Authors: Casey Elliot
*****
The tears were dripping from Samantha’s cheeks and landing in the palm of her upturned hands. A tissue, which she’d torn to shreds, was tangled between her fingers and she pulled it apart and watched the little white pieces fall to the ground.
Across the desk, Detective Cooper was looking at her, taking note of every little move she made. For a second he noticed how pretty she was, but he reeled his thoughts in fast. This was a time to be professional, not chat up beautiful women. Although she did have that special shade of hazel in her eyes, the one that was so rare and that Cooper loved so much. He shook his head to bring himself back to reality.
“I’m so sorry for your loss Miss Richards. It must have come as such a terrible shock to you.”
“Not really,” she sniffed. “I always guessed something like this would happen.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, Anthony was always in trouble. Ever since I can remember he was always going against the grain and doing everything he knew he shouldn’t. You know when he was eight years old he used to steal neighborhood kids’ bikes and sell them,” she smiled at the memory. “He was a real entrepreneur, though, gotta give him that.”
“It sounds like he was a real character.”
“Yeah, that’s one way of putting it.”
Cooper offered Samantha another tissue which she gladly took before also ripping it to pieces. Her eyes were red and raw as she dabbed at them but Cooper still thought she looked like a sweet girl. It was then that she noticed the clock on the wall behind the detective and stood up.
“Shit! I start work in forty-five minutes!” and she reached for her coat and bag.
“No please, I don’t think you should go in today. Take it easy. I can call in for you.”
Cooper walked around his desk to comfort her. Placing his hands on her shoulders he urged her to sit back down and relax.
“Don’t worry. Just stay here, you don’t have to go anywhere.”
Samantha nodded with her mind numb and her body still in shock. Meanwhile, Brookes got up from his desk and proceeded to get her some coffee, nodding to his partner as he hurried down the hall.
“Now, if you let me know where you work I’ll go and give them a call. My partner will be with you in just a second,” Cooper tried to sound as understanding as possible.
After she handed over the number she slumped back in her chair with the grief washing over her in waves. Her body sagged in misery as she wiped at her face and she shivered as exhaustion took hold of her. It wasn’t long until Brookes returned with a steaming cup which she took gratefully, holding the warmth between her hands and letting the steam cleanse her face. She took a tentative sip of her coffee and when she looked up next, she saw the two detectives on either side of the desk with their eyes bearing down on her. For the first time since she arrived she felt as though she was about to be questioned and she looked up to Cooper with her wide eyes, mentally pleading that he’d let her go home to cry.
“I’m afraid I have to ask you some questions, now that we’ve had some time to get acquainted,” he began.
Samantha slumped and resigned herself to having to talk about Anthony and all the terrible things he’d one.
“That’s ok,” she sighed. “Better get it out the way.”
“I’ll try to be as quick as I can. Firstly, can you tell me, when was the last time you saw your brother?”
“Almost a year ago,” she remembered sadly. “We were at a family barbecue and well…it didn’t go so well.”
“Oh yeah?”
“He turned up drunk and high as always and it wasn’t long until a fight broke out between him and my Dad.”
“Your Dad?”
“Yeah,” she saw the suspicious look in Cooper’s eyes. “Why?”
“It’s just that people usually have their spouse or parents as their next of kin. It’s rarely a sibling.”
“My parents and him…. It’s complicated,” she explained. “For a long time, I was all he had. But we had a close bond you know? Even growing up I was always on his side when no one else was. As adults, I was always lending him money, letting him crash at my place. I did everything for Anthony I really did!” and her sobbing overcame her once again.
“So what happened? How come you hadn’t seen him in so long?”
Samantha took a moment to regain her breath. Nibbling on a broken nail, she tried to steady herself before continuing.
“That was his choice, not mine. Well, kinda… After the fight at the barbecue, he disappeared for two days. I was worried out of my mind, we all were. So when I got an email from him I assumed it was because he wanted to say sorry. But instead, he said he wanted nothing to do with any of us. Said my parents were abusive to him as a kid and that’s why he was so messed up. Then he said I sided with them.”
