My Addiction: Second Chances Series (8 page)

She closed her eyes again, and I moved quickly to kiss her into submission. It didn’t take long before she wrapped her arms around my neck.

I didn’t waste time. I lifted her up and carried her into my bedroom. Once there, I took my time and unwrapped her from her clothes slowly. I would have preferred to do this with the lights on, but she wouldn’t let me.

“Can I take your clothes off?” she asked me softly.

I smiled, stood back and gave her permission without saying the words. I watched her intently, waiting for her hands to touch me skin to skin. I’ve craved for this moment for so long. You have no idea how good she makes me feel, but let me show you, just as I show her what she does to me.

I only wore a t-shirt and basketball shorts, so she gripped the bottom of my shirt and bunched it in her hands before she moved it up slowly past my torso. I helped her of course, and as I pulled my shirt over my head, her lips instantly went to my nipples lapping her tongue over me, sucking me. I closed my eyes as a flood of ecstasy overcame me, consumed me. I fisted her hair, getting impatient. I really wanted her.

“Remove my shorts,” I said, voice deep with need.

I licked my lips just as she continued to kiss down my torso at the same time, pulling my shorts down, freeing me.

I was hard as steel, and just as her hand gripped me, I could have lost it right then. She was so fucking sexy, and I missed seeing her on her knees in front of me. I missed her touch, and I missed…
ah
... that right there!

“Yes, baby, take all of me,” I told her, just as she took me into her mouth.

The sight of Ayana’s lips on me was enough for me to lose my mind. Watching me go in and out of her mouth was the most erotic and satisfying feeling I’ve had in a long time. She was skilled at giving me head. She knew exactly what I liked, what would drive me out of my mind. She proceeded to lick me from base to head, fluttering her tongue over the head of my cock. She then squeezed me tight and pumped as she moved me in and out of her beautiful supple lips.

The aggressive side of me was starting to take over, but then suddenly, when she looked up at me, something else happened. Something that I’d never in my life felt before. I frowned as I couldn’t understand what this feeling was, what it meant. All I know is one minute I was watching her on her knees as she gave the best blowjob I had in a long ass time to…

“Baby, get up.”

The shock was evident on her face.

Yeah, I’m shocked too.

She obeyed and as she stood, my hand still in her hair, I backed her up until the back of her legs hit the bed. I lifted her so she could wrap her legs around my waist, and I gently laid her on her back.

I didn’t move at that moment and neither did she. I just stared at her, trying to express to her what I wanted, but couldn’t say it.

She didn’t say anything either, which really confused the shit out of me.
Could she know what’s happening?

I moved my hand underneath my pillow and pulled out a condom. “Put it on,” I told her, voice raspy and full of need so desperate that I didn’t recognize my own voice.

She did as I asked and just as she moved her hand, I wasted no time and entered her warmth without hesitation.

We both moaned and I felt her move back slightly, trying to get used to me. I placed one arm underneath her so I could grip her shoulder and bring her body as close to me as I could.
Damn, she feels good.

I wanted to fuck her hard. I wanted to make her remember, to punish her for the past but instead I…

Shit, I went slow.

I moved in and out of her, dragging my cock over her most sensitive parts and bringing a slow climatic feeling through her body and, hell, through mine too. She moaned and said my name as I slowly, painfully moved in and out of her. Her body suddenly arched into me. I watched as she came, feeling her grip me tight, reminding me that her pussy was made for only me.

I watched her go through so many emotions; I felt them deep within me. I knew I was driving her out of her mind. I was getting the scars on my back to prove it, but I didn’t move faster. My hips went at a pace I couldn’t control. It was steady. It was glorious. It was heaven.

“Ayana, look at me,” I managed to croak.

When she opened her eyes, I started to move faster. It was something about her eyes, the need to please her, to see her desires drenched in them, but I saw something else too. I saw the same thing that was gripping my heart right now, causing me to not to be able to speak.

She placed her hands in my hair and gripped tight, keeping her eyes solely on me. It was that moment I knew what was happening. It was something that never happened before in my life. I…
Shit, is that what I’m doing?

