Love Me if You Dare (3 page)

All the while, the Bachelor Blogger continued to speculate on Rafe’s relationship with the woman he’d rescued. Day in and day out, reminding Rafe she existed. As if he could forget anything about her. She’d been by his side day and night until he was finally coherent and out of the woods. She looked as good to him exhausted and disheveled as she did made up and glamorous. So, no, he didn’t need the blogger to
remind him of what he’d said about her before he’d passed out.

He thought about her all day.

He saw her in his dreams at night.

And wondered constantly what would happen if they gave in to the desire neither had ever mentioned aloud.

Rafe hadn’t heard from Sara since he’d left the hospital, but he remembered everything—from the warmth in her eyes to the relief on her face when he’d finally come to. But the last time he’d seen her, she’d been cool and distant, a far cry from the woman who’d sat by his bedside and held his hand. He had no choice but to respect the boundaries she’d erected. Because as much as he was attracted to her, they wanted different things out of life. And he’d rather keep her friendship than lose her after an affair ended.

He was on medical leave until cleared for return—at least four to six weeks, he’d been told. To add insult to injury—literally—he’d also been reprimanded for violating his negotiator training by taking down the subject before exhausting every peaceful option first. There was no way to explain how he’d known for certain Sara would anticipate his action and duck. No way to justify his actions.

All of which left him stuck with too much time on his hands to think about that night. He was going stir-crazy sitting around the apartment, and he was
miserable with the attention when he stepped out. For the first time in a long time, he missed his place by the lake and the privacy and serenity it offered. Missed the smell of Lake Ontario, where he’d grown up and spent hours with his father and siblings and cousins, learning to swim, playing ball and often doing nothing but annoying the crap out of each other. The very thing he’d moved away from was the thing he needed now.

Maybe it was getting knifed and facing his mortality. Maybe it was the stifling feeling created by the Bachelor Blog, but Rafe needed to get away. It was summertime, and he craved fresh air and sunshine. The house he owned on Lake Ontario beckoned to him.

His parents would be thrilled if he came home for a while. They’d left the city once he’d been discharged from the hospital, but his mother called a few times a day to make sure he was eating, resting and taking care of himself. She’d feel much better knowing he was close by while he recuperated, but in truth he needed it for himself.

Decision made, Rafe thought. The Bachelor Blogger would just have to make do without him.

S
ARA TESTED HER WEIGHT
on her leg, the same way she’d done every morning for the last two weeks. Once again, pain shot through her knee. She groaned and waited for it to subside. The neoprene brace she’d been given in the emergency room provided support but did nothing for the throbbing, aching discomfort she lived with constantly. She was still icing the swelling and taking anti-inflammatory medication. And still hoping her medical leave would be temporary, not the end of her career.

She glanced at the painkillers on the kitchen counter and shook her head. Being woozy wasn’t her thing. She’d suffer through.

It was only nine-thirty in the morning, and she’d been up for hours. The rest of the day loomed long before her, so a knock at her door was a welcome distraction.

She hobbled over to the door, leaving the crutches behind. The doctor had said weight-bearing was tolerated, and she needed to tolerate more and more.

She glanced through the peephole. “Coop!” she said, opening the door for her friend.

“Is this a good time?”

She nodded. “It’s a perfect time. I’m sick and tired of sitting around feeling sorry for myself, so come in and take my mind off my problems.”

Coop followed her inside, shutting the door behind him.

“Why aren’t you at work?” she asked. He was usually out the door early and back home late at night.

“I took the day off. How are you feeling?” he asked, glancing at her knee. “And the truth this time.”

Sara frowned. Though she’d been avoiding answering anyone’s questions about her injury, pretending she was fine, she couldn’t lie to her friend.

She wasn’t okay. And it wasn’t just her leg that hurt. If the knee didn’t heal properly, her days at the NYPD were over.

“I’m scared it won’t heal enough for me to return to active duty. It’s all I can think about or focus on.”

He looped an arm around her shoulder.

As an only child, Sara thought of Coop as the brother she’d never had. He was dark-haired, good-looking, charming, smart, and she’d never slept with him. Never wanted to. Together they made a lie of the claim that men and women couldn’t be
just friends,
and she was grateful to have him in her life.

“I won’t tell you not to worry, but I am going to
suggest you do something to keep busy and not think about it all the time.”

“Easier said than done when I’d rather be active than sitting around staring at the four walls.”

“How about reading the paper, then?” he asked, gesturing to the
Daily Post
on the table, still wrapped in delivery plastic.