“Did you?”
“What?”
“Side with your parents?”
“Weren’t you listening? I was always sticking up for Anthony. Always trying to do my best for him, but in his crazy drug-fueled, paranoid state he was scared and angry with everyone. He pushed us all away, despite how much we loved him.”
The detectives remained quiet for a moment to give her a moment to collect herself. Cooper hated this part of the job. He couldn’t cope with the idea that his words could tear someone’s world apart. Nevertheless, it was something he had become used to and he’d lost count over the years of how many people he’d had to call with bad news.
It was then that his mind went into overdrive as it scanned the faces of every person he’d ever met on the job. There were too many to remember, but distinct faces always stood out and it was always the worst that stuck in his memory. His thoughts drifted to a serial killer who had preyed on teenage boys when he was a rookie. He was one of the unlucky cops who witnessed one of the crime scenes. To this day, he could still smell it.
“Detective? Hello?”
It was then he realized he hadn’t noticed Samantha talking.
“Sorry, what was that?”
“I said I can’t believe Anthony put me down as his next of kin. Kinda makes me feel a bit…. not happy, but glad he was thinking about me.”
Cooper gave her a weak smile.
“I’m pretty sure he would have never forgotten about you.”
*****
Two days had passed since Anthony had died and Samantha hadn’t left her apartment once. She knew it was unhealthy and that she’d have to go back to work eventually, but right now she just wanted to curl up in a ball and sleep forever.
The grief never left her, it only got stronger. There were times when she could barely lift her head from the pillow because it ached from crying, other times she was lucid enough to head into the kitchen for a sandwich. Mostly, she just stared at the ceiling with a thousand thoughts clouding her mind. They were memories of Anthony as a child and she still couldn’t believe that such a funny little boy could end up murdered in such a savage way. It seemed so unfair. There were things she still wanted to say to him and days she wanted to spend in his company.
As she felt the tears well up once again, she tried to stifle them but it was no use. They heaved out of her as though her chest was opening up into a wound. It was then that the phone rang for the tenth time that morning.
“Hello? This is Samantha Richards.”
“It’s Julie. Why are you being so formal?”
“Sorry, it’s just that I’ve had the police and funeral directors on the phone the last few hours. I didn’t realize it was you.”
“I’m so worried about you Sammy, please won’t you let me come over and take care of you?”
“Yeah soon,” Samantha said in a rather unconvincing tone. “I mean maybe later.”
“You need to let people in. It’s not good for you to just hole yourself up in that apartment. At least tell me you’re out of bed.”
Samantha was silent.
“Well, can you please tell me you’ve eaten something?” Julie was beginning to sound desperate.
“I have.”
“Thank, God.”
Cooper and Brookes were sitting at their desks with paperwork spread in front of them. Neither of them looked pleased to be designated such a mundane task and they were hurrying through it as fast as possible.
“This is bullshit,” Cooper flung his pen across the desk and crossed his arms.
Brookes looked up startled.
“Why are we stuck in here doing paperwork when we should be out there finding a murderer,” he continued.
“Story of my life,” Brookes pinched the bridge of his nose as he scribbled.
When he looked up he saw his partner staring out the window with a glazed expression on his face.
“You look lost again,” he muttered.
“Eh?” Cooper looked back to his partner.
“I said you look lost in thought again. Half the time it’s like you’re not even here.”
“Well, I wish I wasn’t,” Cooper huffed.
“I bet you’re thinking about that junkie’s sister.”
Brookes immediately regretted speaking and shrunk back in his chair hoping his partner hadn’t heard.
“What did you say?” Cooper asked through a clenched jaw.
“Nothin’.”
