Microsoft Word - Jakefinalnoappex.doc

jake colsen

Moorpark, CA

So You Don’t Want to Go To Church Anymore

Page 2

So You Don't Want to Go To Church Anymore

by Jake Colsen

Published by:

Windblown Media

7228 University Dr

Moorpark, CA 93021

(805) 529-1728

www.jakecolsen.com

This book or parts thereof may not be reproduced in any form, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted

in any form by any means—electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, or otherwise—without prior

written permission of the publisher, except as provided by United States of America copyright law.

Except where otherwise indicated, all Scripture quotations are from the Holy Bible, New International

Version. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by the International Bible Society. Used by permission of

Zondervan Bible Publishers.

International Standard Book Number: 978-0-9647292-2-3

Copyright © 2006 by Lifestream Ministries

All rights reserved

0123456 vp 7654321

Printed in the United States of America

Second Printing

Cover Design courtesy of MercyArts Studio

([email protected])

So You Don’t Want to Go To Church Anymore

Page 3

To the Blessed Ones—

those today and

throughout history

who has been insulted,

excluded, and lied about

for simply following the

Lamb beyond the accepted norms

of tradition and culture.

Matthew 5:11

So You Don’t Want to Go To Church Anymore

Page 4

Contents

1.

Stranger and Stranger Still ................................................................................... 6

2.

A Walk in the Park ..............................................................................................12

3.

This is Christian Education?..............................................................................24

4.

Why Your Promises Haven't Worked ................................................................37

5.

Love With a Hook ..............................................................................................46

6.

Loving Father or Fairy Godmother? .................................................................55

7.

When You Dig a Hole For Yourself,

You Have to Throw the Dirt on Someone .....................................................63

8.

Unplayable Lies................................................................................................. 72

9.

A Box By Any Other Name.................................................................................81

10.

Won to Trust.......................................................................................................93

11.

Taking Flight ................................................................................................... 103

12.

The Great Gathering....................................................................................... 115

13.

A Final Parting................................................................................................. 128

So You Don’t Want to Go To Church Anymore

Page 5

Acknowledgments

The crafting of this book has been a four-year journey, where we have posted the rough draft of each

chapter in succession on-line. We had hoped to complete it in a year, but it took us four. So, we most want

to thank our patient readers who endured this experiment with us, encouraged us by their comments and

added to this content with their own stories and questions.

We’ve also had some marvelous people read and proof the manuscript for us. Canadians Bruce and Judy

Woodford worked through every chapter with us, proofing for our mistakes and adding their ideas. In the

print phase we added other editors to help shape this manuscript—Julie Williams, Paul Hayden, and Mitch

Disney. Thanks to you all. If any mistakes survived their proofing, it was probably due to Wayne’s

irresistible urge to tweak the manuscript until the last possible second.

Our cover design was graciously provided out of the clear blue by Stephen at MercyArts Studio

([email protected]) in Chicago, Illinois with help from Dave Aldrich of Rhode Island, who also

designed much of the artwork for our website: www.jakecolsen.com.

We also want to thank our wives for their outrageous support and encouragement in this project and the

many brothers and sisters who have helped show us ‘a more excellent way.’

So You Don’t Want to Go To Church Anymore

Page 6

- 1 -

Stranger and

Stranger Still

At that moment he was the last person I wanted to see. My day had been bad enough already; now I was

certain it was about to get worse.

Yet there he was. A moment before he had poked his head into the cafeteria before walking over to the

beverage station and pouring himself some fruit juice. I thought about ducking under the table, but quickly

realized I was too old for that. Maybe he wouldn’t see me back in the corner. I looked down and covered

my face with my hands.

Out of the cracks between my fingers, I could see he had turned, leaned back against the counter and took a

drink surveying the room. Then he squinted towards me as he realized he wasn’t alone and with a surprised

look he started towards me. Of all nights, why here? Why now?

It had been our worst day ever in a long and torturous battle. Since three o’clock that afternoon when the

asthma made its first attempt that day to strangle Andrea, our twelve year-old daughter, we had been on

guard for her life. First we rushed her to the hospital watching her struggle for every breath. Then we

watched as the doctors and nurses battled with her asthma for the use of her lungs.

I admit I do not deal with this well, although you’d think I would with all the practice I’ve had. My wife and

I have watched our daughter suffer all of her life, never certain when a sudden attack would threaten her life

and send us scurrying to the hospital. It makes me so angry to watch her suffer and no matter how much

we’ve prayed for her and had others do the same, the asthma continues to get worse.

