Moonstone (15 page)

“Anyone wearing flannel probably won’t be my type,” Joy said.

“Lucky for me you prefer lipstick. So I’ll see you at eight?”

“I’ll be there.”

Joy stared at the phone when Vanessa’s line clicked. Another swimmer came into the locker room, and Joy set the phone down and hurried to dress.

Vanessa opened the apartment door wearing a bathrobe. She bit a chocolate truffle in half and placed the second half in Joy’s mouth, then handed her a glass of red wine.

“Go slow. It’s expensive and there’s only that one glass left. You can thank T when we see her tonight. We got in a fight and she left in a mood.”

T was short for Tina. Joy knew the wine meant Tina had been staying with Vanessa. Tina and Vanessa had been lovers in the past. She’d met Tina and hadn’t been impressed. She always seemed to be angry. It was difficult to decide if Tina was angry at the world or angry at someone in particular. She wondered what Vanessa saw in her.

“Let me guess. Tina doesn’t like the idea that I’m your date tonight?”

“You know T. She doesn’t like any ideas that aren’t her own. She says you don’t deserve a hot Latina lover.” Vanessa laughed.

“And what do you think?” Joy asked.

Vanessa arched her eyebrow. “Come here. I’ve missed you.” Vanessa’s bathrobe fell open as she pulled Joy toward her. She wasn’t wearing anything under the robe except red silk panties.

Chocolate cake served as dinner and it was after ten before they’d left the apartment. Joy tried to convince Vanessa that the club opening wasn’t worth leaving the house for, but she knew she’d lost the battle when Vanessa pulled out the outfit she’d planned on wearing. It wasn’t hard to forget why Vanessa had won her over their first night together. But as Vanessa tugged her to the door, she finally understood the reason their dating wasn’t meant for long term.
Priorities
. She heard the word in her father’s voice and felt foolish for thinking of it now. Vanessa shook her head when Joy lingered too long in the doorway.

“Come on, sleepyhead. There’s more to life than sex.”

Joy nearly laughed at the irony. She let Vanessa lead the way to the car and didn’t complain when Vanessa tossed her the keys. She was in no mood for drinking. “I think I’m too old to be going out after ten,” Joy said. She stifled a yawn.

Vanessa shook her head and leaned across the car console. “I’ll make it up to you later.”

As promised, the club was filled with plenty of hot women. But it wasn’t the women kissing in the club entryway that filled her with a buzz. It was the simple fact that there were women of color everywhere she looked. And they were here to be with other women. Raceda was an island and she’d suddenly landed back on the mainland. This was normal here. And
this
was everything Raceda wasn’t. Vanessa waved her hand in front of Joy’s face. “Drinks first?”

“What would you like?” Joy was tall enough to catch a bartender’s attention and she didn’t mind pushing her way to the front. Vanessa tried to hand her a twenty but Joy pushed the money away. “Red Bull and vodka?”

“You remember.” Vanessa smiled.

Joy ordered a club soda for herself and after a long wait, finally had the two drinks in hand and went looking for Vanessa. She found her in a familiar group. Tina was there along with two other women. Tina had passed something to one of the women and Joy watched her swallow it. Probably ecstasy. The only fight Joy and Vanessa had ever gotten into was over this. Joy waited by the bar, the sick feeling clenching her stomach. Tina was holding something out for Vanessa to take. Vanessa pushed Tina’s hand away and Tina made an exaggerated shrug. She laughed with the other two women and popped whatever it was in her mouth.

Joy walked up to the group then. She handed Vanessa her drink and sipped her own club soda. Tina’s glare was impossible to ignore. Joy smiled. Same old Tina. She wanted to flip her off but instead she only sipped her soda and held Tina’s icy stare. She turned to watch the dancers on stage when Tina started talking. Something about a party they’d all gone to the night before and the new sex partners that had come of it. Vanessa’s friends all seemed to be in open relationships. Which, Vanessa insisted, was different than being single.

Joy reached for Vanessa’s hand. “Want to dance?”

Vanessa winked at her friends and set down her drink. They moved to the dance floor and Vanessa leaned close to say, “So, who are you checking out?”

“No one.” Joy’s eyes locked on Vanessa’s, acutely aware that she had, in fact, been checking out more than one woman. She added, “No one in particular. It’s just nice to see so many queer women…”

“So many women, so little time,” Vanessa teased.

“It’s not that.”

