Loving a Lawman (12 page)

“Well, I guess I should be getting back.” Millie held up her sack with the receipt stapled on the outside. “Have a good afternoon.”

“Yeah,” Jessie murmured. “You too.”

She watched as Millie walked away, wondering if she'd been better off taking her chances with Shirley.

*   *   *

S
eth.”

He took his feet off his desk and sat up straight as Millie came rushing into the jailhouse. “What's wrong?”

She looked from him to Dusty, then over to the holding cells. Johnson Jones hadn't managed to wake up yet and find his way home even though it was after two o'clock in the afternoon. She slid into Dusty's chair and rolled close, her knees bumping Seth's as she swung near. “I just saw Jessie at the drugstore.”

He nodded coolly even though his heart gave a hard pound. “Did she look okay?” He'd been doing his best to give her some time. He called nearly every day to check on her and made sure that on her off days, either his mother or his grandmother paid her a visit. He wanted to have her at his side, but he knew that her goal was to leave Cattle Creek. As much as the thought saddened him, he knew he couldn't make her stay.

“You could say that.”

“Quit talking in riddles, Millie,” Dusty groused. Though Seth thought he was more upset about her sitting in his chair than her manner of speech.

Millie glanced over to Jones, then eased in a bit closer. “She was buying a pregnancy test.”

“You don't say.” Dusty took off his hat and slapped it against one thigh.

“It didn't take you long to get back into the swing of small-town life.” Seth said the words even as his heart jumped into his throat. A pregnancy test? But that would mean . . .

“Is that all you have to say?” Millie asked.

“She told me she was on the pill,” he whispered.

But she hadn't. Jessie never said those four little words. Just dodged the issue. And he had let her.

Millie shot him a gentle smile. “So was I.”

He looked from one of them to the other, realizing in that moment that they both knew he was responsible.

A pregnancy test!

The words sank in. “Jessie's pregnant?” He was on his feet in an instant. “I need to get over there and—”

Millie's hand on his arm stopped him in his tracks. “Hold on, cowboy. First of all, you don't know that she's having a baby, only that she bought a test.”

“But—” If she bought a test, she had to suspect she was pregnant. And if she was pregnant . . .

“There are a number of things that can cause a woman to miss her cycle.” She rolled her eyes. “Gawd, I can't believe that I'm talking to you about this.” She shook her head and continued. “Just look at all the stress she's been under. That alone would be enough to throw her off schedule. And second of all, you wouldn't be so careless as to not use protection . . .” She stopped and turned questioning eyes to him.

He cleared his throat, a surer sign of his guilt he couldn't imagine, unless it was the heat he felt rising up to his hairline.

“She'll tell you when she's ready,” Millie quietly continued. “If you go over there now, like this—” She waved a hand in front of him. He was poised for flight, every muscle in his body tense and ready to move. His jaw was clenched, his fists tight. “You're only going to make it worse.”

“But—” He turned to Dusty for help, but his chief deputy only shrugged.

Millie placed one hand on his chest and gave a little shove. Seth fell back into his seat. “Give her some time,” she suggested. “A week, maybe two.”

“She's got three days.”

“Seth,” Millie started in protest.

“Three days,” he repeated. That was plenty enough time to take the test and come tell him what she had found out.
And plenty enough time for him to go out of his mind wondering if he was about to be a dad.

*   *   *

I
t was the longest three days of his life. Aside from the fact that he had to be patient, Jessie had stopped taking his calls. She didn't have a cell phone, so he had left messages at the house, but not once had she picked up or returned his call.

“I'm going over there.” Seth crammed his hat on his head and started for the door.

“You could at least wait until she gets off work,” Millie said. She had her back to him as she filed papers and cleaned through the mess of a system he had devised when Nancy went on leave.

He checked his watch, as if he hadn't already done that twenty or so times today. Jessie didn't get off work for another half an hour and he didn't think he could wait until then.

“Seth.” Millie's voice was ripe with caution.

“I'm going over there,” he said again, and pushed his way out of the station before she could convince him to wait. Or physically make him.

The heat greeted him like a slap in the face, the rain from two weeks ago a distant memory now. He waited for two cars to pass, then crossed the street to the Chuck Wagon.

“Hey, Sheriff,” Sheridan said as he walked through the door.

“Where's Jessie?” he asked, then caught himself. “I mean, hi, Sheridan. Is Jessie around?”

The fortysomething blonde shook her head. “Chuck let her go home early.”

Worry filled him. “Was she feeling okay?”

“I think so. She said something about an appointment at the bank.”

“Right.” He gave a nod. “What time did she leave?”

“About an hour ago.”

Which would give her plenty of time to take care of her appointment and get back home.

“Can I get you something to eat?” she asked.

“Nah, thanks anyway.” He tipped his hat and headed out into the sunshine.

