Merry Ex-Mas (5 page)

Except for the fact that I didn't want to spend Christmas with my ex-lover and his wife and both of their parents. What kind of celebration would that be?

I could understand all of the grandparents wanting to spend time with Angel, but couldn't they do that at a wedding or a funeral, the way normal Americans got together?

I shook my head. I had no idea what I was going to do.

"Oh, holy
…
" and then, just before I muttered what I really wanted to say, I thought about the season and edited my words. Taking a deep breath, I said, "O' Holy
…
Night!"

I slipped into the booth across from Kendall and Asia. "Sorry I'm late," I said to both of them.

"Do we look like we care?" Asia held up her martini glass as if she was about to give a toast, but then she took a sip instead. "Thank you for choosing the Martini Bar for our prayer meeting." She giggled.

"A prayer meeting?" I said with a frown. I was about to tell Asia not to say something so blasphemous. As if I would call a prayer meeting in a bar. But I didn't have to say a word. Kendall would handle Asia; she never let her get away with anything. It was like a torque reaction
—
Asia opened her mouth and Kendall threatened to punch her in it. So I just sat back and waited for the battle.

From the first day when Pastor Ford had asked me to lead a prayer group for women who, like me, were having challenges dealing with their exes, Kendall and Asia had gone at it. Each time, it was like watching prizefighters in a championship boxing match.

Yet, though they fought, they loved each other, too. It amazed me how close we'd all become. Our hangouts were just about a weekly thing, where we shared our trials, our tribulations, and brought all of our cares to each other. We talked, we laughed, we prayed.

And it wasn't just about the bad times, either. We were all at good points in our lives and often we got together to celebrate triumphs, too. Since 2007, meeting up with Kendall and Asia had been some of the highlights of my weeks.

And that was the reason why I'd called this get-together. Having been through their own ex-capades, as we liked to call it, I knew they would understand and help me get through this train wreck of a Christmas I was sure to have with Quentin. I could just feel it coming
…
I felt it in my spirit. So I needed my girls, Kendall and Asia.

That was when I noticed it; Kendall hadn't said a word, and not only that, she was sitting there with a drink in front of her. Now call me crazy, but the brown liquid that filled that screwdriver glass didn't look a thing like the water that was always my fitness girlfriend's drink of choice.

"What's that?" I asked. I forgot all about the manners that my mother had taught me; I pointed my finger straight at Kendall's drink.

Kendall held my stare, then, with her eyes still on me, she lifted that glass and took a long, long swallow. The way she pursed her lips and squeezed her eyes shut, I guess the drink burned as it made its way down her throat. Finally, she said, "This is a whiskey sour."

"A whiskey sour? You?"

"Uh
…
yes
…
me," Kendall replied with the same force behind her words that I guess I'd just used. "Do you see anyone else here?"

"She could've thought your drink belonged to me," Asia said as she took another sip of her own martini. "You know I can handle two."

When Asia giggled again, I wanted to take that drink away from her, but my focus was on Kendall. Clearly something was wrong. First, Kendall never drank anything stronger than water
…
well, except sometimes she would go for it and have an unsweetened iced tea. But my friend was all about being healthy and not drinking her calories. "I'm just surprised," I said to Kendall. "That's all."

"Well, things change. Nothing stays the same." Kendall paused and swallowed hard as if she were fighting to hold back words or tears. "And anyway, if you didn't want me to drink, why did you set up this prayer meeting in the Martini Bar?"

This time, Asia laughed out loud. "See what I'm saying? This
is
a prayer meeting."

I shook my head. "No it's not. We're just girls getting together because, today, I needed a drink!" I glanced around, and when I saw one of the waiters looking our way, I raised my hand and waved at him.

Kendall and Asia's eyebrows rose in sync, but they didn't say a word until I gave my order to the waiter. "I'll have a pomegranate martini."

"Pomegranate?" Asia and Kendall said together.

