âNow you come and sit up to the table,' Ernest said. âYou can keep that blanket round your legs. It won't hurt. Would you care for some more brandy?'
âOh no thank you,' she said, covering the top of the glass in case it was given despite her. âYou'll make me tipsy.'
âAnd a jolly good job too,' Leslie said. âDoes you good to be tipsy now and then. We always take a little nip when we're feeling low, don't we, Ernest? Best thing in the world, brandy. You drink it up.'
Ernest was removing a stewpot from the stove and dividing the contents between three soup plates. It smelled and looked delicious.
âNot for me,' Peggy said quickly. âThanks all the same, but that's your rations. I can't eat your rations.'
Ernest clicked his teeth. âThere's plenty,' he said. âWe've eked it out nicely. We've all got a nice big chunk of bread to go with it. You just eat it up, my dear, and stop fretting.'
She looked from one kind eager face to the other, beaming at her, willing her to accept. âWell if you're sure,' she said. And was whisked into her place at the table immediately.
It was an excellent meal and she felt better by the mouthful. And there was a second course too, a steamed pudding with raspberry jam, which Leslie said was his speciality. âYou must eat every last scrap or I shall take
offence,' he said, dividing it neatly into three.
So she ate every last scrap.
âWe ought to have some more brandy, don't you think?' Leslie suggested when their plates were clean. âFinish with a flourish.'
But the flourish at the end of this meal was even better than brandy. There was a knock at the door and when Ernest went to open it he came back into the room with Jim Boxall.
At the sight of him, Peggy wept again, but now there was a familiar chest to cry against and longed-for arms to hold her and comfort her. âOh Jim,' she said, âI
am
so glad to see you. How did you get here?'
âThirty-six hours compassionate.'
They sat on the settle together while he cuddled her with one arm and dried her tears with his handkerchief, and the two old men hovered about them, murmuring and approving, and telling Jim about the landmine and her bravery in little snatches and snippets of conversation. âTerrible tragedy â twelve killed, you know â no lights at the hospital â nor windows either â no lights no windows, imagine â they had to operate by candlelight â this dear girl's been so brave â too brave â looking after everybody the way she does.'
âThat's my Peggy,' he told them. âShe'd carry the world on her shoulders every minute of the day an' night if I didn't peel it off now an' then.'
âYou ought to get married,' Ernest said. âI can't think why you don't.'
âI got to look after Mum,' Peggy tried to explain. âI mean, I had to look after her,' feeling bleak because she was speaking in the past. âAnd there's the ARP.'
âNever mind the ARP,' Jim said practically, warning the two old men with a quick glance over the top of Peggy's head that this wasn't the time to be talking of weddings. âYou got everything arranged for the funeral? Do you know who's coming?'
âI got a list somewhere,' she said, trying to remember where she'd put it.
âLeave it to me,' he said. âYou just come home and show me where it is.'
âWhat a blessing you're back,' Ernest said. âI don't know how she'd have managed all on her own. I really don't.'
By now Peggy's sobs had subsided. Jim wiped her face with his handkerchief as the two old men looked on tenderly. âOK to go next door?' he asked, and when she nodded, âThat's my girl.'
She kissed her two rescuers goodbye. âThanks for everything,' she said. âIt was ever so good of you.'
âYes,' Jim said. âThanks for looking after her.' He'd never thought much of these two peculiar men if the truth were told but now he was reassessing his opinion.
âWhat are friends for?' Leslie said, flushing with pleasure.
âIf there's anything else you need,' Ernest added, âyou just give us a call.'
But there was nothing else Peggy needed now that Jim was home. His arrival made everything possible again. She remembered all the things she had to do the moment she stepped inside her own front door. She told him about the wreaths she'd ordered, she knew the time of the ceremony, she felt that she could sustain it all now, the nightmare had begun to recede.
And the next morning when people began to arrive she was steady and composed, standing beside Jim to welcome her subdued guests, Uncle Gideon and Ethel looking ill at ease in black, Aunt Maud and Josh looking old and bent and as grey as dust, Mrs Roderick weeping, the Allnutts pale and patient, John Cooper blowing his nose, Mr MacFarlane protective, Joan stern and her children baffled, Baby sniffing behind a spotted veil.
