New Species 05 Brawn (36 page)

Trisha bit her lip. “We’re not Species, Brawn. In our world
the men usually come after the women.”

“I read books and modern females want to be the aggressors
in relationships.”

The doctor smiled. “Yeah, well, most of those articles don’t
speak for all women. I like a man asking me out, opening my doors and being the
one in charge. I’m mated to a Species male, remember? Slade is near barbaric at
times and I love that about him. Don’t go overboard and insult her by not
taking her feelings into consideration but women want a male to sweep them off
their feet. She waited for you to come storm the castle.”

“What castle?”

She grinned. “It’s a saying. She wanted you to come after
her and tell her that she had changed your mind about humans.” She sobered.
“You didn’t and now she believes you only want the baby. She carries your son
and she feels like you’re only trying to be with her for the sake of the child.
No woman wants to be with a man who only wants her because she got pregnant.”

Brawn frowned. “Becca did change my mind about humans and I
want her. The child is a bonus but I’d want her even if there wasn’t one.”

“You need to talk to her, Brawn. She thinks you are going to
feel trapped with her because of the baby. She thinks she can never sexually
please you and that you will seek out other women to fill that need. She is
afraid that because of your differences you can never love her and be happy
with her. Her husband never loved her or made her happy. She’s been hurt inside
badly.”

“I am not him,” Brawn growled. “I would never hate her and I
would never seek another woman. She does please me.”

“Her husband married her for the wrong reasons, Brawn. You
are trying to claim her for the wrong reasons. She shouldn’t be your mate
because she’s carrying your child. She should be your mate because you love her
and want to spend the rest of your lives together. The baby should just be a
result of that love.”

“I will talk to her.”

Trisha nodded. “Keep talking to her because she’s been hurt
by another man. You are going to have to find patience and keep your temper in
check.”

“I do not have patience.”

Trisha stood and lifted her bag off the floor. “It is a good
time to learn.”

Brawn watched Trisha leave the bedroom and waited until he
heard the hotel room door close. He took a few deep breaths and tried to get
his thoughts in order before walking out into the living room. Becca sat on the
couch. Their gazes met.

Brawn slowly stalked toward the couch, sank to his knees on
the floor before her and searched her eyes. She wasn’t crying anymore but the
look of sadness he found there nearly tore his heart from his chest.

“I understand why you cry, Becca.”

“You didn’t hurt me in bed. I didn’t want you thinking you
had. I’m sorry I unloaded my past on you but you don’t seem to understand why
we can’t be together.”

“When I met you, I was very attracted to you.”

That statement surprised her and her eyes widened.

“I admitted as much when you were presenting your ass to me
in the bedroom while you removed the sheets from the bed. Do you want to know
what I wanted to do?” He didn’t wait for her response. “I wanted to fall to my
knees behind you and touch you, Becca. I wanted to smell you, taste you and
bury my dick deep inside you. I wanted to hear you make noises of pleasure
until you cried out my name.”

“But I’m human.”

“I’ve never wanted a human before but I wanted you, Becca.
It shocked me and it made me angry.”

She bit her lip. “Why?”

“I never understood why a few of my kind were attracted to
yours and would take a human as a mate. All I have known are our females,
Becca. Wasn’t it a little daunting for you to be attracted to me?”

“I was a little surprised but you’re very good-looking. It
didn’t matter to me that we’re different.”

“When we were kidnapped you got a taste of what I’ve been
subjected to in the past. Imprisoned, forced to undergo testing and being under
the control of others and the constant fear of our usefulness being over. They
killed us sometimes. You were forced to touch me to get those semen samples. I
felt guilty for enjoying it but I did. My mind has become as twisted as my
captors in that regard. I thought you’d be better off without me yet I wanted
you, Becca. I missed you when we were freed and I wanted you back in my life. I
feared you might hate me for what you’d endured.”

