Authors: Delia Delaney
She skipped off to join Abigail and her parents, so I waved at them to acknowledge that I knew Maggie was leaving.
My sister glanced my way as I grabbed my stuff, and she just waved as well. I guess she
was
busy enough, so I didn’t bother her
with formal goodbyes
.
“You have plans for the rest of the day?” Zack asked me. “You are now childless.”
I scrambled for something to say, an excuse I guess, but nothing came to me. I wasn’t very good at lying, but I was okay with letting him think that Maggie was my
kid
. I felt safer that way. I really was awkward when it came to guys and dating, but jeez, now I’d resorted to using my four-year-old niece as an excuse?
“I don’t really have anything set in stone,” I finally replied. “But I do have some things I need to get done at home while I have the chance.”
He didn’t respond to my lame excuse, but we’d made it all the way to my car again, and it was his turn in the conversation. He didn’t say anything though, and I didn’t have anything to put away that time to busy myself with—I was just holding a Twinkie in my hand.
However,
something did catch my thoughts, and I looked around the parking lot for a few seconds.
“Uh, you waiting for someone?” he asked, following my gaze.
“Oh. Um, don’t you have a little soccer player you’re here watching?”
He paused for a second and then smiled. Then he scanned the parking lot for a moment until he stopped at a minivan. “Yep, right there,” he pointed.
I followed his
gesture
and
took a second to look the little girl over
, the same girl I saw leave with him before
. She was pretty cute, with
dark
hair just like Zack’s. S
he was with an older
couple, and I had to assume they were
grandparents.
“Isn’t that the little girl that tried to throw a punch
in our game
?” I joked.
He laughed. “Actually that could be Ashlyn. She’s kind of feisty.”
“And you let her get away with such antics?”
I smiled.
“What can I do,” he shrugged. “I can’t really hit her back. Maybe in a few years, when she’s older.”
I stared at him with disbelief. He was joking, right?
“What, you don’t have any siblings?” he asked, realizing I was sort of appalled.
“Siblings?”
“Uh, yeah, you know, brothers or sisters?”
“Um,
yes
, I have an older sister and a younger brother…” I finally understood what he meant and I said, “She’s your
sister
?”
It was said in such a way that I thought he’d be offended, but he just smiled and replied, “Yeah, she is.”
“I’m sorry, that was really rude of me. I didn’t mean to imply that it was weird or anything— I mean yeah I thought she was your daughter but— What I mean is that having such an age difference isn’t uncommon or anything, I just—”
I stopped, feeling like I should just shut up.
What was I even babbling about? Okay, so I realized that he wasn’t really a dad, and that kind of threw me off course. Before, he really was just a soccer dad that I was chatting with, but now…
“My mom died when I was
fifteen
,” he
informed me
. “My dad ended up remarrying fiv
e years later, and he and Mariah
had Ashlyn together. I have two older brothers too, but yeah…there’s a twenty year gap
between me and my sister
,” he smiled.
I slowly nodded, glad for the clarification, but not expecting it.
“Families can be interesting,” I stated. “My little brother is thirteen. I thought that was kind of a big gap growing up, but wow…twenty. What was that like?”
“It was weird,” he admitted. “I mean my dad is
twelve
years older than
my step-mom
, and she hadn’t been married or had kids yet, so I guess it was kind of their agreement. My dad wasn’t so sure at first, but he does pretty good for an old guy.”
I lightly laughed. “What about your other brother? Jason isn’t the oldest, right?”
“No, he’s
a year
older than me. He’s twenty-
six
. And my other brother, Chad,
is
twenty-
eight
. He’s not married, but he does have a
two
-year-old
boy with his girlfriend.”
I nodded, wondering if it would be odd to have a daughter close to the age of
your
grandkids.
Zack looked anxious again, kind of like he wanted to talk about that date
some more
. I could read it loud and clear, and now I was more insecure than ever. Now he was a regular guy trying to ask me out, and I didn’t want to admit that I was interested.
But I did have the wedding as my justification to say no. I wanted to keep my personal life and my professional life separate, so before he could make it awkward again, I said, “Well, I need to get going. I’ve got…a long list of things to do and…need to make sure everything is ready for tomorrow and…”
I could tell he knew I
was making excuses, or worse
,
assumed I
had no interest in going out with him.
That made me fee
l
bad, if he really thought that,
because it wasn’t true.
“Okay, s
ure,” he nodded. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Taryn.”
I watched him leave, feeling torn between letting it be and apo
logizing for my fear of dating as
he made it to his Jeep in the next row. But before he got in he saw me staring at him, and the smile he gave sent a mix of emotions through me.
I was no longer excited for the wedding the next day. I got there at
two in the after
noon,
dreading the fact that I was going to see Zack again. Why did guys have to complicate things at the worst times?