More laughter from Asia before she took another sip leaving just a drop of liquid in her glass. "It's about to go down at this meeting," she said with so much cheer, I thought she was about to get up and dance. "Y'all are always calling me the lush
—
but not today. I think the two of you are gonna hold it down for me!" When Kendall and I stayed silent, Asia asked, "Okay, somebody better tell me something. What's wrong? I mean, aren't we all supposed to be merry with Christmas?"

"It's not Christmas until the day after tomorrow," Kendall snapped. "Don't rush it."

I agreed, "I'm not ready for any kind of Christmas."

Asia frowned. "Well, I know why I'm not filled with holiday cheer," she said, suddenly solemn, "but what's y'all's excuse? Last week, y'all were deep into the holidays."

"A lot can happen in a week," Kendall growled.

"Exactly," I said, "and that's the reason why I wanted to meet up
—
because I need help; I need you to talk me through something."

"Well, I'm glad you hit us up 'cause I need to talk, too," Asia said; all of her laughter was gone now.

I glanced at Kendall, but she lowered her eyes and stared at her glass.

"So," Asia began, "what's your drama? And before you answer, I bet it's not as bad as mine."

"I bet mine's worse," I said, answering Asia, though I kept my eyes on Kendall, as she kept her eyes on the bottom of her drink. I figured that if I just started talking, Kendall would come around. She always had an opinion, and as soon as I told her what was going on with me, she'd forget about what had her so down. So I said, "Are you ready for this? It seems like I'm going to have to spend Christmas with Quentin."

"Get out," Asia exclaimed. "That's what I wanted to talk about. I'm gonna be in my own Christmas prison
…
with Bobby and his wife." That thought made her slump lower in her chair. "You go first; I don't think I can talk about mine yet," Asia said as she raised her glass, indicating to the waiter that she wanted another martini.

My frown deepened. I couldn't believe that my news hadn't made Kendall sit straight up. Or at least look at me. But if it weren't for her eyelashes fluttering every few seconds when she blinked, I would've thought that Kendall was asleep.

But I started talking anyway. Before I finished, Kendall would be right there with me. "It's because of Christopher," I started. And then, I told how I was being emotionally blackmailed into having what I knew was going to be the worst Christmas.

"It doesn't sound so bad," Asia said when I finished.

"How can you say that? You know I don't really like Quentin after all he put me through," I said.

"That's my point," Asia said. "You're in a better place because not liking him is better than loving him." Asia sighed. "I still love Bobby. Yeah, I'll admit it," she said, as if I didn't know that.

Maybe Asia thought it was a secret, but the world knew that she still loved Bobby Johnson. Asia did a good job of pretending not to care. But it was clear every time Asia uttered Bobby's name that her heart belonged to him.

"Yeah, I still love him," Asia sniffed, as the waiter handed her another drink. "And now, I have to spend Christmas with the man I love and the woman he loves." She paused, and then wailed, "I don't want to do it!"

Oh, my god! I shrank down in my seat, then glanced around the bar hoping that no one was looking at us. It seemed, though, that the Christmas muzak that played through the speakers above was louder than Asia's cries.

But clearly, Asia was in some kind of distress.

"Well, if you don't want to do it, don't," I whispered, hoping that Asia would take my hint and lower her voice.

"I have to." Asia sobbed loudly. "If I want to spend Christmas with my precious little girl, then I have to do it with Bobby and Caroline, too." And then, Asia told her story. She repeated the phone call she'd had with Bobby word for word and ended with, "If I don't do it, I'll spend Christmas alone because Aunt Beverly is in New York until the day after Christmas." She paused and squinted as if she just had a new thought. "Actually, that's probably a good thing 'cause you know how my aunt gets down
…
always preaching. She'd probably pray over dinner that God blesses Bobby and Caroline so that they'll have a long, long marriage," she moaned. "She wouldn't say anything good about me and Bobby at all!"

