Man From Mundania (39 page)

assume either form. She had seemed so emphatically hu-

man! She had made herself small so that her weight did

not become a burden, knowing that her friend Ivy would

not let her fall.

Grey looked at Cheiron. "Uh, I've ridden a centaur

before, but not a winged one. Your wings, uh—"

"Sit behind them," Cheiron said. "And hold on tightly.

My magic enables me to fly not by powerful wingstrokes,

but by lightness of body, and you will be lightened too.

You could bounce off if not prepared."

"Uh, yes." He walked to the side, but Cheiron stood

taller than Donkey, and there were no stirrups. How could

he get on?

Chex came up. "I will help you." She reached down,

put her hands under Grey's arms, and lifted him up. He

flailed, surprised, and felt his back brush something soft.

Then he was over Cheiron's back and settling into place.

He leaned forward and got a double handful of mane as

the great wings spread. Suddenly he felt light-headed and

light bodied; indeed it seemed he might bounce off!

Cheiron leaped and pumped his wings, and they were

airborne. Grey felt as if he were floating. There was def-

initely magic operating, but it was good magic.

He looked to the side. There was Xap, flying strongly

with Ivy, his bird's beak seeming to cut right through the

air. Behind him Chex was lifting too, with Electra glee-

fully aboard. With each stroke of the centaur's wings, her

breasts flexed. Now Grey knew what he had brushed as

he was lifted.

Electra saw him looking, and waved. He took the risk

of releasing one handful of mane in order to wave back.

How could he be afraid when the child wasn't?

"It's hard to believe that she's two years older than

Chex," Cheiron remarked, turning his head briefly so that

his words were not lost in the wind.

"What?" Grey asked, confused.

"Ivy and Nada are seventeen. Electra is fifteen. Chex

is thirteen. But our foal Che is now a year old, being

tended by his granddam Chem. It can be awkward to judge

by appearances."

Grey looked again at the pair. Electra remained a child,

and Chex a very mature figure of both horse and woman.

"No offense, but I find that difficult to believe," Grey

said. But now he was remembering something Ivy had said

about that; it had faded from his memory because it was

part of the magic he had not then accepted.

"I thought you would; that is why I mentioned it. Chem

was part of the party that went to find Ivy when she was

lost as a child of three. It was on that journey that Chem

met Xap. There was no male centaur she found suitable,

and Xap as you can see is a fine figure of a creature. So

she bred with him, and in the following year Chex was

birthed."

"I, uh, am surprised that you discuss it so openly,"

Grey said, somewhat at a loss.

"We centaurs are more advanced, and therefore more

discriminating about proprieties than are human folk,"

Cheiron explained. "We treat natural functions as what

they are: natural. We reserve our foibles for what counts:

intellectual application."

"Uh, sure. But Chex—I thought centaurs aged at the

180 Man from Mundanii

same rate as human beings." Now he realized what his

problem was: the same as the one with buxom Nada. Nada

looked and acted too human to be credible as a serpent

until she actually changed, and Chex looked and acted too

mature to be credible as an adolescent. He was coming to

accept magic, intellectually, but there were aspects of it

that his deeper belief still resisted.

"Ordinarily they do. But animals age faster. Since Xap

is an animal, Chex was blessed with the natural conse-

quences of the crossbreeding: wings and faster maturity.

She grew at a rate between that of her two parents, and

reached sexual maturity at age six, rather than age three

or age twelve. Her dam, aware of this, tutored her inten-

sively so that her intellect kept pace. Thus it was that she

was a fit mate for me at age ten, though I was more than

twice her chronological age. For that I am duly grateful,

for winged centaurs are rare."

"Uh, how rare are they?"

"We two, and our foal, are the only ones in Xanth."

Grey had to laugh. "That is rare!" He looked once

more at Chex. "She looks so, so human, uh, in front, it's

still hard to believe she can be so young."

"You will find her young in no respect other than chron-

ological," Cheiron assured him. "It may be more con-

venient for you to think of her as my age, ignoring the

chronology."

"Uh, yes, that seems best." So he really wouldn't have

to make the adjustment that was giving him trouble.

