Miles From Home (8 page)

“Sam! Put me down, now!” I exclaim, giggling and kicking my legs.

“Not until you agree that there’s nothing better than Cheetos. You have to say it out loud.” He carries me down the aisle towards the potato chip section.

“Okay, okay . . . Cheetos are . . . okay, I guess. Now put me down!” I wiggle for him to release me. He gently sits me back down on my feet and kisses the top of my head.

I grab a bag of Cheetos and throw them at Sam.

“Here, just don’t touch me with your orange nasty fingers after you’ve eat them,” I snicker.

“Can we get some Miracle Whip to dip them in?” he teases. I roll my eyes and walk away as he laughs.

Standing in the checkout lane, Sam grabs his wallet to pay. “Stop!” I shout, trying to push his money back. “You paid for breakfast, so it’s my turn.” I step in front and pay, leaving the Cheetos for him to carry.

When we get into our room, we set our bags on the table. Sam grabs his guitar and I pick up my phone; three missed calls. The first two are from Sydney and Aunt Virginia. The third is from Marissa Brown, a realtor in New York who helped me find a place to rent while I attend school in the fall. I text Sydney first, telling her I’m fine and I’ll call her when I stop for the night. I pull up my aunt’s number and push call, leaving a voicemail, telling her things are good and I should be in New York City soon. I promise to call her later tonight. Sam shoots me a look when he hears the message, and I give him a weak smile, knowing he will question me about lying to my family.

I listen to the voicemail from Marissa. “Hi, Maggie, it’s Marissa Brown with Metro Leasing. I have secured the fully furnished studio apartment on Riverside Drive that you decided on. As soon as you get into town, call me and we’ll make arrangements for you to sign the lease papers. As soon as that is done, you are free to move in anytime. I look forward to hearing back from you.”

I feel a twinge of excitement rush through me as I listen to the voicemail a second time, making sure I made note of all the details. Just the thought of having my own place in a new town gives me the confidence I need to succeed at becoming what I’ve always dreamed of. All the endless hours of classes and practice are finally paying off and my thoughts drift to the memories of how much my mother sacrificed so I could do what I love the most; dance. She selflessly gave up so much to make sure I attended the best possible dance studios with the best instructors. I can remember hearing my dad argue with my mother about how he didn’t like that she drove me an hour both ways to the studio three days a week, and how ridiculous the prices were for the classes and private instructors. She knew it was a dream that I pushed myself to fulfill, and she always saw the potential that my father refuse to acknowledge.

I plug my phone back into the charger and set in on the bedside table, looking over at Sam as he concentrates on his guitar. I walk over and take the guitar from Sam and set it against the wall. Sam looks up at me as I straddle him and sit on his lap. I put my hands behind his neck and pull him towards me, kissing him softly on the lips. He smiles when I pull back to lean my head on his shoulder.

“I need you to know that there’s no other place I’d rather be than right here with you, right now,” I whisper in his ear. I hear him sigh as he wraps his arms tightly around me.

“And there’s no other place I’d rather be than right here with you too,” he whispers back. Sam takes a deep breath while I sit up. “Maggie, I’m a different person when I’m with you. I see everything in a new and different light. Your enthusiasm and your love for life seeps into my heart and soul, but I’m also scared at the same time. I don’t want to think about saying goodbye in a couple of days.”

I feel a lump form in my throat when I hear these words, and swallow it down as I look into Sam’s eyes.

“Sam, I hope you know I feel the same way. You make me laugh and smile; it’s been a long time since I’ve feel so happy and alive. I want you to know that I will never forget you. We can still stay in touch; I would be sad knowing I couldn’t hear your voice. Please tell me that you want the same.”

Sam smiles and says, “Of course I do, Maggie; I want to be able to hear about what’s going on in your life and want to know you’re happy, safe, and know about your school.”

“Good, I’m glad we got that out of the way.” I stand and walk over to the bed, sitting on the edge and giving Sam an inviting look while I move farther onto the bed. Sam follows.

