Maude (11 page)

“I don’t usually eat until suppertime. I just have
my big breakfast and coffee in the morning and go on
through the day ‘til I get home.”
“That’s not good for you. Would you like me to
bring you something? I don’t mind a bit, and it would
give me and Lulu something to break up our day.”
“That would be nice, but don’t feel like you have
to. I’m used to doing without.”
I smiled at him. “I’ll see you later.” As we went
out the door, I heard him start whistling a soft, tuneless
song.
Lulu and I visited several stores. We priced the
fabrics and looked through samples of wallpaper. It
seemed everyone already knew who I was, and
everyone we met told me how much they liked
George. I noticed that not one of them told me they
liked his mother. In fact, they never even mentioned
her.
I wrote down the number of the wallpaper I liked
best, and the shopkeeper told me how much I would
need for the size of the room. It had a pattern of big
cabbage roses on it, and I found some light green
fabric that picked up one of the colors in the leaves that
would make a nice bedspread. There was a store that
sold ready-made bedding, but I just looked around for
ideas about what I wanted to do. I’d never even had a
ready-made dress and wasn’t about to waste money on
what I considered rich people’s things.
We stopped back by the sheriff’s office to report
on how much money we wanted to spend. George had
his feet propped up on the desk again and was sound
asleep when I opened the door. He stood and smiled
sheepish at me. “Not much crime in Kennett,” he said.
I laughed a little. “Good, I wouldn’t want to live
where there was.” I told him what the figures were
going to be for the paper and the fabric. I could see that
he was pleased I could sew my own things.
“Go ahead and order it, Maude. I guess we can
afford it all right. It’s about time we did something to
fix up the place.”
Lulu and I went back to the store and ordered the
wallpaper and fabric and headed home, happy with the
day. More people stopped to greet us on our way out
of the downtown area. There were a few ladies with
girls Lulu’s age, and they made friends right off.
School wouldn’t start for a few more weeks, and they
promised to see one another then. It seemed like the
friendliest place on earth. In my home town, strangers
were sometimes looked at suspiciously until we got to
know them. Both Lulu and I were feeling better about
things.
As we neared the house, we could see George’s
mother in the backyard. The clothesline was hung with
laundry, and she was standing next to the back porch,
twirling a chicken around her head. It was an ordinary
sight to anyone in a country area, but the look on the
old woman’s face gave me a start. She enjoyed what
she did. I put my arm around Lulu’s shoulder and
hurried her to the front door. “I guess we’re having
chicken for supper,” I said.
We took turns visiting the outhouse. When I
came out, I found Lulu and Mom Foley sitting together
on the back porch. There was a tub of steaming water
in front of them, and they were plucking the feathers
out of the chicken, the old woman pausing every now
and then to dip the carcass in the hot water. She had
the sleeves of her shirt rolled up past her elbows, and
I was surprised to see tattoos on her forearms. I tried
not to stare. Lulu was laughing at something her new
grandmother was telling her. The old woman fell silent
as I came near. “Can I peel some potatoes or do
anything to help with supper?” I asked.
Mom Foley got all stiff. “I got almost everything
done. There’s plenty of time to get it ready.”
“All right. I think I’ll get some things ready for
the wash for tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow? I just washed today.”
“I know, but I didn’t have our things out yet. I
don’t like to let them sit around dirty.”
Mom Foley nodded a sharp approval. “I’m glad
to hear it. I like things to be clean. Go ahead.”
“All right. I will.”
As I walked to the kitchen, I heard my motherin-law’s voice take up the story where she’d left off.
“My grandfather stole twenty horses from the Kaw
that day. One of the horses had a dog that followed it
home. The dog was in love with the horse and never
left its side. Whenever my grandfather rode the horse,
the dog would run behind them and go everywhere
they went.”
Lulu laughed again as her new grandmother
elaborated the story of the horse and the dog. I was
thankful that the old woman at least seemed to have
taken a shine to my girl, if not to myself. I could cope
with the way she felt about me as long as Lulu was
treated right.
