My Once and Future Love (46 page)

“I’m local this week.”

“Good.” He threaded his fingers through her
hair. “What brought on the change of color?” It was so soft, like
silk.

“I had a dream once about a makeover. Figured
my subconscious had a good idea.”

He smiled. “Explains the lack of glasses,
too. I’m glad you wore your hair down tonight. I wanted to pull the
pins out of those chignons all the time, see it tumble free.”

She bumped his shoulder, shaking her head.
“You just have librarian fantasies.”

He twirled a strand around his finger. “No, I
have Beth fantasies, and I’ve loved your hair since I was sixteen.”
He inhaled. “Still using the same conditioner.”

“Why change what works?” She was so close
now.

He closed the gap and kissed her. She moaned.
A second later, he had her on his lap. He wanted to drag out every
last second. Soon, they were panting, gulping in air between
feverish kisses. Her hands slid up his neck into his hair as they
devoured each other, him holding her flush against his body.

“I love the little sounds you make,” he said,
nibbling on her neck. He played with her earring with his tongue,
making her squirm.

“This isn’t slow.”

“Uh-huh.”

“I should go home,” she said.

He groaned, then held her at arm’s length.
She was a gorgeous vision, her hair mussed, lips swollen from
kisses, cheeks flushed, and eyes luminous in the moonlight.

“Are you sure?”

She nuzzled his cheek with her nose. “No.
God, I’ve missed you.”

“I love you, Beth.” It got easier each time
he said it.

She met his eyes. “I know.”

He wanted to hear her say it back, but he
could wait, at least for a night. “You’ll be my girl again?”

“Until you don’t want me.”

“Silly girl.” He slid his hand under the back
of her shirt, relearning her silky skin. “I’ll always want you.” He
found the
spot
on her neck and lightly bit down.

She sucked in a breath and squirmed. “Not
fair, Jacob.”

“All’s fair in love, baby. Come see my new
bed.” He stood, carrying her by a hand under each buttock.

She wrapped her legs around his waist to hold
on, just like he knew she would.

Chapter Thirteen

Being carried up these stairs gave me a sense
of déjà vu. The house was the same one from my coma-dream, though I
didn’t know how that was possible. The décor was different, of
course, but…

Jacob paused at the double doors to the
master bedroom. “I did do a little decorating besides putting a bed
in here.”

“Okay…”

He set me down and opened the doors. The
first set of pictures I sold were on his walls.

“It was you?”

"I didn't think you'd sell them to me if you
knew who wanted them," he said, turning to look at the framed
photographs on the walls. "They're really good, and you took them,
so..."

"How did you even know about the
showing?"

It was so surreal...

"Marty drove by and I saw your name on the
sign. I seriously doubted there were two Elizabeth Lawsons in L.A.
interested in photography, so... I had to support your work,
Bethie, like you did mine. The gallery gave you a good commission,
didn't they?" he asked, his tone threatening retribution if I'd
been treated unfairly.

"Yeah...yeah, it was very fair. Oh, my God,
Jacob! You've had these all this time and you never said? I'd frame
a photograph you liked for free. You didn't need to buy them."

He shrugged, walking over to look at the
print hanging above the bed. It focused on the adornments on an Art
Deco building in the city.

"If you'd rather they go to a collector, I'll
understand. I don't want you to doubt your talent."

"I don't...unless you bought all the
rest?"

He shook his head, smiling. "No, just these.
I've looked at them all, though."

“You’re amazing.”

“You supported me. I supported you.” He
wrapped his arms around me. “Please stay.”

I took a step back. “Sharing a bed isn’t
going slow. I don’t know how many more chances we’ll have if we
mess this up.”

“You have a point, but I have plenty of guest
bedrooms. I’m not tryin’ to be pushy, love, it’s just…it’s been so
long since we were honest and friendly at the same time I don’t
want the night to end.”

“That’s really sweet, but I should go
home.”

“Are you sure?” Kisses along my jaw made my
breath come quick. “There’s no rush…unless you have to work
tomorrow?”

“No…”

“Then talk to me. We have months to catch up
on.” He bit the
spot
on my neck again; I hissed.

