âYou waitâ¦' Froggy said. He'd got a key in his hand, and was struggling to turn it in the lock. âTill you see inside.'
âHow did you get the key?' Jim asked.
But Froggy didn't enlighten him. âCome on,' he said.
It was mustily damp inside the cottage and there was white mildew on the backs of the four Windsor chairs set neatly round a table in the little living room, and patches of ironmould on the cushions that were piled neatly on a faded put-u-up. There were curtains at the windows, but they were full of dust and hung dispiritedly, and the window sills were decorated by several dead blue-bottles lying on their backs with their legs tangled above them.
âBelongs to my aunt,' Froggy said, adding unnecessarily, âhasn't lived in for years. Not since the war started. Come upstairs.'
They explored all three rooms of the little house, living room, kitchen and the bedroom upstairs, and shouldered
the back door open to stand in the sunshine in a little back garden beside an outdoor lavvy with a long wooden seat.
âWhat d'you think?' Froggy asked again.
âOught to be lived in,' Jim said, trying to keep his voice steady although his mind was spinning with hope, vibrating like an aircraft ready for take-off. Was it for rent? Could he afford it? Dare he even ask?
âI think it's wizard,' Froggy said. âJust the place for a love nest. Course we'd have to clean it up, spot of paint, elbow grease, that sort of thing, but can't you just see it? Right out the way, all on your own, just the two of you. Whizzo!'
Jim's hopes leapt into the air. It was just the place. He could see it all. He and Peggy sitting beside that fireplace, planning all the things they'd do when the war was over and they could build a new world. And their new world could start right here. He could soon get it cleaned up, paint it, put up new wallpaper, lime wash the lavvy. It would be like a new place. A new place for a new life. âBut it's your aunt's,' he said. âWould she let it?'
âShe would if I asked her,' Froggy said with great satisfaction. âShe sent me the key straight away. What d'you think?'
âAsk her,' Jim said. âYou're right. It's a wizard idea.'
âI'll write tonight,' Froggy said, shutting the back door.
And so will I, Jim thought. So will I. I'll tell Peggy I've got some good news but I won't say what it is, not with a thirty-six coming up. He couldn't wait to see her face when he told her. What a bit of luck! His heart was racing just to think of it. âThanks for letting me see it, Froggy,' he said. âYou're a brick.'
âSo what d'you think?' Megan asked seriously. âShall we take this cottage?'
The kitchen at number six was luscious with the scent of roses. There were two full jars of them standing at each end of the dresser, scarlet and rose pink and butter yellow, breathing out sweetness into the late afternoon. They'd been delivered by a breathless Ernest just after the postman had given Peggy a letter from Jim promising their arrival and telling her that he'd be home that afternoon
and that he had some smashing news for her. She'd been quite touched to be given such a treat.
âIt sounds terrific,' she said, putting flour in her mixing bowl. Jim should be home any minute now, but she'd just got time to make a few jam tarts for tea. âHome of your own, right near the airfield. I'd jump at it if I was you. What's the rent like?'
âWell that's the best bit,' Megan said, âshe says we can have it for free. Think a' that! Froggy's a pet of hers apparently.'
Her brown eyes were round with the wonder of all this sudden good fortune. âHe wants us to get married straight away. It's making my head spin, Peg.'
Peggy was rubbing the fat into the flour. âHow smashing!' she said. âFancy old Froggy proposing. When's the great day?'
âWellâ¦' Megan dithered.
âWell what?' Peggy said.
âNothing really,' Megan said. âExceptâ¦'
âDo you love him?' Peggy asked, looking her friend straight in the eyes and being Peggy coming straight to the point. âYou're not
in love
. I know that. But do you love him?'
âThat's the trouble,' Megan admitted. âI ain't sure. Leastways, not all the time. Sometimes I think I do. He's ever so kind, and he makes me laugh, and he's â sort of well protective really. But then sometimes I wonder if it ain't because he loves me so much that I get â sort of carried along â if you know what I mean. It'ud be smashing to have a place of me own, I don't deny, specially with Mum and Dad going off any day now. Well you see how it is, dontcher?'