But he knew his partner was right, he had been thinking about Samantha. Something about her stuck in his mind. He couldn’t decide whether it was her striking good looks or her delicate mannerisms. Everything about her was petite and sweet and he had the strongest compulsion to protect her. Since she’d been in the station he’d had thoughts about holding her and telling her things would be ok. He wanted to see those hazel eyes of hers again, but more than anything he wanted to take the pain away and see her smile. As he looked out the window again he made a silent vow to himself to catch her brother’s killer at all costs.
“I need to get outta here,” he jumped from his seat leaving it swiveling on its own. “Need to get some air.”
“Sure,” Brookes didn’t look up from his work.
As he stepped out the back of the fire escape he looked down the metal steps as they descended onto the street. The wind was beginning to pick up and swipe at his wispy hair. He ran a hand over his head in a futile attempt at keeping himself groomed, and then resigned himself to the blustery breeze.
He shivered and wrapped his jacket around him, his eyes still fixed on the metal slats of the fire escape. Below him on the ground, a scene was unfolding. Two homeless men were swapping worn out shopping bags as well as insults. Cooper wondered what the hell they were doing. Other cops might have seen it as their duty to go down and investigate, but right now he had other things on his mind. Let the hobos live in peace, he thought as he headed back inside.
*****
Samantha was still struggling. It somehow seemed that the nights were becoming longer and the days were merging into each other. She didn’t know how much time she’d spent locked away in her apartment, but she guessed it was nearly a week.
Every morning like clockwork she had been calling detective Cooper for an update on the case, but he always had the same news. They were working on leads but still didn’t have a suspect in custody. At times, she wondered if it even mattered. No amount of justice could bring her brother back. At other times, she would be full of rage and wanted to see Anthony’s killer fry in the electric chair.
But on this cold and gray afternoon, she just wanted to be calm and at peace. Luckily for her, Julie had insisted on visiting with a casserole dish filled with chili and a tub of ice cream.
“I know you said you were eating but…I thought you could do with the company as well.”
“Thanks,” Samantha had slumped into her best friend’s arms. “It’s been so awful, just absolutely awful.”
“I couldn’t even imagine what it’s like for you,” and tears came to Julie’s eyes.
She tried to stifle them but they fell onto her blouse regardless. Brushing them away she looked around the apartment and decided what household chores to tackle first.
“When was the last time you opened the windows and let some air in?” she flung back the curtains as she tried to change the subject. “And what about the laundry, you need your sheets changed? And it looks like your kitchen needs to be cleaned. I’ll start on the plates and then….”
“Stop Jules. It’s ok,” Samantha grabbed hold of her arms. “Can’t we just…. Just sit down?”
“I’m so sorry Sammy,” Julie sat on the arm of the couch with her tears making little patter sounds on the floorboard. “It’s just such a shock… I remember Anthony so well, still think of him as a kid, though. Remember when we used to ride our bikes into the woods and pretend we were chasing bigfoot?”
Samantha started to giggle at the childhood memory.
“How could I forget? We stumbled across that homeless man who was camped out there and he scared the hell outta us,” she burst out laughing. “Yeah…. Us three used to get in all sorts of trouble.”
A silence came over the girls as they sat in quiet contemplation of the past.
“I just miss him so much,” Samantha said at last with a sniff.
“You two were always special,” Julie commiserated with her friend. “I always hated my brother.”
It was then that the phone rang and shocked the girls out of their tears.
“It’ll be the police probably, or some random aunt. I tell you, you wouldn’t believe the amount of people that come out the woodwork at a time like this.”
Samantha hurried to the phone expecting a pleasant voice on the end.
“Bitch,” came the first word and she stood frozen to the spot with her heart racing. “Your brother might be dead, but the debts not. It’s your problem now,” the voice snarled before the click of the phone sounded as the caller hung up.
For a few seconds, Samantha stood numb with the phone still clutched to her ear. She was staring into space barely believing what she just heard.
“Sammy, you ok?” Jules craned her neck over the back of the couch. “Everything ok?”
“No…. everything’s definitely not ok.”
