Lord of the Shadows (60 page)

ia had never seen the Lord of the Suns' palace and she was quite taken aback by its beauty when her carriage trundled through the gateway. The ancient building was a relic of a time that seemed more elegant, less brutal, than the world they lived in now. Seeing the palace helped her appreciate Dirk's fascination with learning as much as he could about the long forgotten people who had constructed it.

She was welcomed into the palace like an honored guest, although Tia still hadn't gotten used to people bowing and curtsying wherever she went. She wanted to put a stop to it, but Misha wouldn't let her. It was all part of the game, he claimed. Anyway, she had as much right to the claim of highborn as anyone did, he reminded her. Tia didn't actually think having Lady Ella Geon as a mother was anything to be terribly proud of, but she understood what he was trying to say.

Dirk was down by the lake. He was standing on the shore staring out over the water, his hands thrust deeply into the pockets of his trousers. He turned at the sound of her footsteps. He didn't look surprised to see her.

“They told me I'd find you out here.”

“And here I am …” He studied her for a moment and then looked away, as if he couldn't bear her scrutiny.

“You look well,” she said, thinking if she'd tried harder, she could have thought of something even more banal to say.

“So do you.”

“I have to say I'm a little disappointed, though. You know… Lord of the Shadows, Lord of the Suns and all that… here in the very seat of your power, I thought you'd be dressed like a monk or something.”

The briefest of smiles flickered across his face. “One of the advantages of being the boss. I get to set the dress code.”

“I saw Eryk up at the house. He seems a little … unhappy.”

“He's still trying to figure out what happened in Omaxin. And if he had something to do with Kirsh dying. We've gone to some pains to keep it from him that he was the one who delivered the poison to Antonov.”

“Poor Eryk.”

“He'll be all right eventually, and Caterina will help him through it. He just needs time.”

She studied him curiously for a moment. “You don't need a hostage anymore, Dirk. The Brotherhood contract on you has long been called off.”

“Caterina doesn't want to leave.”

“Really?”

He frowned at what she was implying. “It's not what you think, Tia. She actually suggested she marry Eryk.”

“You're kidding! Why?”

“From her point of view, it's an excellent match, I suppose. Eryk adores her and she gets to live in a palace. If she returns to Tolace, she'll end up married to a sailor or a Brotherhood man and spend the rest of her life cooking and cleaning and making babies. She's quite a pragmatist, our Caterina.”

“Or an opportunist.”

“If they're both happy with the arrangement, does it really matter?”

“I suppose not,” she agreed uncertainly. “But are you really going to allow it?”

“Not right away,” Dirk assured her. “For one thing, they're both far too young and naive to know what they want. Eryk certainly is, at any rate. Besides, it's a little too glib a solution for my liking. I'm sure Caterina means what she says now, but I don't want Eryk getting hurt the first time she spies some handsome fellow who takes a shine to her and she realizes how much better she could do. I told her I'd think about it. And that she could stay until I made up my mind.”

“Isn't that just making it harder on her if you eventually refuse her?”

“It won't hurt Caterina to have her mettle tested a little.”

Tia nodded in agreement, thinking they'd all had their mettle tested recently.

“How's Misha?”

“He's got a lot of work ahead of him,” she said. “But he's stronger than people give him credit. He'll manage. Landfall was rather trying. But we got through it.” She began to walk along the shoreline. Dirk fell into step beside her as they headed away from the palace. “Have you seen Alenor?”

Dirk shook his head. “Not since she went back to Kalarada.”

“She's married to Alexin now. I was in Kalarada for the wedding. It was quite a party. I expected you to be there.”

“I was in Elcast. Anyway, Alenor doesn't need me around to rule Dhevyn. She's more than capable of doing it on her own.”

“Did you know she gave Lady Lexie the Duchy of Elcast?”

Dirk nodded. “We corresponded a good deal about it. Alenor thought I might want it.”

“You didn't?” she asked curiously.

“Not even when I thought I was Wallin's son.”

“Then it was you who suggested Oscon of Damita adopt Rees's son as his heir?”