Becca stared into his eyes and hoped the sincerity she saw
was real and not just wishful thinking on her part. “I could never hate you for
what happened to us. You kept me going, comforted me, but you have to admit we
wouldn’t have gotten into this situation if you’d been given a choice.” She
glanced down at her rounded belly before holding his gaze. “It was comfort
sex.”

“I loved touching you. That’s why I felt guilty. You are so
soft and so beautiful, Becca. I wanted you in the worst way and was glad to be
locked inside a cage with you. I was almost grateful because I could touch you.
I never thought being with a human female would be good and it wasn’t, Becca.
It was so much better than good that it is an insult to use such a weak word.
You felt right to me, beautiful. Your touch and your scent. Your body around
mine. You were perfect to me. Do you understand? The look in your eyes, the
taste of your mouth and the feel of you inside where I didn’t want to leave has
driven me crazy daily since we were freed.”

“That’s not true. You would have called me if you wanted to
see me again. You didn’t.”

“I was ordered not to and had to agree that it might only
cause you pain. I believed you’d come after me if you wanted to see me. I think
like a Species because I am one. Our women are very blunt, aggressive and tell
us what they want. I made a mistake and should have come after you.”

She was speechless, wanted to believe him and finally found
her voice. “If it wasn’t for this baby we would never have seen each other
again. You would have gotten on with your life and forgotten all about me. A
baby isn’t a reason to start a relationship, Brawn. I won’t be with you just
because I got knocked up.”

“I was glad when I learned of the child.” He took a deep
breath and calmed down. “That makes me an asshole, doesn’t it? I am glad that
my seed took inside you. When they told me that the doctors would make sure you
had not gotten impregnated with medicines, I wanted to roar my rage because if
my seed took I knew I could have you again and again because I would have a
right to you.” His eyes narrowed and his nose flared. “I am a bastard and an
asshole but damn it, Becca, never think I will hate you or feel trapped by you
having this baby. You should feel trapped because I am not letting you go. You
might be horror-filled to have my baby but I am very well pleased by it. Trisha
says I need patience but what I need is for you to realize you are my mate and
that you belong to me. You need to stop fighting it because it drives me
insane.”

“I’m not the kind of mate who will make you happy.”

He growled at her. “Why do you think that?”

“I’m forever pissing you off. You are growling at me again
and showing teeth, first off. Second off, in the bedroom, while we were having
sex, you had to hold back and you obviously didn’t want to. Admit it, Brawn.
Wouldn’t you have loved not to have to be careful? Wouldn’t it have felt better
for you if you could have done all the things you knew would hurt me?”

His eyes locked with hers. “You were not a virgin. You have
been with another male, Becca. You were married. Your husband touched you. Is
my touching you the same as it was with him?”

“No.” She shook her head, her eyes locked with his. “There’s
no comparison. It’s completely different.”

He nodded. “Then you should understand that what I
experience with you has no comparison to what I knew before. It is more with
you. Stronger. The best, Becca. I have never felt the way I feel with you. You
bring out so much inside me and you are very wrong if you think you do not
please me when we are touching. You please me more than I’ve ever been.” He
cupped her face, his gaze holding hers. “You make me roar, beautiful. I don’t
do that for any female except you. All that control I must find not to hurt you
actually makes our shared sex feel much better at the end when I release that
control before I seed you.”

“I want to believe you.”

“I would not lie. After we were found and we were set free
from the cages I wanted to hit that Trey for hugging you. I don’t like any male
touching you. I wanted to pick you up and carry you out of there and take you
home with me so I could keep you. I knew I couldn’t. You do not like bossy men.
I heard this while you were talking to Trey in your kitchen. I am dominating,
Becca.”

She suddenly laughed. “Really? I’m shocked!”

He smiled. “Sarcasm. I know what this is.”

The doorbell rang and Brawn moved. “I will get your food.”

He opened the door and Breeze stood there with the cart. She
stared at him with a grim expression. “Brawn. I was on kitchen duty. Here is
her food.”