“Finding it hard to be gay in Raceda?” Vanessa paused. “Or hard to be gay and black?” Vanessa’s eyebrows arched and she laughed. Then she shifted closer and pressed her body against Joy’s. “It’s nice having you back.”

“I don’t see many people like me in Raceda,” Joy said. She glanced at the dancers. “But I feel old in this crowd. Everyone’s in their twenties.”

Vanessa placed her hands on Joy’s cheeks and turned her face to meet her lips. She pulled away and said, “And they’re all wishing you’d asked them to dance. Too bad for them.” Vanessa’s lips pressed into Joy’s again. “You’re mine tonight.”

Joy forgot about the crowd. Or that she didn’t feel like she belonged in the one place she fit in. She could be black. She could be gay. And the only stares she got were from interested women. But something wasn’t right. Maybe she was suddenly too old. Maybe San Francisco was suddenly too cool for the girl from Raceda. The dance floor seemed to move around her. She could have been in the ocean trying to swim, her body limp, carried only by the surging tide. When the other dancers pushed against her, she gave and when they pulled away, she followed. She didn’t try to resist.

She knew this scene, this moment, this crowd—all of it had been familiar and comfortable. But not anymore. She watched Vanessa. Her eyes were closed and her face was upturned to the sparkling lights. She swayed to the music while the mirror ball played tricks on her skin.

“Barb’s in the shower,” Kelsey said. “Nice plant.”

Denise held up a terra-cotta pot full of lavender. “I hope Barb likes it. She keeps talking about getting something for the balcony.”

It was a good excuse. There was only one balcony—off the master bedroom. Barb’s bedroom. It was the only spot with an ocean view. On clear days, the entire length of the crescent-shaped bay could be seen. “The plant will have a nice view,” Kelsey agreed.

“No kidding. I told Barb we ought to get a table and chair set out there so there’s a place to sit.”

We.
Kelsey wanted to break the news to Denise right then and there. Barb was using her. But she only held open the door and waited for Denise to come in. “As fair warning, it’s my turn to make dinner.”

“I used to be a terrible cook,” Denise admitted. “Then I discovered the Cooking Channel.”

“Maybe you can help me with the peanut sauce then.”

“I’ll take a shot,” Denise said. She headed down the hall toward the kitchen.

Kelsey hesitated in the entryway, one hand still on the door handle. A silver Mercedes caught her eye. The driver slowed as it passed Kelsey’s car but then sped down the street. Kelsey cursed and slammed the door.

“Everything okay?” Denise asked from the kitchen.

“Yeah. I stubbed my toe.” If only Hannah had tried this hard to get her attention a year ago. Kelsey headed to the kitchen. It was Saturday night and she was spending the evening home. She wasn’t sure if it bothered her more that she had a crazy ex who was stalking her or that she was a third wheel on a Saturday night.

Denise dipped a fork into the peanut sauce. Her face scrunched up as she tasted it. “How much lemon did you put in this?”

“A lot,” Kelsey said. “I knew it was missing something but I couldn’t tell what. So I kept adding lemon.”

Denise barely held back her grin. “Why don’t we put this one aside and I’ll teach you the fail-safe, not-too-spicy peanut sauce recipe that I use.”

Kelsey took the bowl of peanut sauce and tossed it in the sink. “I hate starting over.”

Denise opened her mouth to say something but then paused. She stared at Kelsey for a long moment before saying, “It gets even harder the older you get.” She reached for the peanut butter and found a bottle of teriyaki sauce in the fridge. “Give yourself some time. At least a year.”

“How long has it been for you?” Kelsey didn’t know anything about Denise’s past. But by her sudden somber expression, she was certain there was a story.

“Almost two years. I feel like I’ve been stuck in limbo. Marty and I were together for twenty years. She was the only person I’ve ever been in love with…Your mom asked me to go bowling one night a few months after Marty moved out. You know, way back, your mom and I were on a competition league. We made some money—not much—but it was fun. When Barb asked me to join the new league that was starting up, I figured I didn’t have anything to lose. I always knew your mom wasn’t interested in anything more than being friends. And bowling. But I decided that was what I needed.”

“Bowling?” Kelsey suddenly felt as if the room had more air to breath. Denise wasn’t smitten with Barb at all. They were using each other—and both in limbo. For Barb, though, the idea of starting over had stalled out over a decade ago.

