Love in the Balance (40 page)

“I’m not sure if once a week would be enough. You’ll probably be harassing me for more.”

“No, I promise.” Bailey raised his hands in surrender. “Once a week over checkers. I solemnly swear I won’t allow you to be tricked into giving advice anywhere else or at any other time. I’m firm.”

Molly sat amazed. How could Bailey handle her father so easily when she still couldn’t manage him? But then he had a knack for taming strong-willed Lovelaces.

“My misgivings haven’t disappeared,” Thomas said, “and I’m trying to look out for your best interests, but if you’re absolutely sure . . .”

“Anything we can do to protect your health,” Bailey said. “So, Mr. Mooney, if you’ll hand us a pen, let’s make it legal.”

Besides the scratching of the metal nub on the paper, the room was silent. Bailey handed Molly the pen and she had
Molly Parmelia
written when he halted her with a gentle touch to her back.

“Don’t forget your new name.”

“Oh, you’re right.” She bit her tongue and scripted out
Garner
with a flourish. “How’s that?”

“Beautiful.” But he wasn’t looking at her penmanship.

“So what now?” her mother asked Mr. Mooney. “When does it change hands?”

“Immediately. I have a note for the full deposit. Bailey and Molly will make payments to you as agreed upon. You retain the house and the lawn directly surrounding. The Garners now own the business, all the equipment, and the property associated with it. The accounts at the bank will be transferred to their name by the end of the business day.”

“So really, Thomas, not much has changed,” Adele said. “Bailey will be there working, and you’ll be free to come and go from the house as you please.”

“And you won’t have to go over the books every evening,” Molly added, “although I’d still like to come over for supper. I’ll miss Lola’s cooking while living at the parsonage.”

“Of course, dear,” her mother said. “Now that you’re married, it’ll be easier on all of us.”

Molly felt the familiar discouragement creeping up on her, but before it could settle, Bailey stepped in.

“Time to go, my bride. We have a long ride home.”

“You might as well take our surrey,” her father said. “Since I’m now a man of leisure, I’d like to take a few days to enjoy town. You, on the other hand, better scurry back to work.”

Molly rose and ran her hands down her silk wedding gown. If she could survive the humiliation of the night ahead, they’d be fine.

32

The last time Bailey was alone with Molly in this surrey, he’d determined to make her his wife. It’d taken much longer than he’d expected, but he’d finally done it right.

Besides an axle that needed grease, the surrey was quiet. The waving swells of tall grass rustled in the evening breeze. Occasionally Bailey threw out a juicy remark, hoping to entice Molly into a conversation, but she only nibbled. What was she so nervous about anyway?

Since she’d chased him and the money up to Lockhart, Molly had conducted a tightly organized campaign to secure the mill. She’d been so focused on the business that she’d never questioned his plans for their wedding. Had she expected him to back out? Was she only now realizing the permanence of their vows?

She looked lovely in her fancy getup. He’d feared that she might not appreciate the extravagance of a public wedding, but his gamble had paid off. Molly always dressed to be the center of attention, whether it was her wedding or not. She had seemed pleased with the ceremony, so what was bothering her now? He snuck a sideways glance at her. One by one, she pulled the petals off her rose bouquet, leaving a trail like bread crumbs to find her way home.

“It’s been a long day,” he said.

“Um-hum
.
”
Her fingers faltered as she tried to catch another petal while the surrey bounced.

“We’re almost home.”

She didn’t answer.

Bailey rested his elbows on his knees and watched the horse’s ears twitch, dodging the mosquitoes that were rising from the creek banks as the sun set.

Was she nervous? They weren’t strangers. She trusted him. At least until last winter she’d trusted him, but then things had changed. They both had changed.

It wasn’t until he saw the horse’s ears rotate toward him that he realized he’d sighed. He straightened to take a look at Molly’s decimated bouquet. Was she thinking of Edward? The thought soured his stomach. Maybe he was better off not knowing.

The horse required a tug to convince it to turn onto Church Street instead of Mill Street. Molly resisted even more.

“Can’t we go to the mill?”

“Tonight? No one is there.”

“But we own it now. Don’t you want to see it?”

