Looking for You (Oh Captain, My Captain #1) (9 page)

I’ve never been this naked in front of anyone, especially a man. I’m shaking with anticipation of what he is going to next. He smiles as if he is about attack me, but I know that he wouldn’t. His lips cover mine. I moan with the pleasure from his soft lips on mine. He picks me up, fireman style, and lays me in the center of the bed. He props himself above me, and I feel his hardness between my legs. The tightening in my chest increases as I think of how close I am to him. I keep telling myself to trust him, and that he won’t go that far.

He leaves my mouth and lies on his side next to me. He begins to kiss my neck down to my breasts. He pulls my bra down, and I quickly inhale as the shot of electricity goes through my veins when he gently sucks on my nipple. My stomach flutters as I feel his fingertips trail down to the top of my thong. I want him to touch me, and I silently pray that he does. I moan his name as he switches to my other breast and teases me over my thong.

I let go of all logic. I let my body and hormones take over. I grip his neck with one hand and hold on to the comforter with the other. I rock my hips, saying his name over and over. He releases my breast and comes back to my mouth. My legs open on their own accord as he moves my underwear to the side. He gently touches me. My body jerks as he rubs me. He slowly enters a finger inside of me. I break the kiss and arch my back. I moan loudly.

“Just relax,” he says in my ear. “Enjoy it.”

His fingers work me, and I feel my body tightening around him.

“Ellie, you feel so good.” His words send a small thrill through me.

I move my hand down his back to the top of his waistband. My hormones have officially taken over. I gently drag my nails to the front of him. I’m not sure if he wants me to do this, or if I’m even going to do it right, but I do. My confidence levels rise as I take him in hand.

“Oh my God, Ellie,” he moans working on me faster.

I begin to go at the same pace as him. He says my name again and that he won’t last long. Within a couple of moments, I yell his name, and my body is shaking. Hudson releases the same time, saying my name over and over. I can’t believe what just happened. I look at Hudson as he stares at me. I’m not sure what to say. I’ve never had so many emotions races through me. I feel beautiful, confident, content, and unsure of what is going to happen next.

“I told you to trust me.” He kisses me, taking away all the uncertainty.

Chapter Fifteen

Hudson

What a night. Starting with Ellie accusing me of being married, me attempting to tell her about my job, but failing, and then what we just did. Ellie is extraordinary, in all aspects. I still can’t believe everything that’s happened today. A little while later, we’re dressed and laying in bed facing one another.

“Tell me about your childhood and your aunt,” I say softly. She’s never really talked about it, and I want to know everything about her.

Ellie seems surprised, but she cuddles up to me and begins to tell me about it. “My aunt was the best person I’ve ever known. She raised me with no complaints. She homeschooled me and she was my best friend. We did a lot of stuff outside. I think that’s why I like nature so much. She had a large flower bed in our backyard, and we were always working in it together. She would buy me books, and we would read until late into the night. She wasn’t a big TV watcher either. She didn’t have a mean bone in her body.”

“She seems like she was an amazing person,” I tell her once she’s done. It seems like once her parents died, Ellie stuck close to her aunt, which makes sense after losing them at such a young age.

“She was. I still miss her,” she whispers.

I hug her to me, and as she drifts to sleep, I decide once and for all that I’ll tell her the day after her company dinner. If I tell her before then, and she reacts as badly as my mother and sister think she will, she’s going to hate that dress. It’ll ruin her wearing it that night, and I don’t want to take that away from her. I promise myself that no matter how crazy it gets with the playoffs starting, I will tell her. I’ll do like my mother said. I’ll take her to the rink, put skates on her feet, a stick in her hands, and show her one of the most important parts of me. The plan is already in place. I just have to wait to make it happen.

~ ~ ~

“Sorry, Hudson. She’s always late. I should have told her to be here an hour beforehand and she would have made it here on time,” Ellie says apologetically.

Tonight is the dinner with her best friend, Lacey, and we’ve been waiting thirty minutes already at Ellie’s kitchen table. She seems a little nervous, but so am I. My leg is bouncing furiously at the chance that Lacey will recognize me.

“It’s fine,” I tell her. Maybe she will cancel and I can spend the evening alone with Ellie.

Just then, Ellie’s front door opens and a girl walks in. “Alright, I know I’m late, don’t start. I’m ready to meet Prince Charm-holy shit!”

Recognition is all over her face. Holy shit is right.