Becca wanted to flinch. This was the woman he’d had a date
with the day Becca had arrived at Reservation. Brawn took the cart and pulled
it into the room. The woman glanced at Becca from the door, took a deep breath
and walked inside the room. She closed the door behind her.

Brawn spun, a growl tearing from his lips. The woman backed
up against the door and her eyes flew to Becca.

“I wanted to talk to you. Could you please tell Brawn to
allow it before he tears out my throat for daring to speak to you? It’s
important.”

Brawn took a threatening step toward the woman but Becca
reacted. “Brawn! Stop.”

He froze and swung his head to Becca, a furious look on his
face. “I told her not to come here or ever speak to you. You got upset with me
for having a date with her when you arrived. It was innocent but you believe I
planned to share sex with her. I didn’t.”

Becca studied Breeze. “Hi, Breeze. What did you want to tell
me?”

Breeze looked grim. “You remember my name.”

“That whole day kind of stuck in my mind.”

“I did not know you were carrying Brawn’s child or I would
have known we no longer had a date. I am sorry for what I said. Tiger was
touching you and no male will allow another to touch his mate so I mistook
Tiger as the father of the baby. Brawn did not and has not gone out with me or
any other female since he returned after he was taken by the Mercile people. I
wanted to tell you this.”

Relief swept through Becca. Brawn had canceled his date with
Breeze and Breeze had no reason to lie. She was willing to trust the other
woman’s word. “Thank you for telling me that. I appreciate it. Really.”

Breeze nodded. “Did he explain to you about the
relationships between our males and females?”

“Some of it.”

Breeze glanced at Brawn warily before inching closer to
Becca. “May I talk with you while you eat? I promise not to upset you or say
hurtful things. I think it will make you feel much better and happy.”

Becca hesitated but nodded. “Do you want to sit down?”

Brawn growled. “I don’t think this is a good idea. I do not
want you to cry again. We were laughing when she came.”

“I have human friends,” Breeze stated. “I said something
hurtful to her about our date. I will make her feel better, I swear, Brawn. I
would like to be her friend.”

He frowned.

“Have a seat,” Becca urged softly.

Brawn didn’t look happy but he brought Becca her food and a
large glass of milk. He placed them in front of her. He turned to the cart and
then placed silverware down for her. “Eat, please.” He sat next to her.

Breeze sat down in a chair. “Species females don’t want
relationships the way human females do,” Breeze explained. “Do you know
anything about our lives before we were freed?”

“A little.” Becca started to cut up her steak.

“We were passed between our males for breeding tests often.
All our lives we have been told what to do and who to do it with. Once we were
freed we became very resistant to taking orders. We don’t want a male to tell
us what to do. We have dominating males. It is how they are. They dominate as
easily as they eat and breathe. For this reason we only agree to have temporary
sexual contact with our males if we want sexual release. We don’t date the same
male more than once in a long while. We don’t want them to suspect we might
want more from them than sex. Am I explaining this well?”

Becca was a bit shocked but she understood. She nodded.

“Brawn and I have no love feelings for each other. There is
no need for you to feel jealous, upset, or threatened by me because we had set
a date. We are from the same testing facility. We have been bred many times
over the years together. We still do not have love feelings for each other the
way humans have in relationships. I respect him, we are friends and I care what
happens to him. That’s it. He was depressed after he was returned to us and I
forced him to agree to spend time with me, thinking it would cheer him up
because, as my friend, I worried about him. Once our males decide to mate with
a female it is different from just sharing sex. Mating is the commitment to
stay with one female and emotions are involved. He will not touch anyone but
you ever again. They are fiercely loyal to a mate. Did he explain any of this
to you?”

“No.”

“I thought not.” Breeze gave her a smile. “He told me about
you. Did he mention this? After he was captured and returned, he snarled at
everyone. He missed you. He thought about you all the time. You put him in a
very foul mood. Many feared he would harm them and Brawn is usually very happy
and mellow. He wasn’t when he returned because he wanted you. Did he tell you
this?”