“There’s another piece of property I’m more curious about.” He gave her the beguiling smile that usually earned him a halfhearted reprimand, but Molly wasn’t looking. His heart sunk further. “It’s your day, my dear. Let’s go to the mill.”

His fears multiplied with each moment that she failed to reassure him. The reasons Molly had refused to marry him in the first place returned to mock him. He wasn’t rich and she’d always wanted to handle investments and property. Was he merely a means to that end? Had she settled on running her parents’ mill and needed his help to make it a success?

They rolled toward the riverbed. The buildings and machinery, the belts, the stacks of lumber, the barns holding wagon teams should have thrilled him, should have filled him with the pride of ownership, but he was more concerned by the distance growing between his new bride and him.

Bailey stopped the wagon by the vacant office and came around to help Molly step down. As soon as her feet touched the gravel drive, she strode toward the river, leaving him behind.

“Molly, I don’t know what’s upset you, but I’d think you could at least talk to me about it. If you want to be alone, I understand.” He followed in her wake. “All right, that’s a fib. I don’t understand, but I’m willing to hear you out.”

At the riverbank she stopped. She pulled her hatpin out from her hat and let the plumed creation float to the ground. She reached behind her and fumbled with the buttons at her waist, her eyes filling with frustrated tears.

“What are you doing?” Should he thank his lucky stars or have her put into an asylum?

She wrestled her overskirt down to her ankles and pulled her white petticoats free. Her hands stretched behind her shoulder blades as she tried to jerk more buttons loose. “Are you going to just stand there and stare?” she asked.

“Yes, I am.”

Probably not the best answer. She was upset and deserved a more sensitive response, but his manners had plumb given out.

She spun away, leaving a lacy trail behind as she marched to the thick undergrowth on the bank. He barely got a peek at her chemise cover before she disappeared from view.

“How about I’ll wait here until you tell me what to do?” he called.

The branches swayed violently. Bailey tried not to imagine what articles of clothing she was wrestling off, but what was he supposed to do? This didn’t sound like any honeymoon story he’d ever heard.

———

Molly loved Bailey. She wanted to marry him like nothing she’d ever wanted before, but since their engagement she’d forced it from her mind. Once they were married, she knew this moment would arrive. Unavoidable. She’d tried to forget, tried to pretend that something would intervene and it wouldn’t be as difficult as she feared, but here she was and it was worse. Her hurt couldn’t be removed. Bailey couldn’t be spared.

With shaking hands she shed her boots and stockings and stepped off the steep bank into the river. The cool water swirled around her knees. Her chemise floated as she waded deeper—waist high, shoulder high. Until this moment she didn’t know what she was going to do, but once here it seemed natural. Years had passed since she’d last taken a dip in the river. She’d forgotten what it felt like to be this free, but she also felt exposed.

Wrapping her arms across her chest, she hovered upriver behind the stand of bushes where her gown lay, refusing to let the water carry her any further. She was exposed, and not for the first time. This wasn’t the first time, and Bailey knew it. She hadn’t been forced. She hadn’t been abused. She’d been willing.

And now she had nothing to give Bailey that was new. She had nothing left.

A shadow fell across the water. She lifted her head. Bailey stood on the bank, his jacket and shoes removed. Molly didn’t have to drop much further for the water to hit her chin, but she did anyway.

“I love you, Molly.”

He didn’t ask. He didn’t require an explanation. But he deserved one.

“I wish . . .” She let the water cover her mouth. Her hair floated in front of her, wrapping around her neck. She pulled the tendrils away. “I wish this water could wash away every bad thing I’ve done. I wish the memories could float away, over the dam and out to the sea.”

“It’s not water that cleanses us. You know that.”

Yes, praise God, she knew that. “I’ve been forgiven, but I haven’t made it right with you. I can’t make it right. All I can do is promise that I’ll be faithful to you from this moment on.”

“And that’s enough.”

She watched the ripples pass, savored the caress of the water as it glided across her skin and tugged on her petticoats. She released her arms and let her fingers spread, dividing the water into ribbons as it slipped through. God had forgiven her. Bailey accepted her. Could she forgive herself?