“I guess I’m gonna have to look into getting a cell phone for sure now,” he says, laying down next to me.

“Sam, you crack me up. I thought you were kidding this whole time about not having a cell phone. I mean who doesn’t have a cell phone these days? Yes, Sam Austin, you need a cell phone,” I say, as he pulls me closer to him.

I lay facing away from Sam as he lays pressed up against my back, his arms are wrapped around me. I feel as though nothing exist on the other side of that door, nothing but Sam and I. Closing my eyes, I trace my finger along Sam’s arm while we both drift off and I dream of Sam and tearful goodbyes.

I feel Sam slowly shake me awake and I open my eyes. He leans in to kiss me, smelling and tasting of peppermint. “It is 1:00 p.m. Are you still up for a walk around the lake?” he says softly.

I turn and wrap my arms around his neck, pulling him closer. “Yes, I am. Mmm . . . you smell good.” I nuzzle my face in his neck and kiss him.

“I had a few Cheetos while you were sleeping, and I wanted to make sure there were no traces of their awesomeness left on my breath so I brushed my teeth for you.” When he blows in my face, I push him away.

“Yuck! Get away from me!” I squeal and Sam grabs my hands, holding them over my head as he tries to kiss me.

When I finally give in, Sam leans down and looks me in the eyes. “If we don’t go now, we will never get out of the bed. I’ll make sure of that.”

I hop up and go in the bathroom while Sam waits at the front door. Sam grabs the bag of snacks and I take an extra blanket from the closet. Then we walk out into the sunshine and along the path that leads to the bed-and-breakfast’s main house.

“Maybe I should go in and ask them how to get to the lake,” Sam says, as we climb the steps, and of course, Tilly is busying herself behind the desk. She looks up and smiles when we ask for directions.

“It’s actually very close-by. Just go out to the street and go right. It’s about a fourth of a mile down the hill, you can’t miss it.”

We walk in the direction of the lake and spot it as we come over the hill; it’s beautiful, with lots of trees and wildflowers. A perfect place to spend a nice afternoon. We follow a small dirt path that winds around the lake until we spot a small secluded area under a huge tree, well hidden and very shady.

“This looks like the perfect spot. What do you think?” He turns to me and wiggles his eyebrows.

“Looks great. I’ll spread the blanket close under the tree,” I reply, unfolding the blanket and laying it on the grassy spot while Sam puts the bag of food next to us. When I find a spot on the blanket and Sam joins me, I dig through the bag, noticing he did not bring those nasty Cheetos. “Okay, we have potato chips, dip, carrot sticks, Oreos, and strawberries, along with two large bottles of water. This is quite a feast,” I say, taking a bite of a strawberry. Sam watches as the juice from the strawberry runs down my chin, looking as though he wants to devour me and before I have a chance to wipe it away. He leans over, licking the juice, and then his lips are on mine in a slow passionate kiss. As he lays me back on the blanket, I wrap my arms around him, pulling him closely to me. Quickly something in us switched, and our emotions were like fireworks while our hands roam desperately and quickly over each other’s bodies.

Sam pulls away and gazes into my eyes as his hand caresses my thigh. His hand moves slowly upward, under my sundress, until it reaches the top of my thigh and over my panties. I gasp as Sam uses his finger to push them aside. We keep our eyes fixed on one another and his fingers find my wet opening. I bring my knees up and spread my legs open while I close my eyes and I tilt my head back, moaning with satisfaction. Working two fingers deep inside me, he leans down, kissing my neck, and I grip his hair as I reach my release. When I open my eyes, Sam is smiling, and he leans his forehead against mine.

“God, you’re so beautiful, Maggie,” he murmurs into my neck, “so incredibly beautiful.”

I take Sam’s face in my hands and look into his eyes.

“Sam, you’re so wonderful, so amazing, and I’m so afraid for this moment to end. I don’t want to ever lose this feeling.” We make love under that tree twice that afternoon and if there’s only one memory I could hope to remember, it’s that one.

