Love Me ~ Like That (33 page)

“Bailey, you ran back to him! How could you run over here? If we have a problem, we talk about it. You sure as hell don’t run over to your ex’s house for comfort.” I turn away to calm myself down.

“Look, man, you can have the bitch. I’ll give her to you. She’s not even worth the trouble.” Hendrix stands.

“You’ll give me to him? I’m not a piece of property that can be traded or sold off to the highest bidder, Hendrix.” Bailey walks over and knees him as hard as she can in the balls. When he bends over in pain, she punches him squarely in the nose.

“Either you both leave or I’m calling the cops.” Hendrix cries while he is on the floor holding his crotch.

Bailey shakes her hand from her badass punch she delivered. I notice drops of blood on the plush white carpet and more on his shirt. I turn to leave because I’ve seen enough. Bailey is right behind me.

“Cash, wait. I was using the ladies’ room and then I was planning to leave.”

“It doesn’t change the fact that you ran over here, Bailey.”

Bailey shakes her head and reaches for my arm, but I shrug her off.

“I came to ask him why he took credit for something you were doing for me.”

She tries to get into my arms for a hug, but I can’t do that right now. I’m still too raw with pain. She was in his bedroom. I want to know the truth. “Is that all that happened?” I have to know if he touched her. If I need to kill him or not.

She searches my eyes. “Cash, I love you, I would never do that to you.” She smiles weakly. “Let’s go so we can talk about this somewhere privately. Please.” She rubs my arm.

I still don’t like this at all. We do need to talk, but I need to cool down first. “Bailey, I’m going home. I need to think about all of this. We can talk later.”

Bailey is in shock. She hasn’t moved a muscle. I want her to get in her Jeep and leave, but I want her to do that on her on accord.

I get in my truck, my eyes never leaving Bailey’s and hers never leaving mine. This still might be over. That’s not what I want but it may be inevitable.

Hendrix bringing extra medicine and provoking Papa makes perfect sense now. I’m sure Hendrix gave Papa extra morphine, and he admitted calling that agency on me. I’m glad Cash kicked his ass, but I had to get my punches in, too.

I’m torn now. I’m upset at what Cash kept from me, but I want to go to him. Only, he’s mad with me. I want to talk to him, but he needs space. I can be patient, though. I will wait and let him come to me. Meanwhile, I have a little lady to talk to about her note.

I pull into our driveway, but I don’t see Cash at home yet. When I go inside, I find Margie and Granny playing a game of cards.

Granny looks at me then says, “Margie, I think Bailey and I need to have a talk, if you could excuse us.”

“Sure thing, Addie. I’ll go home. Call if you need me.” She walks over and gives me a hug. “It will all work out.”

They must already know how I messed up. How I went and pushed away one of the best things in my life. The one person, who wasn’t my family, who loved me for being me. I have a history of making a mountain out of a molehill because of my temper. I want to be Cash’s everything, and now I’m probably his biggest mistake.

Granny makes her way to me. “Bailey, I want to talk to you. I want you to understand why I wrote up that letter and signed it. The letter wasn’t meant to hurt you or bring you pain. Those are my wishes when the time comes. I don’t want you to waste some of the most important years of your life tied down out here. If you want to go back to college, get married, or whatever it is, baby, I want you to do it. I want you to be happy, I appreciate everything you’ve done, but you need to live your life. When we are too much for Margie to handle, I want to be put in a nursing home. Will you please promise me that you will do that for me?”

I have full tears running down my face.

She pulls me in. “Shh, baby girl. There isn’t any reason to cry, go clean up and make back up with my soon to be grandson.”

I cry harder. “Granny, that’s just it, I don’t think he wants me anymore.” I shake my head. “When you mess up like I do all the time, you can’t keep a good guy.”

“Cash loves you, Bailey. I can see how much he loves you. How he respects you and all of us really. He will see reason. Besides, I thought you were the one mad with him.”

