Louise: A New Beginning (14 page)

***

I woke up to a bright light streaming in through the window. Rubbing my eyes, I sat up in my bed, trying to remember where I was.

The hotel room? What the. . . Oh, shit! Last night. . . Oh, shit!!!

“Louise?” I asked slowly, turning to my right, hoping to see her still asleep, but the bed next to me was empty. “Louise?” I called again. But no one answered.

I checked the bathroom and the terrace, but she was not there.

She left. . .
I started to panic and feel a little frantic, knowing I may have very well fucked up the only good thing in my life.

Of course, after what we had done last night, I should have never expected her to stay.

God, I was being a selfish pig. She probably hates me even more now. Ugh, it serves me right. . . I deserve her hatred. I deserve worse.

I looked at the messy bed and my clothes lying on the floor, and then the memories from last night filled my mind.

Man, was she amazing, so responsive, so beautiful. She let me make my every fantasy about her come true. She never once tried to stop me. If I didn’t know better, I would say she enjoyed it as much as I did. But I was sure she did that more for me, than for herself. Was it a sacrifice she made to please me? To make me believe that I did mean something to her? Or was it a final good-bye that she came here to say before she would leave me forever?

Whatever it was, I needed to see her, to ask all those questions and get the answers. I didn’t want any more uncertainty between us.

I took a quick shower, got dressed, and called Christopher.

“Do you know where Louise is?” I asked.

“Good morning to you too,
Sir,”
he responded in his usual smart-ass manner
.
“And yes, I know where she is – at school.”

“Did she go by the house before going there?”

“Yes.”

“Did she take her things with her?”

“Depends on what things you are talking about. She only took books and a few dresses with her, why?”

So she wasn’t planning on moving out today. . .or at least she hasn’t done it yet anyway. That had to be a good sign, right? I breathed a sigh of relief.

“Never mind. Did you manage to get the information I needed?” I asked Christopher.

It was Saturday morning, and Louise and I were supposed to pay Debora Griffin a visit. Though after last night, I wasn’t sure if she still wanted to go with me, or see me ever again for that matter.

“Yes, you can find the files on your iPad. It’s under the passenger seat of your car.”

As always, the man had taken care of everything.

“Thank you, Christopher. I’ll read them as soon as I…see Louise.”

“I really hope you
will
find time to read them.”

“Why wouldn’t I?”

“Well. . . I suppose after last night, you won’t have much time for reading now.”

“And what exactly makes you think so?”

“Oh, nothing in particular. Just, you know, the general atmosphere in the house. . .”

What was he trying to say?

“What did Louise tell you about last night?” I asked.

“Oh, trust me, I didn’t want to know the details. But she didn’t need to tell me anything. . . Her face said it all.”

“For God’s Sake, Christopher, can you stop trying to be mysterious? I’m not in the mood for riddles today.”

“I can imagine. . .”

Ugh, the old man obviously enjoyed getting on my nerves. Even if he didn’t say much, his choice of words said everything he wouldn’t say aloud.

“I’ll call you later,” I said, hanging up the phone. Sometimes, when I was talking to Christopher it felt like I was five years old again, afraid of being punished for my misbehavior. Only I wasn’t a kid anymore, and my misbehavior didn’t have anything to do with toys or fights with other kids. Now all the bad things I did, I did with only one person. . .

I pulled into the parking lot of
Balero
and looked at my watch, it showed midday. I didn’t know how many classes Louise was going to have today, so I thought I would send her a text message before going in and tracking her down like a stalker.

“I’m outside. Can you come here for a moment?”

She responded no more than ten seconds later. “Are you sure ‘a moment’ will be enough. . .?”

I wasn’t sure how to react to her words. Either she was teasing me, or saying she was still mad at me. Go figure.

Okay. . . I took a deep breath, and typed, “Depends on what you need that moment for. . .”

Send.

“Be right there,”
she texted back.

A few minutes later, I saw her coming out of the doors to the school, with her came the blond guy she was dancing with yesterday at the competition.

They stopped at the stairs, he kissed her on the cheek and left.