A couple of hours ago the medication finally kicked in and she began to breathe more easily. My wife

headed home to get some much-needed sleep and relieve her parents who’d come to be with our other

daughter. I stayed the night. Andrea finally fell asleep and I found my way to the cafeteria for something to

drink and a quiet place to read. I was too wired to sleep.

Grateful to find the place deserted, I poured myself a cup of coffee and sat down in the shadows of a distant

corner. I was so angry I couldn’t even think straight. What had I done so wrong that my daughter must

suffer like this? Why does God ignore my desperate pleas for her healing? Other parents gripe about playing

taxicab for all their children’s activities. I don’t even know if Andrea will survive her next asthma attack and

I worry that the steroids she’s on will stunt her growth.

So You Don’t Want to Go To Church Anymore

Page 7

Somewhere in the middle of a good wallow in my anger, he poked his head into my private sanctuary. Now

he was walking over to my table and I honestly thought about punching him in the mouth if he dared to

open it. Even though deep down, I knew I wouldn’t. I’m only violent inside, not on the outside where

anyone else can see it.

I’ve never met anyone more frustrating than John. I was so excited when we first met, and honestly I’ve

never met anyone as wise as he. But he’s brought me nothing but grief. Since he’s come into my life, I’ve

lost my life-long dream job, been ostracized from the church I’d helped to start 15 years before and even

found my marriage in rougher waters than I’ve ever known.

To understand just how frustrated I am you would have to come back with me to the day I first met John. As

incredible as the beginning was, it doesn’t compare to all we’ve been through since.

My wife and I celebrated our 17th wedding anniversary by taking a three-day trip to Pismo Beach on the

central California coast. On our way home on Saturday, we stopped in downtown San Luis Obispo for

lunch and shopping. Its re-vitalized downtown is a major draw for the area and on this sunny April day the

streets were jammed.

After lunch we split up since our preferred browsing places are quite different. I went to loiter in the

bookstores while she trolled the clothing stores and gift shops. Finishing before our scheduled rendezvous

time, I had perched myself against the wall of a store while nursing a chocolate ice cream cone.

I couldn’t help but notice the heated argument going on a few feet up the street on the curb in front of The

Gap. Four college-aged students and two middle-aged men were holding bright blue handbills and

gesturing wildly. I had seen the handbills earlier, tucked under windshield wipers and lying scattered in the

gutter. It was an invitation to a play about the flames of hell that was being produced at a local church.

“Who’d want to go to this second-rate production...?”

“I’ll never set foot in a church again...!”

“The only thing I learned in church was how to feel guilty!"

“Been there, done that, got the scars and ain’t going back...!”

In the few moments since I had begun my eavesdropping, I don’t think any one of them actually finished a

sentence. Another would interrupt as if they would burst from the pressure if they couldn’t add their own

venom.

“Where do these arrogant people get off thinking they can judge me and...?”

“I’d like to know what Jesus would think if he walked into one of these churches today...!”

“I don’t think he’d probably go, he seemed...”

So You Don’t Want to Go To Church Anymore

Page 8

“And if he did, he’d probably fall asleep!”

Laughter drowned him out.

“Or maybe he’d die laughing...!”

“Or crying,” another voice offered which caused everyone to pause and think a moment.

“Do you think he’d wear a suit and...?”

“Only to hide the whip he’d sneak in to do a little house cleaning.”

The increasing volume drew the attention of those passing by. Their pace would slow as they were drawn

into the commotion. Some drawn by the passion and intrigued by the assault on something as sacred as

religion joined in like puppies at the food bowl. Still others hung around on the fringes to listen. Some even

asked me what was going on.

Now a full-fledged argument developed as some of the newcomers challenged the anti-church cynics.

Accusations volleyed quickly in the crowd. Most of them I had heard before--complaints about extravagant

facilities, hypocrites, boring sermons, always asking for money and burnout from too many meetings.

Those that sought to defend the church had to admit some of these weaknesses but tried to point out many

good things churches have done.

That’s when I noticed him. He could have been anywhere from late 30’s to early 50’s. It was difficult to

tell. He was short, perhaps only 5’4”; with dark, wavy hair and an unkempt beard.Both were peppered

with streaks of gray. In a faded green sweatshirt, jeans and running shoes, his rugged looks made me

wonder if he was a holdover from the rebellious 60’s; except that he wasn’t shuffling by aimlessly.

In fact what had caught my eye was the determined purpose of his gait, moving directly toward the growing