Master No (42 page)

She needed to find that way out and block it.

Otherwise, Tennessee Smith would have one more thing to hate himself over. He would kill her father and it would hurt him, like another wound on his soul.

She might not be able to be with him, but she could give him respite this once.

“Don’t worry about it anymore.” Ten brushed back her hair.

“Why did you come here?”

“Like I said, don’t worry about it.” He sat back.

“I want to know what you were really looking for.” After everything she’d been through tonight, she felt like she deserved a debrief.

“I think your father’s documentation is on a computer in the compound I was held in. I think I’ll find all the evidence I need to take both your father and a good portion of The Collective down.”

He was wrong. “He wouldn’t put it on a computer. Never. Don’t get me wrong. There might be something there, but it’s going to be in code and he won’t keep that on a computer. He would use offshore accounts and write them down. In longhand.”

Ten’s eyes closed briefly. “It no longer matters. I don’t want you to worry about it. It’s something I’ll take care of.”

She was sure he would. He would do whatever was necessary. She finished cleaning the last blister and sat back. “I’m so sorry about Theo. I know you cared about him.”

Erin would be devastated. For all her words about breaking up with him, Faith knew Erin loved the man. They’d been happy together and now Erin was alone.

She knew the feeling. It was how she’d felt after she’d learned Ten had lied to her, except there was no recourse. Theo was gone. Erin couldn’t yell at him. She couldn’t scream and vow revenge for her broken heart. All Erin had now was sorrow.

There was no comfort for her friend. Erin hadn’t even looked at her earlier. She’d stared through Faith like she was seeing something else.

Suddenly the lies didn’t seem so big anymore. The betrayal a bit more insignificant. It wouldn’t work in the long run, but for now they both needed comfort. The storm was raging outside. There was nothing more to do for tonight.

“You won’t be comfortable on the couch. Please sleep on the bed.”

His lips turned down. “I’ll be all right.”

“I won’t. Look, Ten. Once we get back to reality, I know we’re going to go our separate ways, but I do understand what you were trying to do. I wish you hadn’t taken it to a physical level.”

“I needed to be able to protect you.”

She didn’t buy that line for a minute. “Don’t bullshit me.”

“Fine, I thought getting into bed with you was the fastest way to get on this island.”

Honesty hurt, but she’d asked for it. “If you had sat me down and laid out the evidence the way Hutch did, I would have helped you.”

“Would you?” His eyes narrowed as he eased back into his shirt. “Let’s say I show up one day out of the blue and lay out evidence against your father and sister. You’re telling me you would have chosen to help me without ever talking to them? That’s what I needed. I needed to blindside your dad. He couldn’t see me coming, though of course he did in the end. You wouldn’t have given them a call to ask ‘hey Pops, you been selling troop information for cash? You working with corporations to protect their interests at the cost of indigenous people?’ You take one look at that evidence and sell them both out without a single qualm?”

What would she have done if he’d walked in cold and laid out a case against her family? He wouldn’t have had the information about the vaccines. She hadn’t even known about those at the time. She wouldn’t have watched her father cart her lover off to torture him. All of those things had led her to believe the evidence. If he’d walked in off the streets, she very likely would have told him to blow it out his ass. “All right. I would have called them. But you didn’t need to sleep with me. You could have sent Erin in. She could have come down to Houston with me and I would have invited her and Theo down here. I would have believed her in the end.”

“I doubt that, Doc.” He sounded so tired. His head fell back as though he couldn’t stand to hold it up a second longer. “And Erin couldn’t be with you to protect you, though that wasn’t my primary mission in the beginning. You take a lover once a year. From what I can tell, you don’t have a truly emotional relationship with the man. Was I supposed to bring another civilian into this situation? It’s a good plan, by the way. Taking the lover. The way you work, you don’t have time for commitments. I get that. We’re more alike than you think.”

She liked sex. She wasn’t going to apologize for it. Ten was right. It was easier to find a Dom to spend time with than it was to become attached when she knew she was going back out in the field. Some people in society might call her names for it, but they could bite her ass for all she cared. She’d learned a long time ago that what society thought didn’t mean shit.

So why was she worried about what people would think of her? It had gone through her head that she couldn’t be with this man again because everyone would think she was pathetic.

Who cared what everyone thought? Since when did outside voices get to dictate her life?

“I got emotional with you,” she admitted.

His eyes opened, the hard line of his jaw softening. “Like I said, we’re very alike, Faith. When I started this mission, I only cared about one thing. I wanted revenge. I intended to sleep with you as a way to get to your father. In the beginning, I didn’t care what happened to you. You were a means to an end and getting into your bed was the quickest and easiest way to get what I wanted. If I could have gotten access to your father’s compound some other way, I would have. Right up until those three weeks.”

“When I was in Germany?”

He nodded slowly, as though the motion was difficult for him. “Maybe everything would have been different if we’d met and fallen into bed together. Maybe if that had happened I would have kept it purely physical, but I had to talk to you for three weeks without touching you. For the first time in my life, I had to…be intimate with a woman. Not in bed, but in other ways.”

She could imagine a man as lovely as Ten could pretty much sleep with anyone he wanted to. He wouldn’t have to charm women. They would fall into his arms, but she would bet they wouldn’t touch him emotionally. With her other lovers, she generally chose them because they had a lot in common. They were almost always in the medical profession and when they weren’t playing, they were talking business.

She’d been forced to talk to Ten about other things, to push past her own surface and reach deeper, give him more, find the things they had in common. “Those three weeks meant a lot to me, too. How many lies did you tell? We talked about the things we like. Did you make that up, too?”