“This isn’t talking.”

“Sure it is…you say words, I reply to
them…”

“Seducing me won’t help your case
tomorrow.”

He sighed, let me go, and nodded, then took
my hand. We left the bedroom and walked down to the garage. I
followed him to a black Mercedes. He opened my door first.

“Thanks.”

Once inside, his movements were casual, in no
hurry. Though the streets were deserted, he stuck to the speed
limit—a definite improvement. I remembered this route from the
dream, which was way trippy. Maybe I did cross into an alternate
universe for three days.

“Is your dad in town?” he asked.

“Why? Nervous?”

“Only if he knows our past.”

Scary thought. “He doesn’t. We’ve gotten
closer, but not
that
close. So, when you leave Friday, how
long will you be gone?”

“Not long. Then, we get most of October
off.”

“Wow, a whole month? What will you do with
yourself?”

“A few weeks, and I hope you’ll help me
figure that out,” he said with a smile.

“Yeah, we can hang out.”

Jacob pulled into the driveway next to my car
and cut the engine. “Are we really doing this?”

“What?”

“Dating again,” he said.

“Maybe… We could try being friends first. At
this point, it’s kind of like starting from scratch.”

His brows met in the middle. “What are you
saying, Beth?”

“Give me a little space. It’s late and you
sprung all this on me…I’m glad we talked, but I need to absorb
this. The summer was safe, you know, with e-mails and postcards,
and now you make with the big gestures…”

“I’m serious, Beth. When I got that call from
the hospital, everything stopped and all I could think about was
‘please don’t let her die’. You hurt me when you kicked me away,
but much as I wanted to stop loving you, I couldn’t…not completely.
Took a long time to figure that out and after repairing some of the
damage these past months--”

“I don’t work as fast as you do, Jacob.
Please, at least give me--”

“Okay. Can I call you, or take you out
tonight?”

“I’ll call you. Thanks for the ride home.” I
leaned over to kiss his cheek. He turned his face so we touched
lips again. “Goodnight, Jacob.”

I got out and shut the door before I changed
my mind. Two steps up the walk, I heard his door open.

“A gentleman escorts the lady to her
door.”

“Dragging out every second, aren’t you?”

“Didn’t I always?”

The porch light wasn’t on. I must’ve
forgotten to flip it on again when Celeste rushed me out the door.
“Well, goodnight. Again.”

He was too close in the dark. “Do I get a
goodnight kiss?”

“If I do that, I might invite you in.”

“I don’t see a problem with that.”

God, he smelled good. “Jacob…”

“Alright.” He backed up. “Call me tomorrow?
Please?”

I turned my key in the lock. “That pout
doesn’t work on me anymore. Go home!”

He smiled, undaunted, and walked backwards to
his car. Shaking my head, I went inside before I could get in
trouble. Only after the door was latched and both locks turned did
I relax, slowly exhaling.

This called for ice cream and my best friend.
Phone in one hand and Fudge Brownie in the other, I dialed her
cell.

“Mmm, yellow?”

“Are you alone?” I asked. “You usually don’t
answer the phone with color names.”

“Hold on.” There was the hum and murmur of
voices in the background, then I heard her breathe. “Okay, what’s
up?”

“Maybe I’ll call back in the morning.”

“No, no, I’m here for you. What happened with
Mr. Rich and Gorgeous?”

“We talked…”

“
And?
”

“He wants to get back together. Try again.
But you probably caught that at the limo.”

“That kiss was hot. Go on.”

“So…” I swallowed a bite of chocolate. “He
says he loves me.”

“Get out! He just broke into
declarations?”

“Not abruptly. We straightened some stuff
out. And there was more kissing.”

“How was it? Toe-curling, mind-bending,
panty-melting…?”

“Celeste!”

“Did you jump him?”

“No! Of course not!”

“Beth, come on. When are you going to find
better, huh? He’s seen you at your geekiest and still liked you.
He’s gorgeous, rich, and has a voice that makes all women quiver.
And he loves you even though you’re a stubborn know-it-all who
really needs to have more fun. Take the bull by the horns and claim
the man!”