“No. That was Alenor's idea. Faralan wasn't capable of ruling Elcast on her own. She'll be much happier in Damita. Her baby is Oscon's great-grandson and with Baston dead, he needed an heir. It seemed the best solution all round.”

“And it saves Alenor from having to deal with a disinherited heir someday, bent on reclaiming his father's estates,” Tia observed.

“As I said, she's more than capable of ruling Dhevyn on her own.”

“Did you hear Alenor made Mellie her heir until she has a child of her own?” Tia asked, feeling a bit like a slave delivering a summary of the local gossip she'd heard around the village well.

“Then the next Queen of Dhevyn will be Melliandra Thorn,” Dirk predicted. “After what Marqel did to her, Alenor will probably never bear another child.”

They walked along the shore for a way in silence.

“Did you know Ella is dead?” she ventured carefully.

“Yes.” There was no emotion in his voice.

“She was poisoned. With ergot, Misha says. It wasn't very pleasant, by all accounts.”

“Not an undeserved fate, when all is said and done,” he remarked.

“Was it you?”

Dirk stopped at looked her. “Do you really want me to answer that?”

She thought about it for a moment, and then shook her head. “I'm sorry. I had no right to ask …”

“You still think I'm a cold-blooded killer, don't you?”

“Well, you see, that's the problem, Dirk,” she sighed. “I don't know what you are.”

He looked away, but when he looked back at her, his steel-gray eyes were just as unreadable, just as hard to fathom, as they had ever been. “I'm sorry for the pain I caused you, Tia. I'm sorry I hurt anyone. But I couldn't stand by and do nothing. And the battle isn't over yet. It's going to take years to undo the damage Belagren and Antonov did.”

She nodded, knowing he spoke the truth. “I thought about it, you know. I thought about how much I love Misha. I thought about how much good I could do as the wife of the Lion of Senet. It all seems a little too perfect.”

“What's wrong with that?”

“I'm not sure. I suppose I don't want to finish up like your father.”

“You mean with my knife buried up to the hilt in your throat?” he asked, with more than a little bitterness.

“That's not what I meant.”

“Then what did you mean?”

She shrugged, not sure how to put her thoughts into words. “Lexie told me once I'd never understand what Morna and Johan shared unless I experienced it for myself.”

“Is that why you're here?” he asked, looking a little alarmed at the notion. “To rekindle what you think we had?”

“No. Lust brought on by isolation isn't love, Dirk. I had to meet Misha before I truly understood that, though.”

“Does he know you're here?”

“He suggested it. He's concerned about what will happen in the future if you and I can't get along.”

“You told him about us, didn't you?”

She nodded and then smiled, feeling a little foolish. “I think the day I found myself pouring my heart out to Misha about what a cad you were was the day it occurred to me who I really loved.”

Dirk didn't reply. They kept walking along the shore with nothing but the distant honking of an aggravated swan disturbing the silence.

“Misha's right, I suppose. I guess that's why I said I'd come. To clear the air. I don't know how you did it, Dirk, not really. I mean I understand
what
you did, I even think I know why, but how you could do all those terrible things and never let on to anyone, never share it …” She shrugged. “I'm not sure I'm saying this right.”

“I think I understand.”

Tia hesitated, not sure what else to say. “Perhaps we'll see you in Avacas for the coronation? Misha would like it if you came.”

“I think my presence is required. The Lord of the Suns is supposed to crown the Lion of Senet, I believe. I have to return to Avacas for the trial, in any case. Ella's dead, but Madalan and Yuri still need to be dealt with.”

She suddenly couldn't meet his eyes. “You'll understand if you're not invited to the wedding, won't you? I mean, it's only going to be a small affair. Misha hates making a fuss.”

“It's all right. I won't be offended.”

He didn't sound offended, but there was no way of telling if he meant it or not. She looked at him uncertainly. “Look …I just wanted to say one more thing … when I first learned you were Johan's son … when I found out who you were … it wasn't easy for me… for any of us. You're so like him in some ways, and other ways you're so different. I wanted… Oh, damn… I'm not making any sense. I wanted
you to be like him, I suppose. I so badly wanted you to be proud, and honorable, and noble … all the things I thought Johan was.”