The service was mercifully brief. Too many bomb victims were being buried that day and there was no time for a long oration at the graveside, which was just as well because it was bleak and cold out there among the headstones. And when it was over and the mourning party had nibbled Peggy's sandwiches and drunk tea from her assorted cups, Jim began to suggest them towards the door. Maud and Josh had a train to catch, Mrs Roderick was escorted home by the Allnutts and Mr Cooper, Gideon and Ethel seemed only too glad to be gone. Soon only Mrs
Geary, Mr MacFarlane, Jim, the two children and the three sisters were left in the kitchen.
âI'll away now,' Mr MacFarlane said, taking his tin hat from the hook in the hall. âGod bless you, my dear.'
âTell Mr Goodall I'll be down to see him tonight,' Peggy said.
âNo, no,' Mr MacFarlane said. âThere's no rush.' And he kissed her before he left. âYou just bide here a wee while longer.'
âI'll give you a hand with those plates and cups,' Joan offered when he'd gone. âThen we'll make tracks.' She was busy and practical and seemed quite herself again, getting on with her life as she got on with the housework, putting death and funerals behind her.
Peggy didn't have the energy to get out of her chair. That awful numbing fatigue was engulfing her again. Seeing Joan recover so quickly had made it worse. She watched as the kitchen was set to rights and Yvonne and Norman were bundled into their coats and Balaclava helmets.
That's it then,' Joan said, âwe'll be off. Come on, kids.'
âWe'll walk you to the station,' Jim said, looking at Peggy. âBreath a' fresh air'ud do us good.'
Despite her lack of energy, or perhaps because of it, Peggy obeyed him like a child. They all walked down to the station, huddled against the cold and not talking. The hoardings were covered with posters giving advice and instructions, âBe wise â keep mum', âMake do and mend', âCareless talk costs lives', âDig for victory', âWe want your kitchen waste', âBeat fire bomb Fritz'.
âFunny that,' Peggy said.
âWhat?' Joan asked.
âThe hoardings. I must have seen them every day for years but I've never noticed them before.' She was in a most peculiar state, noticing things that weren't important and paying no attention to the things that mattered. It was almost as if she'd become somebody else.
âForever telling us what to do,' Joan said, dismissing the hoardings with a glance. âGets on my wick. As if we ain't got enough to contend with. Tatta, Jim. Tatta, Peg. See you Sunday. Give your Aunty Peggy a kiss, kids.'
Jim and Peggy stood on the platform and watched their train rattle away, its crisscrossed windows patterning its progress like some overgrown caterpillar, its roof dark grey with dust.
Peggy sighed. âEverything's so shabby,' she said. She was noticing that too.
âTime for a quick one,' Jim decided. âYou don't have to go back yet awhile.' And he walked her across to the Station Arms and ordered a couple of pints.
It was warm and crowded in the pub and the smell of spilled beer, sweat and tobacco smoke was reassuring even if it didn't comfort her.
âYour neighbours were right, you know,' Jim said, wiping the froth from his mouth on the back of his hand.
âWhich ones?' Peggy asked without much interest. âAbout what?'
âThe two old fellers where we used to live. About us getting married.'
âOh them.' She couldn't drum up any interest in them or the subject. He was talking about marriage and yet here she was sitting in a heap too tired to be interested. Oh dear.
âThem,' he said, watching her.
She drank her beer wearily, saying nothing. There was no vitality in her at all and the sight of her forlorn face roused him to a determined protectiveness. âI'll tell you what we're going to do,' he said. âFirst we'll finish our beer, and then we'll go down the registry office and we'll call the banns and get married.'
âWhat? Now?' What was he saying? How could they get married?
âNo,' he said, unperturbed. âNot today. In four weeks' time. I've got ten days' leave at the end a' the month, remember? One to get married on, eight days honeymoon, day to get back. Piece a' cake! I shall probably be a corporal come the summer. We could live on a corporal's pay as easy as pie. So that's what we'll do. You've been looking after people quite long enough. Now I'm going to look after you.'
