like going home alone that night so asked to crash at Jennifer's.  Jen stayed out in the car for a moment and gave me a soft, satisfied smile before letting it slide crooked as she turned to walk off saying, “Get some sleep Rocky, busy day tomorrow.”

I snorted at her then headed home after a long, eventful day.  I looked at the splint on my thumb and shook my head and sighed knowing I'd do it again in a heartbeat if need be.

Then next day I was a complete and utter baby.  My thumb hurt!  I looked at my other hand and experimentally made a fist, then took my thumb out from it and shrugged.  Then I got ready for the day.

I stood in front of the mirror for a long time without my makeup on.  Could I be more like Jen's type?  I tried to imagine myself looking more professional, in a posh business suit like Jen wore, and my hair it's natural color.  I almost couldn't remember what color it used to be.  A dark honey blonde I think.  It has been jet black for over half my life now.

I had remade myself once, into this version of me, a better version than I had been.  I didn't know if I knew how to be anyone else than the person I have become after my rebirth.  But if I could just get Jennifer to notice me, maybe I could do it again.  Another stage in my development maybe?

I sighed and went about getting ready for the day in my normal goth attire.  I really did love it.  It made me feel free, and sassy, and... fun.  I know those three things were contradictory to the stereotypical goth, but it was me.  I had originally done it as I experimented around in my grief, I mean, it was all things dark, like my emotions.  But unfortunately, life excited me too much and I found myself smiling through the pain.

By the time I realized that the dark emotions burning in my heart were not in control of me, overwhelming me, I decided I loved the look and people's reactions to a cheerful goth.  It put smiles on their faces and I felt proud to have brightened their days.

I took one last look at myself and then headed out to pick up the unruly and fun receptionist at her bat cave.

After I picked her up, half way into our drive she took my free hand and I glanced over.

She tilted her head and inquired, “What's up, lady?  You're awfully quiet over there.  You still worried about last night?  Don't be.  I've suffered much worse than a frat boy who never grew up.”

I shook my head and gave a weak smile as I explained, “It's not that.  I was just thinking about things.  Didn't mean to dampen the party.”  I brightened my smile and used the controls on my steering wheel to turn on the radio.

I snorted at the song that was playing, June's J8 song, “Pickpocket.”  I wiggled my eyebrows at Jen and started singing along.  This seemed to alleviate the concern on her face and she sat back and sang along.  I noted as we laughed and sang, that she hadn't released my hand yet and heat was spreading through my entire being.

We arrived and opened shop.  As she disarmed the alarm, she tilted her head again to look at me., furrowing her brow as she stated, “You're still distracted.”

I smiled back at her and admitted, “Just a little introspection, I'll be fine.  Think about where you want to go to lunch.  Crafford's maybe?”

She nodded skeptically then countered, “Melting Pot?  You know seafood doesn't always agree with you.”

I nodded, I had only suggested it because it was one of her favorites.  Then changed my nod to a slight shake of the head and pointed out with a grin, “You and endless amounts of cheese?”

She sighed and surrendered.  “Cavendish's?”

I gave her a cheesy grin in agreement and started for the elevator.  She snorted and I looked back in curiosity as I walked.

She said with a wry grin, “We sound like an old married couple.”

I scrunched up my nose at her before disappearing into the back.  It was a long morning, and I had to take a couple pain pills during it to keep the thrumming ache from my messed up thumb at bay.  We lunched with a couple of the workers, introducing them to fine American diner food at the little retro diner.

I noted when we returned, that one of our house bands, the Purple Horseshoes had arrived to back up one of our artists.  It was the last day we could use our larger sound room for a day or two while the new boards were installed.  I thought about the band for a minute, our other house band was currently on a mini tour with Tammera Kyle, our Irish folk music talent.

I sent a text message to June.  “J-Dub, we need to think about another house band for Lunar Base Two so that the Horseshoes don't have to scurry all about town when the other studio needs them when Violet Rose is out of house.”

