Mania and the Executioner (2 page)

“We aren’t letting you go there alone Cole!” Sara says.

“Fine!
I’ll ask Natasha to come!” I say. A mischievous smile slowly moves across Tia’s face. Sara sighs when she sees Tia’s expression.

“I’ll call Carla and ask that Natasha be reassigned. Just remember that you brought this upon yourself.” Sara says weari
ly and leaves the room.

“I’ll send Che
za in.” Tia says, still smiling as she leaves the room.

Cheza comes into the room a few moments
later, sits on the bed, and glares at me.

“Cheza?”
I ask. She continues to glare. This residual warning light, from a time when man was not the apex predator, suddenly goes off in my head and is telling me to run or I will be eaten. “Cheza, I know you’re angry with me but I need to know where Jason told you to go.”

“WHY!?
SO YOU CAN RUN OFF WITH BOOBZILLA!?” Cheza screams.

“Boobzilla?
Really Cheza? She’s a 32D at most.” I say while trying really hard not to picture Natasha in a bikini, using her bust to knock over an ant farm model of downtown Tokyo.

(FAIL
)

“OH SO YOU ARE TRYING TO RUN OFF WITH HER!?” Cheza screams.

“I’m just trying to protect you Cheza, in case this is a trap.” I say calmly.

“YOU DON’T CARE ABOUT ME AT ALL DO YOU!?” Cheza screams.

“Come on Cheza. You know that isn’t true, you’re just being a little irrational.” I tell her.

“IRRATIONAL!?”
Cheza screeches in dolphin.

(DOUBLE FAIL
)

That was a mistake. I don’t think I have ever seen Cheza this angry.

“TIA? COULD YOU PLEASE COME IN HERE? TIA!” I shout hoping that she gets here before Cheza stabs me. Tia walks in a second later; I should have known that she’d be right outside the door.

“Could you please help me convince Cheza to tell me the location?” I plead.

“Chezarei, tell Cole the location.” Tia says.

“NO!” Cheza screeches. Next thing I know, Shamu will come crashing through the window…or was Shamu the whale?

“Well, I tried!” Tia says while turning on the balls of her feet and walks out the door.

“THAT WASN’T TRYING!” I shout after her. “SARA?”

“I’M STAYING OUT OF IT!” She shouts back.

“Cole, there is nothing you can say that will get me to stay here.” Cheza says in a pitch that is understandable by humans. I look at her and I know that there
’s nothing I can do about it; I guess I’ll just have to protect her again.

“Alright.
Let’s go.” I say, resigning myself to defeat. I’m glad that we are done arguing because I’m tired. The universe decides that it isn’t done fucking me over as Natasha comes bursting through my door.

“Hey sweetie!
My boss just told me that I’m taking a paid vacation with my new boy toy! So where are we going?” Natasha says.

“AHHHH!”
Cheza screams and then pounds my chest…and just happens to get one of the recently broken ribs to break again and poke a small hole in my recently popped lung. I simply close my eyes and let it all fade away.

“Cole? Cole
, that’s not funny…Cole? COLE!? SARA!” Cheza screams.

****

Suddenly I’m sitting back in the booth with Jason, who has two different girls sitting with him this time. I assume they’re from his harem but I don’t recognize either the redhead or the brunette. Were it anyone else but Jason, I would have said the word harem sarcastically, implying that I don’t think it really exists. However, Jason is one of the few guys that I believe could actually juggle a harem without losing his mind or dying.

“Wow! That was quick!” He says
while snapping his fingers and makes a flaming shot appear in both of our hands.

“Bottoms up!”
Jason says as we both extinguish the fire with our free hands and down them. “Well CT, it’s been real but try to stay alive a bit longer this time.” Jason snaps his finger again.

****

I wake up to find my right side sliced open and Cheza on my mouth.