“Lacey, don’t be rude,” Ellie chides.

I stand, swallow hard, and hope like hell she doesn’t say anything. With my hand outstretched, I say, “Hi, I’m Hudson. It’s nice to meet you, Lacey.”

Her mouth is hanging open. Slowly, her hand lifts and grips mine, squeezing tightly. “Um, yeah, Mr. Architect, nice to meet you.” She lets go of my hand and turns. “Ellie, it’s such a nice day, why don’t we eat on the back porch? Hudson, do you mind helping me get the dessert? I left it in my car.”

“Of course.” I follow her outside, but as soon as we’re out of earshot, she swivels to face me.

“Are kidding me? You’re no damn architect. You’re Hudson King from the Portland Vikings! What the hell are you doing?” Lacey is furious, her hand gesturing as she talks.

“I know it looks bad, please don’t say anything to her. I’m going to tell her,” I plead as she stalks to her car, opens the door, and then turns back to face me.

“That’s my best friend, and in case you haven’t noticed, she’s an
amazing
person. I’m not gonna stand here and watch you break her heart. I don’t care who you are.” She gives me a death glare. “Why are lying to her anyway?”

I sigh. “Long story short, I was thrilled that she didn’t know who I was at first. I was a normal guy to her. Every time I’ve tried telling her, she either interrupts me or says something about how she doesn’t like sports. I tried telling her the other day, but someone,” I point my own glare at her, “convinced her that my secret was that I am married.”

“Okay, my mistake thinking you were married,” she puts her hands up, like she’s surrendering, “but look at it from my point of view. You were gone all the time, and no architect travels that much. How the hell was I supposed to know you were traveling because you’re in the middle of playoff season?”

“Just please don’t tell her. I’m going to tell her soon. Please,” I beg.

“You tell her soon or so help me God. I will break your knees with your damn hockey stick. Ellie is nothing but pure gold. No one has
ever
betrayed her. If you haven’t noticed, she has lived a sheltered life and is just now truly coming out of her shell.” She shakes her head and mumbles, “I can’t
believe
the first guy that is supposed to care for her is a damn liar.”

“Is everything okay?” Ellie asks from the front porch.

“Yeah,” Lacey calls back. “Turns out I forgot the dessert. Sorry, Ellie.” She slams her door with another angry look at me.

We head back inside, and I can’t get Lacey’s words out of my head. Nothing she said is news to me, but the dread rises within me. She’s right. I’ve betrayed Ellie, and it’s going to kill her when she finds out. Sitting on the back porch, Ellie gives me a worried look, so I gently squeeze her hand and smile to let her know that things are fine.

“You know, Hudson, when I told Lacey about you, she recognized your name. She must have seen your work before.”

“Oh yeah?” I glance at Lacey. Here comes the test.

“I must have been thinking of a different Hudson King,” Lacey shrugs, like it doesn’t matter anymore. “I think there’s a figure skater from Nova Scotia that has the same name.” She wears a small smile.

I have to resist glaring at her as Ellie laughs. I want to say that I’m not a figure skater, I’m a hockey player, but that’s not happening.

Ellie looks at me with her head tilted. “I can’t picture you in clothes like that.”

“Oh, I can picture him in a uniform,” Lacey adds.

Just kill me now. To get conversation away from this deadly line she insists to walk on, I ask Lacey about how she met Ellie.

“We met at a seminar. Sweet Ellie here kept me awake the whole time. Yep, that’s our Ellie. Caring, sweet, kindhearted, you know just an honest person. It’s so sad that world has so many dishonest people in it. Oh well, what are you going to do? I mean, tell the truth, it would just be easier.” Lacey casually looks my way.

I drop my head, running my hand over my face. I don’t think I can do this. I can’t sit here for the rest of dinner with Lacey taunting me. I told her that I would tell Ellie and I’m going to. Why can’t that be enough for now? She doesn’t have to put me through this.

“Um, am I missing something?” Ellie asks, obviously confused.

“Oh, Ellie. I’m sorry. I’m being rude, and I don’t mean to be. I have had a really long and complicated day. I apologize, Hudson. I don’t mean it. Let’s just enjoy this great food and talk about something interesting.”

Ellie seems to accept this, but now I’m stressed out and ready to go home. The weight of my omission is too heavy to bear. I listen as they talk, not really absorbing anything they’re saying. Ellie’s fingers brush my arm to snap me out of my thoughts. She’s looking at me expectantly.