She glanced at the dreaded paper and shuddered. Ever since Rafe had been named the newest bachelor, she’d stopped reading that particular newspaper. She still had it delivered for Coop’s byline, nothing more. Of course ignoring the paper didn’t mean she wasn’t thinking…and dreaming about Rafe. She hadn’t been this obsessed when they were partnered together, because back then he’d been off-limits. He’d belonged to someone else. A free Rafe, one who’d admitted he noticed her as a woman, was dangerous to her peace of mind.

Coop cleared his throat. Obviously he had something to tell her.

“This isn’t just a social visit, is it?” she asked warily.

He shook his head. “Not entirely.”

“Let me have it.” She gestured for him to talk.

“You know that low profile you’re still supposed to keep?” He tapped on the newspaper with one hand.

Sara stiffened. “Don’t tell me. The blog’s writing about me again?”

“See for yourself.”

He remained silent while she opened the newspaper and paged through to the correct section.

“That’s just freaking fantastic. Turn the city’s attention on me now,” she muttered. “This blog is just…wrong.”

“Maybe it’s right.”

She whipped her head around to face him. “Excuse me? Aren’t you the man who was inundated with women’s underwear thanks to the blog?”

“I did meet Lexie.” He raised an eyebrow, as if daring her to argue.

“You met Lexie thanks to being featured on the
TV news after you stopped a robbery. The blog had nothing to do with it.”

He shrugged. “Whatever. The point is, I met Lexie. And that’s another reason I’m here today. I have something to tell you.” The beginnings of smile pulled at his lips.

“What is it? Are things good between you and Lexie?”

“You could say that.” The smile turned into a full-fledged grin. “We’re going house-hunting in the suburbs.”

She blinked, startled. “Wow. I knew you’d settled things after the auction, but…moving? White picket fence and all?” She leaned back in her seat, more than a little stunned.

He hadn’t mentioned marriage, but, divorced once, Coop still believed in the institution. Lexie, the world traveler, had obviously come around despite her initial reluctance for anything permanent. Sara couldn’t think of anything more permanent than buying a home together.

“It’s called compromise. We’ll travel and have a home base.” The light in his eyes told the whole story.

“I’m happy for you, Coop. I really am. I will miss having you as my neighbor, though.”

“Hey, I work in the city. At least for now. That’s another piece of news. I may give my fiction writing a
real shot. You know, full-time in between world traveling. Lexie and I are still working out the details.”

Sara shook her head. Things had changed almost overnight, she thought. “I hope all your dreams come true. You deserve it. So, she’d better treat you right.” But Sara no longer worried about Lexie’s motives for being with Coop.

They were truly in love. Apparently, it had existed for some. Ever the cynic, she still wasn’t a believer.

“Back at you,” Coop said. “Don’t forget you’ll come visit us. We’ll see each other all the time.”

Sara forced a smile. She knew that once he moved out, their lives would take very different paths.

“You could have the same thing, you know,” Coop said. “If you would ever open yourself up.”

She rolled her eyes. “Here we go. A critique of my belief in marriage.”

“Lack of belief,” he corrected her.

She gripped the armrest even harder. “I guess I need to explain my family tree to you again. Police work and marriage can’t coexist,” she reminded him. “My grandparents fought over the hours and danger, broke up, Grandpa moved out, the kids suffered. They’d make up, he’d move back in and everyone would be miserable. One of my uncles is a divorced and unhappy SOB because his wife never let him see his kids. My aunt holds the distinction of being the first female cop in the family. She was so proud.
Her husband wasn’t. He took off because he couldn’t handle his wife being the more powerful one. He hated the danger, too. One of my cousins died in the line of duty, leaving his wife to raise their baby. She’s resentful, angry and not the best mother at this point. And we won’t even mention my parents….” She paused for a long, deep breath.

Coop, who’d been eyeing her, just waiting for a chance to jump in, finally spoke. “What about the one and only success story? Why deliberately leave them out?” he asked, challenging her the way only a nauseatingly happy man in a relationship could.

Her cousin Renata—Sara had called her Reni since they were kids—she and her husband
were
happily married.

So Sara couldn’t argue the point. “They have to work damn hard to make their marriage work. And in my opinion, life is hard enough. Being a cop is stressful enough. Why add more strain to the mix when the odds are stacked against you?”

“Because happiness is worth it?” Coop challenged.

“Ugh.” She threw her hands up in the air. “Okay, enough sappy conversation.”

Her gaze fell to the newspaper, and a more important subject took precedence in her mind. “What am I going to do about this?” She pointed to the department-issued photo of herself after the stabbing
alongside one taken of her in her gown the night of the gala. “If your experience with this blog is any indication, the lunatics are going to turn out in droves,” she said in disgust.

Coop let out a knowing laugh, but he didn’t contradict her, either.

She pulled her hair off her neck and knotted it on top of her head. “Is it me, or is it hot in here? I thought the super said he’d fixed the AC problem.”