Yes, it is… I started moving faster as I said it in my mind.

I’m making love for the first time in my life… Fuck.

“If you’re lucky enough to get a second chance, DON’T WASTE IT.” – Unknown Author

I slowly opened my eyes, disoriented at first ,just trying to figure out where I was, but as soon as I moved and felt the discomfort between my legs, I knew exactly where I was.

Oh shit!

I didn’t mean for this to happen – honest I didn’t. I mean, I tried to stop him. Okay, well, I asked him to stop, and I know it wasn’t too convincing. However, I spoke the words to him. But I knew the moment I saw that look in his eyes, there was no stopping him, and, quite honest, I didn’t want him to.

But now after the dust settled, after the most unbelievable sex of my life, I felt guilty. Brad was engaged just a week or so ago, and now I found myself in his bed, wrapped up in him again.

This can’t be good for me…

As I stared up at the ceiling, I started thinking about all the ways I fucked up and all the ways Lock was going to kill me.

“What’s wrong?”

I turned my head to my left to find a pair of eyes staring back at me. I looked back up at the ceiling, resolved to taking the easy way out.

“Nothing,” I answered.

I felt him move and his face came into view. Looking down on me, he caressed my cheek, brought his finger down and under my chin, and then moved my head back to him.

“I can hear your brain working overtime. Don’t tell me ‘
nothing
.’”

I sighed and sat up, bringing the sheet with me to cover up. The last thing I want is to tempt him, but, looking in his eyes, I knew it was a little too late for that.

So, I said bluntly, “I feel like shit.”

He frowned. “Why?”

My eyebrows rose in response. “Why? Seriously? Bradley, not a week ago, you were engaged. You were with someone else. And now you’re here with me? This can’t be good. I mean, you were in love …” I moved my eyes from his, not able to take the intensity I saw in them even through the darkness of this room.

Brad was having none of that and tilted my head back to him so my eyes were on his. “First of all, I told you she and I were over for a long time. We haven’t been intimate in months.”

I couldn’t help my shocked reaction and he just nodded. “Yeah, can you believe I went months without sex? It’s unheard of for me, as you know, but that’s what happened. And yes, I did work crazy hours, but when it comes to sex, I’m never that tired. So dispel that notion from your mind. Nora and I haven’t connected like that in a long time. As far as being engaged goes, I told you, we weren’t connecting in that aspect either. We were more roommates than anything else. We saw each other in passing and it wasn’t because both of us had jobs.”

He placed his hand to the side of my face. “You say I was in love… There was only one woman in my life that I’ve ever truly been in love with. I’m sure I don’t have to tell you who that woman was.”

I shook my head and closed my eyes. I smiled. I couldn’t help it. Being with him was something I’ve always wanted, but I messed up before. But damn it, I won’t mess up again. If he’s gives me any kind of chance, I’m going to take it.

Brad pulled me to him, and I kept my eyes closed as I felt his lips brush up against mine.
Oh, his lips are so powerful, so amazing.
I wanted more.

I let go of the sheet I held to my body and climbed in his lap without breaking the tight lip lock we had going on. Kissing him had always been taboo for me. I mean, I couldn’t just kiss this man without wanting to rip his clothes off him. I had to have him inside me, caressing me from the inside out.

I never felt this way for any man. If I could be completely honest, no man had ever gotten close enough to touch me either. I’d get sick to my stomach if another man touched me or kissed me, and, believe me, I’ve tried to move on. Maybe it’s psychological or maybe, again, I was just plain stupid. However, no one in this world could love me like Brad, and I wouldn’t settle.

Ever since I was thirteen, I felt I was made for only him. I know I shouldn’t be saving myself for a man that had moved on, that had all intentions of giving himself to someone else. Yet, I couldn’t help feeling the way I do.

“Where did you go?” he asked me quietly.

I touched his face, his lips with my fingers. I felt him between my legs and decided that moment I would fight for what I have deemed to be mine; whatever it takes. This is my second chance, and I’m going to take it.