What the fucking fuck? I thought to myself. Who the hell does he think he is? Do they always share a kiss when saying good-bye?

Oh, come freaking on, dude, there’s nothing wrong with a friendly kiss on the cheek
, my inner voice said. Besides, less than twenty-four hours ago I thought about giving her a break, letting her have more freedom, and stopping acting like a paranoid boyfriend, sneaking around to make sure no dude came to flirt with or kiss my girl on the cheek. I even thought about leaving her forever, and just walking away. . .

Well, yeah, that was before last night happened.

Louise looked in the direction of the parking lot, spotted my car, and walked over to where I had been waiting for her. I inhaled deeply, wishing myself good luck and got out of the car.

“Morning,” I said, as she came closer.

“Morning,” she said in response. She didn’t look like she was angry, in fact, she looked like was trying to keep herself from laughing at me. Fucking great.

“Are you done with your classes for today?” I asked.

“Yes.” She tried to hide her smile, but I saw its traces shining all over her face.

“Good. Get in the car.”

“So bossy. . . You love being bossy, don’t you, Mr. Blair?”
Ugh, I wish she would stop and just say what she is thinking.
There was so much irony in her eyes; her knowing smirk completed the picture.

“I think you have had enough time with me to know that I do, Ms. Woods. As a matter of fact,
I love it
.”

She rolled her eyes, walked around the car, opened the door, and sat in the passenger seat, without saying another word. I got behind the wheel and started the engine.

“Where are we going?” She asked after a short pause.

“We had plans for today, remember? We are going to Debora’s. But before that, we need to talk. . .”

Louise

We stopped at a small park, Will shut down the engine and said, “I wanted to apologize for last night. . .” He didn’t look at me. His hands were still on the wheel, his eyes lowered to the car’s emblem on the wheel.

“What exactly are you apologizing for?” I asked, a little irritated. Until this very moment, I truly believed we both enjoyed what had happened last night, no matter how wrong it felt in the beginning.

“I was not being me, Louise. I was angry and drunk and. . . It will never happen again, I promise.”

“Like. . .never ever?”

He turned to look at me, a silent question frozen in his eyes. I took a moment to study him. He was still wearing the outfit from last night. Apparently, he didn’t stop by the house to get changed. A five-o’clock shadow covered his cheeks and chin. He looked a little tired, which was not surprising at all, considering we fell asleep at around five in the morning. And until then, we were too busy making love, trying to catch up on all those months we spent apart, we didn’t have time to think about rest. And honestly, I still felt like going back to
The Bay
and doing it all over again. Only it looked like Will wasn’t thrilled with the idea of having that kind of adventure again.
Does he think what we did was wrong? Because I had fun, I have never had more fun. . .

“Louise. . . About what happened last night. . . It was not right.”

Oh, yup, there it is. It was not right. . .

“Are you being serious right now?” I asked a little too loud. “Why do you always want everything to be perfect?”
Ugh!

“Don’t you want that too? Aren’t you trying to live a perfect life, with nothing
‘wrong or bad’
involved, including me?”

“Will, please. . . I know I shouldn’t have pushed you away for so long, but I thought I was doing what would be the best for the both of us. I thought. . . God, now I know I was being stupid, but do we really need to talk about it, again?”

“Hell, yes! Because I don’t understand you, Louise. I thought I knew you, but I don’t. Tell me, why did you let me do. . .all those things to you last night?”

“Because I wanted them too!” I flared. “I didn’t let you do anything that I wouldn’t want myself. How can you not see that – I’m not mad at you, I don’t blame you for anything. . . I love you, Will. And I don’t want to change anything. I just. . .want to be with you. I’m tired of running, I really am. And last night. . . I gave myself to you because that was what I wanted to do, I wanted to be yours, completely, unconditionally. And I don’t regret a moment of it, of being with you, of being yours again.”

Will shook his head, sighing. “We shouldn’t have done it so. . .”

“Passionately?”

“We should have waited. . . I should have waited. I should have given you more time...”

“Will, stop it, stop! You didn’t do anything against my will. Do you hear me? I wanted you as much as you wanted me! If you regret what happened between us, then I don’t think there’s any point in being together any longer. Because what I felt last night was love. And if you felt something different, just tell me, and I’ll leave.”

