Authors: Mikael Aizen
Tim tapped his own nose.
"It's a surprise."
"Where are we going?" Kyle insisted, sitting up and staring at the road signs for a clue.
No need to panic.
Tim took his eyes from the road and glanced at Kyle.
"School that bad?"
Kyle held his breath and made himself sit back again.
"Stop asking me questions."
Tim grunted.
"Your Mom's on a business trip and I want to show you something.
You'll like it, I promise."
Kyle tried to pretend he was OK with being taken somewhere secret, someplace that Tim promised would be a good surprise.
But he wasn't.
Not even close.
He wasn't OK with
anything
that had happened to him.
He wasn't OK with the fact that he couldn't tell anyone what had happened.
What he'd done.
What he'd had to do so many times.
It felt like a dream most the time, but it wasn't.
Kyle knew what he'd done and he knew the decisions he'd made.
And he kept it all inside where no one else could see it.
"You shouldn't pretend so much," Tim said after a while.
Kyle stared at him.
"Talk to us.
Tell us what happened.
You can trust us, we're your parents."
Tim pushed the button and turned the car off.
Kyle didn't move.
Part of him was afraid of what he'd see outside.
That he'd be somewhere secret, a hidden place where he would be forced to kill other boys to survive, again.
Except this time it'd be Tim doing this to him and not some kids with a sack and a truck.
"Nothing happened," Kyle said.
Tim sighed.
A big, long, deep.
Sigh.
"Kyle, you haven't been the same.
Every day you worry us more.
We're so happy you're back but you're not the same kid we fell in love with."
Kyle didn't answer.
Until he did.
"Del, not you.
You never loved me."
"That's not fair."
Kyle shrugged.
"She cries you know," Tim said, letting the matter drop.
"Every night she cries.
She blames herself.
When you disappeared, she called everybody, did everything, never stopped and never slept trying to find you.
And after we found you she still feels like she failed because she was too late to save you because...because we
know
Kyle.
We see it in your eyes.
Something happened to you that was horrible and frightening."
Tim's fingers tapped at the wheel steadily.
"Let us help you.
Talk to us and we can get through this."
Kyle pulled the lever by his chair, his seat pulled him to sit straight.
He looked around.
"Why are we here?"
They were at the lake where the blood testing trailer had been close to.
Where he'd seen Callie and where he'd killed his first.
Jeff.
Then Kyle saw his answer.
Callie was here.
She was standing by the lake on the trail where they'd walked hand in hand together, happy.
She was wearing a white skirt today with a red bow around her waist.
And she was smiling at Kyle.
Tim leaned back in his seat and threw his hands behind his neck.
"I'll wait here.
We'll talk afterward."
He closed his eyes with a contented smirk.
Kyle opened the door and got out.
And walked up to Callie.
And looked at her quietly.
She threw herself on him.
Her arms wrapped around his neck and Kyle tensed, and relaxed.
"Hi Callie," he said.
"Kyle."
She leveraged herself off of him and stood back like she was embarrassed.
She crossed her arms as she looked at him.
He looked right back.
A serene moment passed as he gazed into her water-green eyes.
She was happy to see him, and she wasn't afraid of him.
Just happy.
It felt so strange that he looked away at the lake instead.
"It was an accident," he said.
"I know," she held out a hand.
"I thought about it and I knew that you were too nice to kill anybody on purpose."
He hesitated before he took her outstretched hand.
"I thought you'd blame me."
They started walking around the lake like they had the first time.
"I did sometimes," she said.
"But I'm OK now."
He hadn't know what reaction he'd expected from her, but whatever he'd dreamed would've happened--this felt better.
"I thought I saw you with Tim last time," Kyle said.
She looked at him and then looked down.
"I got scared.
You're very unlucky you know."
Kyle nodded.
"I know."
"You've been gone from school for a long time."
"Yeah."
"What happened?
Where were you?"
"I'd rather not talk about it," he replied.
He didn't, he really didn't.
He didn't want to think about it either.
All he wanted to do was pretend that it never happened.
"Kyle," she chided, still walking.
Their hands had begun to swing back and forth between them.
"If we're gonna be friends, we're going to have to share and be honest with each other.
And if we're gonna get married someday, we'll have to be extra honest."
Huh?
He let go of her hand.
"Married?
We're getting married?"
Callie put a finger by her lips.
"Maybe."
Then she laughed.
"But that's later.
We have to be good friends first."
"Callie..."
She interrupted him.