They flew southeast, down toward what on the Florida

map would have been Lake Okeechobee. From this height

he really would not have known this was Xanth instead of

Florida; the trees and fields and lakes seemed similar.

Then he spied a cloud ahead. It did not resemble any

Mundane cloud. It had a puny, angry face. "I've seen that

cloud before!" Grey exclaimed.

"That is Fracto, the worst of clouds," Cheiron said.

"Wherever there is mischief to be done in the air, there

he is to be found. Apparently he tunes in magically. We

shall have to take evasive action before he gets up a

charge.''

Man from Mundcmia
        
181

"But he was—was in the gourd!" Grey said. "I thought

there was no contact between there and here. I mean, that's

the realm of bad dreams, isn't it?"

"Correct. That would have been the dream Fracto; this

is the real one. Their natures are identical."

The trio angled down toward land. The cloud tried to

extend himself below to intercept them, but was not fast

enough. Fracto could not catch them in the air, and would

have to settle for raining on them.

But the three flying figures did not actually land. They

brushed by the treetops as if searching for a suitable re-

gion—and kept on going. Before the cloud realized it, they

were beyond, and lifting once more into the sky. Fracto

tried to turn about and go after them, but there was a fairly

stiff wind that prevented him. He turned a deep mottled

gray and skulked off, seeking other mischief.

"Serves you right, soggy-bottom!" Electra called back

nastily.

"She has been associating with Grudy Golem," Chei-

ron said. "That is one of his old insults."

Maybe so. But Grey was satisfied with it. He didn't like

Fracto.

By evening they were approaching a feature of the land-

scape that definitely was not part of the Mundane penin-

sula: a mountain. At its jagged peak grew a monstrous

tree, and on the tree perched a mind-bogglingly monstrous

bird.

"Mount Parnassus," Cheiron said unnecessarily. "We

may not fly all the way to it, because the Simurgh does

not appreciate clutter in her airspace. We shall set you

down at the base of the mountain, and wait there for your

return."

They glided to a camping site Xap knew about close to

Parnassus. Ivy brought out the little snake and set it on

the ground, and suddenly Nada was there again, just as

lovely as before. She was nude, but Ivy had her clothes

ready, and in a moment all was in order. There were blan-

ket and pillow bushes nearby, and a beerbarrel tree that

was filled with boot rear. "Oh, I love it!" Electra ex-

claimed.

Man from Mundania

182

Grey remembered Ivy's warning, in the mock Castle

Roogna atop the dream mountain. Did the stuff really

work? He could not resist trying some and finding out for

himself. So while the others settled for water from the

nearby stream, he and Electra drew foaming cups of boot

rear from a spigot set in the bulging trunk.

"Bottom's up!" Electra said, and took a swig. Then

she jumped into the air. "What a boot!"

Grey just didn't believe it. He sipped his own drink,

while Electra waited expectantly.

Nothing happened.

"Maybe you didn't drink enough," she said, disap-

pointed.

Grey tilted the cup and swallowed a big mouthful. There

was no effect. It seemed just like root beer.

"Let me taste yours," Electra said suspiciously.

Grey gave her his cup. She sipped, then drank, and did

not jump. "It's a dud!" she said. "Yours must have gone

flat! Mine gave me a good boot!''

Grey tried hers, but with no effect, and after that it

didn't work for her either. "The whole tree's gone flat!"

she said. "I must have gotten the only sip that was fresh

enough." But she remained perplexed.

They returned to the camp, where the others had gath-

ered a nice collection of fruits, nuts, and bolts. They had

even found a gravy train and a hot potato collection, so

had potatoes and gravy.

The more he experienced of Xanth, the better Grey liked

it. Its ways really were better than those of Mundania,

once he got used to them, even if some, like the boot rear,

were overrated.

They slept individually, with the three four-footed crea-

tures spaced around the outside of the camp, sleeping on

their feet. Grey had a suspicion that Xap the hippogryph

would be aware of any danger, and would deal with it

swiftly. That beak looked wicked!

In the morning, after breakfasting on eggs from an egg-

plant, fried on a hotseat, along with green and orange

juice from nearby greens and oranges, they set out afoot

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