“What?” I ask.

“Is everything okay?” She repeats softly with concern.

“I’m sorry. I’m not feeling all that great. I think I’m going to go home.” I scoot my chair back and stand, placing a hand on her shoulder. “I’ll see you in a few days, okay?”

Ellie nods. “Just leave your plate. I’ll get it. I hope you feel better, Hudson.”

“Thank you.” I kiss her cheek, turn to Lacey and tell her it was nice meeting her, and then I get the hell away from them as fast as possible.

The more I think about it, the sicker I feel. All I can think about is the look on Ellie’s face when I tell her that I’m not an architect like she thinks I am. The longer I think about it, the worse it gets. Finally, I can’t take it anymore, pull off on the side of the road and call my mother.

“Hudsy,” she answers. “How are you?”

“Terrible, Mom.” For like the fifth time, I run my hand over my face as if I’ll wipe away all of my stress.

“Oh, no. You told her?”

“Ha, not yet. I’m going to tell her in a couple of days. I know I have to, but it’s going to destroy her and kill me in the process. The plan is to do like you said and show her what I love about it. But won’t that seem like I’m...hell, I don’t know,” I finish frustrated that I can’t seem to explain myself clearly.

“Take a deep breath, Hudson.” She waits until I do so. “Remember what I told you, if it’s meant to be, it will be. It might take a while, but it’ll happen. Just be honest and sincere with her. Everything else will fall into its rightful place.”

“I sure hope so.”

Chapter Sixteen

Ellie

I watch Hudson walk away from me, and I’ve never seen him look so upset before. I turn to Lacey and stare at her.

“What?” She scrunches her eyebrows at me.

“What the heck happened? I thought this was going to be a good night. What did you say to him?”

“You assume that it’s my fault that Prince Charming didn’t feel well and left?” She picks up her plate and heads into the house. I pick up our plates and follow her.

“Lacey, what is going on? Seriously. You two were talking, alone, for a while out front. What is it?” When I walked out to them, they looked like they were arguing. Lacey puts her plate on the counter with her back to me. “Lacey, please?” I plead quietly.

She finally turns to me. “Okay, I may have told him that if he hurts you, I’ll physically hurt him.”

“Lacey!” I yell at her. “Why would you do that?”

She crosses her arms and steps closer to me. “You’re my best friend. I love you, and I’m looking out for you. I always will.”

“I appreciate that, I do. However, I trust Hudson. He’s not going to hurt me. Plus, I think it’s getting serious.” I walk around her and put my plates on the counter.

“Wait, what do you mean? Has
something
happened?”

I turn to her and smile. “Well, I didn’t have sex, but
something
did happen.”

Lacey gasps. “Oh my God, do you give him a blow job?”

“Lacey!” I yell at her. “I can’t believe you said that.” My face feels like it’s on fire.

“What? It’s a legitimate question. Did you?”

“No, I didn’t. Other stuff happened, but not that.” I shake my head at her and head back to the porch to finish cleaning up.

“Okay, okay. I shouldn’t be so blunt with you, but I want you to be careful. I don’t want anything or anyone to hurt you.” Lacey helps me pick up items on the table.

“I know, but like I said, Hudson is different. I know it.” I smile at her, and she gives me a small smile back.

“Just remember one thing. At some point in their lives, all men are stupid. Even Prince Charming.” She gives me a serious look.

“I love that you care so much.” I reach over and hug her tightly.

We spend the rest of the evening, cleaning up, and talking about our jobs. Lacey asks me about the dinner tomorrow evening.

“Oh yeah, Jeffrey is on my case about it. He wants everything perfect.”

“I can’t believe he’s making such a fuss about a company dinner.”

“It’s not just a dinner, though. It’s a huge fundraiser for the children’s hospital. Everybody who's anybody will be there, even celebrities. That’s why I’m so nervous.” I don’t want to think about tomorrow. It makes my stomach queasy.

“I’m sure it will be fine. You’re a smart cookie. You’ve got it. Isn’t Prince Charming going with you?”

I shake my head. “He has to work.”

I watch her face as she rolls her eyes. “Of course.” When she realizes I’m watching, she smiles. “Alright, I’m out of here. I love you.” She hugs me and heads out.

