Moving On Without You
Read Moving On Without You Online
Authors: Kiarah Whitehead
Moving On
Moving On Without You
1st Edition
Copyright 2014 Kiarah
Whitehead
Published by Kiarah
Whitehead / Kiarah Publishing
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
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Friday nights always
sucked. They were when every girl went out on dates with their boyfriends.
Tracy couldn't go out on dates because her mother would never allow it. There
was no boyfriend to speak of either. Quite a few guys had approached her this
summer, but no one was ever worth her time or energy. Sleeping in, watching
television, and talking on the phone were the only activities
worthwhile―well until her girlfriends started going on and on about their
boyfriends. Then it was time to hang up.
Devon was out with his girlfriend he had met two
months before. The two of them were inseparable since the day they met and
being around them made Tracy sick. She could not understand how two people who
didn't even know each other just three months ago could be so infatuated. They
lived right around the corner from each other and spent every possible hour
together until it was time to go to bed which forced them to retreat to their
respective residences.
Keisha had a boyfriend as well. She lived next
door to him and Tracy was not sure how long the romance could possibly last.
Anyone in that close of proximity to their lover could not be taken seriously.
They snuck in and out of each other's windows when their parents weren't
looking and attempted to keep the relationship a secret. The heavy petting had
been going on for a few weeks but couldn't possibly last past the summer.
Chloe was still single, but she had a date just
about every week. In addition to that, she lived so far from Tracy that they
couldn't have a functional friendship over the summer anyway. Neither of the
two of them had cars or licenses. This left them stuck on two different sides
of town seeing each other only once or twice since finals.
Tons of movies were on television keeping Tracy
from losing too much of her mind. She was grateful that her mother did not sign
her up for camp this year. Relaxing for a stretch was exactly what Tracy needed
to regroup after the previous school year's events. The boredom was beginning
to agitate her though.
She had no purpose during the summer months. There
was only so much sleeping one person could do. Getting a job may have been a
good idea, but it was hard to find a job that would hire a fifteen year old.
Tracy had gone to get her work permit two summers before but had not used it
once. Her laziness usually got the best of her. Working so hard on schoolwork
made up for her lackadaisical attitude in the summer. Her mother didn't make a
huge fuss about it unless Tracy asked for anything out of the ordinary. Then, she
reverted to her soapbox until Tracy's eyes glazed over.
Sean didn't have anybody in his life which made
him the perfect phone buddy. Tracy talked to Sean every day that summer. He
always had a ridiculous story to take her mind off of her own life. They didn't
live too far from each other which meant they could convince their mothers to
transport them back and forth to see each other at least once a week. When they
both ended up at their grandmother's houses they would meet up and hang out.
It was almost ninety degrees and the two of them
couldn't stand the heat any longer. They decided to walk to the corner store
for ice cream bars. They turned the corner walking past a crew of guys standing
against the brick wall and entered the store.
Sean took his time selecting his ice cream cone
while Tracy went up to pay for her bar and a few other snacks. The clerk
stuffed their purchases in two paper bags and studied the children until they
exited the establishment.
"I hate when he stares at me like that,"
Tracy said.
"Yeah. I'm gonna stop going in that store. He
makes me sick. He acts like I'm wanna steal something from out of there."
"I know."
"Hey, lady."
A tall guy ran to catch up to Tracy before she
crossed the street.
"Hi."
"How are you today?"
"Fine."
"What's your name?"
"Tracy."
"I had to come over here and tell you that
you're fine, but you probably already knew that huh?"
Tracy smiled and stopped to listen him.
"Thanks."
"I'm Terry. I think I've seen you
around."
"Yeah, I go to Jefferson."
"Oh okay. You're a senior?"
"Next year."
Tracy lied. She was not sure why, but he seemed
like he was too old for her.
"Tracy."
Sean was getting impatient, forcing her to end the
conversation pre-maturely. She wanted to get to know the guy, but she was too
shy to make the move in front of her friend.