I gathered up the things that needed washing and
then got out my big sewing box. The box was a
pleasure to me, and I added to it over the years until I
had a large collection of thread and buttons, patterns
for myself and Lulu, and even some that I’d used for
James. When a shirt or piece of clothing got too frayed
to wear, I always took the buttons and hooks off and
saved them. The fabric made dust cloths.
George was much taller than James had been. I’d
have to remember that when I cut his clothes. It was
my habit to look over each piece of laundry before I
washed it, checking for missing buttons and torn
seams. The familiar routine was comforting to me, and
when I finished with my own and Lulu’s clothes, I
looked in the bureau drawers at George’s. He didn’t
have many clothes, but they were clean and neatly
folded. A few of them needed the attention of a
seamstress. Several of his socks needed darning, and I
took out my darning egg and the soft yarn I used just
for socks and sat by the sunlight coming in the
bedroom window to repair the holes. I was proud of
the quality of my work. When I was done, the socks
looked almost like brand new. I thought I would knit
him some new ones for his birthday, whenever that
was. It occurred to me I had no idea how old he was,
but guessed him to be in his early thirties.
When George came home, we ate supper at the
kitchen table with polite but forced conversation. Lulu
and I were pleased with the plans to redecorate the
bedroom, and we went on about that. George’s mother
wore her usual sour expression. The only time her face
softened at all was when Lulu spoke. It was a curious
thing to me how the old woman had taken to Lulu. I
wondered why, and decided to ask George about it
when we were alone.
All evening I had the thought in the back of my
mind that it would soon be time for me to spend my
second night in George’s bed. I was grateful he hadn’t
wanted to have relations with me the first night and
wondered if he would this time.
We finally went upstairs. I made sure I had my
own lantern so I wouldn’t be left in the dark again. I
listened to Lulu’s prayers, tucked her in, and kissed her
goodnight. I couldn’t help but let her see my mood,
and Lulu wanted somehow to comfort me. She caught
me by the hand before I turned to leave. “It’s going to
be all right, Mommy. Mr. Foley seems very nice, and
I’m having so much fun with grandmother. You
wouldn’t believe how many stories she has about the
old days.”
I smiled at her and kissed her again before saying
goodnight.
In our bedroom, I sat on the edge of the bed as
George undressed, again just dropping his clothes in a
pile on the floor, and climbed into bed in his longjohns.
“I was wondering about your mother, George.
She doesn’t care for me, but she took to Lulu right
away. Why is that?”
“Her people love all children. It’s their way.”
“Her people? Oh, you mean the Indians.”
“I hope it doesn’t bother you that I’m half-breed
Osage. I should have told you before we married.”
“I don’t care one way or the other. I got some
Indian blood too--Cherokee.”
He looked relieved. “I guess most folks around
here do, but there’s some would hold it against you.”
“I never met anyone who did. My town was all
Christians. We treated everyone with the respect they
showed us.”
He stared at me for a minute. “I always thought
that’s what a Christian should be, but they don’t all live
up to it. When you’re a kid, and church-going people
call you names, it cuts deep.”
I thought that over. “Well, I guess there’s say-so
Christians, and there’s real Christians.” I took my
nightgown off of the hook on the back of the door
where I’d hung it. George took my hand. “I’d like to
see you, Maude.”
I felt my face turn red, but nodded, laid the gown
on the bed and started undressing.
As James had so long ago, George watched me
undress, and I pretended it didn’t bother me. When I
finished, I got in the bed next to him and he said, “I
don’t want to hurt you, Maude. You tell me to hold
back if you need to.”
I didn’t expect that he would hurt me. He’d been
so considerate and seemed to be such a gentle person.
If he was as good to me as he was to his horse, we’d
get along fine.
It had been so long since James, I wanted him to
touch me the same way, but he began the relations
right off, without so much as kissing me. He did it very
gently, but I could tell something wasn’t right.
“It’s all right, George.”
“I don’t want to hurt you,” he said again.
“I don’t think you will.”
He pushed further into me and it took my breath
away. I gasped and he pulled back.
“Are you all right?”
“It’s been ten years, George. Let’s just go slow
for a while.”