She wanted to know the real man. She needed to know what had been false. It was a burning need.

“No. I really do love to read mysteries and I have a weird affection for movies with dinosaurs in them. I like to cook. It calms me. I like you. That’s pretty much a list of all the things I like in this world. Like I said, if I’d had an easier path, I would have taken it right up to those three weeks, and then it didn’t matter anymore.”

“What do you mean?”

His gaze caught hers. “I was going to have you, Faith. I’d never wanted a woman the way I wanted you.”

When he looked at her like that, she couldn’t think straight. “I don’t know that I believe you.”

“Why would I lie to you now? I promised never to lie to you again and I won’t. It’s why I told you, well, that stuff I told you when your father came for me. I don’t want to lie again. I want you out of this mess. When you’re safe, I’ll be able to breathe again.”

That stuff he’d told her had been him saying I love you. She wanted to believe him so badly. Even when her heart had been battered, she’d wanted something between them. “Why didn’t you fight when my father came for you?”

Ten sighed and sat up. “Because he killed your mother and if he had to, I think he would kill you. He’ll do what it takes to protect his secrets, and you need to remember that. Until he’s dead or behind bars, he’s dangerous to you.”

“You could have tried to get away.”

He brought his hand up to brush against her cheek. “He’s a smart man, darlin’. He would have known how to bring me back. All he would have to do is threaten you and I would have been back, so I was just being lazy in the end. I cut out all that useless running since I couldn’t leave you like that.”

Tears threatened because his words were so sweet. “I don’t understand, Ten.”

“I know,” he replied, a sadness inflecting his tone. “Which is why I want you out. I want you to go back to Dallas and let McKay-Taggart protect you until this business is done. Then you get your life back. You can go back to your clinic.”

She could. It was what she needed to do. Once all of this was over, that clinic would be all she had. When she thought about it, it was really all she’d ever had.

What did he have? What would Ten go back to after everything was done?

Something banged against the side of the house, making Faith nearly jump out of her skin.

Ten reached for her hand. “Hey, it’s all right. It’s only the storm. Hutch has the whole place wired with video. Even if the power goes out, the security system and those monitors are on a generator. We’re safe here.”

Only because her father had no idea where they were. “Once the storm blows over, he’ll come looking.”

“It won’t only be him. Those Chinese agents won’t let me go easily. I’m not the only one who wants a little revenge. But we’re safe for tonight. According to the reports, the storm should blow over by tomorrow afternoon. You’ll take off tomorrow evening.”

“I will?” She’d thought
they
were leaving, but then that had been Theo’s plan and he wasn’t here anymore. Ten was back in charge and it looked like the plans had changed.

“Yes. You and Erin and the rest of the team are heading back to Dallas. I have some things I need to clean up here.”

There was distance in his voice that made her question if tomorrow would be the last time she would see him. “You’re not coming back, are you?”

“No. I won’t go back to Dallas again. I broke those ties by getting Theo killed. I’m not going to be a reminder to everyone of what they lost.”

“Theo made the choice to go after you. You didn’t get him killed. You didn’t fire the bullet and you didn’t order him to go to that compound.” As far as she could tell, all Ten had done during his rescue was yell that he shouldn’t have been rescued at all.

“But it was my op. It doesn’t matter. He died on my watch and that’s all that counts. Ian will watch over you until the objective is achieved, and then you can go wherever you want. I’m going to make it safe for you.”

But he wouldn’t be with her.

The lights flickered and then died. His hand gripped hers. “It’s all right. It’s actually better for us to go dark. Just in case.”

Just in case her father’s men had braved the storm to look for them. Just in case the Chinese agents were out there right now. She’d been informed that this was the safest location they could find and all the locals believed it was empty this time of year. They only had to survive a few hours and then she wouldn’t see him again.

“Come to bed with me.”

A low chuckle accompanied his movement. In the shadows, she watched him struggle to his feet. “You’ve never been safer from a man’s advances than tonight, darlin’. I’m a little worried your father gave me an electrical vasectomy. Can they do that?”

She gasped. She’d told him to take off his pants, but he’d seemed fine. “I need to look at you.”

He huffed a little as he maneuvered them to the bed. “No, you do not. I’m hoping it was like the rest of what he did. Better than it seemed. It was the drugs that made the pain worse. I want to sleep, Faith. I want to hold you. Can you let me do that?”

She shouldn’t. He was going to leave her and no amount of anger would mask the heartache she would feel the last time she looked at him. Still, she needed his comfort, needed to give him some as well.

She curled against his body, looking for a spot that wouldn’t hurt, but he merely dragged her close. He wrapped her arm around his torso.

“I want to feel you, Faith. I don’t care about the pain. I want to know you’re here with me.”

She put her head on his chest and listened to the sound of his heart. Strong. Steady. Alive. No matter what her father had put him through, he was still with her.

It was enough for now.

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

Faith stepped out into the hallway, her eyes adjusting to the dark. It was long past time for dawn, but there was only a dim light illuminating the walkway. She couldn’t sleep. She’d left Tennessee, pulling away with reluctance, but she was so thirsty. There had been no little cups in the bathroom, but she’d seen bottles of water in the fridge earlier. She would slip away and grab one before Ten knew she was gone. He needed his rest after what he’d been through. He had more scars now, his body proving to be a map of the man.

She’d lain in his arms for hours, comforted by his nearness.

What was she thinking? He’d lied to her, used her, and she couldn’t work up the will to hate him. Not after tonight. Not after everything they’d been through.