"I gotta go."
Tracy shrugged and walked up to join Sean.
"Bye, slim."
Terry was undeniably attractive—almost too
attractive—but she did not want to put too much thought into the random
meeting. A lot of guys were interested in Tracy, but most of them did not
follow up with a serious pursuit. They made cat-calls in front of their friends,
but they did not make a real effort to chase her. It was a game the boys played
to impress their friends, but Tracy was not interested in games.
Kids were running down the block playing
basketball. The portable hoop was stationed adjacent to one of the neighbors'
driveways facing the narrow street. It seemed impossibly high for some of the
kids and the street wasn't wide enough to be a court, but this was their way of
keeping the driveway open for cars. The children ran back and forth stealing
the ball and pitching shots until cars honked for a path.
Sean's grandmother's home was a few houses down.
That was one place that Tracy spent a lot of her time as of late. Sean had
become very close to Tracy and it was hard to imagine that just a year ago they
weren't even speaking. Friendship had begun to take a backseat when
relationships started developing and love became a priority. When the carpet
was snatched from beneath her and all she had left was Sean, it was like her
eyes opened for the first time. It was a good thing he hadn't left her behind
as well.
The weekend was going to be a long one because she
was staying at her grandmother's house while her mother was out of town on a
cruise. The trip was meant to be a getaway which meant Tracy was not invited
and she could not be trusted in the house alone. Betty's house was boring. She
had cancelled her cable subscription and all her movies were outdated. Phone
calls were limited because she called her friends as long as she was awake.
Tracy caught up with Sean whenever she could, but made she made sure to come
home before the streetlights came on. The nights were long because nothing came
on during prime-time and basic channels reverted to syndicated sit-com reruns.
Time seemed to stand still waiting for her mother to get back off that plane.
Tracy went to the corner store to get a break. It
was nice to just take a walk and show off her outfit. Nobody had really seen
any of her summer clothes since she was cooped up in the house most of the
time. Once outside she realized how humid it had become and made a point to get
back inside as soon as possible.
Trying to walk without breaking a sweat was
exhausting and her thighs were sticking together less than halfway to the
store. She walked with her head high until a few men entered her peripheral.
Her eyes shifted to the passing cars and then the pavement, then the steps
leading into the store. The eyes focused on her were distracting, but it was
important not to lose focus of the current goal―get in and out of the
store as quickly as possible without engaging in any conversation. The men
hissed at her intolerance, but she refused to give in. Halfway down the chip
aisle she squatted to choose her favorite snack bags.
"Hey."
The dark jeans were distracting her from her hunt.
"Hi."
She looked up to see the guy she had met a few
days before.
"Oh god," she said.
"I knew you'd remember me."
"Yeah, I remember you."
"So how you been?"
"Fine."
"I can see that."
It was shocking to see that his looks were not
exaggerated the last time they ran into each other. He was just as attractive
as the day before, frighteningly tall compared to her five foot five inch
frame, and filled with confidence.
"You buying a lot of snacks. You're not
afraid of ruining your figure?"
"No. Not really."
She put the junk food up on the counter and
grabbed a few candy bars and beef jerky. She was not making a second trip in
this heat. When she went into her pocket to pull out the cash her mother had
given her he motioned his hand to stop her.
"I got it," he said.
Tracy was not sure if she should allow him to pay.
She did not want to owe the stranger anything. Her thoughts weren't coming fast
enough because he had already paid and picked up the plastic bag.
"You didn't have to do that."
She took the bag back from him when they got to
the front of the store. His friends were preoccupied bidding on a dirt bike
down the block.
"I wanted to. You're too pretty to be paying
for stuff like that. . . .What you about to do?"
"I'm going back home. It's too hot out
here."
"Oh you can't take the heat?"