Seth loped back across the street and popped into the office long enough to grab the keys to his service vehicle and tell Millie and Dusty that he'd be out for the rest of the afternoon. Then he started toward Jessie's house.

Damn, it was hot. He turned the air up a notch and thought about Jessie walking home in this heat. And pregnant. Possibly pregnant, he corrected. But somehow he knew. The question was if she bought the test three days ago, then why hadn't she been by to tell him the good news?

There were only two possible answers. One, she didn't think it was good news and had no intention of telling him. Or two, there was no news to tell. But he knew that wasn't the case. She should have talked to him by now.

His anger mounting by the second, he pulled the truck to a stop and got out. The house looked the same as it always did, run-down and sad. But Jessie was never going to fix it up. She was leaving town.

Leaving without telling him that she was having his baby.

Steam fairly billowed out his ears as he took the porch steps two at a time and knocked on the door with more force than necessary. “Jessie,” he hollered, propping his hands on his hips. “I know you're in there.”

He raised his fist again but didn't connect with wood.

Jessie wrenched the door open, her expression as annoyed as he felt. “What's wrong with you?”

He pushed past her into the house and took a deep breath to control his emotions. She was pregnant. He had to remember that. Feeling marginally in control, he rounded on her. “When were you going to tell me?”

She shook her head. “Tell you what?”

“About the baby.”

She blanched. “How did you know?”

“Millie.”

“Of course.” Jessie eased down onto the hard-backed chair next to the front door. “I don't know,” she finally said.

Seth resisted the urge to scoop her into his arms and kiss away all that hurt and confusion. It was better by far if he stayed angry, at least for now. “You don't know when you were going to tell me?”

She shook her head. “I chickened out.”

“What?”

“I didn't take the test,” she said, louder this time. “I got nervous and couldn't go through with it.”

“Where is it now?” he asked.

“In the bathroom.”

He gave a quick nod and hauled her to her feet. “Let's go.”

“Go where?”

“To the bathroom. It's time to find out if we're going to be parents.”

*   *   *

D
umbfounded, Jessie allowed him to lead her through the house. He pushed his way into the small powder room that she used. The incriminating box was sitting on the counter, the test nestled inside, just waiting to show her how stupid and irresponsible she had been.

Seth picked up the box and handed it to her. She snatched it away from him, her fingers trembling so bad she couldn't get the darn thing open.

“Give it.” Seth took it from her, but she noticed his fingers were shaking even more than hers. Finally he ripped open the box and the bag inside. “Here.” He handed her the wand and started reading the instructions. “You need to, uh . . . pee on that and we wait two minutes to see if a pink line appears.” He looked up and pinned her to the spot. “Well?”

“I hope you don't think I'm going to pee with you in here.”

“Jessie, I—”

“Out.” She planted her hands on his back and somehow managed to get him on the other side of the bathroom door. With a decisive click, she turned the lock and caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror above the sink. Once she took the test, there was no going back. And once she found out the truth, then everything would change.

Blowing her hair out of her face, she told herself to quit stalling.

She jumped as Seth knocked on the door. “You okay in there?”

“Fine.” At least the anger had leached from his voice.

With a sigh she moved to the toilet to take care of business.

“Are you finished? I heard the toilet flush.”

“Almost.” It hadn't been the easiest thing, peeing with Seth just outside the door, but she'd managed. Now the last thing she wanted was him standing over her while she waited for the results.
They
waited for the results. Like it or not, they were in this together. At least until she outlined her plans for him.

“Almost, hell. Open the door, Jess.”

She glanced into the wand's little plastic window. It hadn't been thirty seconds and already the line was visible. Maybe Seth read the directions wrong. She opened the door and Seth barreled inside.

“Are you sure a pink line means a baby?” She swallowed hard.

“It's positive, isn't it?” He looked over to the wand and paled under his tan.

One thing was certain, nothing would ever be the same again.

A
baby,” he whispered, picking up the little plastic device and staring at it as if it contained all the mysteries in the world.

She supposed that in a way it did.

“Nothing has to change for you, Seth.”

“I don't see how.”

“This baby—” Dear God, she was having a baby. The thought sent a shiver through her. She was excited and filled with dread at the same time. A baby to love and cherish.

“I'm not going to have such an important discussion in the bathroom.” He took her by the hand and dragged her into the living room. “We have some plans to make.”

Jessie shook her head. “I've made my plans. I'm leaving Cattle Creek.”

“Where are you going?” Seth asked. His expression gave nothing away.

She had been planning to escape for so long, yet she still didn't have the answer to that one. She was still dealing too much with her grandmother's death to focus on her dreams.
She hadn't been able to leave Cattle Creek when Naomi was alive. Now that she was gone, Jessie was having a hard time not feeling a little bit guilty, as if she had caused her grandmother's death by her own dreams. It was dumb, but the feelings were there all the same. She shrugged but didn't meet his gaze. “I'll let you know where I decide to go.”