I send Hudson a text, saying that I hope  he feels better. Then I jump in the shower to get ready for bed. I go through the house, making sure everything is locked up and crawl into the bed. I see that my phone is blinking, alerting me of a text.

Hudson: I feel a little better, but I miss you

Me: Aw, miss you too. See you in couple days.

Hudson: Yep, have fun tomorrow at your dinner

Me: Have a great night at work =)

I lay my phone down and fall asleep with a smile on my face.

~ ~ ~

My hands are shaking as I put the final touches of makeup on. This dinner is a big deal and Jeffrey has reminded me so many times that he wants everything to be perfect. I look in my full length mirror and smile. My beautiful dress makes me feel like a princess, and it’s all because of Hudson. The past two months are better than I could ever imagine. Thinking about him, I send him a quick text. I know that he is busy with work, but I want him to know that I’m thinking about him and hoping that he is feeling better.

Me: Just thinking about you! Hope you’re feeling better! Can’t wait to see you tomorrow

I gather the last few things and head out the door.

Traffic is a nightmare, but I finally make it to the event. I don’t valet my car because I don’t want to have to spend the extra money. I park a couple blocks down and walk up to the event. It’s being held in the oldest hotel in the city, in its massive ballroom.

I’m in awe as I walk into the hotel lobby. It looks stunning with the architecture work everywhere. I bet Hudson would love to come here and see this detail on the ceiling.

“Ellie,” Jeffrey’s stern voice startles me as I turn around. “Now remember we’re here to make more business contacts. The shy, small town act you’ve got going on might work here.” I nod, even though it’s not an act. I stare at Jeffrey and notice that he looks like he stuffed himself into his tux.

“Jeff, stop being an ass,” Jeffrey’s wife, Melody, comes up behind him. “How are you, dear?” She asks me.

I smile and nod. Melody is very nice and comes around the office often. I think she is the only one that can handle Jeffrey.

“This is a big night for us. We need to be on our game,” Jeffrey hisses.

“I won’t let you down, Jeffrey,” I say quietly.

“We need something to drink.” Jeffrey heads off to the bar, ignoring my comment.

Melody comes over to me and pats my shoulder. She tells me how stunning I look, and I blush.

“My boyfriend bought it for me,” I say sheepishly.

“Well, he has impeccable taste that is for sure.” She winks at me.

Jeffrey comes back with three glasses of champagne. When he hands me mine, I realize that I’m holding real crystal. I’ve never drank out of anything so shiny and beautiful before.

“Alright, let’s get this ass kissing started.” Jeffrey turns and we head into the main ballroom.

I’m sure my eyes are about to fall out of my head as I enter the room. There is wall to wall people. I can feel my chest tighten when seeing all of them. I look around and try to take in the room itself. It’s gold and shimmers in the lighting. The murals on the wall look old, like the early 1900’s. It’s breathtaking seeing the details of the work.

Jeffrey starts to work around the room. He’s completely different as he introduces me. He tells everyone what a great sales rep I am, and how attentive I am to the clients’ needs. I can barely get a word in, as he goes on and on about me. Bouncing from person to person is making me a little dizzy. I excuse myself from them to go grab some fresh air. Of course, the lobby is just as crowded. I look around trying to find a place that isn’t full of people. I see a hallway off to my right that doesn’t have anyone standing around, so I head that way.

As I walk down the hall a little bit, I take a few deep breaths to calm my nerves down. This is an important night and Jeffrey’s right, I need to be on my game. I stand here for a moment when I hear a bunch of laughing to my left. I look to see a door that is about halfway open. I can see that there are about five men standing in there just busting out laughing.

I peek in and stop. The one man with his back towards me is built almost like Hudson. He even has his shaggy hair. The other men around him are taller. Why is Hudson here? I mean, if it is him. 

“Alright boys, let’s get going.” Hudson’s voice orders the men around him. I would know his voice anywhere. It
is
Hudson. The guys begin to shrug off their jackets. An older man on the left takes their jackets, and the men around Hudson begin to put on jerseys.

Including Hudson.

I can see the back it has the number fourteen on it with his last name across his shoulders. Why is he putting on a jersey? He turns, and I have confirmation that it’s him. His head is down as he looks at his phone. I can see him smile as he seems to be texting someone.

Instantly, my phone buzzes and I look down.

Hudson: I bet you’re stunning. I’m always thinking about you. See you tomorrow.