“Ayana?” His brows furrowed, and I quickly shook my head. I reached underneath his pillow, pulled out another condom, and rolled it on him. I sat up on my knees, reached for him and slid down his shaft slowly. My confidence and power heighted when I saw how much I’d affected him.

I was still sore, mind you. I mean, I hadn’t had sex in over five years, but loving him was my drug, and I was so addicted.

I placed my hands on the sides of his face when I was completely filled with him. I uttered softly, my lips inches from his, “I’m right here. I didn’t go anywhere.”

Brad looked me in my eyes for a minute, then I felt his hands go right to my ass and he squeeze. “Then fuck me, baby.”

I rose up slowly, and then came down, making him gasp and squeeze my ass tighter.

I grinned. “Oh, I intend to…”

              ******             

I woke again, this time to my phone going off. I knew who it was instantly, and I groaned inwardly. Bradley was wrapped around me, and I couldn’t get my phone without waking him, so I waited until the buzzing stopped, and I slowly moved.

He moaned and said groggily, “What’s up?”

“I need to go…”

“Huh? Why?” he asked me as I stood to grab my panties and bra.

“For one, I’ve just had sex with you in Lock’s house. He’s going to kill me if he catches me here…”

“Don’t worry I’ll protect you.” He smiled at me all sleepy looking and sexy.

I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, that’s what I’m afraid of.” I moved close to him and kissed his cheek. “Go back to sleep. I’ll find my own way to the door.”

“No, let me walk you.”

I pushed him back down. “I’m cool. It’s not like Lock lives in the rough streets of West Plano. He’s in Frisco now.”

I felt him chuckle. “Call me and let me know you made it home safely.”

“I will.”

I kissed him again, got dressed as quickly as I could, grabbing a t-shirt of his since he ripped mine, and left. I decided to leave out the back just so I didn’t have to run into Lock.

I reached for my phone in my pocket and looked at the screen. Yup, it was Ramone Allen. I called him back and just as his gruff voice came over the line, I gagged, literally. I’m sorry, but just the thought of him makes me sick.

“Where the fuck are you?”

“Does it matter? What do you want?” I retorted.

He paused a beat, and I stood on the side of Lock’s house waiting. Finally, he said, “I need you tonight. Can you be at the spot in thirty?”

I groaned. “Are you serious? I thought this was my day off.”

“Day off? What do you think this is? You think you work on Wall Street or something? Get you sweet ass down here or consider the deal off,” he barked, then hung up.

Shit.

I hustled around the side of the house and just about made it to my car when I heard a nasty voice behind me say. “Is that how you treat my brother? Fuck him, then leave in the middle of the night? You couldn’t at least stay until morning? You haven’t changed at all.”

I turned to find Lock sitting on his porch. His eyes filled with judgment and anger. He stood and started for me, but I turned and headed for my car. I said over my shoulder, “I don’t have time for you. I need to be somewhere.”

“Oh yeah? Where? To go get high?” he laughed. “Popped any pills lately?”

“You’re an asshole, do you know that?” I turned and was about to go hard when I saw just a shell of a man standing in front of me. I was completely stunned. I mean Brad said Lock had taken MJ’s death hard, but I didn’t think it was that bad. He didn’t look this bad a week and a half ago, did he?

“Don’t get mad at me because you’re a junkie,” he said to me with venom etched in his voice.

I shook my head. “You know what? Fine. You want to do this now – let’s do it. Yes, I used prescription pills to numb the pain I had when my mom passed away; sue me. I made the wrong choice, but shit, I’m human and everyone makes mistakes. And, believe me, I’ve paid for them.”

“Is that your excuse? You chose to take drugs to numb the pain? You hurt the people that cared about you the most because you wanted to numb the pain? How selfish are you? Did you even think about how you affected anyone else?”