“I’m hooked. Your mom is in charge of our league now. We don’t play for money but she’s good. You should come see one of our games.” Denise handed a measuring cup to Kelsey. “Measure out a quarter cup of peanut butter. We’re going to make the cheater peanut sauce first. Two parts teriyaki and one part peanut butter. Then I’ll whip up the good stuff and you can compare.” She paused. “I’m not over Marty yet. And the idea of starting over terrifies me.”

“We probably both need to be out on the town with dates tonight. Getting over being terrified.”

Denise shook her head. “I’d rather stay in and make peanut sauce.”

Kelsey smiled. “Me too.”

Denise went to get a glass of water. “I’ve got good news for you.”

“What’s that?”

“Guess who’s ready to sign up for Alpine?”

“Joy got the loan? I mean, Dr. Henderson?”

“We talked about it last night. Everything’s set with the bank. I tried to convince her to call you last night, but it was late by the time we closed and she didn’t want to bother you.”

“Bother me? Seriously?”

Denise shrugged. “That’s Joy.” Denise continued, “I can’t wait to be paperless. Joy’s worrying about the money, but I’m like a kid waiting for Christmas. And I guess I can count on her sticking around Raceda now until we’re showing a good profit. Not much job security but…”

Barb walked into the kitchen and peered into the bowl Denise held. “What are you two making?”

“Denise is rescuing dinner. Spicy peanut sauce. The chicken and the veggies are ready for the frying pan, but I needed help with the sauce.”

“Sounds delicious.”

“What’s this I hear about job security?” Barb asked. “Did Joy get the loan?”

Denise nodded. “So I’ve still got a job for at least a year.”

Barb continued, “Kelsey, weren’t you and Joy friends in high school? Maybe you two can rekindle a friendship. You could use some friends yourself and maybe she’d stick around longer than a year if she wasn’t lonely.”

“I don’t think Joy’s issue with Raceda has anything to do with being lonely. She’s too busy to be lonely,” Denise said.

Kelsey nearly admitted that a person could be very busy and still lonely, but she didn’t want the look of pity that would follow. “She was a loner in high school. We were almost friends…but I hung out with assholes then. I don’t think she wanted anything to do with my group of friends.”

Barb shrugged. “Well, you don’t hang out with anyone now.”

“Thanks, Mom,” Kelsey said.

“It’s true. You need a friend. Not a girlfriend, a friend. Joy might be perfect for you.”

Kelsey wasn’t interested in a friendship. “Is she single?”

Denise squinted at Kelsey. “Why?”

Because she was just as attracted to Joy now as she was in high school. Maybe more so. Barb and Denise were both staring at her, and she knew all the questions that would follow if she admitted the truth. “It’s hard being a single professional in Raceda. With or without friends. There’s not much of a dating pool and the night life is nonexistent—especially compared to the city.”

“She’s mentioned a friend in San Francisco a couple times. But I’m not sure if it’s a friend or a girlfriend.”

“I wonder how serious it is.”

“I’m sure you’re a better catch.” Denise winked.

“That wasn’t what I was saying.”

“Is everyone a lesbian these days?” Barb asked. “It’s like a new fad. I feel like I should try it out sometime. Like the elliptical at the gym. For some reason, though, I always stick to the treadmill.”

Denise laughed and Barb continued, “Speaking of that, Nate called last night.”

“Speaking of what?” Kelsey said. “No way is Nate gay.”

“Maybe he’s using the elliptical,” Denise added.

“Of course not.” Barb shook her head. “He hates the gym.”

Denise searched the spice cabinet and pulled out the ginger. She tossed it to Kelsey. “One teaspoon.”

Kelsey wondered what she was possibly thinking after Barb’s admission. Barb enjoyed getting a reaction. It was hard to tell how serious she was, if at all.

“Nate’s thinking of coming home in July. Summer’s already too hot in Baja,” Barb added.

The house would be crowded with Nate home. Kelsey knew her mom would insist they’d have plenty of room, but getting her own place had been on her list since she’d started at Alpine. “It’ll be nice to see him. I can’t remember the last time we all were together.”

“Christmas two years ago,” Barb answered. “Hannah was so drunk she set the tablecloth on fire. Nate broke your grandma’s glass pitcher putting out the flames.”

“Oh that. Somehow I’d forgotten about that night…Sorry about the pitcher.”

“I never liked it anyway.” Barb hesitated. “But that dark green tablecloth was a favorite.”