He was starting to make me nervous, and I was going into battle mode.
I was getting my equipment together when he approached me and said,
“
I’m saving a dance for the photographer.”
“I’ll be busy working,” I replied, not even looking up.
“But I got permission from the bride,” he seemed to gloat.
I looked right at him and almost panicked. “No, you did not,” I basically threatened.
“I sure did. Apparently I need all the help I can get, because after six weeks of this, I’m still having no luck.”
“Six weeks,” I scoffed. “
What are you even talking about?
I met you, like, three weeks ago or something.”
“Ah, but I noticed you three weeks
before
that. It just took a while to strike up the nerve.”
I’ll admit I was a little flattered, but why was he doing this to me now?
Here I was to do a job
and he was totally flustering me before I even started.
“You look beautiful, by the way,
”
he had to say.
I politely replied, “Thank you. You look very nice as well.”
“Thank you. So… If you can’t dance with me tonight, then I guess I’ll take a rain check.”
“I’m already seeing someone,” I lied.
It was instant, my panic causing me to blurt out such a lame untruth.
He raised his eyebrows,
obviously
surprised.
“Oh yeah? What’s his name?”
I barel
y paused while I wiped my
lense
clean. “Um,
Jared
.”
He seemed to think about
that
for just a second. “Hmm, since yesterday? You should have mentioned him when you were stumbling for an excuse
then
.”
I was irritated because he called me on my
fib
, but I chose to stick with it. “Well things moved quickly.”
He chuckled. “Yeah, I guess so.”
There was
an
awkward silence, so I began assembling my tri-pod to keep me busy.
“
Jared
, huh?” he finally said. “
Jared
versus Zack
.
I think I can handle that.
”
It made me smile, but I still scrambled for another excuse. “You know I have Maggie, right?” I threw into the mix. I knew it was totally dishonest, even though I didn’t literally say she was my own kid. But the implication was still there and I used it to my advantage.
“Right,” he replied, eyeing me a little funny. “And what does that mean exactly?”
“Uh… It means that I’m unavailable.”
He barely nodded, seeming to think it over, but not seeming to really accept the fact that I
was turning him down. However, he finally said, “Taryn, I’m asking you out on a date. You can just say no if you want.”
“Um,
then
no thank you,” I replied
.
“See, that wasn’t so hard, was it?”
“Nope, it was
all right
.”
He lightly laughed
, but I wasn’t sure if I’d wounded his ego or not
. I felt k
ind of bad, I really did, but
I guess I was playing
a defensive game, just in case.
I
wished he would leave
,
so I
made him feel like he was in my way when I needed to get around him. He moved, but just watched me assemble another camera.
I needed to stop letting my inner bitch slip out just because I was uncomfortable.
“So…
I guess I’ll just not smile in any of the pictures then,” he said.
I
wanted
to laugh
, because it was a funny threat, but I only shrugged.
“
And…
I might throw in a
scowl
or two,
”
he added.
“That’s your
choice
.”
“And probably a set of crossed eyes.”
I had to smile at that but my back was turned to him and he couldn’t see.
“There’s always the bunny ears over my brother’s head, or an occasional middle finger…”
Okay
,
a tiny chuckle escaped, but I kept my back to him.
“Or I could just undress you with my eyes in every shot,” he had to say.
That made me lose my composure and I let out a frustrated laugh with an, “Oh my gosh.”
“Ah, see? That’s it. That’s the ticket. Prepare to be undressed all night long.”
“Would you stop it?” I asked with a
frustrated
smile. “Grow up.”
He laughed with a shrug, but
once I moved away from him to set up my camera
for the tri-pod
,
he did leave after that.
I was totally rattled
,
and
also
mad
at
myself.
I had to shake it off though. This was someone’s very important day and there was no way I was going to
ruin it
.
I
strapped
on a very professional mood and went right to work. But of course the first set of formal pictures were of all the g
roomsmen, which included Zack. I thought about trying
other photos
first, but
I had a
process, and I wasn’t going to let my attraction to him deter me from it.
But would you believe that every picture I took of the guys in the wedding party contained a smug smile that seemed directed right at me? I would look through the lens at each face and there was Zack, asking me out again.
Oh wait,
undressing
me. And I kid you not that I truly felt naked by the end of the day. I had to endure pre-ceremony pictures, ceremony pictures, and an entire
three
-hour reception. I wasn’t exhausted from work that day; I was exhausted from Zack’s silent conversations with me. He didn’t
say a word
to me that entire time, but he didn’t have to.
Melissa was the one that approached me towards the end of the night. She told me I should take a few minutes to eat and maybe join in on a dance or two.
“Um, I don’t eat at the weddings
when I’m working
,” I told her. “Nor do I dance at them
.”