“Okay
, you can stop now Rei; it re-inflated.” I hear Sara say. I look over and see her holding a giant pair of tweezers in my chest. She pulls them out, taking a two inch rib fragment with them. I just close my eyes again and fall asleep.

…

Chapter 2: G5

[May 20th]

I wake up on my left side and notice Cheza sleeping in between my arms that I seem to have wrapped around her at some point during the night.

“I’m sorry I killed you again Cole.” Cheza mumbles as a single tear slips from her left eye to the bridge of her small nose. I reach
over and brush the tear from her nose as her eyes start to flutter open.

“Cole! I’m sorry! I’m so sorry!” Cheza cries while grabbing on to me.

“It’s alright Cheza. I’m fine.” I softly say.

“GOODMORNING YOU TWO!”
Tia shouts while barging into Cheza’s room. “Hurry up and get ready. I’ve got a jet waiting for you at Goodyear Airport, scheduled to leave at 10am. That gives you an hour.”

“What do you mean you have a jet waiting? For that matter, where are we going?” I ask.

“Private jet and Honolulu Hawaii!” Tia exclaims. “I’ve already made arrangements. There is some sort of convention in town so everything was booked except for one, three person suite for five nights. It’s under your name Cole.”

“I guess I’ll go pack—” I start to say while sitting up.

“Already did it.” Sara says while poking her head around the door. “Breakfast will be ready in five and then it’s off to the airport. Natasha will meet you guys there.”

“Why are we taking a private jet?” I ask
as Cheza grabs her suitcase and starts packing clothes.

“Because you are going fully strapped and it makes things easier this way. I had Sara ask Carla to make you a badge and papers for The Agency in case you run into any trouble. Natasha has it with her.” Tia whispers to me.

I head out to the kitchen to eat bacon and eggs with a large glass of orange juice in an attempt to get my blood back to normal levels. I walk through my room, towards my bathroom, while trying not the look at the complete mess that is my room; at least the naked corpse is gone. I step in the shower and expand my hearing to try and pick up any hints about our trip.

“With Natasha in the picture now, you may need to be more forceful with Cole, Chezarei.” I hear Tia say from Cheza’s bathroom, under the sound of the shower running. She most likely knows that I’m listening in so I assume that I am supposed to consider this my warning.

“Tia, I don’t know if I can do that…” Cheza says over the sound of the shower.

“Do you want to lose him Chezarei?” Tia asks.

“I’ll try my best.” Cheza says after a moment.

This trip might be a little bit dangerous for me if I stick with the ‘not sleepi
ng with my little sister’ plan. I exit the shower to find that my toiletries have already been packed.

“SARA! CAN YOU BRIN
G ME MY TOILETRY BAG?” I shout.

A minute later
, Cheza walks in my room wearing only a towel, and hands me my bag. She backs out of my room slowly, letting her eyes linger. I realize that Tia has been influencing her again when I see a copy of Tia’s seductive smile on Cheza’s face. I’m starting to wonder if the doors in the suite have locks.

I quickly get dressed in my standard
jeans and a white t-shirt, but I remember my jacket this time. Next, Cheza (wearing a hot pink camisole, matching flip flops, and white short-shorts) and I are off to the Goodyear airport, which is only about twenty minutes away. I see Natasha near the gate wearing white short-shorts, a yellow t-shirt with matching flip-flops, and a giant white floppy sunhat.

“Alright you two, have fun!” Tia says like a mom dropping off her kids for summer camp,
but her mischievous smile contorts the image.

Natasha hands me a
badge and papers when Cheza isn’t paying attention and the three of us walk to the private jet: a G5.

(No more frequ
ent flier bitch miles for my boy!)
I hear a famous scientologist say, courtesy of Airi.
1
I laugh out loud, comprehending the reference. This causes Cheza and Natasha to look back at me in confusion.

“Something just popped into my head; don’t worry
about it.” I say with a smile.