Samantha was huddled under her coat with her hands clutching at a paper cup of coffee. The smell was bitter and it distracted her for a few seconds as she looked through the window of the double doors ahead of her. Detective Brookes was talking to Julie in the corridor and the conversation looked heated. She furrowed her brows as she guessed what they were talking about and she figured they must have been arguing over her.
Her vision was blocked when detective Cooper came into view with a pad of paper in his hand.
“Sorry about that, had to make a call. So tell me again, you’ve never heard from this person before?”
“No. This was the first time.”
“And he spoke of a debt that your brother owed?”
“Yes.”
“Any distinguishing characteristics?”
“Like what?” Samantha was becoming agitated and eager to get home.
“Like an accent? Or maybe even a stutter or speech impairment?”
“No, nothing like that.”
She sipped on her drink and tried to catch a peek around him to see Julie.
“Oh don’t worry about them,” Cooper said as he followed her gaze. “They’re just arguing over football.”
“Oh, yeah?”
“Yeah… Brookes never keeps his mouth shut once the beautiful game comes up in conversation.”
For most of the day Cooper had done his best not to think about her, but then she had to turn up at the station with that cute, tearful face of hers. He tried to act as professional as possible, even when he wanted to wrap his arms around her and kiss the tears off her cheeks.
As he pretended to scribble on his pad he looked into her hazel eyes and felt as though he was swooning. All she’d have to do was look at him the right way and he’d be all hers. Of course, she’d shown no interest in him at all and it irked him. He’d never had to work hard to impress a woman. All he had to do was stand there with his broad, muscular frame and cheeky face and they’d be all smiles and batting eyelashes. Samantha though, she was different.
“Are you finished?” her words interrupted his thoughts as she nodded to the pad on his desk. “I need to get home.”
“Oh sorry. Yeah, I think we’re all done here. If he calls again you phone me right away.”
“But that’s it? What if he turns up at my apartment?”
“We’ll have a car stationed at the entrance to your building. Don’t worry, no one will be getting anywhere near you.”
Samantha’s shoulders slumped in relief.
“Thank God,” she smiled. “But anyway…. I better get goin’.”
“How about I drive you home?” he didn’t mean to sound so forward but the words tumbled out before he could stop them.
“Actually, that would be great. Thanks,” that smile again, the one that gave him butterflies.
On the walk to the parking lot, they remained silent until they reached the car. Once inside the warmth of the vehicle with the doors slamming shut, Samantha began to relax. Without realizing, she found herself looking at his hand as it rested on the steering wheel. There was no wedding band so maybe he was single. She shook away the thought and looked out the window as they pulled out onto the busy street. She felt ashamed for thinking such a thing at such a terrible time.
Meanwhile, Cooper was sensing some tension from her and he glanced over to see her perfect profile framed in the window. He wanted to tell her how beautiful she looked, but turned back to the road instead.
“You must have so much on your mind?” he asked to make conversation.
“Like you wouldn’t believe,” she started to chew on her coat sleeve as her wide eyes stayed fixed on the sidewalk.
“And your parents, how are they coping?”
“Not well,” Samantha’s voice became croaky as she held in the tears. “My Mom keeps calling me up at all hours of the night wanting answers. She keeps wanting to know what she could have done differently. Thinks it’s all her fault. My Dad though, he’s just quiet. Hasn’t said a thing.”
Cooper then pulled the car into a nearby space as they reached Samantha’s apartment. Without thinking, he placed a hand on her knee and looked into her eyes.
“We’ll catch him. I promise.”
Samantha didn’t flinch at his touch but rather felt comforted by his warmth and the protection of his strong fingers. Without knowing what to say she nodded and then pulled open the door.
“Phone me anytime,” Cooper called after her as she closed the door and walked away.
She turned around one last time to make sure he was still looking at her. Then she smiled and waved before disappearing inside. Cooper couldn’t stop the wide grin that was spreading across his face.