“Louise, please. . .” He reached for my face, cupping it in his palms. “That isn’t what I was saying,” he said softly.

“Then I don’t get it. . . What are you trying to say?” I felt like I would cry if he told me we couldn’t be together anymore. I would probably die right then and there.

“I love you, Louise. So much.” He moved closer, placing a small kiss on my lips. “And I don’t regret even a second of last night. How could I? It was amazing, you were amazing. I still can’t believe we spent a whole night making love, over and over again, like we couldn’t get enough of each other. But. . . I still feel like I need to apologize for my rudeness. I didn’t mean it. It’s just that, I was tired of waiting for you. And yes, I was one step away from giving up on you, on us. If you didn’t show up in the hotel last night, I would probably be on a flight to Paris right now, I don’t know. . . When you showed up, I had just been thinking about how I was going to just leave. . .forever. . .”

I couldn’t keep holding back my tears. They ran down my cheeks, like rivers of pain that I couldn’t suppress. Will’s every word felt like a sharp blade against my skin, leaving bleeding scratches all over me.

“But you will stay, won’t you?” I asked in a trembling voice.

He smiled, kissing away my tears, one by one. “I will. I can’t imagine my life without you, Louise.”

“I’m sorry,” I said, feeling like it was my turn to apologize.

“For what?” He asked, still holding my face in his palms.

“For making you suffer so much, for leaving you, for everything. . . I know you have every right to leave and never want to see me again, but please, Will. . . Don’t do this. Don’t leave. . . I promise, I will change. For you, for myself.”

“But I don’t want you to change, Louise. I just want you to let me love you, be the man you can rely on, the man you trust and want to see by your side.”

“I never stopped trusting you. I never doubted your feelings for me. And last night, when I saw the consequences of everything I did to you, I realized that was not what I wanted, it was not what I expected to see one day. I saw you, and you were broken and lost. And I couldn’t stop blaming myself for that. Because it was all my fault.”

“I won’t deny it, I felt like crap last night, and you know why?” He asked.

“Why?” I responded quietly.

“Because I came to watch you dance, and I saw you from a different point of view. I saw a Louise that I didn’t know anything about. I saw your life outside of our small world. And then, I believed that was all you needed. And I thought there wasn’t a place for me in your life. I stayed until the end of the competition, I saw you win, and then I left, without saying a word. Because I couldn’t make myself stay. . . I didn’t want to see you give up on what you deserved because of me. I would never forgive myself for taking your dreams away from you. And, damn it, I still feel like I don’t fit in your life, Louise. I still think that scratching myself out if it would be the best thing I could do for you. But I can’t do that…I can’t make myself leave. Regardless of how much easier your life would be without me.”

“What the hell are you talking about? Easier? Without you? Do you really believe I will be able to enjoy my life if I don’t have you?”

“I don’t know. . .”

“Oh, Will, you are so wrong. All I want and need is you.”

“What about dancing? What about Sabine’s proposal? Isn’t it what you have always wanted?”

“How did you know about her proposal?”

He let go of my face, leaning against the back of his seat, his eyes still on me. He took one of my hands in his and kissed it gently. “Sabine told me. And I think you should accept it.”

I guess it was one of those things that I didn’t know how to tell Will about. And yes, I was afraid he wouldn’t approve of it.

“Do you really think I should accept it? Will you be okay if I do?”

“Well. . . I might die of jealousy, once in a while, but in general. . . Yes, I think I will be able to live with it.”

“Are you angry at me for not telling you about it?”

“Honestly? I’m not. . . I’m a little disappointed maybe, but definitely not angry. Why didn’t you tell me about Sabine’s proposal? Were you afraid I would make you decline it?”

“No. . . I simply thought you might not like it. But I never thought you would make me decline it. I know you love me and you want me to be happy. And you know how happy I am when I am dancing.”

“I do. I saw it again yesterday, during the competition. And yes, I was jealous because of the way your partner was touching you. . .” He lowered his eyes, as if he was ashamed to tell me about his jealously.