Since returning home, Molly had found the courage to keep living. She’d learned to soldier on, to fight for her future, but she had forgotten how to be vulnerable.

Molly took a deep breath and submerged herself completely. Her scalp tingled as the air bubbles floated from her locks. She was weightless, innocent in this hidden world where no one could accuse her, no one knew her past. But she couldn’t stay forever.

She lifted her head and waited for the water to clear from her face before opening her eyes. But at a mighty splash she had to peek. Bailey had disappeared, and the ripples in the water gave her a clue as to his whereabouts. They moved in her direction, bubbles outlining a path that was coming uncomfortably close. He emerged a few feet away and waited, as if watching for her reaction.

“Oh, Bailey. Your suit! It’s brand-new.”

“Don’t worry. The expensive parts are hanging over there on the bushes.”

“Good. I didn’t want you to ruin—” She stopped as he stood his full height. His white shirt clung to him like wet paint. She hadn’t realized how bright the moonlight was.

He seemed unaware of his effect on her but watched the river as it swept past them. “I think you have the right idea, Molly. We need a fresh start. You aren’t the only one with a past to repent of.”

“Who? When?” To Molly’s knowledge, Bailey hadn’t seriously courted anyone besides her.

“I’m not talking about another woman. I took liberties with you that I had no right to. Even if you’d never met that other man, I still treated you with disrespect. I didn’t protect you as I should have.” His hands skimmed across the water’s surface. “So here we are, both needing forgiveness, and both forgiven. If doubts ever return, we can look back at tonight and remember releasing our mistakes and letting them float away. Cleansing every touch that ever dishonored you, mine included.”

“As far as the east is from the west?”

“So far hath He removed our transgressions from us.”

Once again, Molly closed her eyes. The crickets’ song echoed above the roar of the water flowing over the wheel. The tension in her neck eased. Water couldn’t come back up a dam. It was gone forever. And God was so good to give her this second chance, to give her one who understood her and loved her anyway.

Bailey touched her cheek, and she almost slipped to the bottom of the river, so great was the shock. The stream had lulled her as she floated in an ethereal cloud, but she wasn’t alone. A real-life flesh-and-blood man was with her—waiting.

“Steady now,” he whispered. His eyes were so full of love she’d come closer to drowning in them than the river. “I’m ready to let go and begin anew. Are you?”

Molly nodded. Their paths had covered unwelcomed terrain that had left them both tarnished, but between the two of them there would never be another stain.

He stroked her cheek with the back of his hand. Trailing his finger down her nose, Bailey outlined her lips and pressed his fingers flat against them, covering them completely. Molly tightened her mouth against the pressure, giving him a silent kiss.

The water sped as it coursed between them. He stepped closer. The current quickened as it rushed through the narrowing channel, and then it was no more. Warmth replaced the cooling stream as Bailey closed the gap. He lowered his mouth over hers as rivulets cascaded off of him and mingled with her tears. She wrapped her arms around his neck and anchored herself on his strength, no longer alone in the fight against the current that could carry her away.

Love and security. Molly had offered one to get the other and had almost lost both. But once the counterfeits were removed, she could appreciate the man who’d been there all along—the one who even now was trying to catch his breath, forehead pressed against hers, droplets sparkling in his lashes.

“I’ve tried to be a cowboy, a blacksmith, a minister, and a cobbler, but I finally found my calling.”

“And what would that be?”

“Partnering with you to take on the ills of the world, making our corner of Texas a better place, and keeping you somewhere between bliss and exasperation.”

“I’m dangerously close to one extreme.” Molly brushed the water from his face. “I couldn’t tell you which, but the rest of your plan sounds perfect.”

He smiled. “Then it’s time to take you home.”

Holding her hand, he led her to the riverbank, never giving her a chance to argue—and that was fine. As she climbed out, her wet clothing was heavy, but her heart was light. She would follow him through thick and thin, but there was no need to follow him home.

She was already there.

Regina Jennings
is a graduate of Oklahoma Baptist University with a degree in English and a minor in history. She has worked at the
Mustang News
and at First Baptist Church of Mustang, along with time at the Oklahoma National Stockyards and various livestock shows. She lives outside of Oklahoma City with her husband and four children.