Peggy added water to her pastry, stirring it with her fingers. âIs it because he's ugly?' she said.
Megan glared to the defence of her lover at once. âHe ain't ugly,' she said. âHe's no oil painting. I'll give you that. But he ain't ugly. He's got a lovely smile.'
âYou'll marry him,' Peggy said, grinning at her. âI don't know why you're worrying about it.'
âYou think so?'
âI know so, you soppy thing. I think it's smashing.'
Trust Peggy to know the truth of it, Megan thought.
She's always so sure of everything, dear old Peg. âYou'll be my bridesmaid,' she said, âor matron-of-honour, or whatever it is?' It was more a statement than a question, they were both so sure of the answer.
âCourse. When?'
âSix weeks, he says. He's in ever such a rush.'
This must've been what Jim was going to tell me about, Peggy thought. It's really rather romantic, a whirlwind wedding and a cottage in the country.
âWhat a bit of luck to find somewhere to live,' she said. âMe an' Jim have been hunting for ages.' Six whole months and no nearer to finding anywhere now than they'd been at the beginning. But there was no jealousy in her. Some people got homes, some didn't. That was the way things were. There was a war on.
The tarts were cooked, the table set, and the kids home from school fed and out again before Jim finally arrived.
âGuess what!' he said as he threw his kitbag down beside the hat stand. He was bristling with excitement, his eyes shining, dark hair bushy. So handsome.
âI've heard,' Peggy said, kissing him. âMegan just told me. A cottage in the country. Ain't they the lucky ones?'
They? he thought. And his excitement began to ebb away. They?
âAre you going to be best man?' Peggy went on, leading him into the back room. âI'll bet you are. I'm to be matron-of-honour. Did Froggy tell you?'
âAre they getting married?' he said, following her. He was leaden-footed with this sudden awful disappointment. Froggy and Megan. Of course. Why hadn't he realized it? How could he have been so stupid? But why hadn't Froggy told him? Oh Christ, Frog, you could've said. I've spent four days living in hopes and all for nothing.
âWell of course they're getting married. Ain't it grand?'
No, no, no, he thought, as they walked into the room. It ain't. It's bloody awful, and the worst of it was that he couldn't tell her.
Megan was looking up at him, her face bright with happiness.
âCongratulations,' he said, making a palpable effort to smile.
âYou must come an' stay with us,' Megan said. âFroggy says he's going to get it all painted up lovely. I'm going down next weekend to see. Froggy says â¦'
Her voice bubbled on, but although Jim heard the words they meant nothing to him. I've lost out again, he thought, and he knew he was angry and jealous, burning with the injustice of it all, in exactly the same way as he'd burned when he turned down the scholarship, lost his job, couldn't persuade his mother to leave the old man. It was bloody unfair. Why should Froggy have somewhere to live just because his aunt had money? It shouldn't be simply a matter of money. Everyone should have the right to a decent home. Everyone. There'll have to be some changes when this war's over, he thought. We can't go on living like this.
âWe can all get leave together,' Megan was planning, âan' then you can come and stay with us. We've got a put-u-up. Won't it be fun!'
The first leave that the Fergusons and the Boxalls spent together in Vine Cottage was fraught with unspoken emotion.
Froggy was in exceptionally high spirits. It hadn't taken him long to discover that marriage suited him down to the ground. Life at Vine Cottage was absolutely wizard, good food, lots of sex, cuddles every morning. Whizzo! And to cap everything he and Jim had been promoted to corporals.
âWe'll give a special dinner to celebrate,' he said to Megan.
So they did and although he didn't notice it, Megan found it rather difficult. She and Froggy didn't seem to speak the same language when it came to meals. For a start he had dinner at half past seven in the evening, which she found most peculiar, and he was ever so particular about the way it was served. She'd taken pains to arrange the table beautifully to please him, with a vase of September roses in the centre and table napkins beside each plate and knives and forks and spoons set out properly just like the toffs. The trouble was the food was really ordinary, being vegetable hot-pot followed by apple fritters, so she was brittle with anxiety about it.