"I know coming back is hard, and falling back another grade for missing three months of school is even harder.
I know you're being bullied by a bunch of kids and I know no one seems to like you or want you around.
I know you've had trouble talking to people since you've been back.
And I know you're sad."
It seemed like everyone knew things about him lately.
"You don't know anything, Callie.
No one does."
He rounded on her.
She gave him a frightened look.
He realized he had his fists up like he was going to hit her.
He put them down.
"I'm not a good person Callie, I'm not the kind of person you want to marry.
I'm not even the kind of person you want to be friends with."
She managed a smile, though she still looked scared.
"You're wrong.
You're the nicest..."
"Stop saying that!" he yelled.
"I killed Jeff, and he was only the first one.
I've killed plenty of people Callie!
Sixteen
so far.
And if you aren't careful, who knows?
Maybe I'll kill you too!"
"But you don't have..."
"Who cares if I have The Code?
I've killed.
Murdered.
They're dead and they're never coming back.
I'm only ten, and I've murdered almost twice as many people as my age.
What does that tell you, Callie?
WHAT?" Kyle screamed, unable to hold himself back.
His feelings were coming out in waves, strong feelings that he couldn't control.
And he directed them at her.
The frustration, the anger and guilt, the hate.
She looked scareder than he'd ever seen for a second, and then she looked mad.
Callie suddenly slapped him across the face.
"I don't care who you've killed, Kyle Alexander.
I don't believe any of them were your fault and I still want you as my friend.
But you have to want me as a friend too."
Kyle heard Tim's distant voice calling from the car.
"Hey!
You kids doing all right?"
Callie stood on her toes and waved.
"Yes, Mr. Alexander!"
She lifted her nose and jabbed a finger into his chest.
"I still think you're the nicest boy I've ever met."
"How can you say that?" Kyle asked.
"Didn't you hear me?"
"I heard you fine.
Now, hold my hand and walk with me."
She held her hand out again and stomped her foot with a determined expression.
...Kyle took her hand.
And just like that he felt like a stopper plugged up his feelings.
Anger, frustration and everything.
"Why are you being so nice to me?" he asked her.
"Because you were nice to me, first," she said confidently.
They walked around the quiet lake and for the first time in a long while Kyle felt good about himself.
The truth was that of the other kids that he'd killed, Kyle felt most guilty about Callie's brother.
Maybe because Jeff had been the only one that had been an accident.
The others...the others he'd killed for mercy or survival--when he hadn't had a choice, not a real choice.
And maybe because after Jeff, it hadn't been that hard.
Not really.
Or maybe.
Maybe because something had happened after they'd injected him with stuff and after he'd been fighting for a while.
Nothing he could be certain of, except that everything became easier.
To hurt, to fight, to kill.
He'd gotten stronger too--way stronger.
Not strong like a superhero, but strong like he was older than ten.
As strong as a teenager maybe.
Kinda like El--the boy that had been in Kyle's class with big looking muscles.
Except Kyle's muscles didn't look any different from before.
Kyle wondered if they'd injected The Code into him and given him The Code, kinda like a cold.
Maybe he could ask Tim to test him again, just in case.
Del wouldn't if he asked, he was sure of that.
"What about you?" he asked.
"What happened to you?
You were gone for a while, too."
"My family, we're traditional.
We went to bury my brother in the mountains in my parent's hometown."
She nodded as if to herself, saying the words in a weird monotone.
"And my parents got married again."
"I'm glad."
"You don't have to say that.
Not if you don't mean it."
"I mean it," Kyle said.
He was glad Callie's parents were doing well.
"It's because of you, you know.
My brother was the reason they split up in the first place.
Mom caught him hurting me, and dad didn't believe it.
Mom became sure Jeff would kill me someday, but dad insisted that since he didn't have The Code, it was impossible.
They fought and split apart."
She looked down and that odd sound in her voice plagued him.
But maybe it was Kyle.
He’d changed, everything seemed weird nowadays.
"That was just a month before Jeff died."
"Didn't you tell your dad?"
"No.
I thought it'd make things worse.
That they'd split up if I told them.
After they split anyway, Jeff promised he'd hurt me bad if I told dad, since dad was in charge of us most the time and he really liked Jeff.
He always would say that Jeff was the smart one."
"I'm sorry."
"It's better now, though," Callie said.
"I know you didn't mean to, but, it
is
better.
And you did it because you were brave and were trying to protect me.
That's how I know you're nice."