I smiled. “You shouldn’t be jealous. It was just a dance, a performance. But when I dance for you, it’s something completely different.”

“I know. I can feel it.”

“Does this mean we have a truce?”

He laughed quietly. “I didn’t know we have been in a war.”

“Well, it kind of felt like we were last night. . . Though if you ever feel like fighting with me again, do it like you did last night.”

Will shut his eyes for a moment, then looked at me again, saying, “Stop tempting me. You know how terrible I am at resisting you.”

I leaned forward and kissed him on the lips.

A few moments later, I said, “Maybe we should discuss what we are going to talk about with Debora?”

“Yeah, we’d better.” He gave me another longing look and then pointed to my seat, saying, “My iPad is under your seat. Grab it and open the file named
‘Debora’
. Christopher has found some information about her, but I didn’t have time to read the files.”

“Don’t you think we should go home first and find you something else to wear?”

He looked down at his wrinkled shirt and trousers. “Right, I didn’t think about that.”

I giggled, taking the iPad from under my seat. I turned it on and started looking for the folder.

“What did you ask Christopher to find out about Debora?”

“I don’t know what she has been doing since she left the company, so I asked him to find out more about her new job and the people she has been working for.”

I found the folder with Debora’s name, opened the first file in it and gasped. “I knew it!”

“What is it, Louise?”

“I knew I had seen her somewhere before you showed me those pictures of your father, but I couldn’t remember where. Now I know.” I turned the iPad so that Will could see the picture I was talking about.

“Is that your father standing next to her?”

“Yes. I saw this picture on his website as well.”

“Do you think this means she works for him now?” Will asked.

“Let’s see. . .” I opened another file from the folder. That one was a document with Debora’s short biography and. . . “You have got to be kidding me,” I muttered, reading the list of the places where she used to work. To say that it was short was the understatement of the century. “She’s been with Montgomery all this time,” I said.

“What?”

“She started working for him almost ten years ago, right after she left your father’s company.”

“But. . . How did they meet? Does that also mean Rea was right and that my dad did know yours, years ago?”

“Wait, there’s something else here. According to the records, Debora knew Montgomery long before the boat accident happened. As well as your father. . .”

“That’s impossible.” Will pulled over on the side of the road, and took the iPad from my hands, looking through the files. “They have known each other for almost. . .twenty years? Why didn’t I ever hear my father mention Montgomery’s name?”

“Maybe because he didn’t want to tell anyone they knew each other.”

“But why? Why would it be a secret?”

“Do you think your mom might know anything?”

“I don’t think so. My dad never told her anything about what was going on in the company. He was sure that women didn’t need to know about business stuff, unless they were a part of it.”

“What about Christopher? How is it possible that he didn’t know Montgomery?”

“That’s weird, right?”

I shrugged. “Maybe there were things that your dad preferred to keep to himself.”

“Wait. . .what the hell is that?”

“What is it, Will?”

“The records say that the company my father was about to make a deal with the day he died used to belong to Montgomery. Levi Donald was its president, but the company was founded by your father. Levi was just a cover for your father’s name.”

I swallowed hard, my heart raced.

“You don’t think what I think, do you?” Will asked, still staring at the iPad in his hands.

“I don’t know what to think, actually.”

“This is what Rea was trying to tell you. . . When Fletcher became a senator, he had to stop his business activities. He faked the deal and made everyone believe that he sold his company, but in reality, it never stopped being his. And the file says that Debora headed his company right after she left my father’s.”

“We need to talk to her,” I said. “Like right now.”

“That is exactly what we are going to do. I don’t think she will care about my wrinkled shirt. I need to ask her a few questions before I can think about anything else.”

Will started the engine again and we sped down the road, and to the address mentioned in the files, the one Drew named as the place where Debora lived now.

We were disappointed beyond words when we came to Debora’s, she was not at home. As a matter of fact, the entire place looked like it had been locked for years and no one lived there.

“Are you sure this is the right address?” I asked Will.

“Yes. I have checked it several times.”

I walked over to one of the windows and looked inside, trying to see through the half-torn curtains.

“There’s no furniture inside,” I said to Will.