“Whose side are you on? You don’t know him.
The public doesn’t know all his mistakes.”

“Yet you do and you’ve loved him since you
were still in a training bra. Don’t deny it. Sweetie, all your
excuses are just delaying the inevitable. You have to take a risk
some time or you’re going to end up alone.”

“Says the perpetual bachelorette.”

“Hey, I married my career, but I still don’t
sleep alone if I don’t want to. My way makes me happy. I just want
to see you happy, too.”

I knew she did. “I don’t know…what if I get
back in there and I’m just arm candy after a couple months? I
couldn’t take it if he got…bored or something.”

“You’re afraid of repeating the past.”

“
Yeah.
”

“Well, you’ll never know if you don’t give
him a chance to prove himself. You’ve said he’s been different
since your accident.”

“I hate it when you’re right.”

“I know,” she said merrily. “
Call
him
.”

“I’ll sleep on it.”

“
Beth…
”

“Thanks. Later!” I hung up before she could
argue and set the answering machine to pick up automatically. Yeah,
it was cowardly, but for now, I was okay with that.

The next day, Jacob sent flowers.
Lots
of flowers. It was flattering, but couldn’t he let a girl
breathe?

“Mr. Lindsey, please,” I requested over the
phone.

His PA ran interference. “Um, he’s busy at
the moment. If I could take a message--”

“He’s expecting my call. I know he’s
home.”

“Y-yes ma’am.”

Rolling my eyes, I waited. Good help was so
hard to find.

****

He took the phone handed to him. “Jake,
here.”

“Look, the roses are lovely, but please give
me some space, okay?”

“I’m so glad you called, love. I want
to--”

“Jacob, hush. I just wanted to tell you the
flowers aren’t necessary. They’re not helping.”

“Sorry. I just wanna…well, you know. Goin’
out of my mind, baby. I couldn’t sleep. Beth--”

“I know. I know. Be patient. Please? I will
call you, I promise.”

“Okay.”

“Alright. I’m going to hang up now.”

He put the phone down when he heard the
“click”. God, this was hard. Comforting and terrifying to put his
hear in Beth’s hands…even with the distance, the years, and all
that happened, he knew her, and giving her time to think could
easily backfire. She was like a skittish little rabbit, ready to
disappear into the underbrush at the speed of light.

****

Two days. I made lists and analyzed it to
death until there was nothing left to do but decide yes or no.
Locking myself in my room with the phone, I dialed Jacob’s
cell.

“Beth?” He picked up on the first ring.

Biting back a giggle, I asked, “Have you been
answering the phone like that every time it rings?”

“No…” Implying the opposite.

“I’m ready to meet somewhere.”

“How about my place?”

“No, um…some place neutral.”

“Okay…a restaurant or something?”

“The park near here. It should be pretty
empty this time of day. See you in twenty minutes.” Feeling safer
if I kept it short, I ended the call.

****

He remembered the park. She’d be waiting for
him on the swings. When his concentration failed during a study
session and he couldn't stay still any longer, she'd suggest a walk
to this park a block away from their houses and they'd sit on the
swings and sway while they talked. He scared her half to death many
times over by flipping off that swing.
He parked the car and put on the baseball cap he wore when trying
not to be recognized. The sun sat low enough not to shine over the
rooftops anymore, so he left his sunglasses inside. He smiled when
he saw her at full pump on the swing. She wore jeans, a suede
jacket, and her hair in a ponytail.
"Does it still feel like flying?"
"Find out for yourself," she invited him.
He sat down in the swing next to hers. "Is this your plan so I
can't touch you?"

“I wanted to ask you something.”

He pushed off with his feet, the swing
swaying lazily. "Anything."

“Why do you think it’ll work this time?”

“Does that mean I don’t have a chance?”

She slowed her swing. “Well, either you’re
still reckless, or you had a clue I wouldn’t turn you down.”

“No risk, no reward, but does it matter? You
said you had to think about it.” He got up and grabbed the chains
of her swing to bring it to a stop. "Beth, you kissed me back."

"So what if I did? It'd been a long time
since I'd been kissed."

It was the wrong thing to say if she didn’t
want him to kiss her again.

****