I got the expected response, she is constantly thinking of ways to improve the London Harmony experience, not just for the performers, but for the employees too. “I've had that on my mind for a while.  I was thinking about talking to the Roctoberfest third place finishers, the Bluebonnets wasn't it?  After we finished the construction there.”

I grinned and replied, “My thoughts exactly.  I just put it in my planner before I messaged you, to have someone drop a J-Card on the Bluebonnets after the lobby is finished.”

Her response was priceless, “You stinker.  I don't know why you even run this stuff by me when you already know what I'm going to say.”

I bounced in mirth and typed back. “It adds to my omniscient vibe.  Besides you know, you love me.”

I snorted at the expected, “Heaven help me but I do.  Things are too quiet over here without you running roughshod over the place.  I think everyone misses your hugs.  See ya soon brat.”

I smiled and signed off. “Love you wench.”

I had taken my splint off of my aching thumb, and I spent the rest of the afternoon dealing with miscellaneous contracts, dealing with company finances, and coordinating with Cornfed Potatoes Productions across the pond in Seattle to organize some music video shoots and some advertising.

I was in the zone, I felt important when I was firing on all cylinders like this like I made a difference for June and the company.  It was the feeling a young child has when they feel they are unstoppable.  I was derailed and almost fell out of my seat when Jen started talking from right behind me.  So much for unstoppable.

She said as I caught my breath, “You planning on working all night you silly bird?  Everyone has gone home already.  The technicians started the install an hour ago and are leaving for the night so I can set the alarm.  They said they need to turn off the breakers for the sound room tonight so their electrician can work on the hookups tomorrow.  I guess the fuse boxes are over in Walker's.”

I nodded and said with a smile, “I'm sure Mickey is going to be jealous until the main office gets its new equipment.”

She nodded with an evil grin.  The poor man took nothing but grief from an office where the women outnumbered men, two to one, but he loved every moment of it.

She prompted, “Ok then, shall we be about it then, Sally?  They should be leaving about now.”

I hopped up and gathered my things as I agreed, “Absolutely.”

She looped an arm in mine and said, “I'm glad you're feeling better.”

We got into the freight elevator and closed the cage and the doors.  The machinery started it grinding and groaning and lurched into motion.  I couldn't wait until the stairs were completed tomorrow.  I disliked this clunky old thing.

As if the contraption was reading my mind and took exception, it lurched to a halt halfway down and the light went out in the car.  The only illumination was the light from the slit in the doors and the dim battery powered emergency light located on the wall which came on.

For a moment, I thought there was a power outage, but then we wouldn't see light through the crack in the doors.  Then I realized what happened as Jen voiced it, “The bloody lift must be on the same circuits as the sound room.”

I nodded then said in resignation, “They'll be leaving then.”  We glanced at each other then, with what I would look back on later as humorous looks, turned to the doors, and started pounding on them as she called out, “Hello?  We're stuck in the elevator!  Can you hear us?  You turned the power out in it!”

I was banging and shouting, “Hello... hello?  We're stuck in here.”

After a couple minutes, we stopped and chuckled at ourselves.  I pulled out my cell and shook my head as I flexed my thumb while I mumbled, “I'll just have Eliza pop over to turn the breakers back on.”

That would have been a simple solution, Eliza was thirty seconds away, except for the fact that I was trying to use a cellphone in a big metal Faraday cage.  I had zero bars.

I looked at Jen and she pulled out her phone, then sighed and showed me the screen. She had zero bars as well.  Oddly I wasn't frightened at all.  I was stuck in an elevator with the sexiest woman I knew.  What a total and complete bummer... not.

Then I looked at the controls and grinned at her.  “Ah-ha.”  I opened the little access door and picked up the emergency phone receiver.  It would work as it was on battery power like the dim orange emergency light.

Jen lifted a finger and started to say, “Umm... Zil?”  I held my hand up and listened to the ringing on the line.  I slowly lowered it from my ear when I heard a faint electronic ringing from somewhere in the silent building.  I blushed as I realized what Jen was trying to say.