Now I knew for sure that Asia'd had too much to drink. Did she really expect her aunt, our pastor, to say something positive about her affair with a married man? Pastor Ford had always outwardly disapproved of Asia and Bobby.

"Aunt Beverly just never understood," Asia cried, continuing what I felt was some kind of drunken rampage. "No one did. I love Bobby, and as the mother of his only child, we were supposed to be together
…
forever," she bawled.

As Asia cried, I shook my head and looked down at my drink. If my martini was going to have me acting like that, I needed to get something else. I was just about to lift my hand to call the waiter over and get a glass of water, when
…

"You think you got problems."

Slowly, I brought my hand back down, and Asia and I turned to Kendall. She'd whispered her words, but we'd heard her clearly enough. We both sat there, silently, waiting for Kendall to say a little bit more.

A couple of beats and then, "I have to spend Christmas with my sister
…
and my ex-husband." Kendall still didn't look up.

"Oh, em, gee!" Asia exclaimed. "Are you freakin' kiddin' me? How did this happen? All three of us have to spend Christmas with our exes!"

"But mine will be worse than yours," Kendall said softly.

Asia sucked her teeth and took another sip. "Why is yours worse, Kendall? I just sat here and poured my heart out about how I love Bobby." She pounded her chest. "At least you don't love Anthony," Asia went on. "So mine is much worse than yours and Sheridan's combined."

Kendall still hadn't raised her eyes, but when she shook her head, tears slid down her checks and into her still half-filled glass.

I jumped up and rushed to the other side of the booth. I scooted onto the seat next to Kendall, pushing Asia against the wall. But I ignored her shouts as I wrapped my arms around Kendall. "Honey, what's wrong?" I lowered my head so that I could see Kendall's face; her skin was soaked with tears.

My goodness! Had Kendall been crying that much while we'd been sitting here? How had I missed it?

"Please, Kendall, tell me what's wrong."

Asia answered for her, "She just told you she has to spend Christmas with Sabrina and Anthony, and she thinks that's something to cry about. But I don't understand what's the big deal. She doesn't have to do it," Asia said as if Kendall wasn't sitting right there. "There aren't any children involved like with you and me. Kendall can just stay home. But my deal
…
I have to go," Asia sobbed before she took another gulp of her martini.

If I could've reached around Kendall, I would've slapped some sense into Asia. But instead, I did my best to ignore her, at least for the moment, and give all my attention to Kendall.

"Please, honey, tell me what's wrong?" When Kendall gave me nothing, I decided to try the Asia route. "Well, maybe you don't have to spend Christmas with them. I know you'd only do it because of your dad
…
"

As soon as I mentioned Kendall's father, Kendall's shoulders quaked, and now she sobbed out loud, too.

"So, why don't you spend Christmas with us?" I asked, trying to get the words out quickly. I was thinking that was a great solution. Kendall had joined me for Christmas a couple of times over the years. Most of the times, she celebrated the holiday out of town with friends
—
at least that's what she told me, though I can't say that I always believed her. I had a feeling that Kendall spent many of those Christmases alone. Something that she once told me she loved to do.

That's why I couldn't figure this out. Kendall said she would never be around Sabrina and Anthony again. Now when most people told me something that they would never do, I always said,
“
Never say never.
”
It was a clich
é
, but the truth was, no one ever knew what they would do
—
except for Kendall, the exception to that clich
é
. When she said never, she meant it. And nothing would change her mind.

Except
…
something
had
changed. Something that had her so upset.

"Spend Christmas with us," I said. "And then you can spend the day after Christmas with your dad."

Kendall went from sobbing to wailing.

"I can't do that," Kendall cried. "I can't wait for the day after Christmas. I have to be there on Christmas."

I was trying to remember if I'd ever seen Kendall cry before. Even if I had, I knew it wasn't like this. I was sure that Kendall cried in private; didn't we all? But in public, she was the rock amongst us. She hardly showed any emotion
—
except for anger mixed with a pinch of bitterness.