Malcolm (Book 1, The Redemption Series) (17 page)

“Please follow us to an approved landing area,” a computer generated female voice says to us inside the pod.

“I'm going to try to lose them,” Malcolm tells me. “The ride from here on out might be a little bumpy.”

I watch as Malcolm increases our speed and begins to maneuver us in an attempt to lose the drones. He tries his best but the drones are just as quick in their adjustments to speed and altitude as Malcolm is.

“Damn it!” Malcolm says, becoming frustrated. “All right, hold on. We're going to have to make a crash landing in the ocean and use the autodestruct to destroy the drones before they can report where we are.”

“I don't like the water,” I say.

Malcolm looks over at me in surprise.

“Then I suppose you can't swim?” he asks, like he already knows the answer to his own question.

I shake my head. “No, I can't.”

Malcolm does something to the controls and then stands up. He turns my protective shield off and lifts me out of my chair.

“You're so drugged,” he says, “I doubt you could swim even if you knew how anyway.”

He holds me against his chest and reaches around to the back of my dress to open the closure there. I hear fabric tear as he rips the back of the skirt in two. He sits me back down and completely removes the wedding gown from me leaving me in only my undergarments.

“Why did you just do that?” I ask.

“The dress is too big,” he answers, “It would have just weighed you like an anchor and sent you directly to the bottom of the ocean.”

Malcolm picks me up in his arms and cradles me to him much like he did the first night he came to my rescue.

“Open hatch,” Malcolm says and the pod door opens.

Cold wind rushes into the interior of the pod, but Malcolm keeps his hold on me with his feet firmly planted. I can see the watery surface of the ocean beneath us rapidly approaching.

“I've got you,” he says, looking down at me. “I won't let you go, Anna.”

I hope his words hold a double meaning because it's not the water that I'm afraid of.

I'm more afraid of losing him to the ghost of Lilly.

Just as the pod is about to crash land in the ocean, Malcolm yells, “Auto-destruct 5 seconds!”

Malcolm jumps out holding me securely to him. As we hit the water, I instantly feel chilled to the bone from its coldness. It's a cold I’ve never felt before and hope to never feel again. I'm faintly aware of the pod exploding but just too drugged and cold to care much about its destruction.

I’ve always hated the water. My father tried to teach me how to swim when I was young, but I didn’t like getting in the pool. I didn’t like the feeling of not being in complete control. There wasn’t anything solid for me to hold onto, and I felt like I was at the mercy of a substance that didn’t seem very reliable and could easily kill me.

Malcolm slips his left arm underneath my breast and begins to swim while pulling me with him through the water. The swim to shore seems to take forever, but eventually my body becomes completely numb to the cold, and I feel myself begin to drift off to sleep.

“Don’t go to sleep, Anna,” Malcolm orders.

“Tired,” I say as my eyelids droop. The sweet release of sleep beckons me to accept her embrace and just let go. Let go of the pain. Let go of the nightmare my life has turned into. Let go of the heartache Malcolm’s caused me because of his lingering feelings for someone who died long ago.

“Stay with me,” Malcolm begs.

“Why?” I ask, seeing no reason good enough to stay.

Malcolm doesn’t answer right away, but finally he says, “Because I need you. Don’t leave me, Anna.”

That…was a good enough reason…

By sheer will-power alone, I keep my eyes open and force myself to concentrate on the moon hanging in the sky above us, our only source of light. I use every bit of energy I have left to keep myself awake as Malcolm swims us to shore.

Once we reach the sandy soil, Malcolm picks me up in his arms and cradles me to his warm chest. He runs to a stand of trees to help block out the wind battering the shoreline with its winter breath. When we reach the shelter of the forest, Malcolm gently sits me against the trunk of one of the trees and begins to hastily pull off his wet clothes.

I don’t mind the private striptease Malcolm is giving me. In fact, I’m rather enjoying it, but I can’t imagine why he’s taking all his clothes off. I notice a series of black scars on his right calf and have to assume the injuries are what causes him to limp sometimes. Malcolm soon comes back and sits down beside me only wearing a pair of tight white underwear. He pulls me onto his lap and cradles me in the safety of his arms. I’m shivering so violently by this time I begin to wonder if I’ll end up breaking one of my own bones or hurt Malcolm.

“Anna,” Malcolm whispers in my ear, his warm breath melting my heart, “concentrate on my voice. Stop thinking about how cold you are and just listen to me.”

I nod my head because my teeth are chattering so hard I can’t actually speak.

“I never would have let Levi touch you,” he tells me vehemently. “And I sure as hell wouldn’t have let him have a child with you. Do you understand that? I wouldn’t have made that deal with him.”

I want to believe Malcolm's words, but I was witness to his hesitation. I knew he believed the words he was telling me because if it had been a lie I would have been able to see through it clearly. If I was able to speak, I would have asked him if, in that moment with Levi, he had considered the proposal seriously for even just a second. Was it his heart or his mind which had made the final decision?

I lean completely against Malcolm's warmth as my shivers subside. But, even with his added heat, my core feels so cold I'm not sure I'll ever regain my own body’s warmth. I'm so tired, and I feel alone even though Malcolm is holding me and rocking me for comfort. Unable to keep my eyes open for a second longer, I fall asleep and faintly hear Malcolm yell for me to stay awake. But, not even his desperate pleas are enough to stop me from free falling into death.

CHAPTER fourteen

I feel a warm breath fill my lungs to bursting and faintly taste something sweet against my tongue but can't quite place the flavor. I take in a deep, shuddering breath of my own and open my eyes to find an angel of mercy hovering over me. He's glowing just like most of the other angels I've met, and his sweet blue eyes hold an ancient quality I've never seen in anyone before. His tousled blond hair hangs down over his forehead as he peers down at me.