“And I wasn't?”

“Johan's pride cost him Dhevyn, Dirk. You got it back for him. You got it back in a way Johan was incapable of even imagining.”

“Is that a compliment or a condemnation?” he asked with a wry smile. “And I truly don't deserve any credit for freeing Dhevyn. That was your doing, Tia, not mine.”

“What I'm trying to say, Dirk,” she said, “is that I think Johan would have been proud of you.” She smiled then, and realized it was probably going to be all right between them. “Your methods probably would have given him apoplexy …”

“My lord?”

Dirk turned to the servant who had hailed him. “Yes?”

“There is
another
new acolyte waiting to see you, my lord. This one is very insistent.”

“Tell him I'll be right there,” Dirk ordered, before turning back to Tia. “I'm sorry. I really have to go.”

“A new acolyte?”

“We've been flooded with them recently. It's suddenly fashionable to be a Sundancer again.”

She nodded. “Then I shouldn't keep you any longer. Goodbye, Dirk.”

“Good-bye, Tia.”

“Dirk!” she called after him.

He stopped to look at her over his shoulder.

“Do you remember the day we arrived in Omaxin? You told me one day I'd have to admit you were on my side.”

Dirk nodded slowly. “I also remember you telling me I'd have to do something fairly spectacular to convince you.”

“You certainly did that.”

He smiled at her. “Misha's a lucky man, Tia. You can tell him I said so, if you want.”

“I will,” she promised.

Dirk walked back toward the palace without looking back. Tia watched him leave with an odd feeling it took her a little
while to define. She smiled to herself when she realized it wasn't so much what she was feeling, but what she
wasn't
feeling.

For the first time she could remember, she wasn't angry at Dirk Provin.

he new acolyte was waiting for Dirk in the morning room, looking out over the gardens toward the lake. She was wearing a dark blue riding habit and had obviously not even waited to change before demanding to see him. She turned when she heard him enter.

“Ja
cin
ta?”

“Please don't say my name like that. You sound like my mother.”

“What are you doing here? Is something wrong?”

“Nothing more than usual,” she shrugged. “Was that who I think it was just now with you on the lawn?”

“Tia Veran,” he confirmed. “Although she'll be Princess Tia Latanya soon.”

“I'm a little surprised to find her seeking an audience with the Lord of the Suns,” Jacinta remarked with a raised brow. “I got the distinct impression you two didn't get along.”

“We had a few loose ends that needed to be settled.” Dirk walked across the room and stopped a few paces from her. “Did Alenor send you?”

“No.”

The thought she had come here of her own volition filled him with a strange sense of anticipation. “Then what are you doing here? I thought you'd be married to Raban Seranov by now.”

She laughed. “Like
that
was ever going to happen while I still had breath in my body.”

“Your mother called off the wedding?”

“I called it off,” she told him defiantly.

“So you've run away again,” he concluded with a smile.

“Running away is something children do, Dirk. I happen to feel I have a higher calling than making babies to perpetuate the Seranov line.”

“A
higher
calling?”

“Actually, it was my mother who gave me the idea. You see, I discovered it was far easier to be a dutiful daughter of Dhevyn hundreds of miles away in Omaxin than when actually confronted with Raban Seranov in person. In one of our many rather heated discussions, my mother threatened to pack me off to a temple somewhere if I didn't toe the line.” She smiled airily. “It suddenly occurred to me I wanted nothing more than to serve the Goddess.”

“
You
want to join the Sundancers?” he asked skeptically. “What about that noble speech you gave me about the stability of Dhevyn requiring the union of the Seranov and D'Orlon houses?”

“Alenor married Alexin,” she shrugged. “With the Queen of Dhevyn married to the Duke of Grannon Rock's second son, I didn't really think my contribution would make that much difference, do you?”

“We don't just accept anybody into the Sundancers, my lady,” he said.