“He says a lot of things. It’s warm,” he agreed. “But I think you’re more nervous about being the center of the Bachelor Blogger’s attention than anything else.”

“Of course I’m nervous. I’m supposed to lie low. When my captain and the district attorney see this…” She glanced at the paper, the cause of all her trouble. “This anonymous person works for your newspaper. Any idea who it could be?”

He shook his head. “And whoever knows, nobody’s talking.”

“Swell.”

Sara’s telephone rang, interrupting her. She glanced at Coop and picked up the receiver. “Hello?”

Captain Hodges was on the other end.

Sara listened, her stomach cramping more with every word he spoke. “No, I understand. Yes, I know, and I’ll let you know what I decide. Thanks for call
ing.” She hung up and faced Coop. “Know a reporter named Mark Pettit?”

Coop nodded. “A guy with few scruples. He’d sell his own mother for a story. Why?”

“He sold
me.
The
Journal
just published a story about the lady the Bachelor Blogger mentioned and her link to the notorious Morley murder. The entire city now knows I’m the star witness. And thanks to the Bachelor Blog, it’ll be easy for Morley’s partners or their associates to find me here.”

She shook her head in frustration, her mind already whirling with possibilities of how easily someone could get to her.

“Do you really think they’d go after a cop?” Coop asked.

“They stand to lose everything once I testify.” She held her hands out in front of her, weighing their choices. “Money versus murder. If I disappeared without a trace, who could prove John Morley, who’s in jail, or his partners had anything to do with it?”

“What are you going to do?” Coop asked.

Sara paused. “I’m really not sure.” She drummed her fingers on the nearest table.

“What did your captain say?” Coop gestured to the telephone.

“He thinks my injury puts me at greater risk.” She rose and paced the small length of her apartment, limping her way across and back, each step
reinforcing his point. “He says with this knee, I’m a sitting duck.”

Sara normally didn’t panic or overreact. She was a cop. She could handle herself in any situation. Except one in which she couldn’t protect herself. Thanks to her bum knee, she was in a position of weakness, not strength.

Sara hated feeling weak. “This whole situation pisses me off. The last thing I want to do is let someone run me out of my own apartment.”

“Pride could get you killed,” Coop said, concern in his voice. “Can they assign someone to watch you? Protection?”

Sara shook her head. “We’re shorthanded due to budget cuts, and the captain can’t waste men or man-hours babysitting me.” She groaned and rubbed her aching temples, the only alternative becoming clear.

“You need to get out of town,” Coop said.

“Maybe.” If the threat became real.

Although, where could she go? The cops in her family could handle the potential danger, but they were all scattered around the city, which didn’t help her escape from strangers who’d recognize her and report in to the Bachelor Blogger.

“It’s only until after you testify. Once Morley’s convicted, you can come home.”

She leaned against the side of the couch so she
could prop her knee on the cushion and rest. “I know, and I’ll think about it.”

“Seriously consider it?” he pressed.

She nodded. “I don’t have a death wish.”

He inclined his head, satisfied. “Good. So. Have you heard from Rafe?” Coop named the one person she hadn’t been able to push from her mind.

She narrowed her gaze, wary of why he’d bring it up now. “What does Rafe have to do with anything?”

Coop shrugged. “I’m just curious.”

Sara didn’t trust his motives. Happy coupled-up people always tried to push others into relationships, too. “Once Rafe was discharged from the hospital, we went our separate ways.”

More like she’d kept things cool during her last few visits so he’d be sure not to call. She told herself it was better this way. He took his relationships too seriously for her to risk dabbling. No matter how much she wanted to. And she did. Badly.

Coop shook his head. “You froze him out, didn’t you?” he asked in disgust.

He knew her too well.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” she lied. “We’re friends, that’s all. But these days we only speak to each other when there’s a reason. Like when I asked him to work security at the auction.”

Coop stared at her. Unwilling to break eye contact,
the reporter in him obviously willed her to crack and admit she wanted more from Rafe than friendship.

The cop who was a master at interrogation met him with a blank look of her own.

“Don’t you see how he looks at you?” Coop asked.

“Are you telling me you noticed?” she asked, secretly thrilled at the prospect that Coop might be right.

He grinned. “No. But Lexie did. And she said the sparks across the ballroom were electric. So why are you fighting what could be a good thing?”

Sara expelled a long breath. “Because Rafe is into commitment. Marriage. Family. That’s what he wants out of life. And I don’t.” But she wished he were here now.

He was the one person she trusted to keep her safe. When on patrol, she’d never worried, knowing he had her back. Just like on the rooftop, she’d known precisely what he intended, dove for cover at the right time, then assisted him in collaring the perp. He’d know what to do, and she’d feel better just knowing he was around.