She gave an apologetic look and finished, “That rings through to the reception desk.”

We looked around and then I asked, “Isn't there supposed to be, like, a maintenance hatch or something?”

We looked up to the ceiling that was beyond our reach.  She chuckled. “Yup.  There it is.”

We both chuckled again, as if either of us could climb up the elevator shaft and open the doors up there anyway.  Especially Jen in her tight fitting business skirt.  Though it would be fun watching her try.  She clasped my hands, lacing our fingers and held on tightly.  I realized that she was scared and just trying to take it as humorously as I seemed to be.

I looked at her and assured her softly, “It's all going to be fine.”  I looked around then pulled her to the back wall and down to sit beside me, our backs to the wall.  “Looks like our night has been planned out for us.  Worst case, the employees will power us up in the morning.”

She hugged onto my arm for dear life.  Then I learned something new about the woman who fascinated me so much as she admitted, “I'm not really good in small spaces.  The popular boys used to stuff me in my locker back in secondary.”

I laid my head on top of hers to comfort her as I said, “That is unconscionable, but fear not, this is much bigger than a locker, and you have you very own Zilrita goth doll for company.”

She pulled back a bit to look at me with an amused smile on her strained face.

Then I freed my good hand from her death grip and stroked her hair as I observed, “You don't talk about your youth very much.”

She shrugged and replied, “There isn't much good in it.  Not until daddy understood me.  School was a living hell and I didn't have many friends.  The girls who would befriend me were teased by their friends.  My only real friend back then was my own cousin, Josie.  And I only got to see her a few times a year.”

She sighed and slumped back, relaxing a little and kept speaking.  “Then after mum and dad told his family that they decided to help me become the girl I always was inside, they sort of disowned us and forbade Josie to talk to me.  It wasn't until we were eighteen and adults that she was able to consort with me again.”

I wrapped my arm around her and pulled her in so she could lay her head on my shoulder. She continued in a faraway voice, “Josie always saw me for me.  Whenever we were together, she treated me just like I was any other girl.  She would sometimes switch clothes with me when we were playing, then we'd switch back before my folks picked me back up.  She and my mum seemed like they were the only people on my side.”

She smiled up at me for a second and said, “Though I'm pretty sure mum is gender blind.  I really believe she has always just seen me as her baby.  Boy, girl, it didn't matter to her.  And I always tried to get daddy's approval.  I cried happy tears all the time after we had that talk when I was eleven.”

Then she whispered, “He doesn't know that he is my hero.  He saved my life that day.  He never saw his straight razor which I had sitting next to me.  I had dressed in mother's things, trying to leave the world as the girl I felt.”

I stopped breathing then hugged her violently to me and kissed the top of her head as my eyes welled up with tears.  Thinking about the unimaginable anguish she suffered every day to be pushed that far.

Then she shrugged and said, “Everything was different at home then.  And as I developed more feminine characteristics as I matured, then more and more of the girls in school treated me as a peer.  Though the boys became even more violent except a few.  To most I was a curiosity, like an animal in a zoo, after my reassignment surgery.”

She smiled in memory and shared, “One boy in secondary, Gary McCartney, didn't believe the rumors nor the press.  He actively courted me, I felt like a real girl.  When he asked me on my first date, I had to explain to him before we got serious that I was transsexual.”

Her smile faltered. “People get confused between transgender, transsexual, and transvestite.  They think they are all the same.  Transgender is a person who identifies as a certain gender, being stuck in the physical body of the other.  Transsexual is the term used for a transgender who had reassignment surgery to reconfigure their sex organs to match that of their inner self.  Some people crudely call it a sex change operation, when it is changing nothing, it is just moving their physical self more in line with their perceived self.”

She laid her head back on my shoulder. “And transvestite is something altogether different and unrelated.  People have a more visceral reaction to transsexual, which is the label applied to me now, but I still use transgender since people seem more agreeable to that.  I think they wrongly associate transsexual with some sort of fetishism since it has 'sexual' in the name.”