“Well, you'd better let me in or there'll be hell to pay,” she threatened. “I didn't come all this way to have you refuse me. Anyway, changing the world's not a thing you can tackle on your own, Dirk. Even someone like you is going to need a hand from time to time.”

“And if I did need a hand, what makes you think I'd ask you?”

“I'm the only one who understands you.”

“Is that so?”

“Well, maybe not the only one. I think Misha understands you better than you'd like. He worked out what you were up to long before anyone else did.”

“You've seen him recently?”

She nodded. “At Alenor's wedding. He's a good man. Tia
is a very lucky girl. If he wasn't already taken, I might have made a play for him myself. Come to think of it, I did ask him to marry me once.”

“I thought you weren't interested in finding a husband?”

“I'm willing to make an exception for someone exceptional.”

“How exceptional, exactly?”

She smiled coyly. “Are you flirting with me?”

“Are
you
flirting with me, would be more to the point.” He reached out and took her hand. “Why did you really come?” he asked, drawing her closer.

“You
need
my help, Dirk. We still need to study all those notes from Omaxin. We need to finish dismantling the Shadowdancers. We need to find out when the next Age of Shadows is due …”

“No, we don't.”

“You don't
want
to know when the next Age of Shadows is due?”

“Well … actually …I already know,” he said. “Neris told me before I left Mil.”

Jacinta stared at him, open-mouthed.

“But that means …” She was too shocked to finish the sentence. It took her a moment to recover and then she swore in a very unladylike manner. “You've known all along?”

“The knowledge is useless, Jacinta. That was the reason Neris refused to tell anybody. He figured he was better off keeping Belagren in the dark than letting her discover she didn't have anything to worry about. He destroyed the murals in Omaxin that would give it away, built the traps in the Labyrinth and faked his death… all of it, just to prevent the Shadowdancers from learning they really had nothing to fear.”

Jacinta appeared too shocked to be angry at him. “So why did he tell you?”

“He had to tell someone, I suppose.”

“But …I mean …
damn
it, Dirk! Why didn't you
say
something? Why go through all of this? And what do you mean, the information is useless? We have to make plans! We have to prepare!”

“There's no point.”

“That's the
whole
point, Dirk!”

“The next Age of Shadows is about fifteen hundred years away, Jacinta.”

He'd never seen her lost for words before. She was almost too stunned to speak.

“So…so you went to Omaxin and pretended to look for the answers in the ruins. You made up that whole eclipse thing… you drove Antonov insane …” she spluttered. “You even went to war over it. You're unbelievable! Does anybody else know?”

He shook his head. “Not yet. That's one of the challenges ahead of us. To find a way to
make
it known so that fifteen hundred years from now people will be ready for it and another Belagren doesn't appear on the scene claiming it's a divine event and repeat the whole damn sorry business.” He grinned suddenly. “Maybe we'll rewrite the
Book of Ranadon
and make it compulsory reading in every school. There's a certain irony in that, don't you think?”

Jacinta shook her head, still having difficulty accepting Dirk had known the most valuable secret on Ranadon and not breathed a word of it to anyone. Then as if something else had just occurred to her, she looked up at him, searching his face. “You said
we.
”

“Well, if you insist on helping …” he said, raising her hand to his lips.

She snatched her hand from his. “Isn't the Lord of the Suns supposed to take a vow of celibacy or something?”

“Not required. I checked.”

“You did? Why?”

He smiled. “Because a certain very well-bred lady asked me once to do her a favor. I couldn't, in all conscience, let the matter go without checking to see if the next time she asked me to make mad, unbridled, passionate love to her, I was in a position to refuse.”

Jacinta scowled at him. “I don't know if I
want
anything to do with you after hearing you've known all along when the Age of Shadows was due. No wonder Tia never trusted you. What
else are you plotting, Dirk Provin? What other terrible plans and secrets are lurking in that strange and devious mind of yours?”

“Don't worry. I plan to lead a very long and boring life from now on. I've done most of the terrible things I had to do.”

“Only
most
of them? You single-handedly changed the face of Ranadon, Dirk. Dear Goddess! What else is there
left
to do?”

“I want to find out if lions are real,” he said.