We board the jet and I love what I see. There’s a big comfy couch on the left side and two large reclining chairs on the right. I sit down in the center of the couch and rest my arms on th
e back as the girls look at the rest of the plane. With my blood levels still being low, I fall asleep in seconds.

…

I’m startled awake several hours later by Cheza, plopping down on my left side and scooting close to me. She grabs my left thigh and gives me a ‘Tia’ smile.

“We are going to watch a movie,
care to join?” She asks as a panel on the wall opposite the couch rolls down, revealing a 42” flat screen.

Natasha grabs a remote from the compartment, sits down next to me, and scoots in while grabbing my right leg; just as Cheza had done, and much to Cheza’s ire. She starts flipping through the
On-Demand movie list, stops on
Some Like It Hot,
and hits play. That’s funny; I just spoke with Marilyn yesterday. I am just now starting to realize how similar Cheza looks in comparison to Miss Monroe, with the exception that Cheza is smaller and slightly more pixie-ish.

We watch for about fifteen minutes before Natasha says, “Wait a second…this isn’t a porno!”

I chuckle, garnering a glare from Cheza that says she is going to destroy me, in addition to her digging her fingers into my thigh. What? So I’m not allowed to laugh now? Would she like me to put my balls in her purse too? The movie finishes as the plane hits the runway.

The three of us grab our bags and exit the plane. Natasha and I are
stopped briefly at security until we flash government badges that explain the guns and the swords and the bullets. We go out front and catch a taxi to our hotel: The Kahala Resort. Pulling up to the resort, my breath catches in my throat. This place is insanely nice. Gotta love that ‘We’re with the Gods’ package!

While e
ntering the lobby and heading towards the desk, Cheza and I lose Natasha on the way as she goes over to look at brochures near the door.

“Aloha! Checkin’ in?” The Samoan clerk asks
with a Hawaiian accent.

“Ah yes we are. It should be under the name Treyfair.” I reply
.

“Yes, here it is.
Reservation for Mista’ and Missus Treyfair for five nights. Here is your key. If you need any’tin, just ring the desk. Enjoy!” The clerk says, handing us a single key…Strange.

I enhance my senses, feeling that something is off
as I press the call button for the elevator. I hear the clerk say, in accent-less English, “I really hate using that accent. It just feels a little too…stereotypical.”

Natasha sees us and joins us on
the elevator. We get off at the top floor of the resort and follow the hall until we reach the door on the left.

“1701 should be right…” My voice trails off when I read the placard on the door: ‘Imperial Suite’

I put the key in the lock, turn it, and open the door. The entry hallway opens into a living space with a few plush leather chairs and a coffee table. A four-person dining table is in the adjoined room to the left, in addition to the full bar. Behind the bar is the door that leads to the bedroom…the only bedroom…with a California King Size bed…the only bed…

“This has got to be some sort of mistake.” I think.

(Mr. and Mrs. Treyfair. A single key. Tia’s mischievous smile)

This is no sort of mistake!

“HOW? HOW DID I NOT SEE THIS COMING!?” I shout towards the ceiling. I can almost hear Tia laughing her ass off from 1200 miles away…or something. Geography is not my strong suit. There aren’t even any couches in this room! I walk over to one of the phones.

“I guess I’ll call down to the…Tia said that this was the last room…” I say, my voice trailing off.

“And understandably too. This says that this room costs twelve thousand a night! And it also has its own elevator that goes directly down to the beach!” Natasha exclaims while holding a pamphlet that I assume she picked up while Cheza and I were checking in.

“Well, gods are as about as imperial as you can get.” I say. I look over at Cheza who is dumbstruck with this wide grin on her face. I hear her
giggling while whispering, “Mrs. Treyfair”.

“Hey
Cheza? Are you alright?” I ask.

Cheza snaps out of it, looks away
in embarrassment and then nods. I notice a door behind her at the other end of the suite, next to a bathroom that includes a shower with wall-to-wall jets and a Jacuzzi. I walk over and open the door. It’s a secondary bedroom with a single double bed.