Surprise and pleasure tempted her out of her lethargy at last. âWell it would be lovely,' she said, smiling at him,
such a slow gentle smile that it made him ache to put his arms round her and start protecting her there and then. To be looked after, she thought, to leave the blitz behind and drop all her responsibilities and just go off somewhere quiet and peaceful all on her own with him. Oh, it
would
be lovely. âI don't know though.'
âWhat don't you know?'
âIt's just â¦' she said, her brow puckered with the effort to find the right way to tell him all this. âOh I don't know ⦠If it wasn't for the war and us not having any money, I'd've married you long ago. But you know that anyway. It's just ⦠Well I can't walk away from it all now. Not with the raids still going on and everything. It wouldn't be right, would it?'
The publican was roaring with laughter behind the bar, and the sound annoyed Jim, making him brusque.
âYes,' he said firmly. âIt would be right. Absolutely right. You need looking after. I need to look after you. So that's what we'll do.' It was a statement, a decision, there was no doubt left in him at all.
She began to worry. âBut where would we live?' she said. âHow would we manage? There's invitations to send. Weddings take ever such a lot a' work. Oh dear! It's too soon afterâ¦'
âWe'll marry first,' he said, wearing his most stubborn expression, âand sort all that out afterwards.'
âBut what about Baby? How will she manage the rent if she's all on her own? I promised Mum â¦'
âBaby earns a darn sight more than you do,' he said. âYou don't have to worry about Baby. Do her good to look after herself. She's a lot tougher than you think.'
âOh dear,' she worried again. âI don't see how we can.'
âI do,' he said. âJust leave it to me.'
She was too tired, too stunned and, beneath her fatigue, too pleased to argue any further. If that was what was going to happen, she thought, it would happen. Perhaps it was meant to.
So they went to the registry office, and she watched while he applied for a licence, filled in forms and booked their wedding. In half an hour the whole thing was signed and settled.
âNow,' he said, âwe'll go shopping and get the ring, and then I shall have to be getting back. You got three weeks to buy yourself a dress and that's all you've got to worry about. An' a hat from old Madame Aimee's perhaps. Joan'll see to everything else.'
The next three weeks spun past in a confusion of activity. As he'd predicted, Joan and Mrs Geary threw themselves into wedding preparations, delighted to have a reason for celebration, organizing a sing-song, ordering booze, even baking a sponge cake with two precious eggs and tremendous enthusiasm. Mr Allnutt set up trestle tables which actually remained upright if a trifle precarious, Mrs Roderick recovered from her grief and re-trimmed her best hat, Uncle Gideon arrived with a canteen of cutlery as a wedding present, and Tom slunk away to the empty bedroom upstairs where he curled himself up on top of the chest of drawers, scowling with displeasure.
And then it was their wedding day and they were standing side by side in a registry office so full of people that there wasn't room to turn around, repeating their promises after the registrar while their guests sneezed and coughed and blew their noses and burst into a bedlam of congratulation the minute the little ceremony was over.
âJust what we all needed,' Mrs Geary said, handing round refreshments at the ding-dong afterwards. âWe've all had a darn sight too much grief just lately, what with one thing an' another. Ain't that right, Gideon?'
âFlossie would've approved a' this,' he agreed, taking the proffered sandwich. âI can tell you that. They're a lovely couple. Me an' Ethel was just saying so.'
âBest thing all round,' Ethel agreed. âShe'd only ha' moped, poor girl, if she'd stayed at home by herself. This'll take her mind off it.'
It had actually taken her mind off everything, and so effectively that it wasn't until she was at Victoria station later that afternoon and struggling through the usual crowds of kit-bagged servicemen, that Peggy realized that she was married.
âMrs Peggy Boxall,' she said, turning the ring on her finger.
âSuits you.'
âWhere are we going, Jim?'
âIt's a secret,' he said beaming at her.
She didn't try to guess where it was. Let it be a surprise. Honeymoons were supposed to be secret, weren't they?