My heart jumps in my throat as I turn and run back the way I just came from. Something isn’t right. I try to put the pieces together as I walk back into the main ballroom. I’m about to Google Hudson’s name when Jeffrey comes up.

“Hey, where have you been? We have more people to talk to,” he hisses at me.

“Jeffrey,” I swallow down the lump of anxiety that is creeping up. He knows a lot about sports, maybe he could answer my question. “Who’s Hudson King?”

“He’s the captain of the Portland Vikings hockey team. Why? You want to meet him? He is supposed to be here tonight with some other members of the team.”

I’m about to tell him no when someone says Jeffrey’s name.

“William, how the hell are you?” Jeffrey shakes the man’s hand. “William, this is my top sales rep, Ellie Sullivan. Ellie, this is William Night. He is an assistant coach of the Portland Vikings. Ellie here was just asking me about Hudson.”

I notice that he is the older man from the room.

“Oh, these past few months he has been playing at the top of his game. If he keeps this up, we’re going to win it all, that’s for sure. You want to meet him?” He smiles at me.

Before I can even open my mouth, I hear him yell for Hudson. I think I’m going to faint. I don’t know how to handle this. William turns slightly and blocks me from seeing Hudson walking up to us.

“Hudson, you have a couple of fans who want to meet you. This is the CEO of the Omega Medical Supply Company, Jeffrey Martin.”

“Nice to meet you, Mr. Martin,” I hear Hudson say.

“And this lovely lady,” he turns slightly as I see the panic in Hudson’s chocolate brown eyes, “is his top sales rep, Ellie Sullivan.”

I don’t know what to do, and I don’t think Hudson does either. I know if I embarrass Jeffrey, he will fire me on the spot. On top of that, if I cause I scene, it will only draw attention to the situation. Then, I remember my aunt saying to conduct yourself properly in public no matter the situation.

“Ellie?” Jeffrey brings me out of my thoughts.

I will my tears away and say confidently, “Sorry, it’s nice to meet you, Mr. King.” I stick my hand out for him to shake it.

I see Hudson close his eyes, and I know that he’s trying to hide the hurt on his face. When he opens them, he gives me a sad smile. He gently shakes my hand. “Nice to meet you, Ms. Sullivan.”

“Aw, Ellie seems to be starstruck by our captain,” Mr. Night says. “He does have a way with the ladies.” They laugh, but I stare at Hudson, and he stares back.

I clear my throat and put on a fake smile. “If you gentlemen will excuse me, I think I need a little fresh air before the dinner starts. It’s a pleasure meeting you, Mr. Night,” I shake his hand. “Mr. King.” I only nod to Hudson, before I turn and walk away.

As badly as I want to run, I don’t. I walk with my head held high. I begin to think about our time together. It’s all a lie. He lied to me this entire time. I thought he cared for me. I thought I could trust him.

I gave Hudson the one thing I gave no one else, my heart, and this is how he repays me. I walk through the lobby and out the front door. Leaving the party will only cause Jeffrey to fire me, but I don’t care. I can’t stay here. I can’t be in the same room as Hudson right now. Anger is radiating through me. An anger I’ve never felt before.

“Ellie!” I hear Hudson yell for me, but I won’t turn around. “Ellie, wait!”

I keep walking until he jumps in front of me. He grabs my arms to stop me from walking on. The bright “C” is gleaming on his left side. The Vikings helmet on the front looks like it is mocking me too.

“Please let me explain,” he begs.

The first tear falls from my eyes. “You lied to me.” I feel my lip quiver.

“Ellie, I swear it’s not like that. Let me explain.”

“You’re a professional hockey player?”

He drops his hands from me, and runs them through his hair. “Yes.”

“Not an architect?”

He shakes his head.

“Jeffrey said that you were a captain or something?”

He pointed to that bright “C” on his chest. “I am. I’m the captain of the team.”

“You lied to me,” I repeat. I can’t comprehend everything that is happening to me at this moment. I thought I could trust him, but he had been lying to me the whole time we’ve been together.

“I didn’t lie. I never said the words that I was an architect. You just assumed I was because of my major. I just omitted my hockey life from you. Everything else was real. I swear.”

I stare into his eyes. He looks like he is on the verge of crying. I can see the pain coming from him. He steps towards me, but I step back.

“Omitting the truth is lying. I trusted you. I trusted you with everything. I gave you my heart, and now,” I stop as more tears fall. “And now, I find out that it was all a lie.”