He started again but I could tell he was holding
himself back. I tried to relax, but couldn’t. He got done
in just another minute, still holding himself away from
me. Then he rolled over. I heard him let out a long sigh,
and in a minute he was asleep.
I was relieved. It hadn’t been satisfying to me,
but he was a kind, considerate man, and I was sure that
after a while we would work things out.
The next morning I woke when he got out of bed.
I sat up and smiled at him. “I’m going to do the wash
today. Why don’t you put on a clean set of underwear,
and I’ll throw those things in the tub with the others.”
“I just put these on Sunday morning.”
“That’s all right, I don’t mind.”
He unbuttoned the long-johns and dropped them
to the floor, stepping out of them and standing there
naked. I tried to hide my surprise, but couldn’t help
staring at his member. It was three times as long as
James’s had been, reaching halfway to his knee. I
guess he’d been waiting for my reaction, and it was his
turn to blush. “That’s why I was afraid I would hurt
you, Maude. I’ll always try not to.”
I looked down at the quilt. “I know you will,
George. It’ll be all right. We’ll get better with one
another after a while.”
He got a clean set of underwear out of the drawer
and slipped into it. “Ma won’t know what to think of
it, me changing right in the middle of the week.”
“I always did like to do the wash twice a week.
That way it doesn’t pile up.” I took a deep breath and
jumped into the subject that had been worrying me
ever since I got there. “I can see right out that your
mother doesn’t want me here, George. I don’t want to
get off to a bad start with her. Is there anything that I
can do to please her without giving up my rightful
place?”
He took a step back and held up his hands like in
surrender. “I can’t help you much there, just don’t
make her too mad. She’s not a woman you can cross
much.” He rubbed his chin. “Let her spend time with
Lulu. I see that it soothes her to have a child about the
house again. She hasn’t been the same since Bessie
left. Just feel your way with her until you two can work
out your territories, but don’t let her push you around.”
“I’ll do the best I can, George. I spent most of
my life doing what I was told, but I’m a grown woman
now. I’m not going to let her run all over me.”
“I wouldn’t want you to, Maude.”
He went on to the kitchen, and I got dressed. I
looked in Lulu’s room. She wasn’t there, and her bed
was already made. I went to the kitchen and found her
sitting at the table, watching her new grandmother
making coffee. The old woman had been telling Lulu
another one of her stories, but stopped talking when I
came in the room, and she only grunted in reply when
I said good morning to her.
She had a big iron coffee pot that looked as if it
held a half-gallon, and she spooned coffee in. I
couldn’t believe how much she put directly in the
water. She got out a big iron skillet and filled it with
thick strips of smoked bacon.
I went to the pantry and got the plates and cups
to set the table. Lulu stood and helped without being
told. It had been her job at home to set and clear the
table, and she enjoyed the grown-up responsibility.
The old woman didn’t miss what Lulu was doing. She
patted her on the head, “You’re my angel, aren’t you,
little one, and such a good girl.”
Lulu beamed under the praise. I smiled at her as
well and looked at Mom Foley. “Is there anything else
I can do to help?”
“Sit yourself down and watch. When I die, you’ll
want to know what George likes to eat for breakfast
and the right way to fix it.”
I pressed my lips together, but did as I was told.
George didn’t say a word. I watched as the old woman
fried up the bacon until it was almost burned. She took
the skillet off of the stove and set it in the middle of
the table, then put a plate of thick-sliced bread next to
it and poured about two cups of coffee into the skillet
of bacon grease.
The coffee was so thick it looked like black
molasses. It formed globs and floated around. George
saw me staring at it. “Black-eyed gravy,” he said. “My
favorite thing.” He put a slice of the bread on his fork,
dipped both sides in the mixture of bacon grease and
coffee, and lifted it to his plate. Lulu and I both
watched.
George ate several pieces of the greasy bread and
drank several large cups of coffee. I admired a healthy
appetite, but I wondered how he kept his slim waistline
after eating all that. I sipped at my coffee, but it was so
strong I couldn’t drink it. I added enough water to thin
it out a bit, but that cooled it off too much.