Twelve hours later I’m frantically rushing through the room to gather my stuff together. I check and recheck every room and drawer to make sure I haven’t left anything. We had planned to be up earlier so we can pick up my car early and get on the road, but we were enjoying our time together so much we decided to sleep in. Sam and I finally agree to split the bill for the room after a long discussion and we walk to Murphy’s. I hand Doug my credit card as Sam loads our things in the car and pulls to the front. I get into the passenger side and fasten my seat belt. When I look over at Sam, he gives me a wink and squeezes my hand. We wave to Doug and Sam pulls out onto the main street and we travel back the way we came just so we can see the spot where Sam and I met. Sam slows down as we pass by, and it seems as if it was years ago instead of days. I turn my head quickly when he sees the tears forming, and I push him away when he teases me for being so sentimental.

Once we are on the interstate, the miles start to pass by quickly. We argue over the radio stations and when to stop for bathroom breaks. He gives me his political views while I keep my mouth shut. The more we learned about one another, the harder it was going to be to say goodbye.

“I’m hungry,” Sam says, pointing to a McDonald’s.

“Ooh yes, let’s stop,” I tell him, and we exit.

The sign says Joliet, which means we are getting very close where Sam and I will go our separate ways. At times I have a crazy feeling that we will drive straight past Chicago, that he might say, “Just keep driving. Wherever we end up is fine as long as were together.” But I know that will never happen.

“I’ll have a Big Mac,” Sam tells the cashier and I order the chicken wrap. We share a large order of fries and argue over the amount of salt he sprinkles on them.

“Do you have the address for your cousin’s place?” I ask, munching on a fry.

“Well, I have it, but I’m going to stay in a motel that’s close to the bar for a few days until my apartment is ready. I do have the directions there.” Sam hands me a sheet of paper.

We get into Chicago at 7:19 p.m. I will always remember the time because that’s when I had to say goodbye to Sam. The closer we got into the city, the more my heart tore, little by little. I wanted so badly to ask him to come with me, stay with me, but I know Sam was following his dream too and I couldn’t take that away from him. We pull up to a small motel located on a busy street, people were everywhere. Sam gets out first and I freeze; I can’t catch my breath as the tears fall fast. I can see Sam out of the corner of my eye with his backpack and guitar, standing by my door, waiting for me to open it. He kneels down and looks through the window at me and I slowly shake my head. When he sees that I am crying, he opens the door and grabs me, holding me almost as tight as I’m holding him. I know if I look up at him it will kill me.

I can feel his warm breath on my neck as he softly speaks. “Oh, Maggie, baby, don’t do this. Please don’t cry.” He pulls back to look at me. “I’m so sorry we have to say goodbye.” As we stand on the sidewalk in front of the motel, Sam stands in front of me. He takes my face in his hands and softly kisses me. I can taste the salt from my tears as they run down my cheeks.

“Maggie, don’t ever stop chasing your dreams. Chase them until you’re breathless.” I lean up and kiss him one last time.

“You have my number, right?” I barely squeak out, stepping back.

“Yes, I wrote it down and I put it in my guitar case. As soon as I get a cell phone. I’ll call you,” he promises. We both stand there just looking into each other’s eyes as if daring the other person to be the first to walk away. I close my eyes and turn quickly, sliding into the driver’s seat. When I pull away from the curb, I see Sam wave, walking into the motel lobby and my heart aches from the thought of never seeing him again.

AS I CROSS over the New Jersey state line, fourteen hours after I said goodbye to Sam, I feel as if the numbness is going away and I can breathe better. I can feel the excitement as I cross through the Holland Tunnel and I check the GPS for directions to Metro Leasing. I wish I had stopped earlier to clean up after driving straight through, but I was too excited to see my new place. I find the leasing office easily, but finding a parking place proved to be a bigger challenge, so I place a call to Marissa’s office as I walk through the busy streets. When she answers I let her know I’m on my way, after parking two blocks away.