Never Too Late (10 page)

Authors: Amber Portwood,Beth Roeser

The girls were laughing at me, too. He’d put me on speaker. It was Valentine’s Day, he was hanging out with other girls, and he had me on speaker so they could laugh at how upset I was about it. I couldn’t believe it. After I hung up, I just sat there feeling so shocked and hurt that I didn’t know what to do with myself.

It was about eight at night when he got home, and the trouble continued. Instead of apologizing or talking about what had happened that day, he immediately picked a fight with me over what I was watching on TV. It was just a UFC match or something. I was into that kind of thing for a while back then, training in Krav Maga and all of that. But he walked in and picked a fight with me saying I was only watching UFC so I could check out the guys. He used that as an excuse to get all worked up, and then he left.

I should have known what was going on. It’s almost textbook behavior for someone to throw those weird accusations around when in reality they’re the one off doing something they’re not supposed to do. The way he tried to shift the focus on me, like I was breaking the rules or doing something bad by watching a sport on TV that involved shirtless guys, should have told me he was up to no good. But I wasn’t prepared to see it coming. After he flipped out over me watching UFC, he said he was peacing out to go stay with his mom for a few days. But the truth came out fast. Before long, he called me up crying, or at least acting like he was crying, and saying he had something to tell me. You already know what it was, right?

“I cheated on you.”

Those weren’t girls he just picked up at the mall. He didn’t even go to the mall to get me a present for Valentine’s Day. He went to hang out with those girls because he was messing around with one of them. The whole time that day he was ignoring me, fighting with me, laughing at me, and insulting me, acting like I was doing something wrong, accusing me of checking out other guys on TV, leaving me alone on Valentine’s Day, he was doing it right beside the girl he cheated on me with. And he had her laughing at me.

Nothing between us was ever the same after that. Something just snapped in me that Valentine’s Day. It was the straw that broke our back. I look back on that day as the day everything between us completely changed. I never in a million years thought that man would cheat on me. Yeah, things had gotten harder and we weren’t happy together like we used to be, but I still had in my mind that beautiful, sweet person who used to break into tears if he thought he’d hurt somebody. The man I knew and fell in love with couldn’t stand anybody being mean to somebody. He couldn’t stand the thought of hurting somebody. And here he was breaking my heart.

It was hard to let go of what had been between us. Even as much as that incident hurt me and changed the way I could handle the relationship, our bond was still deep, and it was still strong. We’d shared so much together, and of course we still shared Leah. That closeness and that life and love we shared were always the reasons we never stayed broken up, no matter how bad we fought.

But it was different this time. That betrayal just did something to me inside. The cracks had been forming for a long time, and they’d come from a lot of places. But finally they just got to be too much. My family was the only thing that ever held me back from the edge. But when that wall came up between me and Leah’s father, it was only a matter of time everything else started falling apart. It did not take long.