“You'll let me know.” The words were lethal.

“Yes.” Her breath stuttered in her lungs, but she managed to continue. “I'll contact an attorney, and he can draw up the papers.”

“Papers?”

“You know, papers.” She gave what she hoped was an encouraging nod.

Seth's eyes blazed green fire. “Are you asking me to sign away my rights as a father?”

“Be reasonable, Seth. This isn't what you want.”

“How do you know what I want? Did you ever think about asking me?”

“Once I get settled, I'll contact an attorney. He can handle it all. I don't want to keep the baby from you.”

“Damn right, you won't.” His nostrils flared as his breath heaved in and out of his chest.

“But you don't owe me anything.” It wasn't as if Seth was in love with her. Marriage was out of the question. She saw no need to bind them together that way. Just like her mama before her, she would raise the baby on her own. She might not have a college education or many job skills, but she had her camera. Maybe she could work for a photographer until she could open a studio of her own. She would do what she had to do to take care of her child.

She'd lost every blood relative she ever had. This baby was her future, her family, and she didn't want to share her with anyone.

“So you've got it all figured out.”

“It's better this way.” Now more than ever, she had to go. Having the baby here, in Cattle Creek, would totally
upset the dynamics of the family. Once word got out, there wouldn't be a Langston who would look at her the same again. And that was something she couldn't stomach.

“Better for who, Jessie?”

*   *   *

H
e watched the emotions and answers flash across her face.

“I want a fresh start in a new place. And I surely don't want to raise my child in Cattle Creek where no one will ever forget that I got knocked up by Seth Langston.”

“Well, too bad, because you did get knocked up by Seth Langston and now you're going to marry him.” He didn't know why he was yelling. Well, maybe he did.

“I'm not marrying you.”

“What did you expect, Jessie? That you wouldn't tell me and just move away and take the baby?
My
baby.” Despite his anger his heart lurched at the thought of his child.

“I told you.”

“Big of you.” He braced his hands on his hips.

She opened her mouth to say something, but he never knew what.

“Just what were you planning on doing, Jess? What are you going to tell him when he asks about his father?”

“
She'll
be fine without a father.”

“Just like you.”

“That was mean.”

It was, but he didn't care. He felt mean. Mean and ill and hateful and happy and nauseous all at the same time. “Make no mistake, Jessie. I will be a part of this child's life, whether you want me to or not.”

She tucked her chin to her chest and put her hands over her ears. “It's not like that,” she whispered.

“Like what?” he demanded, though he had lowered his voice to be a better match to hers.

“It's not that I don't want you to be a part of the baby's life. I don't want you to feel like you have to be. We're not in love or anything. What kind of life is that?”

The heartbreak in her words was his undoing. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. Lord, he could get used to the feel of her in his arms, soft and pliant. How would she feel in a few months when she was round and showing? The thought filled him with excitement. “We may not be in love, Jessie.” At least she wasn't. “But we can be good together. We'll make a fine home for a baby. I know it.” He kissed the top of her head even as her tears wet the front of his shirt. Her arms came around him and he nearly groaned out loud from the feel of her innocent touch.

All he needed was a little time and he could show her what love was about. They had known each other for a lifetime, had practically grown up together.

“What about Chase?” She had to ask the one question that he wouldn't allow himself to even think.

“This has nothing to do with Chase. This is about you and me. And our baby.”

She took a deep shuddering breath, as if pulling herself back in control.

“If you don't agree, I'm going to get Grandma Esther and you know what will happen then.”

Jessie laughed and took a step back, wiping her tears away with the backs of her hands. “Just give me a little time to absorb all this, okay?”

“I'm not giving up until you say yes.”

Her smile wavered just a bit. “I expected nothing less.”

*   *   *

S
eth's footfalls
thunked
against the slate porch as he climbed the steps leading to the big house. He had been putting this moment off for three days, but it could wait no longer. He let himself into the house. “Mama?” he called, taking his hat off as he stepped into the large family
room. His whole apartment would fit into the one room, but with the wooden beams, hardwood floors, and leather furniture, the space projected a cozy air.

The large painting above the fireplace caught his attention. His mother had had it commissioned from a photograph taken of Chase a few years back. He was on a bucking bull and was wearing chaps that depicted the Texas state flag. One hand was wrapped in his rope, the other high in the air. It was a beautiful painting, but today it was the last thing he wanted to see.

“I thought I heard you call.” The heels of his mother's boots clicked against the hardwood floors as she stepped out of her office. She leaned in and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “What brings you out today?”

He glanced from the portrait of Chase back to his mother. “I need to talk to you about something. Is Jake around?”