She glances at me confused. I’m trembling all over, dammit, for allowing myself to get that wrapped up over all of this. “I went to Hendrix’s house to confront him about taking credit for paying for all of your medical expenses. I decided, about the time I got to his door, I shouldn’t even be there, but he already was at the door holding it open. He pulled me into his apartment.” I get up to go get a glass of water. “When Cash arrived and found me there, he hit Hendrix several times. I found Hendrix was the one that called and reported me. I kneed him in his… uh, privates and then popped him in his nose.” Granny’s eyes are wide. “Cash didn’t want to go talk. He wanted me to leave him alone. I think it must be over. I can’t take all of this. My anxiety is on overload.”

She pats my head. “Go lay down for a while. Put some music on and see if you can’t take your mind off of it for a few minutes.”

“Okay. I love you, Granny, and whatever you want is what I want too,” I whisper to her. “I’ll be in my room, call me if you need me.” As I go to my bedroom, I hear the matchmaker get on the phone. To call her partner in crime, I have no doubt. I would like to hear what all is being said, but I’m sure it will hurt too much. I lay down to wallow in my self-pity. I’m allowed to. I wished I knew what was on Cash’s mind. Only if that Magic 8 Ball that Lizzie and I used to play with really worked so it could tell me what to do.

I’m not mad with Bailey. I’m hurt. It takes a lot to acknowledge that a little five foot nothing woman has hurt me. I think her running to Hendrix hurts more because I love Bailey, and I thought all of this was behind us. Not all of life is pretty. Sometimes things hurt. But it’s how we react to being hurt that matters. Sometimes we grow from it, and other times it tears us down. I’m determined to grow from this and come out with a stronger relationship. But Bailey has to understand, this is the last time she runs off and doesn’t talk to me about what is bothering her. That may have worked when she was a kid and dating young pricks like Hendrix, but that behavior doesn’t work for me. These are things that Bailey and I both need to work on, together.

I’m pacing the barn because I have all this built up energy I need to let out. I go to work on the barn. A hammer, some nails, and a few pieces of wood should help calm me down. I need this physical labor.

Mom comes out with some water. “Hey, Cash. I thought you might be thirsty. What are you out here doing?”

“Just working on the barn, Mom. Working. On. The. Barn.” I say each word as I pound in another nail. I take the glass of water.

“When you get this, whatever this is, out of your system, there’s a young lady across the street that’s hurting too.” She looks at me all sad.

“When I get done with the barn.” I call over my shoulder as I hammer another nail. Sweat is dripping down my face and back so I take off my shirt and wipe my face with it.

“No one is perfect, Cash, and you can’t hold out thinking there might be someone else out there who is. You’ve got to focus on becoming the right man, no matter, if it’s Bailey or someone you meet tomorrow. You know we all make mistakes, and it takes a strong heart, Cash, to continue to love someone that hurts you. It takes a bigger even stronger heart to forgive and let things go. Forgiving is a gift you give yourself. It won’t change what happened, but it can shape the future. Think about that while you’re beating those poor planks to death.” She turns to go back in the house.

She always does this shit to me, gives me some mumbo gumbo then leaves. One of the things I learned from how my dad did things is to let go of things that you can’t change. There will be bad days in my life, but with bad days, you keep fighting until you come out on the other side. Those days, on the other side, will be the best days of your life. I wonder if that is why mom kept fighting through all the shit she endured during all of those years. She knew the best days were ahead of her. Mom is a smart lady. She got me thinking in the right direction. I love that woman. She has always been my rock, even when she needed one to hold onto herself.

I put Bailey up on some kind of pedestal and thought she was perfect and ideal. That we would always have the perfect relationship. That we were invincible. Good thing we are going through this now and not after we are married.

I’m wasting my time being angry and hurt out here. The sooner I work things out with her, the quicker I will be happy again. I pick up my shirt, and go get a shower. I can work out the rest of this shit in there.