Tracy wondered how he was not burning up in the
denim jeans he was wearing. She had on nothing but a tank top and shorts and
felt like she would pass out. The spring water was the only thing keeping her
from falling to the ground. She wanted to stay and chat with Terry, but the
sweat forming all over her body was not going to be cute when it started
seeping through her clothes. It wouldn't take long to soak through the back of
her shirt.
"No, I'm about to die in a minute."
It was too hot to play this game.
"Let me get your number. I'll call you and we
can go out sometime. Get some ice cream, go to a movie. Some place that has air
conditioning?"
He smirked as if he was sure she'd say yes, but
Tracy wasn't entirely sure she could even get permission to leave the house.
Where would she tell her mother she was going? She could not resist that smile though.
"Sure."
She typed her home number into his phone and saved
it with her first name only. It probably wasn't the best idea considering Janet
was home more than Tracy was, but it was already done now.
"Alright. Imma call you."
"Okay. Bye."
Tracy turned to walk back to her grandmother's
swinging the plastic bag with each step. The sweat was trickling down her back
and she hoped it did not show. She felt his eyes, but did not want to turn
around to confirm. After a few blocks it was safe to cross the street and
glance back, but he was no longer there. It was hard to believe a guy like that
was giving her the time of day, but her negative ideas could not ruin this
moment yet.
Terry had been calling every night at nine thirty
to check on Tracy. She told him she was usually home by nine o'clock and he
could catch her then. The truth was it was the time that her mother usually
left for work and from then until seven in the morning, Tracy had the house to
herself. Terry had never called on a weekend, but that was because he was too
busy hanging out with his own friends and family.
Tonight Terry had convinced Tracy to let him come
over and have their nightly conversation in person. Not wanting to make things
difficult, she agreed that he could visit. It couldn't be determined how far
the relationship would go, but the journey was still interesting enough to keep
up the pursuit.
Terry arrived a few minutes after Tracy left the
shower. She was dressed in sweatpants and a tee shirt. Feeling plain but there
was no time to properly plan a real outfit. The request had come at the last
minute and not being fully prepared she invited him over. No guy had ever been
in her home this late at night. Sneaking out was one thing, but bringing
someone in was a whole new ballgame.
Her nerves were heightened the entire time he was
there. Paranoia got the best of her and every sound was assumed to be her
mother. Tracy and Terry still had not discussed the status of their
relationship and Tracy was too intimidated to ask. She did not know if he would
think she was childish or simple and this made her keep her thoughts to
herself. Tracy stared at the television until her nerves took over. Retreating
to the kitchen allowed her to catch her breath and gather her thoughts.
The guy had not tried to kiss her or pressure her
in any way. There was no reason to be afraid. She had spoken to Terry ten times
on the phone and he was normal enough. He must have thought she was a freak. She
took a deep breath and headed back to the living room. With two glasses of
water in hand she returned to the opposite end of the couch.
"Thanks." He smiled sweetly.
This was the most innocent she had ever seen him
look. It was only the third time she had seen him in person. Tracy let her
guard down and leaned on his shoulder to watch the starting credits to a movie.
He rested his arm on hers. The two sat quietly as the movie played and he did
not ask her for anything. It surprised her that he didn't seem to expect
anything from her. She almost felt comfortable in his presence.
Terry picked Tracy up the following night to take
her to a movie. He had a nice silver sports car that looked brand new. He
insisted that it wasn't. No one else Tracy knew had a car that expensive
besides her father. She felt like an adult stepping into the passenger seat
with this guy.
They rode around for a while until Terry pulled
into an unfamiliar parking lot. Tracy had never been to this movie theater. It
was pretty far from where she lived, but she did not question it. She hopped
out of the car and followed her date inside.
Sitting in the theater waiting for the movie to
start reminded her of her first date. Tracy tried to push the thoughts of Max
out of her head. He hadn't called her in months and it was a stupid fantasy to
hold on to. Max wasn't coming back.