“Hello, Anna,” he says. “My name is Will.”

I lift a hand to his face and cup the side of it, strangely feeling as though I'm in the presence of a dear friend. There's a connection between us that is so familiar, yet so strange. It's almost a mirror of the way I feel about Auggie. I instinctively know that he just saved my life. I just don't know how exactly.

Will closes his eyes at my tender caress, and I know he feels the same way I do.

“Thank you,” I tell him.

Will opens his eyes and smiles down at me.

“You're welcome,” he replies.

“Will…what are you?” I ask.

“One of the people who hopes to help you make it through all of this,” he tells me.

“Was I...” I have to swallow hard before I can finish my question. “Was I dead?”

“For a little while,” Will tells me.

“Then how...” I don't even know how to ask what I want to know.

Will smiles.

“How did I bring you back to life?” he asks.

I nod my head.

“Protecting Caylin and Aiden's descendants is a job I was given a long time ago. To put it mildly, you girls have been high maintenance.”

“So, if we die, you bring us back to life?”

“Yes.”

I feel my brow crinkle as I consider this fact because one thing makes absolutely no sense if what he is saying is true.

“Then why did you let my mother die?” I have to ask.

Will's face drops with a mixture of guilt and sadness.

“I couldn't save Amalie,” he tells me.

“Why?”

“Because you had been born,” he replies gently, like he hopes this news won't upset me. “My protection automatically transfers to the next descendant. It's the way things have always worked.”

“Then my birth caused her death in more ways than one,” I say as I look up at him through a blur of tears, feeling the heaviness of my guilt over my mother's death crash into me all over again.

“No,” he tells me in no uncertain terms, “you did
not
kill your mother. It was simply her time to leave this world. Amalie knew what she was doing. She loved you so much she willingly gave up her life for you. You were everything to her. So, don't ever think you killed your mother because that's not what happened. The best parts of her are still alive within you.”

“If I hadn't been born she would still be alive,” I try to argue.

“Or the line of your family would have ended with Amalie,” Will argues back. “You have no way of knowing what might have happened. None of us do. So, stop blaming yourself, Anna. Life is never certain. Every decision, every turn in the road, will lead you down a different path. All you can do is be satisfied with where you end up.”

I try to take Will's words to heart, but I've carried the guilt of my mother’s death with me since I was old enough to understand what happened. It won't just vanish with a few kind words.

As I continue to look up at Will, I still have this strange sense of déjà vu.

“Have we met before?” I ask him. “There's something about you that's so familiar to me. I feel like I know you.”

Will’s smile broadens. “Yes, we met in Heaven before you were sent to Earth. We were actually playmates while you were there.”

“Playmates... in Heaven?” I ask, finding the concept strange. “Like we used to play chase and hide-n-go seek with one another? I didn't realize I even existed before I was born.”

“Some souls aren't allowed to stay in Heaven for very long. But, yours was. We were friends in Heaven for what would be many years here on Earth. God allowed someone very special by the name of Utha Mae to keep you before you were sent here. He gave me the privilege of being your best friend while you were living with her and her husband. He didn't want you to be lonely so he let me be your playmate.”

“Don't take this the wrong way, but you seem kind of old to be a playmate.”

Will chuckles. “In Heaven, you can assume any of your previous forms that you want. I looked eight-years-old when you and I first became friends there.”

“I don't remember that,” I confess. “Yet, something inside me seems to remember you.”

I try to sit up and Will helps me accomplish what should have been a simple task. I look around and see that we're inside an old house with furniture that looks like it's about to fall apart. I hear a rattle by the sliding glass doors which face towards the sea and watch as Malcolm opens them to step inside. A gust of cold wind follows him in, and I hug the blanket I’m lying underneath closer to my chin to block its chill. His arms are filled with short logs of wood. He slams the door shut behind him and turns to look at me.

I see him visibly take in a steadying breath when he sees that I’m awake.

“How are you feeling?” Malcolm asks, dropping the logs in his arms onto the floor before walking over to me.

“Better,” I tell him, realizing the coldness I felt before is gone now and my thoughts are a lot clearer.

Malcolm holds a hand out to Will. Will stands and shakes it.

“Thanks for coming. I was worried you wouldn’t for a moment there,” Malcolm says.

“There was no need to worry, Malcolm. I've been waiting for her to be born for as long as you have. Time might move differently in Heaven, but some things still seem to take forever to happen.”

“Did father send any instructions for us?”

Will shakes his head. “No, He didn't send a message. And before you ask, no one else sent a message either.”

Malcolm nods that he understands but doesn't look too happy about what Will said. I have a feeling Malcolm was hoping for a message from Lilly. It just deepens the mystery surrounding her hold over him, even in death.

“I need to get back,” Will says, looking down at me once again. He holds one of his hands down to help me to my feet.

Once I'm standing, I wrap the thin blanket around my body because I'm still only wearing my underwear.

“Am I ever going to see you again?” I ask, hoping this won't be the last time I see Will.

Will smiles crookedly. “Let's both hope you don't need me to come down again for a long time. I'm only allowed to travel between Heaven and Earth when you need to be brought back to life. I love seeing you, but I would much rather just have you stay alive, Anna.”

“Yes,” Malcolm agrees wholeheartedly, looking me dead in the eyes, “let's make that our top priority. I don’t think I can take you having another near death experience.”

Malcolm turns his attention back to Will.

“Can you do me a favor before you leave?”