Froggy had pushed the table up against the window for that first dinner so that they could look out at the garden while they ate.
âI'm going to grow carrots and onions and potatoes,' she
said, entertaining her guests just a little too brightly, âand tomatoes and celery if I can manage it.'
How she's changed, Peggy thought, admiring her plump cheeks and the sheen of her dark hair and wondering why she was so anxious, especially when she was running the house so well. I never thought I'd live to see a domesticated Megan, all this cooking and so houseproud and talking about gardening. Perhaps it's because she's in love. Because she was in love, fairly glowing with it every time she looked at old Froggy. Which was quite amazing after all the things she'd said. And Froggy had changed too. He was still the same cheerful Froggy she'd known for so long, but he'd put on quite a bit of weight. It was a great improvement. A rounder face made him look â well â less froggy.
Megan ate her apple fritters and continued to worry. Yesterday she'd sneaked a medical book out of the library in Chichester. She'd read it because she was afraid that she and Froggy might be overdoing things. The book wasn't exactly explicit, but as far as she could make out they seemed to be all right, seeing they were newly-weds, but it worried her just the same. Being married was jolly difficult. âFroggy wants me to plant runner beans,' she said, glancing at her husband who was signalling his real desires to her with one of his âall-oyer' looks. âI expect I shall give him what he wants, shan't I, Froggy? Sooner or later.'
âYou usually do,' her husband said happily. âWhat do you think of the cottage?' he asked his guests.
âVery nice,' Jim said shortly and then seeing his friend's face fall, âYou've transformed it.'
âYes,' Froggy agreed, âwe have.' It was scrubbed clean and newly painted and there wasn't a sign of cobweb or mildew or ironmould anywhere. It smelled of soft soap and starch and wax polish, there were clean curtains at the windows and clean covers on the cushions. âWhizzo, eh?'
Jim looked away. He'd been feeling shamefully jealous all through the meal, and it upset him to be jealous of his old friend and Megan. It was despicable, petty and shabby and despicable. He ought to be able to rise above it. And yet everywhere he looked he was reminded of the plans
he'd
made for this cottage, the hopes
he'd
entertained, the dreams
he'd
dreamed. If only he'd been the one with the rich aunt instead of Froggy.
Poor Jim, Peggy thought, watching him, I wonder why he's so unhappy. That little leaping movement in his jaw always gave him away. What was upsetting him? She'd have to see if she could tease him out of it, whatever it was. Not now, of course, later when they were alone.
She lifted her head to say something to Megan. And heard the first returning Spitfire.
Jim and Froggy were out of the room in an instant, heading for the newly-dug vegetable patch where they could get a clear view of the evening sky.
âWhere are they going?' Peggy asked, surprised by their speed.
âTo watch the squadron back in,' Megan explained, finishing her last fritter. âThey can't settle to anything âtil the squadron's in. We lost a Spitfire yesterday and it was one of theirs. It was awful. It upsets them ever so much when that happens.'
Of course, Peggy thought. That's what he's miserable about. I should have worked that out for myself. âThey're all in it together, that's what it is,' she said, âlike we are in London.' A community of suffering was something she understood very well.
The sleek planes followed one another onto the runway, their engines still running sweetly, smooth and strong and dependable. âNothing nicer than the sound of a Spitfire,' Peggy said.
And they'd all come home this time, as the two women could see from the relief on their husbands' faces.
âMore coffee?' Megan offered, hoping it hadn't gone cold while they were out of the house.
âI'd rather go for a walk,' Jim said. âI could do with a bit of fresh air.' And he signalled to Peggy with a quick imploring glance.
âGood idea,' Peggy said, understanding him. âI could do with a walk too.' They hadn't had a minute to themselves since she arrived.
So they left the newly weds in the cottage and strolled along Froggy's neatly-cleared pathway together in the
greening dusk, arm in arm.
âI'm glad they all got back,' she said. âThe Spitfires I mean.'
âYes. It's a bad show when they â¦'
âI know,' she said, squeezing his arm. âAt least they all got back tonight.'