“He took Wesley out to ride fences.” She shook her head. “That girl. I'll never make a lady out of her the way he lets her run wild. Come on in here and have a seat.” She led the way back into her office.

Seth collapsed into the horseshoe-shaped leather chair in front of her desk and waited for her to take a seat behind it.

“What's on your mind today?” she asked, once she had settled into her chair.

Seth crossed his legs, ankle over knee, and tapped his fingers against the heel of one boot. Suddenly he was sixteen again and having to fess up to the biggest mistake of his life. “Jessie's pregnant.”

He watched the emotions flit across his mother's face—surprise, understanding, then resignation. “I see.” She sat back in her chair, her demeanor calm and collected, but he knew inside her head the thoughts were going ninety to nothing. “What do you propose to do?”

“I'm going to marry her.”

She seemed to mull it over, then shook her head. “That's
very noble of you, Seth. But I don't think it's your place. Obviously we need to talk to Chase. Does he know?”

“I need to call and talk to him, but . . .” He trailed off. He needed plans in place before he told the news to his baby brother.

She reached for the phone sitting to her left. “We need to call him,” she said, pressing buttons as she spoke. “He needs to get back here and take care of his responsibility.”

“It's mine.”

She couldn't hide her shock. Her eyes wide, she stopped mid-dial and returned the phone to its cradle. “I see.”

He stood, unable to bear the confusion on her face.

Naturally she thought the baby was Chase's. After all, Jessie had been Chase's girl from day one. Or at least that was what everybody in town thought.

Now his mother knew that Seth had slept with his brother's girl. Not only had he breached the brotherly trust issue, but he did it with a lasting, living, breathing memory.

“Are you sure?” she asked.

“I am.”

She gave a thoughtful nod. “And your plans are?”

“I'm going to marry her.”

“I see.” His mother stood as well. “I guess we have a wedding to plan.”

Seth shook his head. “We'll just have a quick civil service. Maybe drive over to San Angelo.” That would stop the wagging tongues for a while, but soon enough, word would get out that he and Jessie were having a baby.

“Unacceptable,” his mother said. “You need to do it right, son. Langstons only get married once.”

*   *   *

S
eth pulled his service truck to a stop and then leaned over to open the passenger-side door. “Get in.”

Jessie warily eyed him. He hated when she gave him that look—part frightened deer, part stubborn mule. “Why?”

“We have a few things to talk about.”

She glanced down the sidewalk toward the turn off to Larkspur Lane, then back to him.

She was on her way home from the Chuck Wagon. He had tried to make it over there before she got off work, but Chester Gibson decided that Amos Carver had stolen all the coolant from his air conditioner and had called Seth. After calling in a repairman and taking a quick look at service records, Seth figured it was time to fill the thing up again. Without apology to his neighbor, Chester paid the repairman and Seth was free to go. But now he was chasing Jessie down the streets of Cattle Creek instead of picking her up from work as had been his original plan.

“What if I don't want to talk?” She sounded plumb wore-out, but some things couldn't wait until she was ready.

“Get in, Jessie James.”

She flounced over to his truck and slid into the cab next to him. “Fine,” she said. “But don't call me that.”

He didn't say a word as he started the truck down the road once again.

“I thought you were taking me home,” she said as they passed by the turnoff to her house.

Seth shook his head. “I thought we might go down to the lake.”

“Are you going with me to watch the fireworks tonight?”

“Are you asking?”

“Maybe.”

“We have a lot we need to talk about.”

“Fine.” She crossed her arms and slumped back into her seat.

She rode that way the entire short trip to the ranch.

“This isn't the lake,” she said as he stopped the truck at the entrance to the horse pasture.

“There's a lake here.”

She nodded.

They had all been fishing down here too many times
to count. He knew it as well as he knew the big lake on the other side of the highway. But that lake would be filled with teenagers and families alike, trying their best to enjoy the summer break from school. Add in the fact that it was the Fourth of July and everyone in Page County would be splashing around in water. He needed to be alone with her, have some peace and quiet. Someplace where they could talk and get things worked out before they got married.

She slid from the cab without him asking and opened the gate. He drove through and she shut it behind him before swinging back into the truck once more.

He had already instructed Millie and Dusty to handle everything they could until he texted them to say that he was available again. He needed no distractions. This was too important to have to deal with petty crimes and high school pranks. Dusty was plenty capable, and Seth had more important fish to fry. But he'd said an added prayer that the town's good nature would last at least long enough for him to straighten out a few things with Jessie.

He pulled the truck to a stop under the shade of a large oak. Family legend stated that it had been planted by William Travis himself, but Seth suspected that it had been William Langston, his great-grandfather, who had done the deed.

He got out of the truck, then looked over to his sullen passenger. “It's too hot to sit in the truck all afternoon.”