I moved closer to him. “Seriously? You’re standing in front of me preaching this sanctimonious bullshit to me about how selfish I am? How I didn’t care about hurting the people close to me? Have you looked at yourself in the mirror lately? So, yes, I didn’t think too highly of myself when I decided to self-medicate my pain. I messed up thinking I would only be causing myself pain instead of others, but shit… you are doing the exact same thing.”

He pointed down in my face. “Oh no. I’m not like you. I will not destroy myself, my life that way.”

I shook my head and pointed back at him. “What the hell do you think you’re doing now? You have become the biggest asshole known to man. You walk around here mad at the world, taking your misery and loneliness out on everyone around you. Did you think about Brad when you decided to become this shell of a man? Do you think about how he feels watching his older brother self-destruct from the inside out? You smell like shit, you look like you have skid marks in your damn tightie whities, your clothes and face look as if they haven’t seen soap and water in decades. So, yeah, I may have gone the wrong way with drugs, but you are right behind me, and you are so far in denial it’s sad. Why don’t you throw away the vodka you keep under your pillow that you drink every night, and take a fucking shower, or maybe two? Shave that nasty beard you have and join life.”

He turned beet red, and I knew he was about to explode from embarrassment, shock and fear. So I said quickly, “You think I don’t see the signs? You may not go to work drunk, but you come home and get drunk. I know what that’s like. Remember, I’m the junkie.” I pointed to myself, rolled my eyes and turned to walk away when he gripped my arm. He spun me and walked closer to me.

I looked up in his eyes and it broke my heart to see all the pain etched in them. He took a deep breath and said, “If you break him, it’s going to be you and me.”

I nodded and answered softly, “I know,” then walked away. I had less than fifteen minutes to get to where I needed to be.

Shit, I’m gonna be late.

*****

I arrived at the spot about ten minutes late. Oh well. I broke every law imaginable to get there, so if that’s not appreciated then too bad.

I grabbed my bag out of the trunk and headed for the entrance. As I got closer, the smell of urine, sweat and something very unpleasant attacked my senses. I hate this place.

I walked up to the back door and knocked. A very large, very black man opened it and looked me up and down. The look on his face always managed to scare the shit out of me. He would study me as if it was the first we’ve met, and we both knew damn well it wasn’t. This song and dance happened every time I came here before he would move to let me pass.

I walked through a dark and damp hallway in the back of the building with my hands deep in my pants pockets. The hallway of the building always seemed moist to me and that didn’t seem right. The walls of a building shouldn’t bleed or be moist all the time. It didn’t matter the time of the day, I learned; it was always like that. This place was nasty. To give you an idea of the nasty stuff that happens along the walls here, I just passed a girl pinned up against the wall, boobs out and bouncing as some gent that was screwing her. The look of boredom on her face was almost comical, sad but comical, especially when you see how hard this guy was working.

That wasn’t the first time I’d seen something like that happen here and it wouldn’t be the last. At any point of the day, you could see someone being screwed in the hallway or in either the men or women’s bathroom. Since this girl was out here, I only assume all the bathroom stalls were taken.

See what I mean?

I keep my hands to myself. There’s no telling what you could catch if you touched or leaned up against the walls here.

I found the steps I needed and descended to the basement where Mr. Allen met me. He paced impatiently, looking at his phone.

When he saw me coming toward him, he shook his head. “What the hell took you so long?”

“I’m sorry, okay? I got here as fast as I could,” I told him, and moved quickly past him to the changing rooms.

Just before I closed the door to get ready, he said, “You don’t have a lot of time in there, so hurry up.”

I just nodded my head, closed, and locked the door. I knew the door probably didn’t lock, and I bet you my life they had cameras in there. Therefore, I didn’t give them any type of show. I’ve mastered the art of getting undressed without showing a thing.

I grabbed my pair of gold booty cutting shorts and a long skirt. I put the skirt on over my shorts, removed them and my panties, then put my shorts on, thankful for the shower Brad and I took before we fell asleep. Brad’s t-shirt was huge on me so I was able to take off my bra and put on my gold sports bra looking thing that barely covered my boobs. I kept the shirt on though.